


Security Authors: The First Season!

by Wherever_Girl



Series: The Security Authors Saga [1]
Category: Disney - All Media Types, Disney's House of Mouse (Cartoon), Multi-Fandom
Genre: Gen, Humor, Old Fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-20
Updated: 2020-06-20
Packaged: 2021-03-04 06:06:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 26
Words: 89,501
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24828787
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wherever_Girl/pseuds/Wherever_Girl
Summary: Authors Wherever Girl and Fanatic97 get jobs as security guards at the famous club, The House of Mouse.And that's when insanity broke loose.
Series: The Security Authors Saga [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1795948





	1. Now Hiring: Part One!

**Author's Note:**

  * For [FanaticAo397](https://archiveofourown.org/users/FanaticAo397/gifts).



Title: **Security Authors**  
Category: Misc » Cartoon X-overs  
Author: Wherever Girl  
Language: English, Rating: Rated: K+  
Genre: Humor/Adventure  
Published: 02-08-13, Updated: 01-18-14  
Chapters: 26, Words: 90,124

* * *

**And now for another story of which I shall try to update while working on others and dealing with the pressures of life. Enjoy! :D**

**And disclaimer claims neither I nor Fanatic97 own any of the Disney, Transformers, Calvin and Hobbes, Kingdom Hearts or any other company-owned characters that will appear in this story.**

**My Kitty: Meow. *Translation: "This is going to be trippy."**

**Ignore my sarcastic cat who just lost her catnip mouse privileges, and LETS GET THIS STORY ROLLING!**

*o*

It was a typical night at the House of Mouse. Beloved Disney stars pulled up to the club for a night of entertainment, watching a few Mickey Mouse cartoons, and seeing O'Mally and the Ally Cats perform (hoping the band wouldn't get cancelled or delayed THIS time). Everything was going smoothly: The cartoons were good, none of the villains were causing too much trouble, and Goofy only goofed up five times. It was all well…

*KA-BOOM!*

…up until the security guard got blasted back by Vinny's dynamite, regardless that his comrades from the Atlantis journey told him time and time again to leave it at home. When the security guard had tried to confiscate it, he only ended up hitting the detonator, which was the reason why he was planted against the brick, plastered wall.

"That's it! I QUIT!" The security guard shouted, prying himself off the wall and heading for the exit.

"Wait, don't go!" Mickey cried, rushing up in front of him. "I know this isn't the easiest job in the city, but you have to understand-"

"No, YOU have to understand, Mouse! I've been electrocuted, set on fire, pied in the face FIVE TIMES, hit on by two evil stepsisters, caught an allergic reaction to pixie-dust, not to mention that waiter of yours spilled ten plates of spaghetti on me all at once… AND I HAVEN'T EVEN BEEN HERE AN HOUR!" he pushed Mickey aside and stormed out the door. "And in case you haven't noticed, I'M NOT SUICIDAL!"

…he said this as he stood in the middle of the street, only to get hit by a bus.

Mickey stood outside the front door with Minnie at his side, hanging his head low. "Oh, Mickey, what are we going to do?" Minnie asked, laying a hand on his shoulder. "That was the 37th security guard this month!"

"I guess they don't make them like they used to," Max said, trying to lighten things up.

"Ah, that guy was a wimp anyway," Donald scoffed. "I'd do a better job watching this place!"

"So who's next on the list?" Daisy asked.

"No one, that was the last one the agency said they would send us," Mickey sighed, shaking his head.

Suddenly, Pete drove up, smirking. "Not having any problems with security, are you, Mouse?" he asked, slyly. "Because you know what I told you before…"

_~Flashback~_

Pete and Mickey stood outside the House of Mouse, a month prior. "Alright, Mouse, I've been noticing a lack of security around here, lately. Either you find yourself a good security guard, or this place gets shut down!" Pete was demanding.

Mickey shrugged. "Security Guard? That will be easy," he said.

"You'd think that, wouldn't you? Word on the street that there's been quite a few loonies running around… and if I find out there's been anything dangerous happening in or around this club, you can kiss this place goodbye! Do we understand each other?"

"Don't worry about it. I hire only the best!"

_~Present~_

Mickey's shoulders slumped. "Um, well, we've been looking into it, but haven't found anyone suitable for the job JUST yet- but we've still got plenty of resources, so don't try anything just yet!" he lied.

Pete burst out laughing. "HA! I've seen the guys leaving this place! Only a complete MANIAC, filled with every kind of INSANITY, who was absolutely PSYCHO, would sign up for the job!" he teased.

*descending whistle*

A large shadow covered Pete's car just then. "What the…?" he looked up.

*CRASH!*

A giant safe landed on the car (Pete included), and the door opened, revealing the two authors, Wherever Girl and Fanatic97. "Did someone say 'psycho'?" Fanatic boasted.

"And insanity?" WG added.

"AND MANIAC?" They exclaimed together.

"Oh no…" Max groaned, covering his face. "It's my brother's crazy girlfriend, and one of her even crazier friends."

"Thank you, Max… for that MARVELOUS introduction," WG said with a smirk, then turned to the reader. "Anyone who can guess where that quote comes from gets a cookie-"

"OH! Hocus Pocus!" Fanatic exclaimed, sticking his hand in the air.

"DARN IT, FANATIC! THAT WAS FOR THE READER!"

"Sorry. …Do I still get a cookie?"

"Um, who exactly ARE you kids?" Mickey asked, a bit confused and startled.

"We're just two authors looking for a job…" WG said, smiling while rocking on her heels.

"And from the sounds of it, you've got a position open!" Fanatic added, while munching on a cookie.

"Well, are you sure you're qualified?" Minnie asked. "This job is a tad, er, hazardous."

"Are you kidding? They just dropped out of the sky in a SAFE!" Donald snapped.

"…What the heck was that all about, anyway?" Max asked, looking at the safe.

"Lets just say, the employees at Wal-Mart don't like to be messed with after 3 AM with loony antics," Fanatic answered.

WG rubbed her hands together. "So! When can we begin?" she asked. "Because I'm saving up for a college tuition and need the cash, and babysitting is getting me nowhere."

"Uh, lets start with an interview, first. Right this way," Mickey said, albeit nervously, as he and the others showed the two authors the way in.

Pete stuck his hand out from under the safe, waving it wildly. "Hey! Someone get this thing off me!" he shouted in a muffled voice.

*o*

After an interview, going over a few references, and going over a few rules, Mickey decided to hire the two authors… mostly out of desperation, considering they were his only solution. "I'm glad you guys are willing to work here," the famous mouse said to them, shaking their hands. "Now, are you sure you'll be willing to handle the hours, let alone any oncoming mayhem?"

"Hey, we've dealt with worse," Fanatic assured.

"Yeah, there's nothing we can't handle," WG said… then her eyes bugged out. "OH MY GOSH! IS THAT BELLE AND THE BEAST?!" she then whipped out a ridiculously large autograph book, rushing to the table.

"…except WG's heart-rate,"

Mickey watched the crazed authoress run from table to table, getting autographs from her favorite characters, villains, and sidekicks, up until Fanatic threw a net over her and dragged her back. "…Why do I get the feeling this was a bad idea?" he moaned, then went to his dressing room.

Fanatic dragged WG to the front door. "Calm down, woman, we're only on the first chapter for Lord's sake!"

"Sorry… my nostalgic inner-Disney fan kicked in," WG said, shrugging. "You should've seen it when I first ran into the Fangface gang,"

"Yeah, it was all over Fox News… where on earth did you get the machete, anyway?"

"Amazon. …So are we going to start guarding or what? Because I'm already up to four pages and nothing interesting has happened yet! When is the action going to start?!"

"Don't ask ME! You're the one writing the story!"

"Well YOU'RE the co-author, and this whole story was YOUR idea!"

Fanatic sneered, stuffing his hands in his pockets. "Not MY fault you're losing your touch…"

"Oh, THAT'S IT!"

The two authors got into a brawl…

…not noticing two shadowed figures sneak into the building.

_Meanwhile in the building…_

Mickey stood on stage. "And now, here's a cartoon, starring our friend, Goofy!" he introduced. As the lights dimmed and the cartoon started, he stepped off the stage, meeting the others backstage. "Well, how are things going?"

"So far, not too bad…" Minnie answered, though heard the sound of the authoress being thrown through a window. "For the most part… Mickey, are you sure hiring those two was a good idea? Max said they're sort of… goofy."

"That's ridiculous!" Goofy scoffed. "Everyone knows I'M Goofy!"

Mickey and Minnie exchanged looks. "Well… they're the only ones who were willing to work, and if they can pull it off, it'll keep Pete off our backs," Mickey answered. "We just have to give them a chance,"

"Lets just hope nothing goes wrong," Daisy sighed.

*o*

**A/N: Next chapter… will the authors manage to keep the job? (I hope so, I've got a college fund at stake here!)**

**Also, special thanks to my co-author, Fanatic97, for this idea.**

**Please review, but don't flame. Seriously- I carry dynamite by the stacks!**


	2. Now Hiring: Part Two!

**Now to see how well Fanatic and I do on the job :D**

0o0

_Later that night…_

It took a while, but WG and Fanatic managed to break out of their brawl, calling a truce, and getting back to the job. "So… see any good movies, lately?" WG asked, deciding to start a conversation.

"Not since we got locked in that safe and catapulted across the country," Fanatic answered.

"Ah."

It was quiet then, for a couple seconds.

"MAN this is boring! You'd think being a security guard in the tooniverse would be more exciting!"

"Give it time, WG, we've only been here for like…" Fanatic looked at his watch. "Three hours. …How late does this place stay open, anyway?"

"I dunno. But I'm not just going to stand around here and do nothing- even IF that's what being a security guard is all about." she turned and started heading for the building. "I'm going to go check around, make sure no nut-jobs snuck in while we weren't looking."

"Oh, no you don't! You're staying guard right out here!" Fanatic pulled her back.

"What?! Why?!"

"Because you and I BOTH know that, if you went in there, you'd see one of your favorite Disney stars, go wacky, and bring up a bunch of ideas for spin-offs or sequel-remakes! …And that doesn't come until later! I'LL go on patrol, you just stay put!"

"Aww… you never let me have any fun."

While WG sat there and pouted, Fanatic went inside the building.

*o*

_Meanwhile, on the roof…_

"This is it, once we're inside, no one can stop us!"

"What about the security guards?"

"Pffft, don't worry about them. They wouldn't have the nerve!"

"Did you not notice that one of them was CARRYING A MACHETE?!"

"Yeah, but she never does any harm with it…"

"…you obviously never been to the New Years Eve party last year,"

"And YOU have?!"

"…um, no. But from what I've heard, I'm glad I hadn't. What are we doing at this place, anyway?"

"Simple. We're going to make this club have a night no one shall ever forget! Mwuahahaha! …now help me shimmy down this air-duct."

"If you say so…"

*push*

"Not so faaaAAAAAAST!"

*Clank! Clink! Clunk! Clonk!*

"ow…."

"Ooh, they're going to have a fit about all those dents in that duct,"

*o*

Fanatic paused, hearing the clanging sounds in the air-vents. "Either this place has air-conditioning problems, or we're about to get a cameo appearance," he said to himself.

As he walked by, Jasmine and Aladdin looked at him. "Is that one of Mickey's new security guards?" she whispered.

"Yeah, looks like he just got out of a brawl with WG," Aladdin replied. "Chances are, with them on guard, nothing dangerous will enter this place,"

"Oh, sure, and maybe we'll get our network back from those pop-star brats," Iago huffed, flying onto their table. "If you ask me, this place is going to be a time-bomb waiting to go off with them around! You know how psychotic WG is… and her friend looks even more crazy!"

"Iago, how can you say that?" Jasmine scolded.

"You mean besides one of them made a human-shaped crater in the middle of the floor?" He thumbed over at a hole shaped suspiciously like Fanatic… which Goofy accidentally fell into. "I'm telling you, those kids might be trouble!"

Aladdin and Jasmine shook their heads. However, Iago wasn't the only one with a negative opinion about the new security guards. "Smee, I'm telling you, those two lads may be the death of us yet!" Captain Hook was ranting. "That blonde boy asked if he could try on my hook- next thing you know, he may be stealing my OTHER hand!"

"Er, actually, Captain… the blonde one is a girl," Smee answered.

"Nonetheless, they're still too rambunctious to- did you say girl? That be odd…"

"I don't see why they hired those two psychotic kids, when they have me here!" Gaston was boasting to the triplet girls who swooned over him. "No one's a better security guard than Gaston!"

"If he got the job, this club would be in the toilet," The Reluctant dragon huffed to Elliot, who chuckled.

Safe to say, not many of the Disney stars thought having WG and Fanatic around decreased their chances of danger- rather, they felt their presence increased it. And the staff could feel the tension rising. "Sheesh, they've only been here three hours, and already everyone's complaining about the security," Daisy scoffed.

"Well can you blame them? Those kids are nuts!" Donald sneered.

"Oh, just give them a chance," Minnie said. "I'm sure, once they see how useful they can be, everyone will change their minds about them,"

"Yeah, WG is a nice girl- even if she knows how to make holes in the floor with someone else's body." Goofy said. "And Fanatic is purty nice too, even if he does launch crazy girls out a window,"

"Not too reassuring, Goofy," Clarabelle replied.

WG walked in just then. "The perimeter outside is clear," she said. "Only problem is that Pete-pancake that won't shut up about that safe on his head."

"Where's Fanatic?" Minnie asked.

"He came inside to check around, make sure no one came inside during our brawl. …Hey, speak of Churnabog, there he is now."

Fanatic was walking over, but froze, taking out a cross and holding it up in defense. "CHURNABOG?! WHERE?!" he gasped. "WG, quick, hand me some holy water!"

"It was an expression, Fanatic! Your soul is safe!"

"Oh… I knew that. (ahem) Well, everything is clear in here. No problems as far as the eye can-"

*Zap!*

The lights went out just then. "As far as the eye can WHAT, Fanatic?" Daisy asked, cynically.

"As far as the eyes can… smell!" Fanatic said quickly. "And since eyes clearly can't smell, I meant there IS something going on! C'mon, WG!"

"Right behind ya, Fanatic!" WG said.

"Actually, you're in front of me."

"Oh. Well, c'mon then!" With that, the authors maneuvered their way around the dark.

"Everybody, calm down, please!" Mickey called to the crowd, holding a flashlight. "We're just having a power-out, nothing to worry about!"

"I bet one of those authors caused it!" Timon called. "I saw one of them wanting a souvenir lightening bolt from Zeus!"

"They probably smashed the other against the circuit-box!" Cruella sneered.

"Or they made us all go BLIND!" Drizzella shrieked.

"EVERYONE, LISTEN!" Mickey called. "It's just. A power. Outage! Nothing dangerous!"

Suddenly, the screen came on, showing a giant, glowing skeletal face, cackling. "Hello, House of Mouse patrons!" it said in an electric voice. "Say hello to your new guest!"

Mickey stared in shock. _Or… maybe so._ he thought, gulping.

**TO BE CONTINUED…**

… **.**

… **.**

… **.**

**right now.**

The giant skull on the screen cackled, while the crowd stared in shock and fear. "What's going on?! Who are you?!" Mickey demanded. "What do you want?"

"One question at a time!" The skull snapped. "First, this is known as 'crashing the party'. Second, I am your new guest… and what I want is for you to heed my demands!"

Mickey crossed his arms. "Why should we listen to you?!" Immediately, a sand-bag from the rafters dropped, inches from crushing him.

"Any more questions? Good. NOW LISTEN UP! First, I want all these cutesy Disney characters out of here- THAT MEANS YOU, BIG-EYES!"

Bambi cringed, ducking behind his table.

"Second, let the villains run this place- they're the ones who REALLY make the movies good!"

"I don't know who this guy is, but so far his demands sound… acceptable," Jafar said with a smirk… but got hit with a tomato. "WHO THREW THAT?!"

"Third, I demand a different set of cartoons in this place… say, in the comic genre!"

While the skull was listing his demands, Fanatic and WG were sneaking through the dark, hearing a voice that sounded like the skull's coming from behind the curtains. "Pssst, Mickey! Over here!" Fanatic whispered, motioning Mickey and the rest of the staff over.

WG saw the power-switch and turned the lights back on, making the skull on the screen a little hard to see. "HEY! Turn off the lights! No one can see how scary I look!" Fanatic pulled back the curtain…

Where they saw Calvin and Hobbes, the six-year-old nuisance wearing a glow-in-the-dark skull mask and standing in front of a camera, which projected his image on the screen. "Um, Calvin?" Hobbes whispered, standing behind the camera.

"(Not now, Hobbes! I still have more demands) …As I was saying, I want to see comic characters- specifically ones about a brave, hansom boy genius who has a tiger companion…" Calvin was boasting, speaking into one of those toy microphones that disguises one's voice.

"Calvin…"

"(I said not now, stripe-butt!)"

"CALVIN!" Hobbes pointed behind him.

"WHAT?!" Calvin bitterly spun around… his eyes going wide when he saw WG and Fanatic looming over him. "…oh."

***BOOT!***

"YEEEEOOOOOOW!" Calvin and Hobbes screamed once they were kicked out of the House of Mouse.

"Sheesh, cameos- always gotta crash a party," WG scoffed.

"Wow, who would have guessed it was a six-year-old brat and a stuffed tiger trying to freak us out?" Max said.

"At least the guests are relieved, now." Minnie said. "They're still not too sure how well you'll work out, but I think if you keep up the effort- and stop brawling so much- they'll start to like you."

"I'm sure they will… after all, it's only Chapter 2," Fanatic said with a shrug.

"Yep, so far, we're off to a good start," WG said, then rubbed her chin. "Though… why do I get the feeling we've forgotten something?"

*o*

_Meanwhile outside…_

"Hey!" Pete called from underneath the safe. "Someone get this thing off me already!"

*o*

"Ah, probably wasn't important," Fanatic replied.

Mickey stood onstage. "Thank you all for coming. See you all again real soon!" he called. All the guests left, though not many acknowledged the authors…

…at least, almost no one. "Thanks for getting rid of that skull," Mowgli said to them. "You guys are pretty cool."

WG and Fanatic looked at each other smiled. If one Disney star saw some good in them, chances were the rest would too, soon enough.

*o*

**A/N: Next episode, Calvin and Hobbes attempt to sneak back in… along with some so-called 'princesses' who may cause trouble.**

**Please review. No flames or I shall put on the skull mask and haunt your dreams until the end of time.**


	3. Rip-Off Princess Primadonnas

**This chapter (as well as some future chapters) was written by Fanatic97. Thanks for the help, man!**

**Disclaimer: We still own nothing!**

*o*

It was our average normal night at the House of mouse…well okay normal meaning the place had yet to be blown into a thousand bits and pieces.

Inside the Club everything was running fine as usual…okay so O'Mally and the Ally Cats got cancelled again, but that was expected nowadays by well…pretty much everyone.

All the guests were having a GREAT time, chatting, socializing, and brawling…on the off chance that Pain and Panic annoyed Twiddle Dee and Twiddle Dum…again.

"We're telling you OUR MOVIE IS…" Snapped Twiddle Dee.

"…Better than yours by a long shot!" ended Twiddle Dum . "In fact, yours has been considered…"

"…One of Disney's worst EVER, and that is saying something considering the sequels!" ended Twiddle Dee.

"OH YEAH?" Snapped Panic. "Well, at least OURS wasn't replaced by a TIM BUTRON AND JOHNNY DEPP FLICK!"

"You take that back!" Dee and Dum yelled out.

"NEVER!" Pain and Panic replied.

They both lunged at each other, with the intent to tear the other Limb from Limb. Until that is, Out of Nowhere--

" **SMASH!"**

" **CRASH!"**

All four of them were laying on the ground, Pain and Panic, hit with a baseball bat, and Dee, and Dum had been hit with a shovel.

Fanatic looked at WG. "I TOLD Mickey that he should buy us tasers!" he snapped.

WG looked back at him. "Yeah well he said that they were too violent." she scoffed.

Belle, who had been sitting next to the fight, was staring at them. "And what you guys just did wasn't violent?" she questioned, arching an eyebrow.

WG looked at Belle, and her eyes swelled up at the fact that she was speaking to her, but Fanatic shoved her aside and spoke for her.

"Well Mickey said keep the peace in the club, and we are. " he said, earning a glare from his co-author.

Just then, Goofy, walked into the Fanatic shaped hole from the last episode. "YAHOWIE!" He yelled out.

WG and Fanatic looked at each other and then Fanatic said, "Your turn this time WG."

The Authoress groaned as she grabbed a fishing rod and then reeled goofy out of the hole.

As she did this, and Fanatic dragged Pain, Panic, Dee and Dum, out of the club. Club rules state that brawling isn't allowed after what happened with Chernabog and Zeus, of which they are not allowed to talk about it., Mickey leapt up on stage to do the intro.

"And now your host, the biggest eared, friendliest Mouse you'll ever meet, MICKEY MOUSE!" Mike yelled out.

As he said this, Mickey Mouse Leapt out onto the stage. "Ha, Ha, Evening Everyone, tonight we've got something REALLY juicy up our sleeves."

As he said this, he lowered his arm, and a galleon of Orange Juice fell out of the sleeve and burst all over the stage.

Mickey, stared at the jug then he blushed. "Heh, heh… just a little humor on my part folks. Anyway, tonight is, Adaptation Night!"

As he said this, on the screen, appeared The Duck Knight Returns Comic Book Cover Image., followed by the Ducktails Comic Book Cover Rightful Owners.

"So sit back Everyone as we revisit both Duckburg, and ST Canard ALL IN ONE NIGHT!"

Mickey, then ran off Stage, as Rightful Owners began playing, and Found WG in the back. "WG, security Report?"

WG, snapped off a salute like a sailor, and then began speaking in a gruff sailor voice.

"COMMANDER MICKEY SIR! NO SIGNS OF UNAUTHORIZED PERSONEL OR GUESTS SIR! ONLY BREACH IN SECRUITY WAS A BRAWL BETWEEN TWO SIDE KICKS FROM HERCULES AND ALICE IN WONDER LAND, THE NINETEN- FIFTY ONE!"

Mickey gave a blank stare at her. "You know how much I hate that."

WG looked at him. "Really? Fanatic told me that you loved it."

Mickey groaned, and then pinched the bridge of his nose. Just then, Minnie ran in. "Mickey, are Cinderella, Snow White, Mulan, and Jasmine present in the club?"

Mickey looked at her. "I think so, why do you ask?"

Minnie looked at him, and then put her hand to her chin. "Well,"

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o 0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o 0o0o0o0o

"Come on." A whiney female voice moaned to Fanatic. "You have to let us in."

Fanatic stared at the newcomers. Three of them looked like Cinderella, Snow White, and Jasmine, the one that looked like Jasmine was the most accurate, but it was also inaccurate as well.

The Other one was this Chinese looking little girl that looked like she was trying to pull off a Mulan, but failing …..Miserably.

"FOR THE LAST TIME NO!" Fanatic Snapped. The one that looked like Jasmine looked up at him.

"Oh Come on you have to believe us, we ARE Cinderella, Snow White, Jasmine, and Mulan, we just got turned into little kids!"

Fanatic stared blankly at them. "I'll believe it, when a Transformers Show gets a FULL fourth season."

At that, the one that looked like Cinderella, pulled out an Ipad rip off, and then searched up . "OFFICIAL!" Fanatic snapped once again. The Girl put her Ipad knock off back.

Mickey, Minnie, WG, and Goofy, who was still attached to the fishing line, came running up to them.

"Alright what is the problem here?" Mickey asked. Then he saw the girls. "And who are they?"

Before any of them could say more than we, Fanatic spoke up. "Cindy, Bianca, Hemi, and Zagi."

Mickey looked at him. "Who?"

"A group of Knockoffs of Disney Princesses. There movie, Little Princess School, is infamous on the Internet."

WG stared at him. "You mean to tell me that you watched a Movie called Little Princess School willingly?"

Fanatic cringed. "Eew, to heck no! I found a commentary on it! They also did _the Magic_ _Voyage_ and _the Animated Titanic_ Movies." He looked back at the girls. "They just tired to get into the Club, by pretending to be Cinderella, Snow White, Mulan, and Jasmine, there is also a Tiana Knockoff, but I do not see her."

Minnie, looked at him. "How did those two Comic Characters get in again?" she asked.

"The Vents but I got something up there for them." WG said, smirking.

Right as she said this, Calvin and Hobbes were heard screaming, as a pack of Rabid Calvin and Hobbes Fan girls chased them off the Roof and Down the Street. "NO! NO! I'M TOO YOUNG FOR COOTIES! MOMMY!" Calvin screamed.

"I always dreamed of being chased by girls, but this is ridiculous!" Hobbes cried.

Everyone stared after them. "They have Fan girls?" Max asked.

"Yep, Shocked me too." Replied WG.

Mickey walked ahead of everyone and looked at the four look a likes. He wanted to be fair, and not harsh. "Alright you can come in." he said.

"WHAT!?" Everyone else cried out.

"YAY!" The Girls shouted.

"If you can answer these Questions correctly." Mickey ended. He then pointed at Cindy. "How Long was Cinderella's Running time and what year was it released. "

Cindy looked at him, and then gulped. "Um, The Running time is an…Hour and Fifty Minutes, and the year was, um, 1984?"

"Nope sorry, the Answer was, One Hour and Fourteen Minutes, and the year was 1950."

"But that's not fair!" Snapped Cindy.

"Well if you were Cinderella you would know that." He then Moved onto Bianca. "Which Came First: Fantasia, Snow White, or Me?"

Bianca, looked at him, mumbling for a second, she responded with, "Umm, Snow White?"

"Oh, I'm Sorry, It was me."

"Ego Answer." Muttered WG. Minnie kicked her in the knee. "OUCH! "

Mickey then moved onto Zagi. "Who was Jafar's partner?"

"Um… Starscream?" Zagi answered, dumbly.

Mickey looked at her dead panned. "We do not even own Starscream's name!"

Fanatic looked at him. "Well she was close, both his Generation One incarnation and Iago's voice sound like someone who sucked on Helium for several years is just now getting their voice back to normal."

"I HEARD THAT!" Iago yelled, who was flying past.

Mickey, then Moved onto the last one Hemi. "What was the name of your Dragon Partner?"

"Eww, Dragons are gross." Hemi sneered.

At that point, she was suddenly scorched by fire. Everyone looked up to see a Large Metallic Dragon fly overhead, it screeched as it flew off into the night.

Fanatic triedd to charge on after it, but was caught by WG. "You can chase him down and get him to sign your MISB Version of his figure later Fanatic." she said.

"MISB, I NEVER LEAVE MY TRANSFORMERS MISB! I want his Autograph!" Fanatic wailed.

Wg looked at him. "And to think you had to do this to me in the first Episode.'"

Mickey looked at them. "Well then, I'm sorry girls, but you can't come in, Disney Characters allowed only at this point and time." he told the girls.

Cindy looked at him angrily. "JUST YOU WAIT, WE SHALL RETURN AND GET INTO THIS CLUB!" She snapped. And then with them all, carrying Hemi, they…bounced on their butts, away.

Everyone stared after them, and WG let Fanatic go….Big mistake as he took off down the street running like the Road runner.

Soon everyone was looking after him. Goofy chuckled. "Wow, he sure can run fast, and uh, why did we kick out Cinderella, Snow White, Mulan, and Jasmine again?" he asked, not knowing the other girls were actually fakes.

"I'll explain later." WG said. "Right now I've got to stop Fanatic before he-"

Off in the Distance, a crashing sound was heard Followed by a roar. "LEAVE ME ALONE!" a voice yelled out.

"JUST SIGN THE STINKING PAPER!" Fanatic's voice called. WG sighed and then took off running down the street.

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Meanwhile with the Knockoffs they arrived at a ally way, where their friend Iria, a Tiana Rip off, with an Afro, was waiting.

"Well how did it go?" she asked.

"Not good." Zagi, replied. "They kicked us out, by making us answer very hard questions."

"Do not worry girls, I have a plan." Cindy said. "We must not give up, we will show that we can rise above the rest of the low life's who try to break in, and GET INTO THAT CLUB!

"But how?" Asked Bianca, They have tight Security."

"Remind me again did you just vie up or were you kicked out?" Iria asked.

"Okay so we gave up, but they sicked a giant Robo Dragon on US!"

"Maybe we could hire a lawyer."

"SO what, we are going up against Disney, they can sue us back, and then take away EVERYTHING!"

"Come on girls, I know a way, all we have to do is just trust me." Cindy said. "Besides we always get what we want/need/have to do, we do it all the time in our movie!"

She's right, it does happen a lot." Zagi, said.

"Come one girls let's get a move on!" Cindy said.

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Max stared at the singed Fanatic, who clutched a piece of paper, that was mostly burned and scratched.

"Um Fanatic, you know he didn't sign it right?"

"WHO CARES MAX, HE STILL CLAWED AT IT AND BREATHED FIRE ON IT!" he exclaimed.

WG sighed. "I'll go check the perimeter."

"Um Shouldn't Fanatic do that?" Max asked.

"Well, he's going all Fanboy over some burnt paper, so I would hate to spoil his moment."

"Yes but, Mickey said HE patrols inside after what happened when you did it."

"All I wanted was to borrow and test out Jafar's snake-staff on my hyperactive nieces." WG said Lamely. "Besides it still wasn't THAT BAD."

"Then Explain why LAUNCHPAD MCQUACK is staying away for a few weeks due to some Mental and Emotional Problems."

"… No Comment." WG said. "But I promise Max, it will not be that bad this time."

She walked into the club, and then made her way to the entrance of the kitchen.

As she walked into the door, she heard a voice.

"Hey Security guard!"

WG looked up, to see Cindy, holding some Boiling Water in a pan, and then she proceeded to dump it on her.

"YEOW! YOU LITTLE BRAT! THAT BURNS!" WG cried, as she stumbled Backwards.

As she stumbled, She fell over a bean placed by Hemi, and then fell into a crate, which then, Bianca's Animal Friends carried it off into the prop Basement Staircase landing, and then ran back into the club, and then slammed the door shut.

"Well, this is a problem." WG put bluntly.

"Speak for yourself, I've been living in this crate for a few years now, and you're the first person to ever find me, now, want to help me Review Escape from Planet Earth?" a certain Bum asked.

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Meanwhile, at the Club Entrance, the Five Knock Offs, were about to go in. "This is t girls, our moment of truth, once we go in, we make HISTORY!" Cindy said.

"EEEEE!" The other girls said. And then….bounced in.

Iago, looked around, half expecting to see either WG or Fanatic walk past, he hoped for the latter, when he saw Zagi. He blinked and then Rubbed his eyes. "Am I seeing double?" He asked, then looked at Jasmine and then he noticed that Abu, was giving him the same look.

"You thinking What I'm thinking Monkey?" Iago asked him.

"Ummm." Abu said, then Shrugged.

"Alright, Get me Mushu, Cricket, Ray, Louis, and Rajah, I'll go round up Jaq, Gus , and the Rest of the Animals."

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The Knockoff's bounced around, giggling and laughing.

"I can't Believe that no one has spotted us yet." Zagi said.

"That's why were keeping to the back," Said Cindy. "We don't want anyone seeing us."

"Too late." Iago said.

They all looked up, to see the assorted Allies of Tiana, Cinderella, Snow White, Mulan, and Jasmine in front of them.

Mushu, breathed a breath of fire. "Alright girls, he/she who messes or infringes on my girls copyright, get a nice round of FLAME!"

"AHHHHHH!" The girls screamed and charged out the door, with them all following.

Tiana, Cinderella, Snow White, Mulan and Jasmine stared after them, from their Respective Tables.

Tiana looked at them. "I don't know about you girls, but I think that it's weird that despite them SOUNDING scared, they NEVER stopped Smiling. "

Mulan cringed. "Ugh tell me about it, and my own Knock off, couldn't even open her eyes."

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The Knock Offs ran, as fast as they could, which isn't saying much considering that they were bouncing on their butts.

As they ran, they came to end as a door to the Prop Room was flung open, out first came Chester. A. Bum.

"LOOK OUT! CRAZY WOMAN ON THE LOOSE!" He cried as he ran. Out next came WG.

She was red in the face, her eyes LITERALLY had fire in them, steam was pouring from her nostrils, flaming ear wax Spewed from her ears, and molten lava seeped through her teeth.

The Princess Knock Off's looked around, Animals to the South, WG to the North, Mickey, Minnie, and the Still; brunt Fanatic to the Right, and…Chester . A/ Bum Waving hello to the left.

"Gulp." They all said.

" **POW!"**

In less than a Second they had been booted from the Club.

WG and Fanatic both watched them go/bounce away screaming and crying.

Fanatic looked at her. "Yeesh, I would hate to see you REALLY get Angry."

As he said this, WG whipped away the ketchup from her teeth, removed the Flame Throwers from behind her ears, and then pulled out the contacts with holographic fire on them out of her eyes. “It never hurts to practice,” she replied.

Max sighed. "Well at least nothing Relatively REALLY bad happened here tonight."

Inside Goofy walked with a Hundred Plates full of Bugs. "Okay who ordered the Bug Special!?" He called out.

"OOH, THAT'S US!" Timon called out.

"All Right then!" Goofy said, and then fell into the Hole Once again.

"YAHOWIE!" As he did, the Plates full of Bugs flew into the air.

"Huh Boy." Said Timon, and then Hid Behind Pumba.

**CRASH!"**

From inside could be heard screaming and yelling from all the Bugs landing on everyone and Everything.

"Your Turn Fanatic." WG said. Fanatic groaned, as he grabbed some Bug Spray, and a Fishing Rod, and then Ran inside the Club.

*o*

**A/N: Special thanks goes to Fanatic for this chapter. No flames or the knock-offs become official princesses! (okay we're not THAT cruel, but it won't be pretty!)**


	4. Babysitting Pains

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Trivia: In the original draft, only WG was left babysitting Baby Shelby (probably to make her irl babysitting job at the time feel easier)... until she decided that if she had to suffer, EVERYONE had to suffer!

**Disclaimer: We do not own the House of Mouse, or Any Characters used here… (And thank God that only Disney owns Baby Shelby)**

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It was yet another average night in Toontown…..in fact it was less average, only three buildings had blown up that day. (This meant poor business for the competing Construction Companies in Toon Town.)

At Disney's House of Mouse things were working out as usual… actually not, no one had shown up to cause trouble, the Villains were behaving after what happened with WG and the blender, and Fanatic and the missile launcher, and the cartoons were some new ones as well.

(Rumor has it that in order for them to be, Mickey hired some Authors)

Meanwhile outside the club, our Favorite,(COUGH COUGH!), Authors were standing Outside with Max, as these Episodes shall Probably begin to start out now.

Fanatic was moving one of his arms in a swishing motion. "THIS IS HOW A WIND SHEILD WIPER WORKS, Swish!"

"Oh." Said WG, who then took notes in a tiny notepad.

Max stared at them incredulously. "What are you guys doing?"

"Killing time until the Plot shows up." WG responded, and then she proceeded to hit a watch with a mallet with the word Plot on it.

"Let's hope that speeds up the Process, if not then maybe someone shall make a cameo."

Suddenly "HEY YOU TWO SECURITY GUARDS!" A voice yelled blowing both WG and Fanatic into a wall.

"Hey it DID WORK!" Fanatic cheered as they peeled themselves off of the wall.

They both looked up to see Mrs. Turtle, and in her arms was her son Baby Shelby.

"Oh no," Max groaned. "Not her again."

Mrs. Turtle ignored him and then walked over to WG, plopping Shelby down in her arms.

"I'm going into the club to have a good time, but my little baby Shelby doesn't want to go inside with me, so YOU TWO have to watch him."

"US?!" Cried WG. "Why us?! Why can't you just hire a baby sitter?! I took this job to get OUT of babysitting!"

"BECAUSE I DON"T TRUST PEOPLE I DON'T KNOW!" Mrs. Turtle yelled.

"But… you don't know us." Fanatic pointed out.

"Yes, but you two are SECURITY GUARDS, thereby I can trust you both with my son- OTHERWISE IT MEANS AN EARLY GRAVE FOR THE BOTH OF YOU!" Then she patted Shelby on the head. "Be good sweetie, oh and remember, if anyone harms him in anyway, then this club is gonna be looking for two Security guards!"

And with that she stomped off into the club.

The authors looked down at Shelby, who looked at them and then began pointing and laughing.

"Well sucks to be you WG, I'm off to patrol the Perimeter." Fanatic said, and then tried to make a run for it.

"UH NO!" WG cried and then grabbed Fanatic's shirt collar. "You're sticking around here!"

"But YOU'RE a professional babysitter, you can handle this!" Fanatic yelled out in Retaliation.

"Too bad, so sad, you're staying- otherwise you can kiss your Transformers cameos goodbye." WG said, and then plopped Fanatic back outside.

Baby Shelby, began laughing his head off. "Yeah, Yuck it up you little squirt." Fanatic grumbled.

"This sucks… What could be worse?"

Calvin and Hobbes then came up, a wagon full of water-balloons. "Alright, guys, we demand entrance into the club, otherwise you'll be soaked until the year 2020!" the six-year-old demanded.

Fanatic arched an eyebrow. "She said what could be WORSE, not what could be more annoying." he said.

"Ooooh, stuck babysitting that bratty little turtle, huh?" Hobbes asked, in which Shelby blew a raspberry at him.

WG looked at Shelby. "Well on the Plus side, we have both seen the Cartoons with him, so that means that we KNOW he will try to escape and that way we can counter act him."

Then, Shelby reached into his shell, and then held something up over his head.

"Where did you get that Grand Piano?" WG asked.

"CRASH!"

"AH, HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!" Shelby laughed as he ran inside.

The two authors burst from the Piano, and then Fanatic screamed, "GET BACK HERE OR SO HELP ME, I'LL TURN YOU INTO SOUP!"

And with that they ran off after him.

Max looked at Calvin and Hobbes. "Um, are you going to help them?" he asked.

"Why should we?" Calvin said, snobbishly.

"Maybe if we help them, they'll let us into the club." Hobbes suggested.

Before Calvin could reply, WG ran back, and then dragged them away.

"…Plus I don't think we have much of a choice."

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Inside the Club, Mickey was on stage preparing for the next Cartoon.

"Alright everyone, put your hands, Tentacles, Hooves Paws, and Feet together it's time for a another Cartoo-"

"HAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAH!"

"OUT OF THE WAY BOSS!"

SMACK!

Mickey stumbled up after getting run over by WG, dragging Fanatic.

"uhh, give it up for a Donald Cartoon." He then passed out on the stage.

"HIT IT HORACE!" Minnie yelled as she ran to drag Mickey off stage.

Up in the Sound booth, Horace, rolled up his sleeve.

"HORACE PPPPUUUUUNNNCH!", Yelled out the Projector as he punched it, causing a giant flash of light, as the Cartoon played on the screen.

Minnie dragged Mickey backstage, as Shelby ran past.

…Followed by WG, who had just let go of Fanatic.

"GET BACK HERE!" She called out.

Fanatic walked up to Minnie.

Minnie looked at him. "Let me Guess, Mrs. Turtle didn't want to hire a babysitter again?"

"Yep." Fanatic said, rubbing his head.

"And what doesn't/ does want to happen to Shelby this time?"

"Get injured."

Donald, who had been watching sighed. "Phew, at least it's not me this time."

"OUTTA THE WAY DONALD!"

CRASH!

"AHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHH A"

Donald now lay on the Floor, flatter than Jeff Globules acting.

"Oh phooey, spoke too soon."

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Calvin and Hobbes chased Shelby into the kitchen, where they had seen him coming.

"Come on Shelby where are you, Mommy's going to be upset if you get hurt, and then we're going to get hurt worse if she hurts the authors," Calvin whispered.

"Yeah, kid… it ain't worth the suicidal stunts- take it from a tiger who gets dragged into them." Hobbes said.

Calvin gave him a look. "What's THAT supposed to mean?!"

Hobbes looked up, and then saw Shelby standing on a cabinet, about to jump into a sink, that was full of Knives. "GAH! THERE HE IS!"

Calvin gasped, and then almost tore his own face off as he jumped.

"HA HA HA HA HA!" Shelby laughed.

Calvin Dove forward, and then jumped onto the counter, butt landing in the sink. His hands raised out to catch Shelby, who landed safely in Hobbes arms as the tiger ran next to the sink, having stretched them over the sink so to avoid getting stabbified. "Whew! That was close."

Shelby laughed and then looked at Calvin, a look of sheer pain on his face. He then laughed, and then hopped out of Hobbes' hands and then took off running again.

"I hate that kid." Calvin said through his teeth, as he ran off after him, at the same time pulling knives out of his…you know what. "…just end scene and go to the next.. END SCENE DANG IT!"

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Shelby laughed as he ran up the stairs and to the catwalks above the club. He looked down and saw the tables with toon characters.

HE then climbed u onto the railings and then began to saw back and Forth.

WG, ran up onto the catwalks which began to shake. She gasped as Shelby began to act like he was going to fall.

"AH, NO DON'T!" She cried running toward him.

Shelby jumped off, and WG jumped to grab him, only then Noticing WHAT side he jumped onto, and she went sailing over the railing.

She looked back at Shelby who waved and then laughed. "I HATE YOU!" She yelled as she crashed into a table.

She looked up and saw Mrs. Turtle.

"And how is my little baby doing?"

"Just Fine, Mrs. T, I'm just handling a little Security Problem., that's all."

"WHO CARES ABOUT THE SECURITY GET BACK TO MY BABY OR ELSE!"

WG was then blown onstage by the scream.

She looked at the Audience, and then chuckled weakly.

"Um… AND NOW A GOOFY CARTOON!" And then she ran off stage.

Minnie, who was still trying to Revive Mickey yelled out, "HORACE!"

WG charged backstage, and then saw, much to her dismay, Shelby….about to stick a fork into an electrical socket.

"GET AWAY FROM THAT YOU STUPID LITTLE REPTILE!" She yelled out, right as she grabbed the fork and then shoved it into the socket.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!" WG screamed and lit up like a Christmas Tree on fire.

"AHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHA!" Shelby laughed, and then proceeded to grab two wires out of the nearest Power box.

As WG stopped being electrified she groaned, and Fanatic ran over. "The ol' fork in the electric socket gag again?" he asked.

"Just… go… get… that…. kid…" WG growled, standing up. "I gotta go chip off my burnt skin."

Fanatic turned to look at the reader. "I know what's going to happen, and you know what's going to happen, but if I don't do this he will harm himself… and it would kill the slapstick."

He ran onto the roof, and found Shelby, about to jump off the building. He turned and then waved Bye Bye.

Fanatic sighed, and then ran towards him, and then… as expected, he stepped aside and he went sailing over the edge.

"Thank goodness I am on Cartoon Logic!" Fanatic yelled out, as he hit the pavement, with enough force to actually cause some of it to collapse into the sewers.

"HAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAH!"

Fanatic got up, and then stormed into the building. Max watched him go in, and blinked. "I should help, but my insurance wouldn't cover it." he said to the reader.

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Shelby ran into the club itself, and then hid under a table, where Mulan and Sheng were sitting.

Mulan, feeling Shelby on her foot, looked under the table, just as Calvin crashed into her foot.

"AH!" Mulan yelled out, drawing out her feet. Calvin looked up at her. "Sorry." And then he saw Shelby, going onto captain Hook's seat, and then sitting next to his side.

"Ah Mr. Smee, are the crew behaving themselves, as to not break any rules?" He said Nervously.

"Oh course captain, no rule breaking here." Smee said.

"Excellent, with any luck we shalt have to put up with any funny goings on with those two "Security Guards" as Mickey calls them."

He said this, right as Hobbes crashed into his side.

"AH SMEE, A TIGER IS TRYING TO KILL ME! SAVE ME SMEE!"

Everyone looked towards both Raja and Sher Kahn "Don't look at us!" Sher Kahn snapped.

"Sorry, Mr. Hook." Hobbes said

"SORRY? SORRY!? You just VIOLATED MY PERIMETER I SHOULD CUT YOU DOWN TO SIZE!"

HE then drew his sword and then pointed it at Hobbe's throat.

Calvin then popped up. "HEY, LOOK! Jack Sparrow is winning the 'Greatest Pirate Of All Time' award!" he shouted, pointing in some random direction.

"WHAT?!" Captain Hook turned, giving the two cartoons a chance to amscray.

They checked, under Chernaboug's foot, inside Gaston's gun, King Triton's beard, The Reluctant Dragon's mouth, Under Ursula's tentacles, Behind, under and over, ALL 101 Dalmatians, Under Giselle's Wedding Dress (the thing could hold a circus) In Ralph's fist, Calhoun's blaster, Simba's mane, Genie's lamp, Jafar's hat, The Mad Hatters hat, one of Belle's books, inside the Beast's fur and even checked the Seven Dwarfs for an answer.

"WHERE IN THE WORLD IS HE!?" Calvin shouted.

"Where is who?"

Calvin looked and saw that he had been standing right next to Mrs. Turtle. "Oh, um Fanatic's pet cat Tiger, got lost. Hobbes and I are just looking for him."

"Ah… and do you know how well a job those security authors are doing with Shelby?"

"Um, we're too busy looking for the cat." Hobbes said meekly.

"WHO CARES ABOUT THE CAT MAKE SURE MY BABY IS SAFE!"

Calvin and Hobbes were blown clear…. Into a brick wall.

"HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHHAH AHAHHAHAHHAHHAHAHAHH!"

"GET BACK HERE!" Calvin shouted, and he and Hobbes pulled themselves off the wall and raced after the little shelled spawn of Hades.

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Shelby, ran into the Prop basement, with WG and Fanatic following behind him.

"Come on Baby Shelby, Mommy will KILL us if this continues!" Fanatic called.

Shelby just laughed, and then he ran through the Wardrobes, and WG still ran after him, each time ending up in some Characters outfit.

Shelby, looked like a Monkey, and WG was dressed up like Jane, as they through a Tarzan set.

Another Wardrobe Run, she ended up looking like Magica, while Shelby looked like Mr. Poe.

Jessie, and Buzz, Kanga and Roo, Calhoun and Fix it Felix, Princess Lea, and Darth Vader, Darkwing and Gosalyn, Kim and Rufus, and so on and So Forth.

Soon, Shelby, who looked like some Weird Mix Between Piglet, Roo, Vader, Felix and a Monkey, stood atop a cliff of Assorted Props.

He looked down, and then grinned. He turned around and then saw WG, who looked like a strange Mix of All the Disney Princesses, Jane, Darkwing, Magica, Kim, as well has holding Jafar's Snake Staff Replica, running toward him.

"Hold it, let me take a picture!" Fanatic exclaimed, holding up his cell phone. The two paused, smiling, and he clicked a picture.

"Come on Shelby, Don't jump off the cliff, don't!" She cried out.

Shelby grinned at her and then jumped.

"NO!" Both yelled, and ran and leapt… only to see that he had grabbed onto a crate, safely, hanging on.

"Well, what am I falling into this time?" Fanatic asked. They looked down and saw…all the fireworks ever used by the Disney Parks.

"I REALLY HATE THAT BRAT!" WG yelled.

"DITTO!" Fanatic screamed.

BOOM!"

Shelby stood atop the "cliff" And Saluted like an American Soldier at the site of the Fireworks.

They all went off in bright Colors, that lit up the prop room beautifully.

WG, climbed back up the cliff, clothes shredded and Brunt, her Hair was charred black, and she was Covered in ash. Fanatic looked just the same.

Calvin and Hobbes came running in. "What smells like toast?" Hobbes asked.

"Drop dead, Hobbes." WG sneered.

"How the heck are we going to get that kid to behave?! He's uncontrollable!" Fanatic whined.

"Yeah, he's more trouble than I am- and that's really saying something!" Calvin added.

"I think I have a way." Hobbes said, then walked over to Baby Shelby, who was readying a crate of explosives. "Ahem."

Shelby looked at him.

"How about a deal, Shelby? You behave, and you can go riding downhill in a wagon with Calvin all summer, and you can steer him off a cliff."

"WHAT?!" Calvin shouted.

Shelby rubbed his chin, mockingly considering it.

Hobbes held up a giant lollipop. "I'll give you candy, too."

"Ha ha ha!" Shelby laughed, then jumped into the tiger's arms.

"See? Simple."

The two authors and Calvin stared, then collapsed.

Hobbes sighed. "Some people just can't handle kids."

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Later Mrs. Turtle had come backstage to collect her son.

"WHERE IS HE!?" She yelled.

Max raised his arms up. "In My defense, you need to hire an actual babysitter!" he whimpered.

Just then, the Prop room door burst open, and our heroes trudged out, Hobbes carrying baby Shelby, who was unharmed.

But Fanatic, WG, and Calvin looked like a mess, as stated before, they were burnt, and charred, covered in bandages, one each of their eyes was black, their hands had a large amount of Paper cuts on them, and for some reason an entire tree was in Calvin's hair…somehow.

"OH MY LITTLE BABY THNAK GOODNESS YOUR ALRIGHT!" Mrs. Tuttle Cried happily.

They collapsed onto the ground. Again.

"Oh thank you for taking care of my baby so well, in fact I'm going to make you his official baby sitter every time I come here!"

Wg looked up, her eyes wider than the moon. "Do we at least get paid?" she asked.

"NO, BABYSITTERS DO NOT NEEED MONEY THEY SHOULD FEEL GOOD JUST FOR DOING A GOOD JOB!"

"Tell that to Rosalyn," Calvin scoffed.

And with that Mrs. Turtle left the Club.

WG's right eye began twitching. And then her face went red.

"Uh, oh… I've seen her this way when her sister ticked her off after babysitting!" Hobbes yelped.

"Oh GOSH, HIT THE DECK!" Yelled Fanatic, who then ran into a closet.

Mickey's eyes went wide, and then he dragged Minnie off to his dressing room.

They shut the door just in time.

( _a/n: We had to censor out my outburst because it included a lot of naughty language.)_

Outside the Club, the glass in the doors shattered, and they fell down, the tables tipped over inside the club, the screen cracked, doors were blown apart, the wall paper cracked and peeled, the pipes burst, and Goofy fell into the Fanatic shaped hole… again

Fanatic, Mickey and Minnie stared at the devastation that had been caused, and then they dare to look at WG.

The area around her had no color whatsoever, it had all been scared away by her scream, and what was left was a cracked damaged mass of Black and White. Calvin and Hobbes were imprinted into the wall, Hobbes' stripes blown off and Calvin in his underwear.

WG still looked the same as before, except now she had calmed down.

"If anyone needs me, I'm going to be napping." The authoress sighed.

And with that she trudged away.

Daisy walked in. "What the heck Happened Mickey, it looks like a nuclear scream bomb went off, and the Magic Mirror's glass is cracked!”

"Daisy, from now on, put in regulations that parents who bring their own children into the club are to keep an eye on them at ALL TIMES… and unattended children will be sent to Never Land." Mickey groaned, then went back to the stage.

"Why?"

"Lets just say… babysitting is NOT AN OPTION FOR A SECURITY GUARD'S JOB!" Fanatic shouted, then walked off. "I'm going to go take a nap too. Hold my calls."

"…can we come into the club since we were a big help?" Hobbes asked.

"Well… just for tonight, just to pay you back for all you've gone through."

Calvin and Hobbes whooped and ran in. "At last, we're finally going to hang out in the-" Calvin began.

"Thanks for coming everybody! See you again next week!" Mickey announced, then the clubs lights went out, signifying it was closed.

Calvin's eyes went wide, and Hobbes gulped. "Wuh-oh, not again!" he said, then grabbed Calvin and put him inside a sound-sealed glass dome.

From the way the six-year-old was thrashing and yelling, Hobbes should be given a Medal of Honor for sparing everyone from another conniption explosion.

Once Calvin had calmed down, Hobbes took him out. "C'mon, bud, lets go home. We'll try again next week."

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"Are you sure he will be safe in here?" Mrs. Turtle asked a couple days later. They were all standing outside a building across the street from the club, titled 'Neverland Play House, Open 24 Hours.'

"Of Course Mrs. Turtle just drop him into the slide, and he will go right to the play area- our kiddy-club is the safest place around." Daisy assured.

Mrs. Turtle, put Shelby in the slide, and he slid into the play area. "Oh thank you, now I don't have to worry about other people taking care of him."

If looks could kill she would have been killed by Donald, Fanatic and WG.

"Well," Daisy sighed. "It looks like we will have no more troubles with Shelby."

"Thank goodness." Fanatic, WG and Donald said, right as Shelby reveled that he had crawled up the slide, and was now running off into the club!

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHHAH!" He laughed as he ran off.

Everyone gaped, then slapped their foreheads. "Anyone got the number for Child Services?" WG asked.

"Should we go after him? I mean, Mrs. Turtle will kill us!" Fanatic stammered.

"Nah… all children are under the responsibility of the owners of THIS place,"

Right as she said that, the cast of Jimmy Two-Shoes came running out. "Ah, man! I TOLD you guys running a 24-Hour daycare was a stupid idea!" Heloise snapped.

"Well, don't just stand there, we've got to stop that kid before his mom finds out!" Jimmy exclaimed. "Lets go!"

"Can't we get a snack first?" Beezy asked, and Heloise dragged him off.

Everyone looked at WG. "Meh. Wanted to give them a cameo. Lets go eat." she said, then skipped off (omg it's the apocalypse, she's skipping! aaaggh!)

They all shrugged. Baby Shelby then popped up and slapped a sticker on the screen that said:

END.

0O0O0O0O0O0O0O0

**A/N: *No authors or cameos were harmed during the making of this fic… but if you're wondering why Turtle Soup is on the menu, don't think too hard***

**Review. Flame and you experience a fate worse than death- in other words, babysitting Shelby.**


	5. The One with the Chicken

**GEEZ, sorry for the long wait, guys! But, here's the new chapter of Security Authors! And with April Fool's Day not too far off, here's an episode full of random laughs for you all.**

**Disclaimer: CONFOUND IT! WE STILL DON'T OWN ANYTHING! GAAAAHHHH!**

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

It was yet ANOTHER typical night at the House of Mouse- Guests came, Mickey hosted a few cartoons, O'Maly and the Ally Cats failed to show up again, and Goofy goofed up during his shift again, this time spilling water on Hades' head when he was flirting with Maleficent, putting out that flame of hair of his and making him look ridiculous in front of the villainess.

With our two security authors, everything was going well… though WG was still sore from the last chapter, which was undergoing an immediate rewrite. "Oh c'mon, WG, watching Baby Shelby on your own wasn't that bad, was it?" Fanatic asked.

WG gripped him by the throat. "You'll find out once YOU participate!" she snarled.

Fanatic gulped. "But… won't the readers who haven't read it yet get confused after reading this?"

"They'll just have to deal with it- half of this plot is confusing anyway."

"Eh, true. Speaking of which, what's in store for everyone in this chapter? (Please don't let it be Baby Shelby, please don't let it be Baby Shelby…)"

"Ah, don't worry about it, Fanatic- I convinced Mrs. Turtle that spending lots of time with her child was required in parenthood in order for them to grow up to be successful and caring."

"And she believed it?"

"Yep. I used Max as an example of such parenting from Goofy- who we all can agree is one of the best fathers in the cartoon world. …And when that didn't work, I showed her an example of what happens when parents don't spend enough time with their kids."

"What example was that?"

"Calvin."

"HEY!" came an offensive shout from a certain comic-character. "I RESENT THAT!"

"PIPE DOWN, CALVIN! YOU'RE NOT IN THIS CHAPTER!"

"Why not?" Fanatic asked.

"Oh the script called for a new set of cameos from different cartoon industries."

Fanatic gasped excitedly. "You mean we finally got the rights to include the Marvel Avengers in our story?"

WG looked at him weird. "No… but I'm still talking to my agent about it."

Fanatic arched an eyebrow. "Who's your agent?"

(Quick glimpse of the authoress' kitty sitting on a desk wearing a tie, licking her paws while the phones are ringing)

He slapped his forehead. "I'm sorry I asked."

"Yeah? Who's YOUR agent?" WG scoffed.

(We get a view of the co-author's kitty sitting at a desk, sleeping while the phones are ringing)

Fanatic blinked. "Nevermind." he said quickly. "So… when's the plot going to begin?"

"You know the story." WG answered sighing… while a chicken was walking by. "We spend the time making up filler with one-liners that people will probably use themselves, until something… did a chicken just walk into the club?"

Fanatic looked over, seeing that, indeed, a chicken was walking in, passing Donald. "Must be tonight's dinner special."

"C'mon, we'd better grab it," They ran inside, seeing that the chicken was sitting on Daisy's desk, as she was looking through her autograph book, while Donald was trying to learn how to work a touch-screen iphone.

"Darn these things…" Donald grumbled, trying to put in numbers for his contact list, but instead kept pulling up annoying apps that were all over the screen. "Grrrr!"

"Hey, someone grab that chicken!" Fanatic called.

Daisy was still looking over the list of autographs she had received since the club opened. "Chicken? What chicken?" she asked.

"That chicken right on the desk!" WG said.

Donald and Daisy looked… but the chicken had disappeared without a trace. The two ducks arched eyebrows at the two authors. "Are you guys crazy? There's no chicken here!" Donald scoffed, then went back to working with his impossible phone.

"It must have wandered into the club,"

"I'll check around the dining area. You check the kitchen," Fanatic ordered.

"Oh, no way man! The last time I entered the kitchen, I got stabbed in the rear with knives, and the time before that, a snotty princess knock-off poured boiling water on my face, and the time before THAT, the chef whacked me with a frying pan! (though that was because I was trying to sneak some scones into my pockets)… Anyway, I'LL check the dining area, and YOU can check the kitchen!"

"Girl, please! Every time you're out in the dining area, you go all fan-crazy! …Or did you FORGET the night Jim Hawkins visited and you took his solar-surfer for a joyride?"

"Hey, he knows me personally!"

"…that would explain the restraining order against you," Daisy whispered.

"Alright, alright, alright, how about if we BOTH check the dining area?" WG suggested.

"Okay!" Fanatic agreed, and they rushed off.

"Wait, who's going to be guarding the door?!" Donald demanded.

"Don't worry, we've got it covered!"

(Two cardboard copies of WG and Fanatic are standing out front… one of them falls over.)

Daisy let out a heavy sigh while Donald only face-palmed, shaking his head. "Oh brother…" he muttered.

What no one noticed were three figures tip-toeing quickly into the club… BUT more on that later!

0o0o0o0o0o0

Through the vision of a pair of binoculars, we see a view of the dining area. "Anything yet?"

"I see Cruella measuring Scar for size… Bernard and Bianca are discussing their engagement with the mice from Cinderella… Shanti and Tiger Lilly looking at a magazine issue featuring the hottest Disney guys- HOLD IT! 'Aladdin no longer number one, replaced by Flynn Ryder'?! What kind of crap is that?!"

"Wherever Girl, FOCUS!"

"Oh, sorry… wait, I see it!" WG lowered her hands… which she was holding up like a pair of binoculars… and pointed ahead. "Over there, by Gaston's table!"

"Lets go!"

The chicken, indeed, was sitting at Gaston's table, pecking at some crackers that were placed by a large bowl of soup- oh you can tell where THIS will lead. "Yes, but it's true- no one can hunt like Gast-" the villain was boasting to the triplets that constantly surrounded him- with his nose high in the air proudly and the girls keeping their gazes on him, none of them noticed the chicken.

*CRASH! SPLOOSH!*

The authors had dove, trying to grab the chicken… but only ended up crashing on the table, splashing soup in Gaston's face. The chicken, who landed on the floor, only shook its feathers, then walked away. "What is the meaning of this?!"

"Sorry, we're chasing after that chicken!" Fanatic answered, pointing to where the chicken last was, but once again disappeared.

"Are you crazy?!" One of the triplets snapped.

"There is no chicken here!" The second added.

"He's still gorgeous…" The third swooned, referring to Gaston.

"C'mon, it couldn't have gotten far!" WG said, and they took off.

Fanatic returned. "By the way, you have something on your face," he told Gaston, who only fumed.

"No one's going to kill those authors like Gaston!" The villain snarled, grabbing his gun and taking aim… but when he squeezed the trigger, it jammed. "Huh?"

Like your basic idiot, he looked into the barrel of the gun…

*BOOM!*

*SPLOT!*

…and out a pie in his face. Behind the booth, three silhouettes snickered, then snuck off.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Fanatic looked out from behind a door to the left, while WG looked out one to the right, and both went back in.

Fanatic then popped up from behind a crate while WG peeked out from a cardboard box, and both ducked back down.

WG rose out from a trap door, while Fanatic lowered himself upside-down from the ceiling… and fell to the floor with a thud. "Ow."

"What are we doing backstage, again?" WG asked.

"…filler." Fanatic answered, then pointed ahead. "HEY! There's the chicken, on stage!"

The chicken stood on stage- and surprisingly NO ONE noticed- just minding its own business.

They ran out, just as Mickey was stepping on… but WG tripped over a wire (typical) and fell in front of Fanatic, who tripped over her and both of them tumbled and rolled across the stage, crashing into Hewey, Dewey, and Louie's band equipment. "Uh… and now a Donald cartoon!" he announced, then stormed over to the authors. "What are you guys doing?!"

"There's a chicken loose in the club, it's on the stage!" WG answered, pointing over at the stage… but ONCE AGAIN the chicken had vanished!

"Are you crazy?! There isn't a chicken here! Now fix up this mess and get back to guarding the door- who knows what kind of kooks have snuck in!"

The two authors stood up. "The only thing that's gotten past us was that chicken. We'd better catch it before it makes us cause any more trouble!" Fanatic scoffed, brushing himself off.

"Yeah… we can get ourselves into trouble just fine," WG added, setting the drums back up, then the two authors went back to chicken-chasing.

One of the three figures rose up from behind the drums, then did that 'tiddy-boom' skit.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

All the staff gathered backstage minutes later in an important meeting. "Mickey, news on the street is that some hi-jinx have been going on!" Clarabelle stated. "Gaston was pied in the face, someone erased all 101 Dalmatians of their spots, put Sher Kahn's stripes on Mufasa, switched Jim Hawkins' solar surfer with Aladdin's flying carpet, snuck one of Yzma's animal potions into Grumpy's drink and made a monkey out of him, and took the headless horseman's head and replaced it with Cinderella's pumpkin!"

(We get a view of Gaston with pie-cream still on his face, 101 pure-white Dalmatians, Mufasa with tiger-stripes sitting beside a blank-orange Sher Kahn, Jim and Aladdin in crashed-positions with Carpet and a solar surfer beside them, a Grumpy-looking ape, and a regular pumpkin on the Headless Horseman's head- which suddenly turned into a carriage, crushing him).

"And someone raided all the desserts in the kitchen!" Goofy added.

"And have been messing with our instruments!" Hewey, Dewey, and Louie snapped.

"And doodled all over my autograph book!" Daisy growled, holding up her autograph book which was full of goofy-looking drawings.

"Who could be doing all of this?!" Minnie asked.

"A better question is, how did they get past those security guards?" Donald questioned.

"Better yet, how did they get past the security guards?" Goofy pondered, scratching his head.

"That's what I just said!"

"Where ARE Fanatic and WG, anyway?" Max demanded.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

_Meanwhile in the basement…_

"Marco!" WG called.

"Polo!" Fanatic responded, a way's off.

"Marco!"

"Polo!"

"Cluck!" went the chicken.

"THERE!" The two authors exclaimed, leaping to where the chicken was at-

*KONK!*

…their heads colliding when the chicken hopped down off the crate it was on, disappearing once again.

"Okay… time for plan 'B'…" Fanatic groaned.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Minutes later back upstairs, after creating a make-shift female chicken out of toilet paper, a waffle-cone, a feather-duster, and a pair of forks. The chicken walked by, and upon seeing there was a female chicken present…

…it kept on walking.

"Um, dude? I think the chicken is a female," WG said.

Fanatic slapped his forehead. "I knew I should have kept those blueprints for that make-shift rooster design!" he grumbled.

Mickey and Minnie came running up just then. "THERE you are! You guys had better get to work- someone, or something, has snuck into the club and is causing havoc!" Minnie ordered. "What have you been doing all night?!"

"Trying to catch that-" WG began to say, but paused, realizing the running gag. "Never mind. We're on it, Minnie! Just tell us what we're up against!"

"Whoever's been throwing pies, whistling at the Disney princesses, and doing all these insane tricks!"

The authors rubbed their chins, considering all these options… and the authoress gasped. "I think I know who it is!"

"The random chicken will have to wait!" Fanatic declared, and the authors got down to business.

"The random what?" Minnie questioned.

"Don't ask," Micky sighed.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

The three silhouettes were up in the rafters, preparing to drop a giant water-balloon on the Firebird…

"(ahem)" came a voice, and they looked over… seeing an incredible attractive harem girl with a veil over her face.

Two of the figures' tongues dropped out, their hearts pounded against their chests, and their eyeballs did flips. "Hel-LO nurse!" they exclaimed.

"Boys. Go fig," the third one sighed… then noticed a studly boy in a leather jacket, jeans, with a cap pulled over his face, standing next to the girl. "Hel-LO nurse!"

They all leaped-

*SLAM!*

The boy and girl- who were obviously WG and Fanatic in crafty disguises- slammed a crate over the three figures, then launched it out of the club and towards another studio. "Well, that oughtta keep them out for a while," Fanatic said, taking off the harem veil.

"Yeah. They weren't supposed to make a cameo until the end of the season," WG added, adjusting the leather jacket. "…Well, I'd better give Jim's outfit back to him. Any fan-girls hear he's standing around in his underwear, and we'll have to put up one heck of a fight to keep them out."

"Right, and I'd better put this outfit back in Jasmine's closet before she notices it's missing," Fanatic then paused. "Waaaaaaiiiiiiiiit a minute, WG… how come I had to dress up like a girl and you dressed up as a boy?!"

"Comedic twist?" WG shrugged.

"Oh. Okay. Speaking of comedic twists, here's another one…" Fanatic yanked a rope.

*WHAM!* an anvil fell on WG.

"…should've seen that coming…" WG groaned.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

After the club closed and the guests started to leave, the staff met up by the door. "So, who were those pranksters, anyway?" Daisy asked.

"That's for us and the reader to know, and you guys to not find out until the end of the season," WG answered, and everyone shook their heads.

"Well, see you guys next week," Fanatic said as he and WG began to walk out…

The chicken following them. This time, the staff noticed it. "Hey! Where'd that chicken come from?" Mickey asked.

Fanatic and WG looked behind them, just as the chicken walked passed them and out the door, looked at each other, and scratched their heads. "Are you guys crazy?" Fanatic scoffed.

"There's no chicken around here," WG answered.

With that, they left… leaving the others puzzled.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

**A/N: *cluck***


	6. WG The Host? (Part One!)

**We still own nothing. On with the randomness!**

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

WG sighed as she stared at the sunset as night began to fall.

"Another day has passed us yet again, and now night has befallen us once more; A wondrous night as it usually is, as I now work at this workplace; the House of Mouse is where my paycheck resides, and it is here that I say farewell day, and hello night."

She looked over at Fanatic, who, along with Max, help up scorecards of 10's.

"Another great poem WG, at this rate you could get on stage at the club!" Max said.

WG's face turned red. "Ah come on guys. You know how well I do onstage- I panic without the right amount of rehearsal, not to mention I'm afraid of making an idiot of myself- like what always happens."

"Oh come on, so it's a bunch of Toons, what is the worst thing that can happen if you mess up?" Fanatic asked.

“That depends, remember YOUR attempt to provide entertainment a few nights ago?" Max asked. "If I remember, you did the Tapioca Dance… which involved you dancing in tapioca, while covered in cheese."

"HEY IT GOT THEM LAUGHING!" Fanatic retorted.

"No, everyone either passed out, went into shock, or vomited, the only ones who laughed was the March Hare and Mad Hatter… but that's only because they LAUGH AT EVERYTHING!"

"It's true Fantic, watch," WG said. "HEY GUYS," ,she shouted out to the two insane Wonderland characters.

"Yes?" Hatter asked, pouring some tea into a cup full of holes, having it pour through the holes and into several tiny cups beneath it.

"Waffles."

"HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAAH!" Hatter and the Hare guffawed.

"See Fantaic?" Max asked.

Fanatic only rolled his eyes.

x0x

Inside the club, everyone was seated and ready for the show to start, as Mike started it off.

"Get ready folks, because here he comes, the biggest eared, most famous mouse of all, MICKEY MOUSE!"

"Ha ha, hey there everyone, we've got a great show planned tonight, But first, here is a demonstration from our very own, Ludwig von-"

Suddenly, Gyro Gearloose ran on stage, and then whispered something into Mickey's ear.

Mickey's eyes went wide, and his jaw dropped. "Um sorry folks, it appears that Ludwig was just involved in an accident involving his piano, so it appears that he has sent Gyro in his place, so give it up for GYRO GEARLOOSE!"

The crowed, clapped awkwardly, at the sight of Gyro, walking on stage, with a large cylinder shaped machine, with a keyboard coming out of the right side.

"Hello everybody, the name's Gyro, and tonight I have a really great invention to show you, my teleporter device! Observe," he said. He then set an apple into the Machine. "I place the apple here into he teleporter, and then I come over here and type in where I want to send it."

He typed something into the Keyboard, and then in a flash of light, the apple was gone, and then in a flash it reappeared, on the wicked Queens table.

She looked at it. "If this is a joke, it's not funny." she sneered.

Gyro, then smiled as the other toons cheered that his machine worked. "And now, I would like a volunteer from the audience to test it on themselves."

At that moment the whole club went silent.

Gyro sighed, "Aw come on everyone, I have teleported other people before, Scrooge to his Money Bin, Launchpad to a plane, Huey, Duey and Luey to a Jr. Woodchucks meeting,"

Still no one was willing to go up and then Mickey stepped up to the Machine.

"Aw shucks Gyrro, I'll try it out for ya!" the mouse offered.

"Oh thank you Mickey you are a true friend." Gyro said, smiling.

Mickey then stepped into the teleporter, and then he stood still.

"Alright Gyro, beam me up somewhere,." Mickey waited, but nothing happened. "um Gyro?"

Outside, Gyro was now in a panic. He had tried setting it to Mickey's Dressing room, but it had suddenly set itself to Mexico, and he couldn't set the coordinates back! "MICKEY GET OUT, YOU'RE GOING TO MEXICO!" Gyro yelled out.

Before Mickey could say anything, there was a bright flash of light, and then suddenly, Mickey Mouse was gone from the teleporter!

Everyone gasped in shock, and Gyro frantically tried to recall Mickey back, but nothing was working. “Um, well… we’ll get Mickey back soon! For now, um--- maybe a cartoon?” he stammered.

Minnie gasped, and then turned around into her Walkie-Talkie. "HORACE!" she yelled.

Up in the sound booth, Horace hit the projector with a mallet, and then a Daisy Duck Cartoon began to Play

0o0o0o0o0

Gyro stood backstage, with Minnie, Donald, Daisy, Goofy, WG and Fanatic looking over his teleporter."I just don't know what went wrong guys. really, I tested it out a few times just today." the inventor told them.

Fanatic poked around the Machine, looking for anything that could have caused the machine to go haywire like it did.

He looked at the Keyboard and then, he saw that- attached to the keyboard-there was…

"Nachos?" he inquired as he peeled them off of the bottom of the keyboard. He looked at the nachos (which had began to grow blue-white-and-green mold on the cheese and chips) and felt like vomiting.

"GYRO, how long have these been here?" WG grimaced.

Gyro walked around and gasped. "I've been looking for those for over a week!" he exclaimed.

"What do we do, we can't have a club without a host!" Minnie cried. "We need a host, and Daisy can't do it because we made her promise she wouldn't!"

"Hey," Daisy said. "I didn't do THAT bad of a job!"

Minnie gave her a blank stare. "YOU BLEW THE SIGN OFF AND IT FELL INTO OHIO!"

"If you want it, it's in my basement." Fanatic replied. He then looked at WG. "Maybe WG can host it."

Donald did a spit-take. "WHAT?!" he cried.

"I'm with the duck- WHAT!?" She cried, jumping ten feet.

"Sure, you do a fine sonnet and singing voice, and you’re a comedy genius!" Fanatic complimented.

"ARE YOU FRICKIN' KIDDING ME?! I FLUNKED CHOIR AFTER MAKING THE TEACHER'S EARS EXPLODE AND LAST TIME I TRIED STAND-UP COMEDY, THE MANAGER WILLINGLY SET FIRE TO THE STAGE JUST TO MAKE SURE I DIDN'T CRACK A SINGLE JOKE AGAIN!"

"Says the girl who had several people laughing with her 'Invading Treasure Planet', 'Pugs Gets Prankified', and every [deleted] Calvin and Hobbes story she's ever written, including the Wal-Mart one."

WG arched an eyebrow. "…Are you trying to hint at something?"

Fanatic hid several documents with saved files of the Calvin and Hobbes stories behind his back, innocently rolling his eyes. "Maaaaaaayyyybee."

Everyone looked at Fanatic and then they all turned back to WG. "1,000 ways to get kicked out of Wal-Mart?" Minnie guessed.

"It's how I meet Fanatic in the first place, he gave me the idea, long story… oh, wait, that wasn't long at all." WG replied.

Fanatic grinned, "And look where it got you now WG," he said grinning.

WG gave him a deadpanned look. "Yeah- having to keep up with my stories, all the while keeping a bunch of crackpots out of the club, and dealing with stress without the help of meds. Somebody call the 'Fun' police,"

A bunch of cops ran up just then, having the word 'Fun' printed on their uniforms. "You call us, sir?" one of them asked.

"I WAS BEING SARCASTIC!"

The cop rolled his eyes. "Darn it. C'mon boys, another false-alarm," they took off, grumbling.

"I think you're suffering from lack of self-esteem. This might help with it!" Fanatic said.

"Dude, my self-esteem isn't going to improve until someone straps Baby Shelby to a rocket, and I get the chance to pound you into the concrete for writing the first draft of that chapter." WG sneered.

Fanatic cringed. "Alright, that wasn't very nice."

"Neither was that draft!"

"So it's alright for YOU to write a story about tormenting Puggsy, but one little chapter about you getting harassed isn't?"

"That's different- the loudmouth deserves it!"

"Do not!" came an off-screen shout from a certain loudmouth.

"SHUT UP, PUGS! YOU'RE NOT IN THIS STORY!" WG then developed a mischievous grin. "…yet."

"See? SEE?! You're plotting something nasty right now!" Fanatic pointed out.

"Uh, guys? Can we get back to the PLOT, please?" Daisy asked.

"Yeah, in case you haven't noticed, we still need a host for the show!" Minnie added.

Fanatic turned back to WG. "C'mon, WG! Just do it- it'll be fun… and I won't stop bugging you until you do."

"FINE." WG snarled. "But I'd better get a raise for all this!"

Minnie smiled at her. "Of course. Mickey would probably give you anything you want for this!" she said.

"Extra pay, a free all expense-paid trip to Bavaria, fifty gallons of grape soda, and an official Fangface DVD signed by the cast?"

"OH! OH! And I want to direct the next Transformers/Beast Wars movie with a starring role, and get my collection signed by all the cast of the original series, and get to host a review with the Nostalgia Critic!" Fanatic added excitedly.

Minnie blinked. "Um… yes… whatever you say."

"WE'LL DO IT!" The two authors exclaimed.

"Getting back on topic," Fanatic said. "Gyro can you get the teleporter working?"

Gyro looked up. "The mold has gotten into the circuits, so it will take a while for me to get it running again- that and I think I may have a slight bowel problem…"

"Why…?" WG asked, then noticed the nachos were missing. "Ew, Gyro tell me you didn't…"

He then ran off towards the bathroom, at the speed of light. "EXCUSE ME!"

WG face-palmed. "I can expect something like this from Beezy, but Gyro?!"

"Okay then," Fanatic said. He then pulled out a Walkie Talkie. "Hunter Team, this is Leader, come in Hunter team."

A robotic voice came out of the other end, "This in Hunter Team member Road Hazard, what do you need leader?"

"Fire up the space bridge, me and Minnie Mouse need to go to Mexico to retrieve Mickey Mouse, do you copy?"

"I Copy Leader, I will pick up in five minutes."

Fanatic turned to Minnie, who glared at him. "Okay WHAT WAS THAT!? Why rope me into this?" she demanded.

"AND I THOUGHT YOU WERE GOING TO HELP ME HOST!" WG snapped.

"Because Mickey's your boyfriend, Minnie. And it'll take an Author to get Mickey back in a flash." Daisy said, pushing Minnie and Fanatic over to the door, "Now go out and retrieve OUR MOUSE!"

"Wait-" Minnie tried to say.

*SLAM!*

Daisy slammed the door shut and then ran over to WG, "So, I was thinking FASHION SHOW hosted by WG, what do you think?"

WG gave her a glare. "I'd rather chug cyanide." she groused.

Daisy cringed. "I'll take that as a 'no'…"

Donald only face-palmed. "This isn't going to end well…" he muttered.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Fanatic and Minnie, stood outside with Max, who was looking down the street with them.

"So, what are we looking for again?" Max asked.

"An Orange Porsche with hazard colored stripes running the length of the body, and a black sideskirt."Fanatic said.

Max and Minnie looked at him. "Well that's specific." Minnie said.

Just then, a Porsche with that exact same coloration drove up to them, with an Autobot insignia on it's hood but with the words, 'Universal Squad 1' in gold letters under it.

"Road Hazard reporting for duty," Road Hazard said.

Fanatic climbed into the drivers seat. "Got the space bridge fired up?"

"Head Case, and Brain Wave are already working on it, it should be ready for you guys by the time we get there."

"Excellent, Minnie get in." Fanatic said. Minnie looked at Road Hazard suspiciously , and then slowly got into the passenger seat. "Road Hazard get us to the base."

"You got it boss." Road Hazard said. "HOLD ONTO YOUR SKIN!"

Before Minnie or Fanatic could say anything, Road Hazard had hit the gas, and then, in less than a millisecond, they went flying down the road, and off into the distance.

Max watched until they disappeared. He then leaned back and sighed. "At least, nothing bad has happened tonight outside of that."

*SMASH!*

Max fell over, with stars circling around his head.

Cindy, put her mallet back where it came from. "Alright girls, our plan worked, the guards are no longer any Problem." she announced.

The rest of the Little Princesses came out from the shadows.

"Excellent, soon we can sit in our rightful place with the other Disney Characters!" Zagi said.

"YAY!" All the girls cheered.

0o0o0o0o0

WG looked at the large crowd of Disney Characters, that were waiting for either Mickey or someone else to begin hosting again.

She took in a deep breath and then stepped out onto the stage.

"H-hello everyone… uh… Mickey… um… can't be here, b- but we are, um, in the process of getting him back."

She looked at the crowd and saw that everyone was glaring at her. She gulped.

"So, I have taken over duties as host for the time being, and if any of you have any complaints, come see either me or Daisy."

"NO!" The crowd yelled at the top of their lungs.

WG smirked and then continued. "So if any of you have any complaints I'll gladly give my hosting duties over to Daisy.

Another loud "NO!" sounded from the crowd.

"Alright then… um… (Daisy, could you give me help, here?)"

She stepped to the side to avoid knives and swords being thrown at her from Captain Hook's crew, and a jar of dirt thrown by Captain Jack Sparrow, and fire thrown at her from Chernabog.

"So here's a cartoon from our Favorite Duck, during his naval years!" WG then hopped on a mini-motorcycle and rode off the stage, much to the confusion and enjoyment of the crowd, as the Cartoon began to play. She then walked over to Daisy, who stood with her arms crossed.

"Well, how's the crowd? By the sounds of it, they weren't pleased to hear my name." Daisy scoffed.

"Sorry Daisy, but hey at least it got a laugh, from more people than the Hatter and Hare." WG remarked.

As she was talking, Cindy, Bianca, Hemi, Iria, and Zagi, all snuck back behind a nearby by door.

"Okay so the She-Author beast is hosting the club, and with the other guy gone, all we have to do is take her out and we'll be set to stay in here for the night, and possibly future nights!" Bianca declared.

"Girls, at very long last, we get what's coming to us." Cindy added, smirking.

While the princesses were plotting, two comic-characters snuck in. "Heh heh, with WG under so much pressure, she won't notice us in the club until we're rocking the place!" Calvin whispered.

"But the last time someone messed with WG while she was under-pressure, they ended up with a machete in their-" Hobbes began to say, but paused. "Er, wait… what rating is this story under, again?"

"Relax, ol' buddy! No one will get in the way THIS time," Calvin then grinned his trademark evil-grin, which Hobbes (as well as everyone else) knew only meant trouble.

TO BE CONTINUED…

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**Kitty (standing in for authors): Mew. *review.* Mew mew. *don't flame or you'll die.***


	7. WG The Host? (Part Two!)

**Disclaimer: WHY DO WE OWN NOTHING!?**

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"Road Hazard, Minnie is going to murder you."

The Porsche Transformed into his robot mode and then he looked over towards the gas Station where Minnie had run into after he had stopped. "Do you think she'll be alright?"

From within the bathroom another loud, "BAAARRRRRRFFF!" was heard, which was quite strange considering that they were nowhere near the bathroom.

"Well she should be fine after…about three more vomits."

"She'd better Fanatic, I don't want to have to stop again, we've still got at least thirty more minutes of travel time."

"BBBBBBBBAARRRRRF!"

Fanatic turned to face the Audience, "We're not leaving anytime soon here folks, how about you just go back to WG at the club and see whether or not it's in a smoldering ruin."

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Back at the Club things were running as smoothly as WG could make them, after the cartoon was finished she leapt up on stage dressed as a pirate.

"AHOY EVERYONE and welcome back to the House of Mouse, at this time we must ask you to refrain from dropping anything on anyone's head…..THAT MEANS YOU GUYS TOO!"

From within the crowd, Chip and Dale hid the safe that they were going to drop on Donald as he walked by.

"Anyway back to the show. We now have a little treat for you all ," WG said, tearing off the costume, revealing a copy of Belle's gown. "From deep within the Disney Vault, I give you all…..Beauty and the Beast the Animated Series EPISODE 4!"

Belle looked at the Beast confused and shocked. "How did SHE find those tapes?" she gasped.

The Beast shrugged and then sighed, "I knew we should have invested in a safe that had a tighter security system."

"You did!" Snapped one of the Queens of Hearts cards, "But it was red colored sooooooo… yeah sorry."

"ON WITH THE SHOW!" WG cried out and then tried to leap offstage and then ending up face planting. "Curse this costume!" she roared and then stormed off, as the cartoon began playing.”I had no idea that Mickey did this sometimes." She then pulled off the costume and then folded it up into a really small square and then stuck it into her pocket.

"Well on the on/off occasion he does," Daisy explained, lying as she said so. "Now then, I know the _perfect_ outfit for you to wear when you go up onstage next!"

*BAM!*

"Durrr never mind..."

*THUMP!*

Goofy looked down at the now unconscious Daisy Duck. "Garsh WG, that is smart I don't think anyone has ever thought to do that before!"

WG looked down at Daisy, a frying pan clutched in her hands. "It had to be done at some point, you know. Fanatic described Daisy (and Pete) as Starscream if he got a fat dog and a duck pregnant."

Goofy, Clarabelle and Donald all stared at her with extremely wide eyes, Donald broke the silence. "WHAAAAAT!?"

"It's true Donald," Max pointed out. "They both are making constant bids to make the club the way THEY want it."

"WHY I OUGHTTA WWWWWAAAAAHHH!" Donald cried out in a rage, and then charged toward WG, who pulled out a red cloth, and then she moved it aside as he ran…into 5 anvils, 6 Safes, the Titanic and a pie with each *swish!*

"Ole!" WG exclaimed.

"I surrender." Donald slurred as he passed out.

"Okay so now we are down four club employees."

"Try Five." Max said as he stumbled in with a large bump on his head.

"MAX!" Goofy cried out in horror and he raced over towards his son. "WHAT THE HECK HAPPENED TO YA!?"

"Princess,…..knock off, Knockout, GO TEAM GO!, Rah rah, mickey mouse, DONALD DUCK!, JET, TANK!"

*THUD!*

Everyone watched as Max passed out, leading to the ever growing pile of employees on the floor. WG looked at Goofy. "Okay so we're down to you myself, Clarabelle and Horace, the cooks and other waiters, who are never named and a bunch of Knock Off's are running around."

"WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO!?" Goofy asked in horror, "If any of us leave, then we lose the audience members!"

"Don't worry." Said WG standing in a dramatic pose, "I"VE GOT A PLAN!"

_~Three Seconds Later~_

"YOU’VE GOT TO HELP US!" WG pleaded, on her knees. "WE'RE BEGGING YOU!"

Drake Mallard looked down at the authoress. "There's only one of you here." he pointed out.

"I CAN’T MAKE UP AN ENTIRE BEGGING ARMY!" WG snapped.

Drake crossed his arms. "And why should I help you again?"

"Fanatic's got a _Darkwing Duck: The Movie_ Fanfic going on which he is suffering Writers Block on how to deal with it, so I will let you help him write the thing."

_ZIP!_

In less than a second Drake had ran off and he had returned as Darkwing Duck. "You've got yourself a deal." he then struck a dramatic pose. "Now… Lets. Get. Dangerous."

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"YYYYYYYYAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!" Minnie was screaming.

Fanatic face palmed. "MINNIE SHUT UP! WE’RE ONLY GOING ONE MILE OVER THE SPEED LIMIT!"

Minnie turned to look at him. "I don't see how you can act so… so CALM about driving around in an out of control hotshot!"

"Hey don't hate on me, I was the closest to the House of Mouse at the time." Road Hazard scoffed.

Fanatic looked at readout of energy signals. "Then why does it say, 'YOU MORON! SKYRIM WAS THE CLOSEST DON'T BELIEVE HIM!'?" he questioned.

"Ummmm OH LOOK WE’RE HERE!" Road Hazard yelled and then swerved off onto a side road, which led to a cliff face.

"AAAAAAAHHHHHH!" Minnie began screaming once again as Road Hazard showed no signs of slowing down at all.

Fanatic opened up a can of Root Beer and chugged it down as if there was nothing going on. Then they drove through the cliff face into a nice looking futuristic chrome colored base. (ooh, shiny!)

"AHHHHHHHHH!" Minnie still screamed until Fanatic stuffed a HUGE chunk of cheese into her mouth.

"Pipe down we're here already, now eat your cheese."

Minnie pulled out the cheese and glared at him. "Fanatic, I'm not doing anything until I get-"

Fanatic then got so close to Minnie that she could see his retinas clear as day. "CHEESE!" He bellowed and then returned to normal.

They drove into the base which was like every secret base in a cave ever made combined into one only Chrome colored.

They drove into the main room where about two other Transformers stood around a large round structure, one of them was a communications truck by the parts all over his body, the other one, was a missile truck.

The missile truck, who gave off a gruff military General WWII type guy looked at Road Hazard with Fanatic and Minnie. "Evening commander." he said, spit out a wad of tar in the process all over the floor. "Sorry 'bout the delay but Brain Wave had to leave, said somethin' 'bout some guy who got crushed under some rocks and he wanted to observe a dying tree."

Minnie raised an eyebrow and Fanatic said. "I don't get him sometimes." He looked over at the other Transformer. "Well Head Case?"

The Transformer turned to him reveling that he looked like a giant robotic Doc Brown in a lab coat, "Ah yes my dear boy, it's ready to send you to Mickey's location." he said.

Minnie blanched. "But how on earth do you know his location, it should have taken you a few hours alone just to get to where he teleported!" she questioned.

Fanatic looked at her. "You're dealing with Authors and OC's created by said author in a story fu;l of randomness Minnie- you might as well accept that myself, WG and a majority of our OC's are probably crazy… as well as any upcoming authors coming around Season 2 in this story, but more on that later."

Minnie sighed in defeat, as the portal opened. As they began to walk into Fanatic turned to them. "Keep the portal open, I have a feeling that we won't be too long, and then re direct it to the House of Mouse."

And with that he and Minnie walked through ready to face what lay beyond the other side.

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Meanwhile back at the club, Calvin and Hobbes were looking down from the walkway at the tables with the Disney Princesses.

Hobbes was just staring with wide eyes at them and drooling, mostly due to where he was (oh brother), while Calvin was holding a bucket of Water Balloons.

"Heh, Heh, These Princesses won't know what hit them."

Hobbes looked over at Calvin. "I don't know, they could get mad, and if WG finds out… and is something on fire?" he said, smelling smoke.

Calvin was about to respond when he looked around, smoke was pouring over them and then a voice called out: "I AM THE TERROR THAT FLAPS IN THE NIGHT! I AM THE BOOK THAT CANNOT BE READ!" Darkwing stood in the smoke his arm extended and his gas gun in hand. "I AM DARKWING DUCK!"

*SPLASH*

"HEY!"

*SPLOSH!*

"STOP THAT!"

*SPLASH!*

"I MEAN IT!"

*SPLISH!*

Darkwing growled and then fired his gas gun at Calvin, which then hit him in the head and then released a Knockout Gas, and then Calvin fell into his bucket of Water Balloons .

"And to think Launchpad told me that buying the Six year old Knock Out gas cartridges was a waste of money." He then turned top face Hobbes. "Now, am I gonna have to gas you, or…?"

Before he finished, Hobbes was picking up Calvin and then walking down the stairs. "I'll let myself out, thank you!" he called back, breaking into a sprint.

Darkwing sighed happily. "It's always nice when they go quietly."

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Later Darkwing went up to WG who was… for some reason… now dressed as Belle again."Well that's taken care of." he proudly said.

WG looked at him shocked. "You caught the princesses?" she asked.

Darkwing arched and eyebrow. "The Princesses? No I got rid of Calvin and Hobbes, though all I did was gas Calvin. Hobbes, just walked away."

WG smirked. "Well that takes care of that short sub plot, now I have to enact my own plan to get rid of the Knockoffs."

"How?' Darkwing inquired.

WG put on a Belle wig. "Simple."

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The Knockoffs were walking through the club in the back ways.

"This is it girls, we'll make history." Zagi said.

"OHHH I CANNOT WAIT!" Hemi cried out.

Suddenly a figure in a bright yellow gown appeared in front of them. "Oh hello there girls." "Belle" said with a smile.

"AHHHHHHHHHH!" The Knock offs shrieked still smiling, until 'Belle' shushed them.

"Relax girl's I'm not going to kick you out."

They all looked up at her. "You're not?"

"No in fact I have a really special surprise for you." "Belle" said handing them a book.

"Oh what is it?" Iria asked like an idiot.

"I Think it's a book, and look at the cover." Cindy said with a gasp. "On it was crudely drawn paper that said, 'How to Become a Disney Princess'!"

"Belle" smirked at the idiots. "Yes and there is a very special page." She said, bending down and opening the book up to a page with a button. "This button makes you an official Princess."

They all gasped, and then, like idiots pressed the button, and then a giant boxing glove fist burst out, punching them off into the sky, and off into the distance.

WG smirked and then pulled off the wig, and then held up the book, peeling off the paper reveling the actual cover to be, _"The Warner Siblings Book of Buttons That Cause Pranks On Annoying Antagonists- Special Collectors Edition."_

Then a space bridge portal opened and Mickey, and a ticked off Minnie and Fanatic walked through.

"We're back." Fanatic muttered bitterly. "And nice costume WG, looks like you raided the prop basement."

"Did more then raid I took every single thing related to Beauty and the Beast down there, and… Micky, why do you and Minnie looked as peeved as I am at Fanatic for writing me into a belle costume and the Chapter with Baby Shelby?"

Mickey sighed. "I had no idea I have so many fans down in Mexico my arms hurt from writing so many autographs." he said.

"There's your answer." Fanatic said bitterly. "Now, boss…GET YOUR BUTT ON THAT STAGE NOW!" and with that he hurled Mickey on stage.

Minnie sighed as she walked away. "I am NEVER going on another road trip again!"

Fanatic looked at WG. "So how did hosting go?" he asked.

"Not so bad, I got some help with Darkwing to get rid of the Knock offs and Calvin and Hobbes, whom Calvin got gassed into submission by Darkwing and Hobbes just walked away , and those Knock Offs I fooled with this book."

WG then held up the book which now had a picture of Optimus Prime on the cover, with the title, _Transformers: Revenge of the Dark Moon._

Fanatic gasped. "WHAT ON EARTH IS THAT!?"

"A transformers book, here," WG replied, opening it to another page with a button. "This will play the story out as a hologram… like that book in Treasure Planet."

"EPIC!" Fanatic said and then slammed his fist down onto the button. In a millisecond, Fanatic was crushed by a eighteen ton Steel Mallet.

"And that was for putting me in a Belle costume." WG snapped.

"Note to self…never mess with WG like that ever again." Fanatic muttered. "…and also never trust a book with buttons written by Warner's."

"And now you know." WG said and then walked away. As Fanatic got up Darkwing approached him.

"Hey is what WG said true about you writing a Darkwing Duck Movie story?"

"oh gosh." Fanatic said, his eyes wider than his co-authoress was when she first saw a Fangface DVD.

"I take that as a yes… now then I was thinking about what if at the end Morgana and I finally tie the knot after defeating Nega Duck and the Fearsome Five once and for all in an epic battle to the death."

Fanatic twitched… not what he was expecting.

WG stood outside with Max. "So all's well that ends well right?" Maz asked.

WG smirked. "Yep and Fanatic is finally getting his comeuppance."

Fanatic ran outside and then spoke through gritted teeth. "YOU ARE GONNA PAY!" and with that he ran inside once again.

WG and Max watched him. "Shouldn't you be worried about him WG?"

"What why should I, besides the fact..that..he's…..writing…most..of….the chapters…of…this…fanfic."

She suddenly tore into the club after him, with an apology at the ready.

Max sighed. "I don't think things are ever going to get back to normal around here."

From in an alleyway nearby a figure watched the two Authors.

"Oh you don't know the half of it, muhahahhahaahahh." And with that the figure faded back into the shadows.

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**A/N: (runs out with stacks of Transformers stuff, all the volumes of Darkwing Duck, and all the Nostalgia Critic DVDs) …The things I do to make my co-authors happy. Hope you all enjoyed! (runs off) FOR THE LAST TIME, I'M SORRY! IT COULD HAVE BEEN WORSE!**

**Fanatic: WORSE?! HOW?!**

**Me: Well…. there could have been a reference to that awful book-series that I will NOT mention. …That and we could have gotten spammed.**

**Fanatic: True…**

**Me: …I'll let you throttle all the flamers, no mercy required.**

**Fanatic: :D OKAY! (runs off with weapons)**

**Me: (to readers) In other words, FLAMERS, BEWARE!**


	8. The Clone Cliche

**I'd like to give a big thanks to my co-author, Fanatic97, for working on the last few chapters while I was busy and for the ideas that helped feed the inspiration. Many cupcakes for you, my friend!**

**And now I present to you the first chapter I've written on my own in a while.**

**Disclaimer: We don't own anything, WHICH MAKES THIS CRUEL WORLD EVEN MORE HARD TO DEAL WITH! (…k, time to take my meds)**

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Blah blah blah, typical night, yadda yadda, House of Mouse, doo doo doo, no O'Mally and the alley cats, ni ni ni… security authors out front.

Max looked up at the paragraph above. "Speeding things along tonight?" he asked Fanatic, who stepped out.

"Well, yeah, we had a off-set situation and didn't have much time to give all the details." Fanatic answered.

"What was the situation?"

Suddenly, WG came running out, holding up a bunch of squealing girls and chucking them across the street. "FOR THE LAST TIME, NO RABID FAN-GIRLS CAN ENTER! HALF THE GUYS ARE EITHER TAKEN OR TOO YOUNG, AND JIM ISN'T LOOKING FOR A RELATIONSHIP NOW! IF I HAVE TO TELL YOU THAT AGAIN, YOU CAN KISS THOSE OC BASED OFF YOURSELVES GOODBYE!" she screamed, then turned to her friends, all calm-like. "Well, that takes care of that. Anyone up for some crab rangoons?"

"WHAT?!" Sebastian cried out.

"No offense, dude!" WG shook her head. "Man, it's hard to bring up food considering half the club consists of animals."

"That would explain why the Three Little Pigs had strokes after seeing Fanatic eating bacon the other night." Max commented.

"Hey, I missed dinner, and I doubt it was anyone they knew!" Fanatic sneered, then held his stomach, eyes wide. "At least… I HOPE it wasn't."

Max rolled his eyes. "So… what's the plot going to consist of tonight?"

"Meh, probably something cliché yet worthwhile… BUT what are the chances of THAT happening?" WG said, sarcastically.

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**_MEANWHILE!_ **

A car went speeding down the street, and at the wheel was a character wearing a black mask, striped orange-and-black shirt, green ski-cap… and looking similar to Goofy. In the backseat of the car were bags filled with tons of stolen cash, jewels, gold, and the new Kingdom Hearts III game. Behind him, a squad car pursued, driven by a fat man with brown hair and a mustache wearing a tan shirt and tie, and an orange bobcat wearing a police uniform. "There he is, Lucky! We've almost got him!" The bobcat exclaimed, bouncing up and down.

"We're gonna lose him if you don't bouncing like a maniac!" Lucky snapped.

"You'll never take me alive, coppers!" The thief shouted at them.

"WOW! I haven't heard that cliché line in years!" The bobcat exclaimed.

The thief made a sharp turn down a street and the squad car followed, then he took another turn, then another, then another…

On a map we see red and blue dotted lines that show where the cars are driving, going around every block possible… the red one suddenly writing 'Eat At Joe's' on Mainstreet.

Finally, the criminal took a sharp turn down an alley, getting out of the car and grabbing the bags of loot, making a run on foot… but not before grabbing a cute little kitten and throwing it in the lane, and running off snickering.

"There's his car! It looks like he took off on foot. We'll have to-" Lucky began to say.

"WATCH OUT! KITTEN IN THE ROAD!" The bobcat screamed, and grabbed the steering wheel.

The kitten crouched and covered its eyes, though the car went on two wheels and swerved around it. It looked over its shoulder and wiped its forehead.

*CRASH!*

The squad-car smashed into the criminal's car, Lucky crashed through the back and front windshields, while the bobcat somehow ended up in the glove box. "Bonkers…" he growled.

"Hey, at least no one got hurt…" Bonkers said… though the airbag went off and squished him into the seat, and he pulled out a pin to deflate it.

"Speak for yourself… and that criminal got away!"

*POP!*

Bonkers shook his head, and looked out the window. "Not so, Lucky- he left some footprints behind! And he's heading straight for that club!"

"Well, c'mon! Lets go get him!"

"Right!" Bonkers took off… leaving Lucky still stuck.

"BONKERS!"

"Whoops! Forgot something!" he pried Lucky out and they took off.

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The criminal, meanwhile, snuck into the alley behind the House of Mouse. "Gotta find a place to hide from those dimwits!" he said to himself… then noticed Goofy walking out with a trash-bag. "And I think I know just how to blend in!"

Goofy threw the trash away, humming along… until he was yanked behind a dumpster. "Yow!" he cried.

*Bink! Bank! Bonk! Boing!*

The criminal stepped out, now dressed like Goofy. "Good luck with the cops, doofus," he snickered, then entered the club.

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Fanatic paused. "What is it?" WG asked, knowing that sudden pauses always meant stuff was about to go down.

"Ever have the feeling the plot is about to run into you?" he answered.

*BAM!*

Bonkers and Lucky were running down the street until they tripped at the curb, crashing into the Security Guards. "…yes…" WG grunted. "Um, excuse me sirs, but you're kind of crushing my pancreas, and my friend's liver…"

Fanatic held up a plate that had liver on it. "Actually, it's for Tiger- I hate liver." he said. "HEY TIGER!"

The co-author's cat then ran up, eating the liver.

"WAIT A MINUTE! I KNOW YOU GUYS!"

"I KNOW THEM TOO!" WG exclaimed.

"WELL I RECOGNIZED THEM FIRST!"

"I'VE WATCHED THEM LONGER THAN YOU HAVE!"

"YEAH… WELL… I'VE GOT CHOCOLATE PREZTELS, SO NYAH!"

WG snapped her fingers. "Darn it!"

"What's that got to do with anything?" Lucky asked.

"Chocolate pretzels beat any argument… only way to beat them is with cream-puffs."

Lucky sighed, shaking his head. "Look, we don't have time for this. We're looking for a dangerous criminal who goes by the name of Odd-Rod," he held up a picture of the thief. "Seen him?"

Once everyone saw the picture, their eyes widened. "Well, we can all certainly see where THIS chapter is going!" WG said, crossing her arms.

"Yep- look alike comes along, causes trouble, makes it look like the person they're posing as is to blame OR ends up suffering (depending on who they're impersonating), and they either get caught or get away leaving nothing resolved." Fanatic added. "Meanwhile, the REAL identity is either bound and gagged somewhere, living the culprit's life, or ends up showing up whenever the identity-thief is out of sight and takes the heat for whatever happens."

"You've guys seen this happen before, haven't you?" Max quipped.

"Only on every single show made in the history of television." WG replied, then clapped her hands together. "So! Lets roll with it and see what pattern follows. …We're going to need back-up though, these situations tend to be tricky."

"I'm waaaaay ahead of you, Wherever." Fanatic said coolly, then turned off-set. "HEY _DARK_! WE NEED YOU TO MAKE ANOTHER CAMEO, PRONTO!"

"But I just- Er, I mean, Darkwing isn't here at the moment!" the voice of Drake Mallard called.

"Well, tell him he'd better be, otherwise I'll tell my boyfriend- who need I remind everyone that as of my story 'Family Traits' owns the Disney Studio in the tooniverse- that he can skip the idea of making Fanatic's Darkwing Duck movie-fanfic a theatrical release!"

Suddenly there was a puff of smoke. "I'm the terror, that flaps in the night! I'm the star that never fades away! I… am-"

"Skip the intro, we've got a plot to get to." WG yanked Darkwing Duck out of the cloud of smoke.

"Hey! You spoiled my dramatic entrance!"

"Actually it's only dramatic when you're facing your enemies- otherwise it's a waste of special effects."

Bonkers let out an excited gasp. "We're having Darkwing Duck help us on the case?" he asked.

"Not only Darkwing, but…" WG said, then held up her finger in a 'one minute' gesture then ran into the club.

The others just stood there. "…but, what?" Lucky asked, arching an eyebrow.

WG came running back out, carrying Detective Basel of Baker Street in the palm of her hand. "Basel of Baker Street! If anyone can help deduce where the criminal is AND spot him from the original Goofy, it's this fella here."

"Pardon me, my dear-" Basel began, then observed WG closely. "…'girl', but could you PLEASE inform me of why you picked me up while I was in the middle of my tea and crumpets?"

"Sorry, Basel, but we'd like your assistance. We need all the help we can get."

"Ah, yes- from what you just mentioned two sentences ago, there must be a 'Goofy' impersonator on the run," he then looked at Lucky and Bonkers. "And from the torn-up state that fairly plump man is in, as well as the excited look on his bobcat partner's face, they are on the hunt for him and have tracked him to this very location, possibly from the scene of a bank heist."

"That's right! How do you do it?" Bonkers asked, amazed.

"Well, it's all elementary, my dear man." he turned to the Security guards. "And, if I might also deduce, with Goofy's clumsy nature and reputation of a klutz, everyone will begin to notice that he isn't the real waiter, as well as notice how frustrated he will get once the dinner rush picks up. However, there's also the chance that this criminal may be the master of impersonation, and the only way to tell them apart is to have them together and from reasons of questioning find out who the real Goofy is."

"Wow, he's good." Fanatic said.

"Yeah, well… I bet he doesn't know where the culprit is now!" Darkwing sneered, trying not to sound jealous.

"Actually, it's quite simple." Basel said, hopping out of WG's hand and walking down the sidewalk, finding a penny on the ground. "A-ha! This is a 1978 penny, and from the scuffs on it, as well as the feel of the temperature, it has been in a fabricated sack, which has a hole in it…" he looked down the alley. "And it seems he has snuck around to the back entrance, and from the way that trash can is slanting there were signs of a struggle."

Darkwing crossed his arms. "Show off." he muttered.

"Thanks, Basel. All we have to do now is find Odd-Rod and catch him before he ruins Goofy's reputation," WG said.

"Is there anything to ruin?" Lucky joked, only to get a glare from Max. "Uh, no offense."

"Good luck with it, chaps. I'd assist you, but I've given you enough," Basel said, then motioned to Darkwing. "Not to mention, you have Darkwing Duck on your side, so I guarantee you'll have this case solved in the matter of…" he took out his pocket watch. "…ten minutes and 23 seconds."

Darkwing grinned. "Well, you heard the mouse! Lets catch that clone!" he exclaimed.

"Right. Fanatic and I will look around the dining area; Lucky, Bonkers, you too search around backstage; Darkwing, grab your team and search the alley and kitchen area, see if Goofy is alright." WG said. "Lets go, guys, GO!"

They split up… while that kick-awesome soundtrack from 'Mission: Impossible' played in the background.

Max scratched his head. "Hey, Basel, you're a great detective- you could've had the case solved in one minute flat… why aren't you helping?" he asked.

"In case you haven't noticed, Maxamillion, we're only on the sixth page and the plot has just begun, meaning it would be nothing but wasteful drabble if we cut from the problem to solution without anything worthwhile in the middle," Basel answered, lighting his pipe. "…Not to mention, as egotistical Darkwing Duck happens to be, I immediately noticed the look of jealousy on his face, and considering this case is more of his level." he walked back into the club. "…Not to mention, the story needs the comedy relief, other than Goofy and his criminal-clone causing mishaps."

"Speaking of which, I'd better go make sure my dad is alright!" Max then took off down the alley.

"…Ah, yes. That too."

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Meanwhile, the criminal- Odd-Rod- snuck across the kitchen with the bag of money, stashing it behind some sacks of flour. "All I have to do is blend in, then when this joint closes, I can grab the goods 'n' go!" he said.

"Yes, but right now you'd better go and get these orders out to their tables!" shouted a French voice, and he turned to see the talking stove from Beauty and the Beast, holding up several order-tickets and motioning to several plates. "Come come, make haste! The customers won't wait forever!"

"Yeah, yeah, I'm on it bub- er, I mean… 'hyuck', okey-dokey stove-a-roni!" Picking up the plates and tickets, he walked out of the kitchen, grumbling.

As soon as Odd-Rod was through the door, Darkwing, Gosalyn, and Launchpad came through. "With Goofy's diabolical double on the loose, and only a few clues left behind, Darkwing Duck enters the scene of the crime, where the culprit had entered last…"

"…all the while narrating his every move like he always does," Gosalyn commented. "Really, Darkwing, you should stop that habit, otherwise your enemies will figure out your every move."

"Ha! I'll have you know, I know how to keep my phrases to myself- no one probably heard me anyway!"

"Hey, if you're looking for Goofy, he just went through the door." the stove told them. "Be careful, though, he's in a strange mood- stranger than usual, I mean."

"Told you so," Gosalyn whispered to Darkwing.

"Just keep moving!" Darkwing said, sternly.

They exited the kitchen, and the stove shook his head. "Oi, why so many characters speak their plans aloud, I will never know." he said, then turned to one of the penguins. "Hey, one of you, bring over those sacks of flour!"

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Meanwhile, Goofy came to in the alley, rubbing his head. "Gawrsh, that was weird," he said, a bit dazed. "I had a dream some feller grabbed me, knocked me out, and dressed up like me, then ran into the kitchen with some bags full of money." he shrugged, standing up. "Oh, well. Better get back to my job,"

He walked into the kitchen… much to the stove's confusion. "What the…? I thought you were- didn't I see- weren't you just…?!" he stammered, then shook his head. "Never mind. Hand me that sack of flour!"

"Sure thing," Goofy said, then grabbed a sack of flour, carrying it over his shoulder.

Darkwing, Gosalyn, and Launchpad walked back in by that moment, the masked-mallard holding his hand over one eye. "Nobody move! I dropped a contact lens somewhere in here…" he called.

"HEY! THERE'S THE CROOK!" Launchpad shouted.

"LETS GET HIM!" Gosalyn exclaimed, and the two of them attacked Goofy!

"YEEOWHOHOWIEEE!" Goofy cried his trademark yell, as he was pinned to the ground.

"Ah, here it is," Darkwing said, picking up his contact, wiping it clean, and putting it back in his eye… then realized his sidekicks were wrestling with Goofy. "GUYS! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!"

"Catching the criminal, what's it look like?!" Gosalyn sneered.

"That's not the criminal- didn't you hear the trademark yell?!"

"But, he might know how to do his voice!" Launchpad reminded him.

"Just get off him so we can question him!"

They got up, and Goofy sat up, a bit nervous. "*gulp* This wouldn't have anything to do with that tag I tore off my mattress three years ago, does it?" he asked.

"Come with us, Goofy- IF THAT'S YOUR REAL NAME!" Darkwing then grabbed him by the arm. "We've got a few questions for you!"

"Golly… I hope it's multiple choice…"

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Bonkers and Lucky were backstage, when WG and Fanatic came up, wearing sunglasses. "Well, we haven't seen any sign of Goofy in the dining area," WG said.

"Huh, I figured he was always running around there," Lucky questioned.

"Well, we literately didn't see him," Fanatic said, and they took off their sunglasses. "It's hard to see anything with lenses this dark!"

"I knew we should have gone with the NCIS look rather than the Miami Vice," WG added, tucking away her sunglasses.

Lucky arched an eyebrow. "And you guys got hired as security guards… how?" he asked.

"Manager desperation." The two answered in unison, then arched eyebrows at each other. "Hey, how'd you do that? …How are you doing that? …You did it again! …That is weird, like you know what I'm going to say right as you- Dude, that's amazing! Awesome! Cool! …Yeah… Okay, now it's getting creepy. Stop it. …You stop it! No, you! You! I said it first! Nuh-uh, we said it at the same time, it's a tie! I mean it, stop it! St- … Op- … IT!"

Lucky pinched the bridge of his nose. "We're not getting anywhere. Lets check the dining area," he sighed.

"Right behind you, Lucky!" Bonkers said.

They walked out… while WG and Fanatic stood in front of each other. "Super cali fragilicous expi ali docious!" they shouted together. "HEY! YOU PRONOUNCED IT WRONG!"

"WOULD YOU GUYS CUT IT OUT?!" Lucky shouted, then pointed at Fanatic. "You! Come with me! Bonkers, you go with the girl,"

Fanatic shrugged and followed Lucky, and Bonkers looked at WG. "…Wanna hit the kitchen?" she asked.

"Okay!" Bonkers exclaimed.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

With Odd-Rod, he had dropped off all the dishes to their tables, and was about to run back to the kitchen…

"HEY WAITER! YOU GAVE ME THE WRONG ORDER!" Timon shouted from his table, then held up a plate of bones. "What do I look like, a dog?!"

"Ew, there's bugs all over this plate!" One of Ariel's sisters cried, and they all shrieked in disgust.

"Hey, who ordered the wood chips?!" Dodger called.

Pinocchio looked at his plate, which was covered in seaweed and dressings. "Doesn't look that bad…" he said, then his nose grew.

Odd-Rod ran from table to table, switching the orders with the right customers. "Sorry/My mistake/Here you go/Eat up," he said quickly, then ran toward the kitchen…

"Oh, waiter!" Snow White called from the Princess table. "Can we get some apple-martinis… non-poison, if you'd please, we're driving home tonight."

"Uh, right away," he ran into the kitchen, returning with some glasses filled with the drink and handed it to them. "Enjoy!" He ran back to the kitchen…

"Yo, Goof-my-man!" King Louie called. "Mind hitting me and my boys up with a fruit salad- hold the salad!"

"Coming right up…"

"Oh, while you're at it, could you bring us a cheese platter?" Bianca asked.

"Sure-"

"Hold it, Goofy! I dropped my fork, can you get me a new one?" Robin Hood asked.

"One moment-"

"Hey, waiter, we need a towel over here!" Hades called, sitting with the Titans… the magma one spilling lava on the tablecloth. "Preferably one that's fire-retardant!"

"Grrrr…!" Odd-Rod was steaming, then raced into the kitchen, grabbing everything and practically throwing it all to the customers.

He then ran to the kitchen, wiping his forehead. "Glad that's over…"

"HEY GOOFY! You're falling behind! Get these orders out there!" came a shout.

Odd-Rod looked, seeing a tower of trays at least ten feet high. "…mother…"

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Fanatic and Lucky peeked out from underneath a tablecloth, looking over the dining area right after 'Goofy's' display of rushed service. "Weird… Goofy tends to screw up, but not that much, let alone he went three laps without a single trip," the co-author said, rubbing his chin. "Methinks he's either OOC, or that's our culprit."

"I'll radio the others," Lucky said, taking out a walkie-talkie. "Bonkers,"

"Yes Lucky? (over)," Bonkers answered.

"I think we've found our guy."

"Same here, WG and I just spotted him! (over)"

"What's your position?"

"We're crouching under Aladdin's table (over)."

Lucky paused. "Bonkers…"

"Yeah, Lucky? (over)."

"THAT'S WHERE WE ARE!"

Zooming out, we see the foursome are under the table, Bonkers and WG facing the other direction. WG held up her walkie-talkie. "That explains why this thing kept getting jammed," she said.

"C'mon, Odd-Rod just went into the kitchen!"

"I'll go fetch Darkwing and see if he's found the real Goofy," Fanatic said, then raced off with WG.

"Lets go, Bonkers, before he tries to slip out,"

"Roger that, Lucky. (over)." Bonkers said, still using the walkie-talkie.

"WOULD YOU STOP THAT?!"

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Meanwhile, Darkwing was in the closet, a spotlight shining on Goofy who sat in a chair, as the masked mallard was questioning him. "Alright, buddy-boy, you can't play dumb for long…" he said, darkly. "Now, let me ask you this…" he got up close. "How many seasons did Goof Troop last for?!"

"Gawrsh, I don't remember! Time sorta flies when you're watching your kids grow up," Goofy answered.

Darkwing pulled away. "Hmm, Goofy never did know the answer to that question… BUT, that's probably the same kind of answer any criminal double would give!" he said. "We can do this all night if we have to…"

*Knock Knock*

"Come in!" Launchpad said… getting clonked by Darkwing.

"How many times do I have to tell you, don't invite guests in during questioning?!" Darkwing hissed.

"What's going on in here?" Max asked, opening the door.

"Hiya, Max! …Say, would you mind telling these guys to let me go? My break's been over with for the last five minutes," Goofy said.

"Not until we get some answers, bub!" Gosalyn said. "You ain't going anywhere unless you have proof that you're the real Goofy!"

Max rolled his eyes. "If he wasn't, he wouldn't have known my name," he said.

The trio paused. "Huh. Should have asked that question first." Darkwing said, a bit embarrassed.

Fanatic and WG came running in just then. "We found the crook- and why does the closet look like an interrogation room?" WG asked.

"Long story, but first things first!" Darkwing said. "Lets. Get. Dangerous…"

"TO THE KITCHEN!" Fanatic exclaimed.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

With Odd-Rod, he was carrying a tray with a large cake in the shape of the entire Disneyland amusement park on it, and as large and heavy it was, he was having trouble lifting it. "Stupid… Unbirthday… Special…!" he grunted.

"Alright, bub, hold it right there!" Bonkers shouted. "We know you're not the real Goofy, so put your hands in the air!"

Odd-Rod glared, but smirked. "Okay." He then threw the cake into the air, and it landed on the two cops! "So long, coppers!" he then ran into the kitchen…

…only to see the Darkwing Duck crew waiting for him. "Going somewhere?" Darkwing Duck asked, holding out his gas-gun.

Odd-Rod took out his gun. "Don't try anything… I've got a gun!"

*ZAP!*

The gun was blasted out of his hands… and he looked, seeing Fanatic holding WG like a rifle. "Yeah… well, I have laser-vision." WG said.

"Say hello to my little friend!" Fanatic exclaimed.

WG looked up at him. "Was that a crack at my height, or were you just ripping off a cliché?"

"Uh… basically both."

WG rolled her eyes.

"You can't stop me! I'm going to grab my money and- HUH?!" Odd-Rod looked over, seeing that the bag of money, as well as all the flour, was gone! "What happened to it?! It was right here!"

"Ooh, you didn't put it with the flour, did you?" Gosalyn asked. "Because the whole kitchen staff had to use all of it to make that cake you walked out with."

Odd-Rod's jaw dropped, and he ran out, looking over and seeing the cops creamed with cake… and money, gold, and jewels. "Oh, yum! Chocolate!" Bonkers exclaimed, taking a bite… with a *crack!* his eyes bugged out, and he stuck his tongue out, seeing a few diamonds in the frosting. "Huh. I always thought you only found prizes in your cereal!"

"Get that imposter!" Max shouted.

Odd-Rod then made a break for the exit. "I'm outta here! So long, suckers!" he shouted, rushing out the doors…

Outside, Fanatic was eating bananas and threw a peel down, and the criminal slipped on it, sliding across the pavement and toward Darkwing, who held up a pair of handcuffs which the criminal slid into wrists-first, then WG stuck her foot out and tripped the criminal, making him fall into the back seat of the police car.

"I love cartoons," WG quipped.

"Well, thanks for helping us catch that criminal," Lucky said.

"And keeping my dad's name clean," Max added, putting his arm around his father.

"All in a day's work for the average heroes," Darkwing boasted.

"Well, everyone, hope you all had a good time despite the mishaps tonight. See you again real soon!" Mickey called on stage, then walked over to the security guards. "…Would you all mind telling me what all happened tonight? There's been talk about messed up orders, and jewels in cake, and doubles, and… and…"

"Relax, Mick, it's all taken care of," WG said, patting him on the back. "But from now on, lets start checking everyone's ID."

"Just so we won't have to deal with another evil-twin episode again?" Fanatic asked.

"That… and I'm pretty sure Cruella's driver's license expired twenty years ago,"

*SCREEEECH!*

*CRASH!*

Cruella's car sped by, knocking over a fire hydrant as she did.

"…Yep. ID check. Good idea." Fanatic agreed.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

**A/N: Gotta love these kinds of scenarios.**

**Please review. No flames or an army of rabid kittens will lay siege at your front door.**


	9. Back Up Time!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Trivia: This is the first chapter that introduces Sailor and Colin, two authors on Fanfiction(dot)Net who would leave reviews on some of my old stories, as well as my boyfriend (who on the site went by FF2); in later chapters and the sequel, Fanatic and I included other close author friends/loyal reviewers to serve as either backup and become official team members. 
> 
> Hey, who said security guards couldn't have their own squads? ;)

**And now for a somewhat chilling- yet nonetheless hilarious- chapter ;)**

**Disclaimer: *looks at watch* Still own nothing…**

0o0o0o0o0

_"It was yet another regular night at the House of Mouse… At least, that's how I remembered it. It was around 7:45 when everything became amiss, when I felt a strange presence following me on my way to work. I kept looking over my shoulder at the crowded streets, having a feeling someone or something was following me- who or what it was, I didn't know, I was just hoping it wasn't some princess knock-off, as I was getting bored with fending them off with my machete, laser-vision, and other lethal advantages._

_“I arrived at the club at 8, meeting up with Fanatic, both of us waiting for guests to arrive while the rest of the staff went to their own posts… and suddenly, in a blink of an eye, we were back in time. Having gained knowledge of such circumstances thanks to my boyfriend, I knew it only meant one thing… Weeping Angels. Mickey, as soon as you receive this letter, I advise you to warn the guests and whatever you do- don't turn around, don't look away, and do NOT blink._

_“…Oh, and also Fanatic wants you to make sure no one touches his autographed Darkwing Duck poster and that someone feeds his kitty, Tiger._

_Sincerely, Wherever Girl- from the year 1978_."

Mickey looked over the letter again and again, standing out front with Max. "It's got to be some sort of prank. Maybe the two authors are just using an excuse to take time off," the mouse guessed.

"I don't think so, Mickey. I was walking over to them, blinked, and they were suddenly gone." Max told him. "And I know they wouldn't just abandon their posts before showtime. Face it, Mickey- our security guards have been kidnapped."

_(Insert House of Mouse theme song here! Namely just for dramatic pause and stuff. Anyone still remember how it goes? …Anyone?)_

Mickey had gathered the rest of the staff backstage, showing them the letter. "I called up FF2, he says he'll be along to help," Goofy said.

"When will he get here?" Donald asked. There was a strange humming sound, and an old Police Contact Box began to appear around him. "WAH!" he quickly ran out of the way before the image became solid. "What the heck…?!"

The doors of the TARDIS opened… and out stepped Fangface the Second (aka, FF2, for those of you who don't know). "Alright, Dad, care to tell me why you called me up as I was playing _Dead Rising,_ telling me my girlfriend is gone?" he asked, firmly.

"I'm really sorry, FF2, but Max here told me some crying angels took her and Fanatic away," Goofy said, wiping a tear. "Poor kids… they were so young!" he then busted out crying.

"Dad. They're not dead." Max put bluntly. "They were taken by weeping angels."

"One moment." FF2 said, then picked up a glass of water, took a sip, then did a spit-take. "WEEPING ANGELS?! Great Scott, guys! Why didn't you inform me sooner?!"

"Um… we don't really know what 'weeping angels' are," Daisy spoke up.

"Don't you watch Doctor Who?"

Everyone shook their heads.

FF2 sighed, face-palming. "Weeping Angels are the deadliest creatures you could ever face, who can move quickly and silently, and feed of time-streams, such as by sending one back in time. However, if they are observed, they become quantum-locked, in which they are frozen in position yet difficult to destroy."

"Why are they called 'weeping angels' then?" Minnie asked.

"Because of the way they cover their eyes- they can't look at each other, otherwise they'll be frozen until an outside force moves them away. No one really knows where they've come from… but apparently, they're here, and they've taken your two security authors away to a different time."

"That's what the letter said! They were taken to the year 1978. " Mickey said, showing him the letter.

FF2 looked at it, gritting his teeth, then looked around. "Mickey, follow WG's orders- everyone keep your eyes open for any stone-angels. Stay together!" he turned to Max. "Max, come with me… we're going to hunt some angels."

"Wait! We need a security guard!" Minnie exclaimed.

"Don't worry, I'm sure WG made sure to send a note for back-up." With that, FF2 and Max took off.

"…I thought HE was the back-up," Donald questioned.

"If it's not him, then who is it?" Daisy wondered aloud.

There came a descending whistle…

*CRASH!*

… and a safe fell in the street, opening up and revealing two familiar faces: Sailor Androm3da and Supah KND Operation Colin (“Colin” for short).

"Wow, Fanatic was right! Traveling by a catapulted safe IS quicker than driving!" Colin exclaimed, stepping out.

"And no need for licenses, too!" Sailor Androm3da added.

"Oh no… not two more!" Donald groused, face-palming.

"Are… you two the replacement security guards?" Minnie gulped.

"We sure are! WG advised that if anything were to happen to her and/or Fanatic, we could fill in!" Colin exclaimed. "…We were going to make an appearance around Season 2, but considering the circumstances, an abrupt cameo was amust."

"But how did you guys find out?!" Mickey asked.

"She sent us an e-mail, filling us in about the situation, but how she didn't have much time left to do anything," Sailor Androm3da said, glumly. "I suppose… she's aged so much and has gone to meet her maker…"

"I ain't dead, you dimwit!" came an elderly voice… and up walked an old lady with a cane, wearing jeans and a T-shirt, and looking like a wrinkled-up WG. "Good grief, you age a few years, and people assume you're dead! You youngsters have no respect for old people!"

"WHA…?! WHEREVER GIRL?! B-but, you said you didn't have much time left…!"

"Because I haven't paid for my internet connection in months and they were shutting it off, not because I was going to die! Sheesh!"

"But… where's Fanatic?" Colin asked.

"Oh, he's gone… *sniff*."

"Oh my gosh! He's…?"

"*sniff- hack! cough* Ugh! Stupid phlegm… As I was saying, he's gone- to the bathroom." she looked over her shoulder at some public restrooms. "HEY FAN! HURRY IT UP, WILL YA?!"

"I'm hurrying, I'm hurrying! Don't rush me, woman!" an elderly man's voice shouted, and out walked an old man with a gray beard, thick-framed glasses with very thick lenses, wearing a 'I 'Heart' Bacon' shirt with plaid pants and suspenders, walking with a walker… and, as revealed, was actually Fanatic. "Good gravy, can't an old feller take his time in the bathroom anymore?"

"If you took your time, we'd be dead!"

"Oh shut up! You're the one who said we should eat at Taco Bell!"

"Uh, I hate to interrupt your conversation but… WHAT THE HECK IS GOING ON HERE?!" Mickey shouted.

"Oh, well we just came to warn you about the weeping angels… in case you didn't get my letter." Old-Wherever-Lady said.

"Yeah, you can't really rely on proper postage anymore," Old-Man Fanatic added. "Ooh, I see the recruits arrived," he adjusted his glasses- through them, everything seemed to be maximized about 100 times. "…my, what big heads you've got."

"So how are we going to get rid of the bawling angels?" Goofy asked.

"Well, I'm guessing someone's already told FF2, so he's probably on the case," Old-Wherever-Lady said. "So the most you can do is keep your eyes open and make sure no other guests get snatched up."

"In the meantime, I'm taking a nap… walking two blocks really takes a lot out of y- zzzzzzzz…" Old-Man Fanatic said, then fell asleep standing up.

"Don't worry, guys! We'll guard this place with our lives!" Colin exclaimed with a salute. "C'mon, Sailor, lets scout around for more angels!"

"Right behind you, Colin." Sailor Androm3da said, and they ran inside.

"Well, at least we've got some security-" Mickey began to say.

"OH MY GOSH! IT'S THE CAST OF 'THE SECRET WORLD OF ARRIETTY'! CAN I GET YOUR AUTOGRAPHS?!"

"Yep… they're OUR recruits, alright." Old-Wherever-Lady said… then fell asleep standing up.

"This is going to be a stressful night…" Donald sighed.

What they didn't notice was Calvin and Hobbes listening from the alley. "WG and Fanatic are trapped in time?" Calvin gasped.

"That means we can get into the club now, right?" Hobbes asked.

"Are you kidding? They've got two other psycho-authors on duty! …But, we DO have a chance on getting into the club a DIFFERENT way!"

"How so?"

"Follow me… this is our moment to shine!" With that, they ran off.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

FF2 and Max stood on the roof-top, back to back, looking around. "Those beasts could be anywhere, keep alert." FF2 said.

"Why do you think they've come here?" Max asked.

"Like I said, they feed off time-streams, and send people back in time to do so, and sent WG and Fanatic back 35 years,"

Max scratched his head. "They haven't aged well… WG would only be in her mid-50's."

"True… perhaps she wasn't able to write that letter until 1978- being trapped in the past has a way of keeping you from thinking about things like this. But right now, we have to focus on-"

*ZAP!*

"What the…?!" Max looked over the edge, but saw nothing strange. "I thought I heard something."

"Any clues down there?" FF2 asked, looking downward.

"Just two canes on the pavement."

"Good heavens, they're even going after old people! …And if they did it in front of the House of Mouse…" he gasped. "THEY MIGHT BE INSIDE!"

0o0o0o0o0o0

Sailor Androm3da and Colin stood on the catwalk, looking over the audience as Mickey welcomed everyone. "Alright, we just have to keep our eyes peeled for any stone angels, and with us watching the place, they'll be frozen!" Colin said.

"I think they'd be frozen anyway, with such a crowd." Sailor Androm3da said. "Unless there was a way no one could see them…"

"And now for a Minnie cartoon!" Mickey exclaimed.

Sailor Androm3da gasped as the lights began to dim. "WAIT! STOP THE CARTOON!" he shouted, leaping onto the stage as the lights shined bright again, and the crowd gasped. He turned to the famous mouse. "Mickey, we can't turn off the lights or even dim them! If no one can see the angels, they'll be taken back in time too!"

"Hey! Where's the cartoon?!" Timon called.

"Uh, s-sorry folks, but we can't roll any cartoons tonight," Mickey announced.

The crowd booed. "Why not?!" The Reluctant Dragon demanded, pouting.

"Um… well…"

Colin quickly lowered himself down from a cable just then… getting tangled up as he did so. "Because all the cartoons got switched with episodes of _TMZ!"_ he cried out, frantically.

The whole crowd gasped, a few people screamed, and one of the R.O.R fraternity brothers (from Monsters University) fainted.

"So, uh, for some entertainment… here's the Quackstreet Boys!" Mickey introduced instead, and they hurried offstage. "Thanks for the warning, boys. We could've lost the whole audience!"

"It's what we're good at, Mick." Colin said, coolly. "Now lets scout around for those angels!"

They walked off… not noticing a stone-angel standing behind the curtain, its eyes covered.

"HOLY MOLY THERE'S ONE!"

…not noticing- for about three seconds.

"What do we do?" Mickey gasped.

"Stand here, and do NOT take your eyes off it- don't even blink!" Sailor Androm3da said. "We'll search for something to destroy it with!"

With that, the two substitute-guards took off, leaving Mickey with the statue. "Wait, where are you guys-" he asked, turning around for a second, then quickly turned back…

…seeing the angel was smack-dab in front of him, looming over, their face looking demonic and their clawed-hands outstretched.

He paled. "…Minnie… help me…"

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

FF2 and Max were back in the TARDIS, standing at what appeared to be a scanner. "From what I can tell, there's three angels in the club," he said. "We have to find a way to trap them, and destroy them."

"How can you destroy them?" Max asked.

He paused. "I don't know, WG didn't get that far into the series yet. BUT, there IS a trick we can use."

They ran back into the club, spotting a Weeping Angel near the restrooms… and the gargoyles from _The Hunchback of Notre Dame_ were standing by it. "So… you come here often?" one of them asked.

"Guys, don't take your eyes off that angel!" Max warned.

"No problem with that, Max," the shortest one said, smiling flirtatiously at the statue. "This one is a real looker,"

"Yeah, and it can snap your neck, steal your voice, and even send you back in time half a century," FF2 deadpanned.

The gargoyles froze. "Uh, in that case, better call some other gargoyles!" They then took off.

"Very well. GOLIATH!"

Goliath swooped down. "What do you want?" he asked.

"Keep an eye on this Weeping Angel, don't look away or blink at all- these things are deadly."

"Very well." Goliath stared cold-heartedly at the statue…

…and it crumbled to bits. "Wow. I guess it couldn't handle the pressure." Max claimed.

"Don't let your guard down, these things don't die that easily," FF2 said, then swept the gravel-remains into a box, which was made of mirrors on the inside. "This may seal it away. Now to find the other two."

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Daisy came running up to Mickey, frantic. "Mickey, bad news!" she cried.

"I've got bad news too!" Donald exclaimed.

"I've got worse news!" Horace yelped. "The Quackstreet boys are running out of songs, and the audience is wanting more entertainment!"

"Yeah, well the battery running the electricity is starting to wear out which means we'll be cast into the dark, and I can't find the charger!" Daisy cried.

"WG and Fanatic went missing AGAIN!" Donald shouted.

"What are we going to do, Mickey? …Mickey?"

They looked, seeing Mickey was standing stone-still, his eyes taped open. "Don't. Blink." He said slowly, and pointed over at the Weeping Angel.

Everyone froze. "We're doomed." Donald gulped.

Colin and Sailor Androm3da came running up just then… holding laser-guns, sledgehammers, and for some reason 99 bottles of pop. "Alright, we got some weapons- but just in case, everyone drink soda so you'll stay wide-awake!" Colin advised.

"EAT LASER, ROCKY!" Sailor Androm3da shouted, zapping the angel, which turned to dust.

"HOORAY!" Everyone cheered.

…but a few seconds later, it regenerated back into form.

"CRAP."

"Wow, these things ARE hard to beat." Sailor Androm3da commented. "Colin, hand me the sledgehammer, we'll reduce it to rubble and seal it in the freshly-poured concrete down the street… Colin?" he turned around, seeing Colin facing the other way. "Colin, what are you… oh…"

Colin was looking over at a Weeping Angel, who had its face covered. "These things are fast." he put bluntly.

FF2 came running, box-in-hand. "Good news, one of the angels turned into rubble and I sealed it inside this mirrored box and… oh, there's the other two." he said, noticing the situation.

The lights flickered just then, and the angels moved closer about a couple inches. "GAH!" Mickey and Donald screamed, diving into Daisy and Minnie's arms.

"Don't worry, we've still got one of them-"

The lights went out for two seconds, and when they came back on, one of the weeping angels had the box in hand- lights flickered again, and the box was opened, and the third angel stood before them.

"Oh buggah."

"Wait, wait, WAIT! They're facing each other, that would mean they're still frozen if they're looking at each other, right?" Colin pointed out.

"Wrong- this one is facing to the left at a 90 degree angle, while the one next to it is facing the right, and the third still has its eyes covered." Sailor Androm3da said. "But… maybe if we can put mirrors in front of the two that have their faces uncovered, that'll solve one problem."

The lights flickered again… and the third angel was now standing closer to them, its face only half-covered. The others quickly stepped out of the way towards the wall… the lights flickered, and the angel was now standing next to the other two, all of them facing our heroes.

"We need mirrors now that they're all looking!"

"On it!" Colin said, running out into the dining area… coming back with the Magic Mirror from Snow White, the Enchanted Mirror from Beauty and the Beast, and the Looking Glass from Alice in Wonderland (the old TV series… anyone remember that show?). "These might work!"

The lights went out for a second-

*SMASH!*

When they came back on, the mirrors were smashed. "I hope you all have insurance," The Magic Mirror said, darkly.

"Oh… crud." Colin stepped back with the others.

"Stand back!" FF2 said, taking out his Sonic-Screwdriver. "I'll handle these things… you beasts made a wrong move in taking away my girlfriend! Now you're going to-"

The lights went out completely, and everyone screamed.

They came back on…

And to everyone's shock, the angels were facing actual mirrors!

What shocked them more was, behind those mirrors, stood WG and Fanatic- in their youth. "Nice idea with the mirrors, guys." WG said to Colin and Androm3da. "I figured calling you guys for back-up was a good idea."

"What the…?! How the…?!" Mickey stammered. "What happened to you guys?! You were old the last time we saw you!"

"Oh… well those parts of us no longer exist in this timeline, now that we've been brought back." Fanatic explained.

"How were you brought back?!" FF2 questioned.

WG stepped aside, showing Calvin, Hobbes… and their time-machine cardboard box. "Hello!" Calvin exclaimed.

"Here's what happened…" WG began.

0o0o0o0o0o0

**Back in 1978…**

WG and Fanatic looked around. "WHAT THE HECK HAPPENED?!" Fanatic shouted.

"We've, obviously, been transported to a different time… either that or they're re-printing the old Garfield comic-strips." WG noted, holding up a discarded newspaper.

"How?!"

"Don't ask me! I don't just have answers fly right out of nowhere!"

Calvin and Hobbes suddenly flew through a time-portal in front of them. "There you guys are!" Calvin exclaimed, then turned to Hobbes. "I told you making a left near the Jurassic Era was a good idea."

"Calvin? Hobbes? What's going on here?!" Fanatic demanded.

"Everyone in the present said you guys were kidnapped by Weeping Angels and taken to this year, so we came to retrieve you." Calvin said.

"Weeping Angels, huh? I think I know how we can defeat them… but we'll have to go into the future a bit," WG said, rubbing her chin.

"Why?"

"To cheat a bit."

Calvin grinned. "I like the way you think!"

"Well, lets get going then!" Fanatic said, climbing in.

WG looked at the newspaper once more, analyzing the date. "WAIT! Let me do something real quick first!" she exclaimed, then took off.

They only blinked.

About three hours later, WG returned. "Okay, I'm ready."

"What did you do?" Hobbes asked, suspiciously.

"You'll see. LETS GO!"

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

**Present**

"We went forward in the future a bit to ask Androm3da and Colin how the Weeping Angels were defeated and they said we placed mirrors in front of them… so we grabbed some mirrors, came to this exact moment, and voila." Fanatic finished.

"…I am so confused right now…" Mickey said, rubbing his head.

"Get used to it. FF2, being an expert on Doctor Who-related stuff, take these things away, if you don't mind." WG said.

"Will do… I know a lovely room-of-mirrors," FF2 said.

"Thanks again guys for taking care of things," Fanatic said to Colin and Sailor Androm3da.

"Anytime… now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go hang around the cast of _My Neighbor Totoro!"_ Sailor Androm3da exclaimed, rushing off.

"And I'm going to harass the villains!" Colin exclaimed, running off next.

"Looks like we're back on duty," Fanatic sighed.

"Yep… lets take a break first." WG said, and they walked off.

"Hold it!" Calvin called. "Since we pretty much saved you guys from turning into old geezers 30 years early…"

"Can we get an honorary membership?" Hobbes asked quickly.

"Hmmm… Okay, sure." WG said with a shrug.

"HUH?!" The rest of the staff gawked.

"Hey, they earned it. …Plus, you never know- with Calvin around, other freaky things might stay away."

"Because I'm just that awesome?" Calvin boasted.

"No- your ugly face would give them a heart-attack."

"I resent that!"

"Lets just end the chapter, before anything ELSE happens," Fanatic said.

They all walked off… not noticing a fourth Weeping Angel watching from the cat-walk-

"HEY! HERE'S ANOTHER ONE!" Colin shouted, popping up behind it and pushing it over…

*CRASH!*

Androm3da, dressed as a janitor, swept the remains onto a plate, and handed it to Stitch. "Here, buddy- extra dessert."

"Ooooh!" Stitch wooed, then ate the gravel, belching.

The two author-cameos smirked, walking out. "Our work here, is done."

0o0o0o0o0o0

Back with FF2, he finished disposing of the Weeping Angels, then passed by a videostore… backing up when he saw a Fangface DVD poster- claiming to have 50 more episodes than what the series originally had. He walked in, picking one up and looking over the episode lists… noticing most of them consisted of familiar fan-fiction titles, and other ideas he remembered being mentioned.

"Only Wherever Girl…" he chuckled, then walked out.

0o0o0o0o0o0

**A/N: …hey, who wouldn't?**

**Nice job, Colin and Androm3da. …And don't worry, you'll be getting another cameo in the future.**

**Please review. No flames or we'll set Weeping Angels around your house.**


	10. Fan Art Frenzy!

**And now for a new chapter. But, there's one thing I have to say…**

**_This chapter is a reference to all the Youtube and DeviantArt Fan-art/videos made out there (this was written before we came across Tumblr, Twitter and other fan-art sites), and based on what the Disney characters think of them. It is not an insult to anyone's work, just used for entertainment purposes. We apologize if anyone finds it otherwise._ **

**Disclaimer: We don't own anything.**

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

**11:45 PM**

WG quickly ran out to the streets, her hands covering her mouth and nose, as if she were trying to hold something in…

*SPLURGE!*

…and suddenly blood shot out of her nostrils.

_WG: You may be wondering why I'm having a nose-bleed. Well, in case you didn't notice the warning at the beginning of the chapter, a lot went down at the House of Mouse._

**Earlier that night, around 8:13…**

_You see, Fanatic and I have a job of making sure everything stays safe at the house of mouse- making sure no villains pulled anything, keeping out knock-offs, driving crazy fan-girls away, and just making sure nothing dangerous comes along. Well, what we never knew that, while protecting the club that night, we'd also end up having to protect our guests' reputations._

… _Which became difficult the night I let Clarabelle borrow my laptop._

"…which became difficult… the night I let Clarabelle… borrow my laptop…" WG murmured as she typed at her laptop.

Fanatic scratched his head. "Uh, WG? Isn't it a little confusing to be typing the chapter DURING the chapter of which you're writing?" he questioned.

"Yes, but give me a break, I'm behind in my updates."

Fanatic sighed. "Can we at LEAST make something useful of your laptop then? Like look up Transformers vids, AMVs, or trailers for _Grown Ups 2_?"

"Oh fine! I'm going to be stuck with writer's block with you jabbering anyway." she then pulled up Youtube. "Hey, how about if we look up some Disney AMV's?"

"Why?"

"I dunno. Just because we're at a Disney joint and it would fit and we need something to lead to the plot?"

"Oh. Okay."

They began watching an AMV, when Clarabelle came up. "Hi, WG, Fanatic. Say, can I borrow your computer real quick? I need to finish up typing the latest gossip on the Long Lost Eighth Dwarf, Wimpy, and the deadline is tomorrow."

"Oh yeah, sure. Let me close out real-"

"WHEREVER GIRL! FANATIC! WE NEED YOU IN HERE- MALEFICENT AND LADY TREMAINE ARE TRYING TO BEAT UP THE NOSTALGIA CRITIC FOR NOT PUTTING EITHER OF THEM AT NUMBER ONE ON HIS 'TOP 11 DISNEY VILLAINS' LIST!" Daisy shouted from inside.

"OH. MY. GOSH." Fanatic gasped. "…The NOSTALGIA CRITIC IS HERE?!"

"HURRY! WE MUST GET HIS AUTOGRAPH WHILE HE'S STILL ALIVE!" WG shouted, and they raced inside.

…leaving Clarabelle with the laptop…

…while the Youtube page was still up. "Hmm… what's this?" she asked, scrolling through the videos. "Huh? JimxAladdin, Slash AMV?" she clicked the video… and her eyes widened. "(GASP) Forget about the eighth dwarf! THIS is going to be the biggest thing!"

And so it began.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Over the next hour or so, Clarabelle looked up many videos of Disney slash-couples. "Oh, just wait until Ariel finds out Jim is dating her daughter, but is cheating on her with Aladdin-" she said, then clicked another video. "Oh! Jim is dating Ariel too? I wonder if Eric knows!"

She had written down so many things: Jim and Aladdin are going out behind Jasmine's back, while Jasmine is going out with Esmerelda, while Esmeralda is cheating on Jasmine with Cinderella, who's secretly seeing Jim, who's cheating on her with Aladdin and Melody until Cinderella found out and started seeing Prince Eric, who broke up with her to go out with Belle, who found out he was going out with John Smith and dumped him and started dating Jim next, until Princess Aurora dragged her away and…

Good grief, how many Disney crossover-couples are there?!

After watching a lot of videos that included fan-art from Deviantart and spliced-together clips- not knowing NONE OF THEM WERE REAL- Clarabelle shivered with anticipation. "This is going to be juicy! I can see the headlines now: 'Multitude Madness: A Chain of Cheaters- Disney heroes and heroines show a different side to their stories!'."

With that, she quickly ran to her printer.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

**9:25 PM**

"Thanks for signing our T-shirts and 'Kickassia' and 'Suburban Knights' DVDs, Critic!" Fanatic said as he and WG waved to the Nostalgia Critic as he exited off-screen.

"And don't worry- those gashes in your abdomen aren't that noticeable and will heal up quick!" WG assured, then turned to Fanatic. "Well, Fanatic, how about we do a perimeter check just to make sure nothing else is going down behind our backs that could result in complete chaos?"

"Sounds good to me!"

With that, they walked along, passing Clarabelle. "Oh, thanks so much for lending me your laptop, WG! I found out SO MUCH MORE than I expected!" she said, handing the laptop back to the authoress.

"Anytime, Clara." WG said as they continued on, opening her laptop. "I wonder if the second season of Accel World is on Hulu yet… WHAT THE FRENCH FRY?!"

They pulled up the web, seeing the 'Watch History' was up… and there was a whole ton of Disney-slash videos on the list. "Ew, WG, you actually watch these kinds of things?!" Fanatic sneered.

"NO! Someone must have gotten their hands on my laptop and pulled this trash up and-" WG paused, her eyes widening. "Oh my gosh…"

"You know who did it?"

"No- someone made an UrsulaxHades video, how would that work?!"

"…how would any of them work?"

"EXACTLY! But the real question is, who had my laptop long enough to pull up so many-"

They froze, remembering Clarabelle's statement: "I found out SO MUCH MORE than I expected!"

"Oh."

"Dear."

"Muffin."

"Cake."

"WE GOTTA STOP CLARABELLE!" The two authors shouted together, and raced off to find the cow.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

**10:00 PM.**

The authors looked all around the dining area, but saw no trace of Clarabelle. "Oh man, where is she?!" WG stammered. "If we don't stop her, we're doomed!"

"WG, calm down. Just because Clarabelle shows a bunch of pictures and videos- which, I should add, are already on the internet- doesn't really mean we're doomed… just the reputation of the Disney stars."

"Dude, think about it! If Clarabelle thinks those pictures are real, and makes the other Disney starts think they're real, then we're going to have total and complete MAYHEM that will end in bloodshed!"

"Oh, yeah, because so many characters will be killing each other thinking the other is going out with their lover?"

"That… and I might get a nose-bleed."

"But… I thought you said you're not into this stuff."

She gripped him by the shirt. "I'M NOT! I just don't want to risk it… people would get the wrong message and I'd forever be ashamed…"

Fanatic turned to the audience. "You got that, people? She's NOT into it! …but, um, how come we're writing this chapter then?"

"Because it was YOUR idea!"

Fanatic paused. "Oh. Right. …Uh, lets find Clarabelle."

"Right."

0o0o0o0o0o0

Meanwhile, Clarabelle was in the Women's Restroom, sharing her gossip (a little early) with Minnie and Daisy. "And it's all over the internet! Ooh, I just can't wait to release the article!" Clarabelle was squealing, showing them a sample of her article.

"Uh-huh… Clara, I hate to burst your bubble, but these aren't-" Daisy began to say.

"Aren't easy to take in all at once, right? That's what I'm aiming for- something to really pack the thrills!"

"But, Clarabelle, you're going to hurt a lot of people if you show these!" Minnie spoke up.

"Well, the truth has to be let out somehow- it would be more wrong to just keep quiet and let everyone keep cheating on each other."

"No, Clarabelle, what Minnie meant was…" Daisy tried to say.

"I have to go. I'll be on in less than an hour, and there's so much prepping to do!" with that, Clarabelle walked out.

"She wouldn't even let us get a word in! Minnie, what are we going to do?"

"Find the authors, maybe they can help-" Minnie began.

WG then ran in. "Is Clarabelle in here any where?!" she asked, checking the stalls.

"…I guess there's no need to tell you," Daisy said.

"Clarabelle just left. She said she was going to prep for the show." Minnie answered.

"GAH! We gotta stop her! Humiliation is on the lines! We're talking nostalgic scars! The end of dreams! Cats and dogs living together! Mel Brooks making a sequel to 'Robin Hood: Men in Tights'! Mayhem! Chaos! Nosebleeds!" WG was crying out, frantically.

Minnie grabbed her, shaking her. "WG CALM DOWN, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE ANOTHER RESPIRATORY ATTACK!"

WG took in a long, deep breath, and slowly let it out. "Sorry, Minnie, I just don't handle slash-situations well. …Just ask Jim Hawkins and Silver- they paid me to get rid of their slash-fans."

"Who are they?" Daisy asked.

"You mean, who WERE they?"

"Uh… lets just go stop Clarabelle."

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

**10:15 PM. Muffin.**

Fanatic raced around, looking for Clarabelle. "I wonder if I would get more done if I didn't run everywhere and look at one spot for two seconds." he said to himself, looking around quickly as he ran. He then spotted Mickey. "Mickey! Hey! What time does Clarabelle go on?"

"11:00, why?" Mickey asked.

"You can't let her on! Delay her until the end of the show if you can!"

"Why?"

"It's a state of emergency! She's got gossip that'll shut this club down!"

"Oh, no, what now?"

"Two words: Disney. SLASH."

Mickey paled. "WHAT?! I'm going to have a word with her!"

He stormed over to her room, seeing Minnie, Daisy, and WG there already. "Clarabelle! I want to talk to you about this article of yours!" the head Mouse shouted.

"Sorry, no spoilers!" Clarabelle called back, sternly.

"It's no use, Mickey. We already tried talking to her, but she won't listen." Minnie sighed. "She thinks it's all real… and won't stop until she 'reveals' everything."

"Minnie, please! This story is only under a 'T' rating!" Fanatic gasped.

"Well, we have to stop her, otherwise she's going to end up like those Jim and Silver slash-fans WG handled." Daisy said.

Fanatic looked at WG. "They have slash-fans?"

"Not anymore." WG said darkly.

"Wait… Jim and Silver knew about their slash-fans, right?" Minnie asked. "Isn't it possible that everyone in the club knows about these videos and fan-arts too?"

Everyone paused. "…Time to take a survey!" Fanatic exclaimed.

"You stall Clarabelle, we'll handle this!" WG said to Mickey.

Mickey paused. "Why am I left in charge of the stalling?" he demanded.

0o0o0o0o0o0

**10:30.**

Over the next half-hour, everyone went to the tables of everyone who'd be a victim in Clarabelle's article. "Oh yeah, those videos? Yeah, we see them pop up all the time and pick on each other for it," Aladdin told Fanatic.

"Yeesh, me and Ursula? Heh, only in some crazy-fan's fan-art, kid. Now, if you see fan-art with me and Maleficent, then it would be more realistic." Hades told WG.

"They paired me up with Aladdin?!" Jim questioned, appalled, as Daisy told him about it.

"Ugh, we just hate those saucy fan-arts about us," Jasmine said at the Princess table, while the rest of them nodded. "I think a bunch of fan-boys have too much time on their hands."

"It was bad enough they made crossover pairings with me, but could they please leave my daughter out of it?" Ariel said, annoyed, when Minnie informed her.

"They paired me up with John Smith too?!" Jim sputtered when Daisy told him more.

"I can't really criticize the fan's imaginations… but yes, I do find it disturbing in a lot of cases." Belle told WG and Fanatic.

"Disgusting." Maleficent sneered to Minnie.

"Uh… I don't see the chemistry in those pairings at all," Hercules scoffed.

"They paired me up with URSULA?!" Jim shouted, then looked around. "That's it, I'm hiring WG again!"

0o0o0o0o0o0

**11:07 PM. …Strudel.**

Once everyone had been informed, everyone met up by Clarabelle's dressing room with their own notes. "Tell me WHY can't I go on, yet?" Clarabelle was demanding to Mickey.

"Because, uh, the stage is being renovated!" Mickey stammered. He had used every excuse from poor audio transitions, a Goofy cartoon running long, and the last musical act left a hole in the floor. But this excuse aroused suspicion.

"In the middle of a show?"

"Uh… well… you see…"

"We don't want you going on just yet until you have ALL the facts for your article on the fan-art criteria!" Fanatic said quickly.

"The… what?" Clarabelle asked.

"Yeah, all those pictures you showed us were really fan-art others made." Minnie told her.

"We tried telling you earlier. We didn't want you to show them and use made-up stories and hurt everyone's feelings." Daisy added.

"BUT, we decided to help out your article- we went around and interviewed everyone about what they think of all the crossover pairings. We figured you could include them in your article, and let everyone know what THEY think of them." WG put in.

"Yeah, you could call it, 'Fan Art: The Characters Input.'" Fanatic added.

Clarabelle looked at her notes, then theirs. "Oh my gosh… I feel like such an idiot! Thanks for telling me all this. I would've ruined everything!" she said.

"You can go on now, Clarabelle, now that you know." Mickey said.

"Yes, but first, let me get the whole story straight."

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

**11:30 PM.**

"And now with the word on the street, here's Clarabelle Cow!" Mickey announced, stepping off stage as Clarabelle sat on her stool.

"Ooh, do I have a story for you all!" Clarabelle exclaimed. "We all know about all this fan-art that goes around the internet, and how so many fans either love it or bash it. Tonight, we're going to discuss what so many characters think of the fan-art and fan-videos they've been included in! Such as this picture of the Disney Princesses bald- some poke fun at it, but what they don't realize was this was one's fan's way of showing support for cancer victims,"

All the Disney Princesses nodded at the picture when it was shown. Some laughed, but not that much.

"And what is the deal with so many crossover pairings? While the fans think some of them work, the real characters think they're a threat to their REAL relationships- and don't get me started on what they think of the slash!" A lot of characters booed. "Too right! Fans, have any fantasies you want, but leave us out of it! And why is Jim always a victim?"

Everyone watched from backstage. "Well, we managed to save the day once again," Fanatic said. "The crowd isn't trying to kill anyone- and no nose-bleeds!"

"Yeah, we managed to work things out without any setbacks!" WG said.

"…And now, just for a special treat for you ladies out there, some fan-art of your men… in ANIME FORM!"

"Oh no."

On the screen showed an AMV of some anime fan-art of all the Disney guys. A lot of the women cheered, while the guys argued which of them looked hottest…

And WG was holding her face. "WG, what's wrong?" Fanatic asked.

"I forgot! Anime-styled fan-service make my blood rush too! Too… much… it's too much! NI!" she then bolted out the door.

"LOOK OUT! SHE'S GONNA BLOW!" Donald cried.

*SPLURGE!*

Everyone cringed. "And she denies being a fan-girl," Fanatic scoffed, rolling his eyes.

"*sigh* I'll call a blood-donor…" Daisy muttered.

_WG: And from that day forth, I never looked up Disney fan-art ever again. ...For a week.  
_

The authoress lied in the middle of the street, blood splattered everywhere. "Medic…" she groaned.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

**A/N: You were warned.**

**Please review… and please browse fan-art safely.**


	11. We Represent The Hub!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anyone remember "The HUB" network? ...Anyone??

**Fanatic: WE STILL OWN NOTHING! WHY!?**

**WG: I wish I knew.**

0o0o0o0o0o00o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

_~Inside a darkly lit room…(note: NOT Stephanie Meyers' house)~_

A group of figures sat around a table, each with a light on the Table in front of them. One of them stood up, and then began speaking.

"The Council of the HUB shall now come to order." The person said, banging what appeared to be a hoof on the Table.

"Hear, Hear." The others said.

"Today's concern is this invitation which we received from the House of mouse in Toontown."

"WHAT!?" All of the others gasped.

"But that place is for Disney Characters only!" A male voice broke out from the others.

The head of the Council nodded, as a letter floated in the air in front of her. "It states that, 'Due to the Censor Monkey's telling us we should invite characters of other cartoon companies, we have decided to ask you, the most recent Children's television network, to come and visit us at the House of Mouse.' "

"We should send a representative…..I say Chris."

"WHAT DAN!? You can't be serious!"

"Shut up Monkey face."

Suddenly the lights went on, reveling Princess Celestia, Dan, Chris, Blythe Baxter, Raiden Pierce Okamoto, Strawberry Shortcake, Tenderheart Bear, Lucky, Snake Eyes, and Chief Charlie Burns.. At the far corner of the Room, the imposing sight of Megatron with his finger on the light switch, glared at them with a smirk on his faceplate.

"Don't tell me you thought that you could just walk in here, and hold a meeting without me did you?" Megatron asked with a chuckle. "I'm surprised at you all to think that you could slip past Soundwave's sensors."

Celestia growled, while Dan called out. "IT WAS ALL THEIR IDEA! Besides that, Chris dragged me here against my own free will while I was planning my revenge on someone!"

"Dan you don't blow up a plane to get revenge!" Chris scoffed.

Megatron let out a loud laugh. "You actually think I would be mad, upset, but more concerned …you're where the Insecticons sleep you do know that right?"

Everyone looked to see a MASSIVE Insecticon hive, of which all of them were awake...and looking hungry. Hardshell though just looked ticked. "Okay first I get killed off, and now NO ONE WILL LEAVE ME ALONE!" he groused.

The entire group rushed outside as the door closed. Megatron grinned. "And this is why you need to make sure you know where you are holding your meetings." Then he saw the letter lying on the floor, and he scooped it up before anyone could react. "Hmmm." He turned to face Celestia. "Is this real?"

The Princess groaned and then sighed. "It is, we were talking about sending a representative,"

"I accept."

"WHAT!?" Everyone said, suddenly looking angry…until Megatron pointed his gun at them all..

"Remember whose ship your on." He sneered evilly. Soundwave walked up to him and Megatron turned to him. "Get them all off the ship, find me Shockwave.. and then respond to this letter."

"It was actually an E-Mail." Chris pointed out.

"THEN HE'LL RESPOND TO THE EMAIL!" Megatron roared into his face.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0oo0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

And now back to the plot that most of you care about.

Fanatic blinked and shook his head as he stood outside with WG, thankfully he had no plans to cause harm to her anytime soon, and she apologized nicely (referring to that 'Host' chapter). And the Darkwing Duck episodes were in Production order.

"I feel, like something involving a favorite character of mine that will impact the plot later on just occurred." He said to WG and Max.

"You should know." WG said "You're the one who's coming up with the chapter, and the opening which I really don't get…for example, WHAT THE HECK IS AN INSECTICON!?""

Fanatic pointed a thumb at his Co Authoress. "Out of the loop involving Transformers folks."

WG rolled her eyes. "First my boyfriend says I should catch up on Doctor Who, now I gotta look up Transformers stuff."

"Could be worse- you could be forced to look up Twilight." Max joked.

Suddenly Mickey let out a loud scream of shock. "Do you SEE what happens when you mention that God-forsaken series?!" Fanatic snapped at Max.

Within a second, WG and Fanatic had barged into his room, they found Mickey hiding underneath his desk.

"What's the matter boss?" WG asked. "Have the Knock offs returned?"

"I hope not, there not due back until Episode 13 or 14!" Fanatic said to the reader.

Suddenly something crawled across Mickey's desk, a spider. "AHHHHH!" Fanatic shrieked as he jumped in WG's arms. WG deadpanned, and dropped him to the floor. "Seriously guys…a spider?" The spider crawled in front of her. "EEK! DIE, SPIDER!" she then swung a sledge-hammer down upon it, and it stumbled off-set, dazed.

Mickey blinked. "No that's not I'm afraid of, you guys burst into my room like you were some angry Spider Man fans!"

"Not my fault you guys killed him off." Fanatic said.

"I HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH IT!"

"Funny/ Derrick Wyatt said the same thing about the Scooby Doo Mystery Incorporated Series finale."

WG grabbed Fanatic by the scruff of his shirt. "I TOLD YOU NEVER TO BRING THAT DISGRACEFUL SPIN-OFF UP!" She screamed.

"Mommy." Fanatic whimpered.

Mickey sighed, as he pointed to his computer. "I sent this to the Characters at the Hub, and this is the response I got back."

The E-mail was a video, which Mickey than clicked on and it played, showing the Face of Transformers Prime Megaton.

"Greetings insects of the House of Mouse, we at the HUB have decided that some representatives shall be sent to look over your club, as such: Myself, My Communications Officer Soundwave, and My scientist, Shockwave shall be arriving within one week. Until then…" Megatron said and the video ended.

WG and Fanatic just stood at the video, then Fanatic breathed in through his teeth. "We're dead."

"Why? I thought he was one of the good guys." WG said.

Fanatic looked at her like she just took an extra helping of crazy-pills. "Dear lord, woman, you have SO MUCH TO LEARN!"

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Later Mickey was addressing the clubs staff, and he had told them everything, the reactions were what you expect, especially after what happened with Minnie and Fanatics Transformers.

"MICKEY MOUSE! WHY ON EARTH WOULD YOU INVITE AN EVIL ALIEN OVERLORD HERE?! FANATIC'S GUY ROAD HAZARD WAS BAD ENOUGH AND HE WAS A _GOOD_ GUY!" Minnie shouted.

"They'll crush us flatter then I've ever been crushed before….and then they'll take me back and fry me up and then eat me!" Donald said, mainly because he bought tabloid newspapers.

"I'll kill you Mickey Mouse if- instead of them signing my book- they destroy it." Daisy quipped.

"This will make a GREAT GOSSIP THOUGH! 'Mickey Mouse killed by those who were his employees of the club, right before Deceptions raze said club to the ground!''" Clarabelle said happily.

"How do I know that they won't use that magic cube thingy on my projector!?" Horace said, and then at once the rest of the staff began talking and arguing all at once.

Mickey sighed as he turned to face Fanatic, noticing that WG was absent, as well as Goofy and Max. "umm…" Mickey said about to inquire when Fanatic said, "They went to see FF2 and their relatives one last time before getting destroyed."

Mickey sighed. "I don't get it. Why do they act like they are going to get killed? All they have heard is what they have seen in commercials and those live action movies!"

Fanatic smirked. "Actually seeing as how it's Transformers Prime…..its an even bigger problem. But you're in luck Mickey,"

Fanatic then suddenly reached into his back pocket and pulled out all of the Transformers Prime episodes on DVD, and then a laptop from out of nowhere set to the Site. "You've hired a transformers expert!" he pulled Mickey close. "Now, here's what we can do…"

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Less than a week later everything had been set…. Sort of, they had stockpiled enough energon, as Fanatic called it…to power thirteen Unicron's for the next 3,000,000,000 years, and that that energon was just the Welcome Present.

They had made an extra, extra, extra, extra, extra, EXTRA large Table to accommodate Chernabog and all of the giant toons in the club and they would still have enough room to place all of their feet on the table, and everything had been reinforced.

Soon the big night had arrived,. And everyone was really tense though they wouldn't show it.

"Did you know that Cops crack jokes and make strange comments in real life?" Fanatic asked a terrified WG, while he was calm, for some reason given his likening of Transformers, everyone was scared crapless.

"Why?" WG asked, shaking.

"T keep them sane…no really my Real Life Counterpart told me that cops do it to keep themselves sane."

"You're kidding?"

"Nope."

"Huh, learn something new every day… so Fanatic how will these guys show up? Will they fly in like Aladdin does on carpet?"

"No, they will most likely show up on stage."

"…..so why are we here instead of inside the club?"

"That would be a good option wouldn't it?"

Both Authors stood there for a few more seconds and then took off running into the club dashing until they came to the stage where Mickey was addressing the club.

"Hey there everybody, we've got a great show tonight, but that's not all we have some new visitors coming tonight!"

The crowd cheered. "Please let them be anime, please let them be anime…" Arietty was silently hoping.

"Please don't let it be Garbage Pail Kids, please don't let it be Garbage Pail Kids…" Kermit at the Muppets table was silently praying.

"It's Megatron and Shockwave from Transformers," Mickey announced…

…and everyone in the room practically went into shock. (Lambert the sheepish lion practically fainted!)

"Don't worry anyone they are not too dangerous, and Fanatic has assured me that he has everything planned out for their…."

As he finished speaking he heard what sounded like a portal opening. Behind him a swirling green vortex had appeared.

"Mother." Was all that Mickey could whimper.

Minnie, bit her nails; Goofy, looked ready to pee himself; Clarabelle was jotting down notes; WG had her machete ready, and Fanatic…was drinking a Root Beer.

He turned to the reader, "What do you expect? May I remind you of _my_ OC's from last time?"

Soon, a figure emerged from the Vortex, a bright Sliver with Purple Highlights, Red Optics, and a large Purple cannon on his right arm. Followed by a Mech who if he put on a suit would look like Slender man with a screen for a face, and bulky Decepticon with one optic and a cannon for an arm.

Megatron soon stood over Mickey Mouse, towering over him. "Hello there Mickey Mouse, I am Megatron leader of the Decepticon Army, and I thank you for inviting me to your humble club."

Mickey could feel about 1,000 eyes glaring at him. "he he." He said lamely.

Megatron let out a deep booming laugh, and then he gestured to those behind him. "Allow to introduce my Chief Scientist, Shockwave, and my Communications officer, Soundwave."

Soundwave, was noticeably playing Battlestar Galactica on his visor screen, until Megatron growled at him, and he shut it off, and Shockwave just looked over the crowd.

"Well….this is odd, I feel like I stepped into a nuclear waste dump with all of these odds of people with such bright colors, it is illogical for some of these beings to even be alive, furthermore," Shockwave said.

SLAP!

CRASH!

Shockwave rubbed his helm as he had been backhanded into the screen for the club, cracking it slightly. "ow." Shockwave said as he got up and then went to his knees. "Forgive me Lord Megatron."

Jafar turned to Hades. "Where Can I get one of those?" Jafar asked.

"I think at Wal Mart." Hades replied.

Jafar, then pulled out his wallet. "How much are they?"

"How should I know? I don't go to Wal-Mart that much." Hades said.

Megatron looked down at Mickey, "I trust that proper seating accommodations have been provided for us?" he asked.

Mickey raised an eyebrow confused for a second as, while he knew what it meant, he was still on Mickey Mouse Club House mode meaning that big words were challenging for him at the moment.

"He means a proper sized table." Shockwave said.

"I think I see one." Another voice said. The three Decepticons turned to see a Slim Sliver Transformer with wings….half of the girls in the club went:

"SQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUEEEEE EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE, IT"S STARSCREAM AHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

WG Deadpanned. "SERIOUSLY! AM I THE ONLY ONE WHO KNOWS LITTLE TO NOTHING ABOUT TRANSFORMERS AROUND HERE?!" she bellowed. "…and from what I understand…why does Starscream have fan girls?"

"He's the Decepticon version of Loki, that and his Armada Incarnation REALLY set the bar for Fangirlism over Starscream." Fanatic replied.

WG looked at him Shocked and confused, "You know this, and yet you have no shame?"

Fanatic looked down and then dug his toe into the ground, having taken off his shoe for some reason, actually it was to pick at some eczema that the real Fanatic had on his ankle and it ended up on fan-fic Fanatic's.

"I read the fanfics with him in it…I SWEAR THAT ALL! IT SAID THAT IT WAS A BETTER VERSION OF TRANSFORMERS ENERGON!...and I never said I didn't have any shame."

"SAY IT!" They heard Starscream cry.

"ALL HAIL STARSCREAM!" All of the girls screamed. Starscream was performing a very strange dance routine which we have too much dignity to describe…

(Calvin: Since when do you guys care about dignity?)

(WG: Since when are you allowed to interrupt the story?! *kicks Calvin out*)

"OH YEAH THE SCREAMER IS IN THE HOUSE!" Starscream yelled out. Megatron face-palmed, Soundwave was visibly shaking and Shockwave was aiming his gun at Starscream's head.

"WOO!" Fanatic cried happily. "THIS IS GONNA BE FUNNY!" HE then pulled out some Popcorn and began eating it.

BEW!

ZAP!

BOOM!

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Starscream yelled as he flew across the club and into a wall.

"Were doomed." Mickey said. While Fanatic and WG broke down in laughter.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Meanwhile at the Club Entrance, Pete, (who was having his car and entire bone structure fixed after that safe landing on him in the first chapter) was watching and he chuckled evilly. "Well, Well, Well, looks like that Mouse has some destructive machines on his hands." he said. "This is my chance to drive this place out forever- after all they can't have a club without a club."

"MUAHAHAHAHH!" He began laughing and then he turned and saw Starscream's head next to him.

"You know that one boy was right- you really are like my son if I got a fat dog pregnant." he commented.

"GRRRRRR!" Pete growled and he rose his fist angrily. "Why I outta-"

"You'll what? I'm made of metal, you can't hurt, me you cannot even scare me- I am Starscream, and nothing scares me."

Then he was suddenly pulled out of the hole by Megatron. "Starscream, as you have decided to come along with us, you'll be seating with us as well, CLOSELY with us." He snarled.

"H….h….how close?" Starscream whimpered.

WG then walked up to Fanatic, careful not to trip over the fan-girls that were passed out on the floor. "So What now Fanaticiumus Prime Leader of the Autobots?" She asked sarcastically,.

"First off, don't call me that. Second just keep energon in constant supply and whatever you do _don't show them to ending to Dark of the Moon."_

"Why…..and should I be concerned if this is your advice to keep the Decepticons happy?"

"Because Megatron gets his head and spine ripped out, Shockwave gets his side punched out and his eye torn out through his throat, Soundwave gets his head destroyed by Bumblebee and Starscream gets beaten by Sam/ Shia Lebouf."

"Meh. I've written worse in my fanfics- ever see a ghost-werewolf stick its claws through Freddy Krueger and rip him apart, then listen to my sister since a poor parody of a 'Grease' song?"

"And that's why I love discussing violence with you." He said with a teasing smirk, "And whatever you do NOT mention Shia Lebouf to Starscream."

WG snorted and then let out a laugh. "I'd not want to hear that name if another version of me got killed by a former 'Even Stevens' star… yet still, I miss that old series. OH 90's DISNEY CHANNEL, HOW I MISS YOU SOOOOO!"

Fanatic cringed. "And, uh… try not to get emotional over your nostalgic childhood."

Unbeknownst to them Pete had been listening in, a grin on his face. "So they don't like the third movie eh?"

He then pulled out as copy of Transformers 3 and then laughed. "Well then looks like we've got a movie to watch tonight."

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

As the cartoons played Pete up the the projector room where Horace was sitting getting ready to pick the next cartoon. "Now Let's see here hmmm...Mickey's railroad is a good one, but Toy Tinkers is a classic."

Suddenly there was a loud clang, as Horace fell over onto the ground, stars flying over his head. "Tinkle Tinkle little star..."he said before he passed out.

Pete let out his trademark villain laugh as he placed the disk into the projectors DVD slot...and he pressed 'play'. Right before everyone's eyes the cartoon switched the scene in Transformers Dark of the Moon, where Sam stuck a bomb in Starscream's optic, and then his head blew up, followed by Soundwave getting blasted into scrap by bumblebee, Prime tearing Shockwave's eye out through his throat and MEgatron getting his head and spin ripped out.

Everyone was staring at the screen with eyes the size of saucer plates.

Pete laughed. "Ho boy, this is going to get really good!" He said rubbing his hands together as he saw MEgatron stand up, and fling the table onto grumpy at the same time.

":OUCH!" The dwarf yelled out as he was crushed. Megarton stormed up to Mickey who had ran on stage. "Was that your idea of a joke mouse?! BECAUSE IT WAS NOT FUNNY!" Megatron roared at him.

Mickey Let out a gulp. "I can assure Mr. Megatron that it wasn't our intent- you'd have to um take it up with Horace he's the projection manager." Mickey said quivering.

"He lies." Shockwave said and reached into the projection booth. "I have looked up images of this Horace."

Shockwave held Pete up for all to see, the DVD case for Dark of the moon fell from his fingers into Fanatic's hands...he looked pretty peeved off as well. "Okay I can accept that your a villain but stealing from me is crossing the line!"

Pete found Mickey, WG, who had shown up just to beat him up, Fanatic and the Decepticons glaring at him. "Heh...oops."

In less than five seconds Pete found himself flying to the moon.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" He screamed as he crashed landed, where Sentinel Prime stood looking down at him.

Sentinel looked at the audience. "I know he's a loved *Somewhat* villain...so I'm going to eat him just to be a jerk."

"Why are you on the moon anyway?" Pete asked.

"Ironhide Fanboys won't leave me alone." Then Sentinel saw a space ship with said Autobot's fan club inside of it. "AUGH THEY FOUND ME!"

And with that he went tearing across the lunar landscape.

0o0o0o0o0o0

Back at the House of Mouse, Megatron was backstage with Mickey. "Well, mouse, despite that little incident, we have enjoyed our stay." he said. "You have passed our inspection."

 _Oh thank God Almighty, Hallelujah joy to the world!_ Mickey wanted to shout, but only let out a relieved sigh. "Glad to hear it. So, I suppose you'll be coming back more often?" he asked… hoping the answer would be 'no'.

"Perhaps, but right now we're heading to the Nickelodeon area to try to boost the network's ratings with a show that people would actually WANT to watch, rather than another Lord-forsaken Spongebob episode." Shockwave scoffed.

"It could be a while." Starscream added.

"According to my calculations… there's no hope." Soundwave finished.

"Here is our final report," Megatron said, giving Mickey what looked like a report-card.

"An 'A' minus?" Mickey asked. "But, I thought you said you enjoyed yourselves?"

"Do you want me to lower it?"

"Er… still a passing grade."

"Good. Now, lets blow this joint," With that, they left.

"Wow, and we were all scared out of our wits for nothing!" WG commented. "For a moment, I thought something horrible was going to go wrong!"

"ALRIGHT, BRONIES! HAVE AT IT!" They heard Shockwave shout… and there was a stampede as a bunch of Bronies came running to the house.

Fanatic gave WG a glare. "You had to say something, didn't you?" he sneered.

WG only cringed. "I didn't think they were _that_ evil…"

He only face-palmed. "Woman… you have so, SO much to learn… Just go get the riot shields! …Oh, and while you're at it, tell Mickey we need to set up certain character restrictions!"

WG saluted then ran off, while Fanatic whipped out another root-beer and a shot-gun loaded with horse tranquilizers, blasting them at the Bronies and forcing them to drop in the street, snoring.

"The things we do for fanfiction,"

0o0o0o0o0o0

**A/N: All in favor of getting a raise, say 'Aye'!**


	12. Gaston, The Host

**And now for a new chapter. Bring on the funny!**

**Disclaimer: We still own nothing… but if anything's for sale, we'll take it!**

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

*Beep! Beep! Beep! Beep! Beep!*

WG hit the 'off' button on her alarm clock. "Oh my gosh!" she exclaimed, then ran over to the calendar. "OH my gosh!" She then raced down the street, towards the House of Mouse for her Security Guard shift. "Oh my gosh oh my gosh oh my gosh oh my gosh oh my gosh oh my gosh…!"

She reached the club, where she ran in circles around Max and Fanatic.

"Oh my gosh oh my gosh oh my gosh!" she then gripped Fanatic by the shirt. "OH MY GOOOOOSSSSSHHH! *Squee!*" she then raced inside.

"Um… what the heck was THAT all about?" Max asked Fanatic, totally confused.

"Oh, ever since Mickey started to allow cartoons from other networks into the club, WG has been trying to get some of her cartoon friends to come visit," Fanatic said. "And they finally said they'd come tonight."

"Who are they?"

"If you know WG as well as I do, you should know who it is."

Max thought about it, which didn't really take long. "Let me guess: the Fangface gang?"

Fanatic gave a nod. "The Fangface gang."

"OH MY GOSH!" WG exclaimed at the top of her lungs, popping up behind them as she did and scaring them up into the air.

Fanatic was clinging onto a street light for dear life, while Max hung onto a telephone line. "She must be a big fan," he quipped, sarcastically.

"How can you tell?" Fanatic scoffed, sliding down to WG… who was hopping up and down in excitement like a five-year-old going to Six Flags. "Alright, WG, calm down!" he grabbed her by the shoulders… but ended up hopping as well as if he were on a pogo-stick with blonde hair. "Duh! Be! Yu! Gee! That's! Ee! Nuff!"

"I! Can't! Help! It! Fan! At! Ic! I'm! Too! Ex! I! Ted!" WG said, then finally stopped bouncing.

"I know, but PLEASE just calm down!"

"How can I calm down when I'm feeling so UP!" WG's feet suddenly turned into little rockets, and she shot up into the air…

…Fanatic still hanging on. "GAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!"

_Up in space…_

An astronaut was hovering outside his spaceship, when the two authors shot by like a comet. "MOMMY HELP!" Fanatic screamed.

"Uh, Houston? We have a problem," the astronaut said.

_Back on earth…_

Max looked up, blinking a couple times. "Wow… normally Fanatic is the more hyper one," he said to himself, then let out a sigh. "Well, this is going to be one heck of a night."

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Max didn't know how right he was.

Inside Mickey's dressing room, the famous mouse sat at his dresser, Pluto at his side… Yeah, Pluto's in this fic too, didn't you notice? Anyway, the host was quite stressed- well, more stressed than he had been since Chapter One.

Last week, as a way to earn more money to pay for the bills AND because they figured Mickey could use some time-off, the staff came up with an idea for a contest- for ten dollars, any guest could enter their names in order to win the prize of being the host for this week, using any theme, running any of their favorite cartoons, and choosing any kind of entertainment. Well, sure enough, every toon in the place paid up to 10-100 dollars in order to win such an opportunity.

The only downside was, the villains were allowed to enter as well… and one of them won.

"Gosh, Pluto, you think this was a good idea?" Mickey sighed, his voice wavering.

Pluto whimpered, shaking his head 'no'.

"I didn't think so… and it's too late to call it off now. Well… maybe it won't be all bad. At least we've got Fanatic and WG to help… and on the bright side, Calvin didn't win."

"Yeah," Pluto panted.

Mickey looked at his watch. "Time for me to go on… Lets pray nothing goes wrong tonight."

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

"Are they here yet? How about now? Now? Are they here now? Now are they here? What about now?" WG asked excitedly, she and Fanatic having finished their quick space-venture and were back at their posts.

Fanatic was picking chunks of Saturn's rings out of his hair. "No, stop asking." he sneered. "Why don't you go check the perimeter or something?"

"Can't, too excited to move!"

"You're bouncing up and down like a flipping bouncy-ball!"

"Doesn't count. You go check!"

Fanatic sighed, then turned to Max. "Make sure she doesn't leap up and put a hole in Jupiter,"

Max walked over to WG, attaching chains and cinder-blocks to her feet to keep her weighed down. "On it." he said. "Hey, see who won the contest while you're in there, too."

"Will do," Fanatic walked into the club, just as Mickey was announced on stage.

"And now, here's your host for the next minute and a half, Mickey Mouse!" Mike announced, and the spotlight shined on Mickey.

"Hello, everybody! Welcome to the House of Mouse!" Mickey said. "Now, last week, we asked you all to fill out your names and enter our contest to be the next host for tonight! Well, I'd like to say that many of you would be great at the job, but there's only one winner…"

"GET ON WITH IT!" Iago shouted… and Genie zapped his beak so that it was strapped shut with duct-tape. "Mmf!"

"Thanks for that, Genie. …Well, without further ado, say hello to your host for the night (drumroll, please)…"

Hewey tapped his sticks on the drums.

"Here he is… Gaston!"

Gaston then stepped onto the stage.

The reactions were typical: A lot of people did spit-takes, many gasped, some shrieked, his three fan-girls swooned while Lefou held up a foam finger with his name on it, and Belle and the Beast gave each other worried glances.

Oh, and Calvin was miffed. "WHAT?! NO FAIR! I DEMAND A RE-COUNT! THIS WHOLE THING WAS RIGGED! THIS IS TYRANNY! I OUGHTTA-" he was shouting… until Genie zapped his mouth to cover it with duct-tape too. "Mmf!"

"Thank you, Mickey. I can assure you that this will be a good night to remember," Gaston told Mickey, patting him on the back. "After all… No one can host a show like Gaston."

"Oh, brother…" Minnie muttered from backstage.

"Well, Gaston, now that you're host, what kind of theme do you have in store for tonight?" Mickey asked.

"What else? Hunting." Gaston said, and the audience gave a gasp- and it was no surprise Bambi's Mom ducked under the table. "Now, now, everyone it's not what you expect- I'm talking more about the dangers of hunting and how to keep safe. …For example, take this Donald cartoon!"

A cartoon rolled of Donald going hunting, only resulting in Chip and Dale getting the better of him.

Backstage, Mickey was having a talk with Gaston. "You really had me worried there, Gaston… I thought you were going to cause harm!" he said.

"Nonsense! I may be a villain, but I still respect the way you run this club to help show everyone a good time and keep your guests happy. There's nothing I want more than to serve our guests with great entertainment in a worry-free environment!"

"Oh, good. I'll be in my dressing room if you need anything," With that, Mickey went into his dressing room.

Gaston's grin shifted into an evil smirk, as he placed a chair in front of the door to keep Mickey trapped. "There's nothing I'd want more than to run this club safely… except to fulfill my plan to hunt down every kind of beast in this club- starting with Belle's!" With a malicious laugh, he walked off.

…Not noticing Fanatic had been listening from around the corner. "WHEREVER GIIIIRRRRRRLLLL!" He screamed, running outside. "Wherever Girl! Wherever Girl! Where for art thou Wherever Girl?!"

"Wuh-oh, Fanatic's using Shakespearian code, this must be bad." WG said… being chained down, super-glued, and stapled to the ground, while Max was using a welder to secure the chains into the concrete.

"What's going on?" Max asked, turning off the welder and lifting his mask.

"WG, we've got a major-league problem!" Fanatic cried.

WG gasped. "They ran out of Popcorn Shrimp?!"

"NO! Gaston won the award of being the host… And he just announced his evil plan to hunt down the Beast, and any other creature!"

"OH NO! Bambi's Mom!"

"Darn right Bambi's Mom! What are we going to DO?!"

"Okay, this is simple- he's a host, right? And, like that episode where Pete tried running the club, he thinks it'll be easy, right? Well… we WON'T make it easy for him, he'll decide to quit, Mickey will be back in charge, and then the problem will be OH MY GOSH THEY'RE HERE!"

The Wolf Buggy pulled up, and out stepped the Fangface gang: Biff, Kim, Puggsy, and Fangs. "Hey, guys, how's it- why is WG tied down like a deranged animal?" Biff asked.

"You really have to ask?" Puggsy quipped.

"Guys! I'm so happy you came!" WG stated the obvious.

"BUT, we've got a BIG problem!" Fanatic spoke up. "Gaston won a contest and is now the host for tonight, and he's planning on killing anyone with fangs!"

"What?!" Fangs gasped.

"No, not you. He meant he's going to kill anyone that's a beast… INCLUDING the Beast." WG cleared.

"Oh, great… the night she persuades/threatens us to make a cameo, and it includes a villain trying to whack off anything with fur." Puggsy sneered.

"Why would he do that?" Kim asked. "I mean, I thought the villains here called a truce."

"Only when Mickey's the host! He'll kill anything that is or close to a beast!" Fanatic scoffed.

"…Except those who are beasts on the inside," WG said, then looked at Puggsy. "So you're safe."

He gave her a glare. "Are you going to spend this whole chapter insulting me?" he questioned.

"Ah, I'm just kidding." she then turned to the audience. "Not. …You guys head inside- and make sure Fangs stays human!"

"What do you mean? I'm as human as the next guy!" Fangs scoffed, thumbing at Fanatic… though looked at him and lowered his hand. "…okay, bad example."

"C'mon, we have to make sure catastrophe doesn't strike… which it probably will… but that's why we're security guards!" WG said, then ran into the club… her shoes still stuck in the trap Max had tried to seal her in.

Max looked at it, then sighed. "Next time, I'll just seal her in cement." he muttered.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Meanwhile, Gaston was meeting up with LeFou. "Alright, LeFou, you know the plan." he whispered.

"Sure do, Gaston! They won't know what hit 'em!" LeFou chuckled, then paused. "Um… What was the plan again?"

The villain rolled his eyes. "We lock up all the members of the staff, so none of them can stop us!"

"Oh, right! I got it! …But, why are we doing this? Won't we get kicked out of the club if we get caught?"

Gaston grabbed him by the collar. "Which is why we WON'T get caught! Now get going!"

With that, they split up.

Gaston went back on stage. "Now, for your enjoyment, here's the Red Queen reciting some poetry!" he announced, as the Red Queen stepped on stage.

"(ahem) Mary, Mary, quite contrary, how does your garden grow," The Red Queen was saying. "With silver bells, and copper shells, and red, UNPAINTED, rose."

A few audiences clapped, the queen's deck of cards cheered loudly. "Boo!" the blue caterpillar sneered.

The Red Queen fumed. "OFF WITH HIS HEAD!" she was then ushered off-stage quickly.

"Eh, yes… well, lets be glad she wasn't reciting limericks." Gaston said. "Now, to stick to our theme, here's a Mickey, Donald, and Goofy cartoon!"

"Hit it, Horace!" Minnie said in her walkie-talkie, then turned to Gaston as he walked over. "Oh, Gaston, have you've seen Mickey anywhere? I haven't seen him since your introduction."

"Yes, Minnie, I think I saw him go in his dressing room there." he pointed over to a door… which had a paper star taped to it, with the word 'Mikky Mowse' written on it.

Minnie arched an eyebrow, walking over to the door. "I don't recall his dressing room being here…"

"Oh, well, he moved out of his other one- something about seeing another spider… and WG using her laser-vision to try to kill it, missing a few times."

"Oh, well that makes sense… though I would think everyone knew how to spell his name right- it was part of the theme of the 'Mickey Mouse Club' a long time ago." she walked into the room… and Gaston locked the door behind her. "Wait a minute… this is the broom closet!"

The star fell off, revealing the title, 'Closet'. Gaston snickered and walked off.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

"Are you sure he's in there?" Donald asked as LeFou led him and Daisy to the stage, opening a trap door.

"Oh, yeah. Mickey went down there to check on the new elevator they put in, but it got stuck halfway up and he needs help getting out." LeFou told them, pointing down the trap door. "See, he's riiiight there."

Donald and Daisy leaned over to look down. "I don't see-" Daisy began…

LeFou kicked them both down the trap-door, then ran off laughing!

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

"Oh, Goofy! Could you help me with something real quick?" Gaston called from around the corner.

"Sure, Gaston, what do you need help with?" Goofy asked.

"Just hold still…"

*Clack! Clack! Clack! Clack! Clack!*

He walked off… leaving Goofy stapled to the wall. "Hey! What did you need help with?!"

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

"Minnie! Donald! Goofy! …Daisy, even?!" Fanatic called as he, WG, and the Fangface Gang looked around. "Crud, where is everyone?!"

"Lets go get Mickey, he should still be stuck in his dressing room like you said!" WG said.

"Why didn't we check there, first?" Puggsy questioned.

"Hey, I'm writing under pressure, here! Just keep an eye on Fangs! C'mon, Fanatic!" The two authors took off.

Puggsy turned to Fangs, who was wearing sunglasses… with actual pictures of the sun printed on them. "Pugs, can I take these off now?" he asked.

"No."

"But it's hard to see!"

"I could tell that when you mistook Cinderella for Snow White. Now, c'mon, lets look around for the staff."

Fangs and Puggsy searched with Biff and Kim, looking around the tables, asking a few characters if they've seen anything, but getting nowhere.

Gaston then stepped on stage, now that the staff at been captured. "Alright, everyone, I have an important announcement." he said. "Tonight's musical entertainment, O'Mally and the Alley Cats, has been cancelled."

"Oh, that's a big surprise! I think I might have a heart-attack and die, from not surprised!" Timon scoffed… and was smacked upside the head by Iago.

"Stop ripping off my lines!" Iago snapped.

Gaston grinned. "Instead, in order to fit our theme, a few friends and mine have found a new source to entertain you all… mostly, ourselves." he announced, then took out his gun. "Tonight, my fellow hunters and I are going beast hunting! Anyone who is or is friends with a monster shall be hunted down and captured! …with the exception of my fellow villains, of course."

"Oh, crap!" Fanatic gasped.

"You go get Mickey and find the others! I'll deal with the antagonist!" WG said, quickly shoving Fanatic off while she approached Gaston.

"Let the hunt begin!" Gaston announced, and a few other villains/hunters grabbed their own weapons, letting out a few battle cries, while the rest of the crowd fled to safety. Gaston smirked, searching the crowd for signs of the Beast… until a laser-blast shot by, an inch from his face.

"HEY GAS-HEAD! OVER HERE!"

He turned, seeing a very angry WG, her eyes red and ready to fire lasers. "I forgot about you. Shouldn't you be outside keeping knock-offs away?"

"My job is to protect this club and everyone in it… and that includes kicking your butt!" She zapped at him again, but he dodged. "Hold still so I can fry you!"

Gaston pulled out a small pistol, shooting at WG-

*Thunk!*

She got hit with a tranquilizer dart, which she plucked out. "Nice try, but it's going to take more than one dart to-"

*Thunk! Thunk! Thunk! Thunk! Thunk! Thunk! Thunk! Thunk! Thunk! Thunk! Thunk! Thunk! Thunk!*

Several more darts were shot into her. "…that'll do it…" she then collapsed on the ground, and Gaston kicked her off the stage.

Puggsy and Fangs stood in the middle of the room, as the crowd ran around frantic. "What's going on?!" Fangs asked, taking off his sunglasses.

"The host for tonight went nuts, that's what happened!" Puggsy said. "We gotta find the others and-"

"GANG WAY!" Baloo cried as he and a few other animals made a stampede to the nearest exit, trampling Puggsy as they did.

"…find a medic…"

Fangs helped his now-flattened friend up. "Ooh, ooh, we gotta get outta here!" he said, looking around, his eyes falling on a poster for _The Princess and the Frog,_ which happened to have the moon on it, and he began to spin.

"Oh, no-o-o-o-o!" Puggsy cried, spinning along with his friend who still had a hold on him.

"Arrroooooooo!" Fangface howled, after he stopped spinning, and began shaking Puggsy. "Gotcha now, Pugs!"

Gaston had leaped off the stage to finish off WG, when he noticed the werewolf. "Now that looks like a good prize for my wall!" he said, then took aim…

*WHAM!*

…until he was hit over the head by a frying pan. "You leave our friend alone!" Kim snarled after hitting him.

"Puggsy! Fangface! Run!" Biff shouted as he picked up WG, and the gang took off.

Gaston rubbed his head. "I'll get those meddling kids for that!" he growled, and ran after them.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Fanatic managed to free Mickey. "…And he's trying to kill everyone!" he finished saying as he and the mouse ran around, looking for the rest of the staff.

"I figured that already," Mickey said. "I haven't been in this much trouble since we aired _Mars Needs Moms!_ Where's WG?"

"Last I checked, she was about to brutally dismember Gaston… heck, he's probably curled up crying somewhere even as we-"

They stopped when they found the Fangface Gang, with an unconscious WG with them, Fangface pulling out the last of the tranquilizer darts out of her face.

"…never mind."

"Anyone got a plan?" Puggsy asked.

"Yeah- wake up WG and stop Gaston!"

"Why can't you stop him?" Mickey asked Fanatic.

"Dude, he has a whole gang of villains on his side- and taking them out isn't fun when you do it alone! I'm going to call in back-up!" he then took out a cell-phone, dialing.

While he was on the phone, Mickey turned to the Fangface gang. "Do you guys know how to help?"

"Don't worry, we've handled worse. We need a plan, though," Biff said, thinking.

"Excuse me… but, I have a plan." came a voice, and they looked over to see Belle and Beast, Belle being the one who spoke.

"Belle! Beast! You're alive!" Fanatic said, hanging up the phone.

"We managed to sneak off back here while Gaston was busy with WG. We knew he was up to something the moment he stepped on stage, and I did some investigating," she took out the ballot-box for the competition, opening it up. "Look, every paper in here has Gaston's name on it- he cheated!"

"I KNEW IT!" Calvin shouted, running by.

"So what's the plan?" Kim asked.

"Well, Gaston is trying to hunt Beast and a few other creatures, and everyone is too scared to stand up to him and his goons." Belle explained. "We just need to find a way to get everyone on our side and fight back… and there's one thing we can do that will make them angry enough to do so,"

WG came to. "Ugh… did I miss the bus…?" she asked.

"Take it easy, WG, you're still a little delusional," Puggsy said. "Well… more delusional than usual."

"Okay, mommy…" she then zonked back out.

"C'mon, lets go stop Gaston already," Beast said, cracking his fists. "I have a bone to pick with him… and maybe a couple lungs, a liver, a spleen, and a throat."

WG weakly raised her hand. "Don't forget his manhood…!"

"Okay, lets cut to the next scene already!" Mickey said quickly.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Gaston searched through the crowd… when he saw Fangface and Beast running by. "You're mine now…" he said, taking aim and firing, but they managed to dodge. "Drat!"

He kept shooting, they kept dodging, until finally…

*BANG!*

"OH MY GOSH!" Fanatic cried. "HE SHOT BAMBI'S MOM!"

Everyone froze, gasping, as they looked over at the mother deer, lying on the floor, covered in blood (no one noticing a bottle of ketchup hidden behind her). "Oh… not again…" she groaned.

"Mother? Mother!" Bambi cried, kneeling by his mom.

His father walked up just then. "I'm sorry, Bambi. But your mother can be with you no more." he said, sadly.

Everyone turned and glared at Gaston- and believe me, you haven't lived until you received a death-glare from a baby deer.

"I-I didn't mean it! I was aiming for the Beast, I swear!" Gaston stammered.

"The only beast I see here is you!" Kim shouted.

"Yeah! You killed Bambi's Mom… I'm not even that evil!" Chernabog snapped.

"Heck with this hunt! If it involves reliving the most tragic part of my childhood, I'm out!" One of the hunters cried, throwing his gun down.

"Ditto!" The rest cried.

Gaston backed away, running for the first exit… only to be intercepted by the now-free staff. "Going somewhere?" Minnie asked, very crossed.

He turned and ran for the next exit, where the Fangface gang stood, the werewolf growling. He looked around, seeing no way out… then saw WG staggering out, and he grabbed her. "NO ONE MOVE! Otherwise, the boy gets it!" he shouted.

"She's a girl!" Fanatic called.

Gaston did a double-take, looking at WG. "Really? …Well, no matter! One move, and I'll blow her head off!"

"If my body wasn't half-numb and my vision wasn't blurry, I'd make this guy pay for turning me into a damsel in distress," WG slurred, as Gaston dragged her towards the exit.

"Pardon me… but would you let my girlfriend go?" came a voice from behind him.

Gaston turned and gasped, seeing FF2 behind him, along with another author-friend, Tracker. "Why should I?"

"Oh, well because…" FF2 then transformed, turning into his werewolf half, Silver. "I'm going to throttle you."

"Me first," Tracker said, then kicked Gaston upside the jaw, releasing WG.

Silver then lunged and swung the hunter around, slamming him into the wall. "I just remembered something!" WG gasped.

Gaston grabbed his gun, aiming it at Silver. "That's it! You're all on my hunting list!" he shouted… until he felt a tap on his shoulder, and he looked…

…seeing that WG had transformed into her werewolf-half, Stalker. "About time I appeared," she said to the audience, then grabbed Gaston by the throat. "THIS is for the trouble you caused." she slammed him onto the ground. "THIS is for trying to shoot my favorite cartoons," she swung him into a dining cart. "And THIS… is for trying to take me hostage!" She then threw him across the room, where he crashed into the wall.

"Gaston, from now on, you are BANNED from the House of Mouse!" Mickey declared.

"I'll take if from here," Beast said, dragging the villain outside, Belle following… there were sounds of violence, until he walked back in, brushing himself off.

The others looked outside, seeing Gaston in a beaten and bloody state. "Good grief, Beast! That's enough to bring this fic up to an M rating!" Fanatic gasped.

"What are you talking about? I just held him up- Belle beat him up,"

Everyone looked at Belle, who shrugged. "What can I say? No one tries to kill the love of my life," she said.

"I here you on that," Silver said, putting his arm around Stalker.

"Okay, next scene before the romance makes me vomit!" Fanatic said quickly… and Tracker nudged him.

"You hush," she said, then turned to the others. "So, what are we going to do, now?"

"Well, first of all, we're going to hire you guys as back-up security guards from now on." Mickey said.

"Especially since WG is still a little loopy," Stalker said, then began to revert human. "Whoop, looks like it's affecting me, too…"

"Speaking of which…" Puggsy held up a picture of the sun, turning Fangface back into Fangs.

"What happened? What did I miss?" Fangs asked.

"The less you know, the lower your therapy bill will be," Tracker told him.

WG stumbled after transforming back, and Silver caught her. "You okay, WG?" he asked.

"...yeah, just need to go lie down for a bit," she said, trying to walk down the hall, swaggering left and right. " _It's a small world, after all…"_

Everyone looked at each other, and shrugged.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Once the mess was cleaned and everyone was assured that Bambi's Mom was really alive, everyone in the club was given a free apologetic gift basket, a continental dinner, and free therapy sessions… as well as getting to beat up the villains who tried to hunt them.

After the club was closed, WG met the gang outside. "Well, sorry for the trouble tonight, guys." she told them.

"Hey, we're just happy that psycho is gone and no one got hurt," Biff said.

"We'll see you next week!" Kim added, and they drove off.

"Well, that night could have gone better," Fanatic said.

"Yeah… well, at least next week will be better," WG added.

"How do you know?" Tracker asked.

"Because… I invited the Minions over!"

Suddenly, a swarm of minions ran over, carrying Fanatic off while cheering. "Whoooaaa!" he cried.

"FANATIC!" WG ran after them.

FF2 and Tracker looked at each other, shaking their heads. "Working here is going to be quite interesting…" FF2 said.

Tracker nodded. "…You think we could get the cast of _A Monster in Paris_ to come, next?" she asked.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

In the alley, a shadow fell over Gaston's unconscious form.

An evil chuckle is heard as a figure passes by, and suddenly Gaston is gone.

All that's left is a large footprint with a logo on it.

The logo read: _Tempus._

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

**A/N: Dun dun DUUUUUN….**

**Review.**


	13. Falcon Trouble

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I recommend reading Fanatic's "Darkwing Duck: The Movie!" fic. That is all. XD

**We own no Disney characters.**

**Fanatic: *is holding The Golden Falcon's Copy right* MY PRECIOUS!**

o0o0o0o0o00o00o00oo0oo0o0o00

"Yep, this is definitely the work of a bird." WG stated as she looked at the hallway.

"It had been a Normal night at the club...HAD being the word here. Fanatic had gone to patrol the perimeter but when he came back… or should we say _didn't_ that got everyone curious and-"

SPLAT!

"I hate these things." Tracker said as she threw Narrator Smurf out of the club on his white keister "So anyone got any leads as to who did this?"

"Nope." Said FF2, walking up with Mickey,

"We've interviewed everyone with a a bird with sharp claws, we even looked at Transformers G1 Soundwave." Mickey said, and he and FF2 turned around showing claw marks bite parks, punch marks and Bite Marks.

"As you can see he's defensive, especially since Fanatic promised HIM a story arc."

WG slapped her forehead. 'DEAR LORD HE TOOK THAT JOKE SERIOUSLY!?" She snapped. Both FF2 and Mickey nodded yes. "Geez…"

"Anyway..." Said Daisy. "Let's get back to the subject- what exactly happened here?"

They looked at the hallway, which was torn up, dented and had what appeared be a brown, meaty, spicy-smelling substance splattered all over the wall.

"Garwsh!" Goofy said. "Poor Fanatic he must have been KILLED!"

"I doubt we're that lucky." Donald said under his breath until Tracker smacked him. "HEY!"

WG walked over to the wall and placed her hand on the brown substance. She sniffed it, and pulled some of it off and licked it. "Hmm..." She said.

"It's a burrito" She said in a poor Mexican accent. "And judging by the claw marks I'd say that it would have to be an anthropomorphic Falcon wearing a Golden Suit of armor called the Golden Falcon who is mad at Fanatic and wants revenge."

Everyone looked at her in wide eyed Shock.

"Well that didn't take long." Tracker said.

"How did you figure it out so fast?" Goofy asked.

WG showed them all her phone with a text from Fanatic..

"HELP I'VE BEEN KIDNAPPED BY AN OC THE GOLDEN FALCON WHO WANTS REVENGE SO HE KIDNAPPED ME AND SPLATTED MY BURRITO AGAINST THE WALL HE'S LOCKED ME IN A CRATE THAT SMELLS LIKE FARTS THANKS TO MY BURRITO... and I'm 90% sure I'm in the prop room the script to Treasure Planet 2 is here and it looks AWESOME!

Love Fanatic. P.S Tell Soundwave I've got his story arc done."

"Well, looks like we've got another author in distress." Tracker said.

"Who was the first?" Daisy asked.

( _A flashback of Sailor Androm3da and Colin running from deranged hamster over-lords wielding chainsaws is shown, the other authors pursuing with advanced weaponry.)_

. "Long story." FF2 replied.

"Just then Minnie ran…" came a voice

"GET OUT OF HERE!" WG shouted as she hit Narrator Smurf with a crochet mallet, sending the blue moron flying out the door again.

"MICKEY," Minnie said with alarm. "The guests are getting attacked by some weird Falcon in a Gold Suit!"

"Oh gosh, he's going after Darkwing too!" WG said. She looked at Tracker and FF2 and she grabbed her boyfriends arm. "Come on, we need to get moving!"

"Wait what?" Tracker demanded. "Where are you two going?"

"We're going to go and beat the ever loving snot off a Falcon...why?" WG said.

Tracker gave her a deadpanned look. "But I have every Gun Imaginable why am I not coming along?"

"Because you need to find Fanatic!"

"He's trapped in a crate yelling HELP he shouldn't be that hard to find."

"Yeah, but that basement is huge! …Plus your name IS 'Tracker'." WG shouted as she dragged along FF2. "Now, come my love-interest! We have a Falcon to fry!"

"Well I'm off." Tracker said as she pulled out a gun...only for it to suddenly get taken away. "WHAT THE…?!"

Everyone looked up to see the Censor Monkey placing a censored Bar over her gun. Than she felt he gun pack being removed as well.

"What's going on here?" Mickey demanded. "She needs those to get Fanatic back!"

"Well she will be doing it without guns." One of them said.

"Guns are bad they kill people." another said.

"Cannot allow it." said another.

"Simply can not." said another.

"Will never allow it." They said and they zipped off.

Tracker saw Red and she grunted with anger. "Stupid Adam Lanza and his stupid spree and the stupid stupid stupid GAHHHH!" She said and she stormed off.

"Gosh what now?" Goofy asked.

"I guess it's up to us to save Fanatic." Mickey said. He turned to Daisy, Minnie, Horace and Clareabelle. Daisy prepared to say something but Mickey cut her off.

"Horace, you're in charge; Minnie try and get Tracker her guns back; Daisy stay off the stage; and Clareabelle no writing about this." Mickey said as he grabbed Donald and Goofy. "Let's move!" And with that Mickey, Donald, Goofy and Pluto all ran off.

Daisy grumbled as she followed the others to their shifts. "Leaving the horse in charge while there are more girls, typical." she muttered.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o00

**_SCREECH!_ **

The Golden falcon swooped overhead of of the guests once again and landed on a catwalk his eyes scanning the seating area. "Where are you you meddlesome Duck.. AHA!" he exclaimed.

HE swooped in low ready for the kill...except for one thing.

It wasn't Darkwing.

"Umm NegaDuck, LOOK OUT!" Bushroot exclaimed.

The Alternate Darkwing just pulled out a shot gun and aimed it at the Falcon. "SUCK LEAD JERK FACE!" he shouted and let off a few rounds.

But the Golden Falcon just grabbed him and threw him at Ariel, Eric and Melody's table.

"Mother," Melody said. "I think this ducks a little underdone."

The Golden Falcon screeched once again and flew over the crowed, dropped Marahute his phone number and flew back into the wings… right as WG and FF2 burst in.

"ALRIGHT LET'S ROAST THAT BIRD!" WG shouted.

Half of the fowl in the club fainted. including all of the members of F.O.W.L.

"He he, Sorry force of habit."

"So where is he?" FF2 said as he looked around.

They heard a screech as he crashed in front of them and stood two feet taller than FF2.

"You were looking for someone?" The Falcon asked with a sneer.

WG looked him over. "Well you got taller… although that would be biased measurement compared to me." she commented. "I don't get it. You were about the size of Launchpad, if an inch taller… what happened?" .

"I got an upgrade." The Falcon said with a grin as his right arm melted and became a chainsaw.

"Okay could he do that before?" FF2 asked WG.

"Nope.. but if he really thinks that it can make a difference," she said with a grin. "THEN HE'S GOT ANOTHER THING COMING!" She shouted as she pulled out her machete and slashed his arm.

CRASH!

Make that...she tried to and her machete broke. She stared at the shattered remains and so did FF2 as the Falcon just stared at them both.

"Are you quiet done yet?" The Falcon asked.

"Nope." FF2 said, whipping out a bo-staff and attacked The Falcon, only to be socked in the mouth and tossed onto Eric's family's table.. again.

"Is this going to be a running gag?' Ariel asked.

The Goldon Falcon let out an evil laugh as he dove at FF2 ready to rip him apart...until that is WG jumped onto his back.

"GIDDY UP YA FALCON! YAH FALCON!" She shouted, placing reigns over his mouth and steered him up so he crashed into the ceiling.

WG however crash landed on Ariel, Eric and Melody's table. Eric began looking around. "There has to be a target on this thing." he sneered.

FF2 pulled WG out of the table. "Are you alright?" He asked, concerned.

"Been through worse.. MUCH worse… did I ever tell you bout the Time Fanatic drank pop and tried to rebuild the Titanic of of swords Knives and other sharp objects?" She asked.

"Okay maybe… but right now we have to find a way to stop this Falcon guy. You said he's Fanatic's OC?"

"Yeah from DARKWING DUCK THE MOVIE!" WG shouted.

"Why did you just shout that?"

"Because Fanatic wrote this and likes to use the CAPS lock… muffins."

"Ah Okay, so how is he defeated?"

"Well Okay what happens is-"

**WE INTERRUPT THIS VERY IMPORTANT INFORMATION FOR A TEN-SECOND COMMERCIAL BREAK!**

**In a time where all hope is lost, where a dark villain is lurking in the shadows, only one can save him… (image of Falcon and Darkwing facing each other, epically).**

**Darking Duck: THE MOVIE! (A Fanatic97 Production)**

**We now return to our regularly scheduled drabble.**

"…and that's it." WG finished.

"Okay..." Said FF2. "So all we need to do is get Darkwing to help us defeat him."

"Right." WG said. "HEY DRAKE!" She shouted into a bull horn only for Launchpad to walk up. "eh Sorry guys no can do. DW's out for the night. DW from _Arthur_ is trying to sue him for using her name!"

"Your kidding me." FF2 deadpanned. "Who would ever listen too that brat?"

"Somebody does." WG said with a grunt.

"Wait Launchpad you fought the Falcon in the movie so you can help!"

"Are you kidding me?" Launchpad asked. "I'm getting out of here! That bird KILLED ME." He than tore off his flight jacket revealing a Hawaiian T-Shirt. "Uhh let me know when this all blows over!"

And with that he ran off, but tossed the keys to the Thunderquack to them.

WG looked at FF2. "You thinking what I'm thinking?"

"I think so WG, but how are we going to get Sam and Max to appear in our _'Warners: Unleashed'_ story?"

"Well… that too."

They then heard a screech and they looked to the Falcon flying at them-- his arms literally lasers!

"YOU’RE DEAD AND YOU JUST DON'T KNOW IT!" He shouted.

The Two authors began running for their lives.

"Was he like this is the story?" FF2 asked.

"Not really… okay a little, but since this isn't a full fic we can't flash Mr. Goldmember there that much."

FF2 gasped. "WG, language!"

0o0o0o0o00o0o0o0o0o00

Meanwhile in the prop room Mickey and the others were searching for Fanatic.

"FANATIC!" Donald called out. "FANATIC!"

"(Whistile) HERE FANATIC HERE BOY!" Goofy called.

"Ah this is getting us now where he could be anywhere!" Mickey said with a grunt and he kicked a crate.. only for a pile to fall down reveling Fanatic in a leather Jacket, Black pants, shoes a Black Shirt and wearing sunglasses on the other side.

"Well gawrsh, that was easy." Goofy said. "HEY-A FANATIC!"

Fanatic turned and he suddenly raced off.

"Gosh maybe I scared him."

"Doesn't matter AFTER HIM!" Donald cried.

With those words the brave idiots- I mean heroes chased after Fanatic.

…little did they realize the crate read: "WARNING: EXPERIMENTAL CLONE 7-25, DEFECTIVE. DO NOT OPEN! (Calvin, this means you!)"

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Back with Minnie, she was trying to reason with the Censor Monkeys. "You must understand, our security guards NEED weapons in order to protect everyone!" she argued.

"Sorry. They'll have to learn how to protect people without them," One monkey huffed.

"What if someone broke into the club, who HAS weapons, but no one could stop them because THEY had no weapons?!"

"People over the ages have learned how to handle it with their brains," Another monkey replied. "It's not like some big, ferocious monster is going to break in, or anything."

"(ahem)" came a voice.

"The censor monkeys turned… and in their sight was a tall, ferocious creature that-"

The she-wolf present grabbed Narrator Smurf, squeezing him tight. "Ruin this story any more, and I'll find out what happens when someone chokes a smurf!" she snarled.

"Uh… bye!" With that, the little smurf ran off.

She turned back to the monkeys, who were frightened. "So… since you Obama supporters don't think we need guns, how about if I just use my claws and fangs to handle things… or would you change your mind and agree that weapons ARE required to handle dangerous situations?"

The monkeys let out panicked shrieks and handed the guns to Minnie. "We can take the threats… but saying we support Obama is going too far!" one of them snapped, then ran off crying.

"Huh, I never thought the authors would include political bashing in the story, too." Minnie replied, then turned to the she-wolf. "And you would be…?"

"Oh, I'm Tracker- in my werewolf form, Tracker." Tracker replied, then grabbed her guns. "Now… what was I about to do?"

*BAM!*

FF2 and WG ran in just then. "The Falcon got an upgrade! We need help!" WG cried.

"And lets hurry- my TARDIS is double-parked!" FF2 said pointing outside.

(Outside, the TARDIS was taking up two parking spaces, with Pete driving by. "OH COME ON!" he was shouting)

Just then, the Falcon arrived- breaking through the ceiling. "HA! I'VE GOT YOU NOW!" he shouted.

"Uh, dude… you were right outside the door. Why did you break through the ceiling?" WG asked.

"Because… well… more for the sake of dramatic entrance, NOW SHUT UP WHILE I KILL YOU! …AND STOP USING THE CAPS LOCK SO MUCH, YOU'RE GETTING AS BAD AS FANATIC!"

"Before you do, can I say something?" FF2 said.

"What?"

He pointed downward. "Your fly is open."

The Falcon looked down, gasping. "Oh dear evilness! How embarrassing, and I was flying all over the club destroying things!" he zipped his fly. "Thank you. …Now then-"

He looked, seeing- while he was zipping his pants up- that they had all took off.

"OH FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!" he then raced off after them.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Back in the basement, Mickey, Donald, Goofy, and Pluto were trying to get a track on Fanatic, Pluto sniffing around trying to find his scent… then his face turned green and he passed out. "I think we're getting close- I'M starting to smell him!" Mickey said, turning green as well.

Donald and Goofy donned gas-masks. "Same here," Donald said.

"Fanatic! Yoo-Hoo! Where are you?" Goofy called.

"I'M IN HERE, SUFFOCATING FROM MY OWN BODILY ODOR!" came Fanatic's voice… from inside a crate marked: 'Ship To Madagascar'. "HURRY AND GET ME OUT! THE FLIES EVEN DIED!"

Quickly as they could, they grabbed the crate, pried off the top-

…which turned out to be a mistake.

*PHOOOOOM!*

A large green cloud shot throughout the basement. Several bats dropped from the ceiling, dead from the stink.

Fanatic popped out next, taking in a breath of air. "Air! Fresh air!" he wheezed. "Thanks guys, I thought I'd never breathe again! …Guys?"

He looked around… seeing that they had been blown flat into the wall, their pupils dilated, noses bent upward, and having stunned expressions. (Like Donald in that episode where Pete stuck Pumbaa in the air-duct, fed him stink-bugs, and then Donald had to rush him outside… man that was funny).

Pluto, thankfully, was wearing a clip on his nose and was still conscious, pulling up a respirator. "Thanks, boy. Lets revive these guys, quick… we've got an OC villain to dismantle!" Fanatic said.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Speaking of the Falcon, he was once again in the air. "Where are those idiots?" he groused.

Tracker snuck over to a table, where the Looney Toons were sitting, then whispered something to Elmer Fudd and Yosemite Sam, pointing upward. "Woo doggy! That's a big one!" Yosemite cried.

"I got dibs!" Elmer said, and they both raised their guns.

*BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM!*

The bullets only bounced off the armor… though the Falcon still found it annoying. "OH GOOD GRAVY! NOT AGAIN!" he shouted, swooping down and getting out of the line of fire. "Bad enough I always have to go through it during Hunting Season." He landed on the stage, looking around. "Now where…"

A spotlight shined on him just then, and WG- dressed in a tuxedo- stepped up. "And now for your musical entertainment, THE FALCON!" she announced, then patted him on the back. "Break a leg, dude- don't let your public down!" and she rushed off.

The Falcon stared at the audience, awkwardly, feeling nervous (even the most fearsome villains get stage fright). Music began to play, and he tried to ad-lib. "Uh um… _Oh, I would fly a thousand miles and I would fly a thousand more, just to be the villain to fly two thousand miles just to see you fall… da da dum! da da dum! da-radada-radada-radada…"_

As he sang his poorly-written lyrics, the audience booed, and an onslaught of veggies, fruit, pies, and unidentified processed meat at the villain, forcing him to shut his beak.

"IS THAT ALL YOU'VE GOT?!"

*CRASH!*

Someone threw an entire refrigerator at him, and the door swung open and he stumbled out, off stage. "Everybody's a critic…"

Shaking off his daze, he ran to find those pesky authors and kill them once and for all (oh how _original…_ not!). He ran backstage, searching for them, using some heat-seeking goggles to track them down…

"Phone call for the Falcon!" FF2 called, holding up a phone. "It's the Disney Studio- they said you've won the honor of being declared an actual villain and they're going to give you a better movie deal."

"Oh, really?" The Falcon grabbed the phone… not noticing the lit fuse that was the cord. "Hello?"

*KA-BLAMO!*

Luckily the Falcon's suit was also explosive-proof… though now it was slightly blackened, as well as any exposed part to his face. "…why did I fall for that? In fact, WHY am I falling victim to all these mediocre tricks?! I'm smarter than this! I am the FALCON! The most dangerous threat to all! The greatest villain in history! The nightmare for heroes! The… the…"

He paused, looking over and seeing WG was mimicking him behind his back! She stopped, seeing his death-glare, smiled innocently, gave a wave, then took off.

"YOU LITTLE BRAT! YOU'RE GOING TO REGRET DEGRADING MY CHARACTER!" he ran after her, taking a sharp turn-

*CRASH!*

Ending up falling victim to Cartoon Cliché #101: Crashing into a brick wall.

"I despise pointless fillers…" he groaned.

FF2, Tracker, and WG ran to the basement while the villain was trying to get rid of his headache. "Okay, lets go help find Fanatic now," Tracker said.

"You mean like I asked you to do half an hour ago?" WG sneered.

"Asked me? You TOLD me to do it while you and your boyfriend could run along and throw caution to the wind!"

"Is there any other fun way for a couple to spend their weekend?"

Tracker rolled her eyes. "Lets just go,"

They ran to the basement, but by the time they reached the bottom steps, the Falcon swooped overhead, landing in front of them, every piece of lethal arsenal artillery aimed at them. "I've had enough of your games! Prepare to die!" he snapped, then fired-

*KA-BLAM! BANG! POW! ZAP! SPARKLE SPARKLE SPARKLE! CRACK! SNAP! POP! BADA-BOOM! OTHER EPIC SOUNDS!*

Once the smoke cleared, all the Falcon could see was a crater where they had last stood, and then began to laugh manically. "I did it! I've finally did it! I'VE KILLED THOSE AUTHORS!" he shouted.

"Missed." Tracker said, popping up behind him.

"GAH!" The Falcon jumped high enough to hit the ceiling, then turned to them. "What the…?! How the…?! Why are you still alive?!"

"Classic Cartoon Gag #155: Making the antagonist believe they have the heroes defeated, only for the heroes to pop up behind them, unscathed." FF2 said, pulling out a novel labeled 'Da Big Book of Cartoon Tricks'. "Seriously, if they just re-aired the classic cartoons, we wouldn't have to explain all of this."

"AAARRRRRGGGHHH! Enough with the slapstick! I'm killing you, and I won't stop until I do!"

"Boy, does this guy need a hobby." WG quipped.

"ENOUGH WITH THE HUMOR!"

"Sorry, it's the genre of the story." Tracker replied.

The Falcon broke out his weapons again. "No more one-liners! You die now!"

FF2 looked at his watch. "Uh, hold it. We've still got another five minutes to spare." he said.

The Falcon fired, and the authors dodged. "Hmmmm, I don't know why, but I think he's mad at us," WG quipped.

The Falcon approached them. "Say goodbye, you idiotic twits!" he growled.

"Oh, are they going on a trip?" came a voice, and the Falcon turned around, seeing Fanatic standing there, along with Mickey, Donald, Goofy, and Pluto. "Because, last time I checked, we weren't booked for any vacation time yet."

The Falcon glared. "You can't stop me! I am undefeatable! My suit is invincible, and has every kind of weapon ever made!"

"…it also has an off-switch." Fanatic pointed at a little button on the Falcon's suit.

The villain blinked. "Was that there before?"

"It is now," Fanatic hit the button, and the suit shut down, rendering the villain disabled.

"Curse your humorous yet lazy solution!"

"Now, what shall we do with him?" Mickey asked, and the authors all grinned.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

"LET ME OUT! I CAN'T BREATHE!" The Falcon shouted, having been sealed away in the same box he put Fanatic in… which hadn't aired out yet. "The vapors are KILLING MEEE!"

Everyone exited the basement, while Mickey went on stage and announced the villain's defeat.

"Well, glad all that is over with," Minnie sighed with relief.

"Yeah… but, there's still something I can't figure out," Goofy said, scratching his head. "If Fanatic was locked away in that crate… then who was that other kid we ran into?"

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Back in the basement, that 'kid' was walking along a line of crates, seeing a whole row full of other 'defective experimental clones'.

He grinned.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

**A/N: And there's another cliffhanger for you! …Boy, we're just throwing out a lot today, huh? XD**

**Please review. No flames or I'll eat you!**


	14. Part A: Fanatic97 VS Hater79

**WARNING: These next two Chapters are MAJORLY extreme and have less comedy and more action... so enjoy!**

**We own no Disney Characters… (But Fanatic owns our main villain!)**

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0oo0o0o0o0o0oo0o

_~Down in the Prop room~_

The Fanatic look-alike from last chapter stood before a row of crates, his eyes gleamed red as he looked at the crates.

"Soon." He said in an electronic voice. "Very soon."

From behind him a swirl of shadows appeared along with a set of glowing red eyes. From within the black mass a voice spoke.

 ** _"Is everything in place?"_** It demanded in a booming raspy voice.

The Fanatic look-alike turned around, not even fazed. "Of course my master, with the other authors down here, it will leave him open to attack… and I will not be performing the clone cliche, instead an open assault will catch him off guard. After all, why should I ruin his name and _then_ attack?"

The voice chuckled. **_"This is why I keep reviving you, you always know exactly what needs to be done with the boy!”_**

The Fanatic look-alike laughed. "Of course I do! After all…” He put on sunglasses. “I am _practically_ him already."

 ** _"Do what you must. I cannot not keep this open any longer without being detected. Good luck."_** And with that the shadow faded away. The Fanatic look alike turned around and beamed at the crates. He raised his hand which glowed bright blue and he held it high.

The crates began to glow blue as well and the lids fell off, revealing more Fanatic look-alikes. Some were complete, others were just robotic Fanatic's without synthetic skin, some with half the skin, and others without.

"It begins and ends tonight!" The Fanatic doppelganger said with a grin. "And I'm not gonna laugh cause it's too cliché.”

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o00o0

Outside the club the authors were standing outside as usual, there was just one problem...

WG looked around with a ticked off look on her face clearly growling about something, her face turned red and tan she screamed out, "WHERE THE HECK IS HE!?" She shouted causing everyone to jump.

Max looked at FF2 and Tracker. "Um.. who is she looking for?"

FF2 looked at his brother. "Fanatic. They made a bet recently and he lost, so he owes her a night off from security duty."

"What was the bet?" Max asked.

"That she could watch one episode of Transformers of her choosing, based off the titles she looked up, and not get confused… she chose an episode in the middle of the season of Transformers Prime."

"So basically she knew that she wouldn't get it and faked him out then." Max guessed. "That is GENIUS!"

"Yeah, it would be… YET HE WON'T SHOW UP!" WG bellowed causing an earthquake in Japan.

"Calm down, I'm right here." A voice said. Everyone turned back to see Fanatic, wearing his usual attire...except that he now had a leather jacket and sunglasses.

"About freakin' time! You were supposed to be here half an hour ago! Give me a reason why I shouldn't-"

FF2 held a muffin in front of her, instantly calming her down.

"…I'll let it slide THIS time. *munch munch munch*."

"Never mind that. Guys I need your help-- there is a problem in the Prop room!" Fanatic responded.

"Now what is it?" Tracker asked. "I've been here only a few weeks and already we've had to go down there five times, Once for the Falcon, one time for the ghost, the other time because Goofy got stuck on a firework, and another time because Dreadwing from TFP got mixed up and lost!"

"Look, I _know_ that the prop room has been a source of a lot of things going on, but there is a major problem down there! I found something so important that it could determine whether or not we all die young!"

"I've dealt with these things before, so I can handle it Fanatic." FF2 replied. "So what is it?"

"Disney's planning on giving Justin Bieber a TV series!"

Everyone's eyes went wide and Max promptly fainted… and I think an old man had a heart attack across the street.

"WE CANNOT LET THAT HAPPEN!" WG shouted as she flung Tracker, FF2 and Fanatic over her shoulder. "TO THE PROP ROOM!"

*BAM!*

She crashed through the wall… instead of using the door… and ran past Daisy who just looked at them. "*Sigh* A typical night as usual." she said, shaking her head.

WG than kicked in the door open to the prop room and deposited everyone on the floor of the stair landing, and whipped out a flame-thrower. "Alright where are they?" she demanded.

"Where are what?" Fanatic asked, backing toward the door.

WG and the others turned toward him. "Umm what are you doing?" Tracker questioned.

"What am _I_ doing, what are _you_ doing?" Fanatic stated as he grabbed the door.

"We are looking for the stuff about a Bieber Fever TV show to destroy it!' WG exclaimed.

"Oh yeah.. I LIED!" Fanatic slammed the door before any of the authors could do anything more. His arm then turned into a blow torch and he welded the door shut, than bolted it, and he took a giant slab of diamond and glued it to the wall in front of the door!

'Fanatic' laughed as he press a button on his wrist changing his clothing black and he took off his sunglasses, his eyes glowing red. "Now that they are taken care of time to find my worthless counterpart." he said to himself.

He suddenly hard a metallic clicking, he turned to see the REAL Fanatic holding a cybertron laser rifle. "Worthless huh? Then how come it didn't take me that long to track you down?" The REAL Fanatic scoffed.

Upon finishing the sentence he let loose a large blast from the cannon that struck the FAKE Fanatic dead center in the head, knocking it back a few feet. The fake Fanatic looked up some skin torn off, revealing a robotic skull but the Synthetic skin quickly grew back over it.

"You came prepared tonight. Tell me, why is that you allowed me to trap the others instead of letting them help you?" He taunted as his right arm became a chainsaw blade, the other forming the barrel of a chaingun.

Fanatic put away his blaster and pulled out two blades akin to the ones TFP Wheeljack used. "Because _Hater79_ , this is my fight and I’m not letting you harm them… besides they can take care of themselves. You'd be surprised what FF2 can do with dynamite."

"So be it." Hater said his optics glowing red through his glasses. "NOW PERISH!"

Hater charged toward Fanatic and the author responded by meeting his charge, chainsaws and blades crashes together with Fanatic blocking Hater's chainsaw blades; but Hater in return raised his chaingun arm ready to fire, but Fanatic jumped down and upper cut him causing the blasts to enter the ceiling. Hater growled and kicked Fanatic knocking him back.

Fanatic got to his feet and in no time was charging once more. Hater raced forward and then to the side to try and confuse Fanatic for a side attack but the author just threw one of his blades- it struck the robot right into the part where the shoulder was connected to the torso.

Hater stumbled and looked at his shoulder- the blade had cut in deep, sparks flew and some energon dripped out. Pulling out the blade he tore it in half with his bare hands, he looked up to see Fanatic jumping into the air, and the author decked him in the face.

Hater stumbled as Fanatic's feet hit the ground he was on the move again and this time upper cut the robot in the chin. Hater flew back as Fanatic readied another punch-

Until Hater grabbed a hold of his arms, keeping them from going any further.

"You're improving. Who knows? You may actually put up a good fight this time." Hater sneered.

Fanatic lowered his eyes. "May?" he deadpanned. And with that he decked Hater, sending the clone falling to the floor.

The Author raised another fist to punch him again, but Hater jumped back up and turned his arm into a blaster. He fired off several rounds while Fanatic charged once more, raising his blade to the side and sliced across Hater's arm where the elbow would be, metal tore against metal as the blade broke alongside Hater's arm.

Hater roared in pain, as Fanatic smashed the blade hilt into his head, knocking him against the wall. Hater grunted as he looked up. "Oh tonight's gonna be interesting." He remarked as he grabbed his arm and forced it back into place. He got up and raised his fists. "Ready for more?"

"Yeah." Fanatic said with a smirk...as he pulled out a giant mallet.

"Okay, now that is just pushing it---"

*WHAM!*

Hater went sailing across the room, into the wall and out the next one, landing next to Clarabelle Cow.

"Fanatic, what are you doing busting through walls like that?' She asked. "You do realize that you could have hurt me and would have made me miss my gossip corner tonight- the only part of the show that really matters."

"OH SHUT IT YA OLD WING BAG!" Hater shouted.

Clarabelle stepped back offended. "Why Fanatic!"

"HEY HATER!" Fanatic called. "PILE DRIVER!" The author screamed as he jumped ready to slam him but Hater caught him and proceeded to bash him into the wall, much to Clarabelle's confusion.

"Two Fanatics...EQUALS TWICE THE STORY!" She cried out in glee, whipping out her notepad.

Fanatic slumped slightly in Hater's grip as he looked at him. Hater than grinned and reared his fist back and punched him. Fanatic flew back and wiped some spit from his mouth, but looked up as Hater charged once again to deck him once more. Fanatic blocked his arm with his own and twisted Hater around. A metallic *thud* sounded out as Hater's head smashed into the ground.

Hater suddenly got up and sucker punched the Author in the gut. Fanatic heard a *crack* from one of his right ribs. He stumbled back and Hater socked him once more knocking him into a wall. Fanatic groaned as Hater grabbed him by the shirt.

"Any last words?" Hater asked.

"None that aren't under an M rating!" Fanatic sneered.

"Smart kid." Hater mocked, and punched him once more.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o00o0o0o

"MICKEY, MICKEY, MICKEY, MICKEY, MICKEY, MICKEY!" Clarabelle shouted as she ran until she saw the mouse and Pluto and Minnie.

“Clarabelle, what’s wrong?” The famous mouse gasped.

"MICKEY, MICKEY, MICKEY, MICKEY, MICKEY,MICKEY!' She shouted in his face.

Mickey grabbed Clarabelle. "Calm down Clarabelle! Now what seems to be the matter?" he demanded.

"Mickey, I have big news! Big big big big big big _big_ news!"

"As big as news as when The Autobot Acree was feeling sick and you claimed she was pregnant and Megatron was the father?" Minnie sighed.

"Or that most of the patrons were holding a Frank Welker voice actor reunion?" Mickey stated.

"Or what about when you said Ron Stoppable was Deadpooll in disguise- and let's not forget the SLASH thing." Minnie added.

"Ruff ruff, bark woof," Pluto put in.

"Trust me Mickey, I may have had my flops in the past, but I assure you I saw what I saw- why it even called me an old wind bag!" Clarabelle told them.

"I think Elmer Fudd called you that." Minnie pointed out.

"FANATIC HAS A TWIN!"

"What? Clarabelle you've made up stories in the past, but that just sounds ridiculous."

"Well Minnie." Mickey said, thinking back to the last chapter. "That would explain where that Fanatic looking kid in the prop room came from… tell you what Clarabelle, I'll look into this matter myself."

"Oh no Mickey you shouldn't! They are having a family dispute at the moment. Why Fanatic even tried to pile drive his twin.. he uh.. failed miserably I might add." Clarabelle said, cringing at that last part.

"Clarabelle are you sure you didn't mistake WG for a boy again?" Minnie asked softly.

"WG's not a boy!?" Clarabelle gasped, utterly shocked.

Mickey face palmed. "This had better not be our next running gag." He muttered under his breath.

"MICKEY!" Horace shouted as he ran in. "Fanatic and uh.. another Fanatic are tearing up the club!"

"WHAT!?" Both Mouse's screamed.

"Told ya so." Clarabelle boasted.

"What have they been doing?" Mickey demanded.

"Well actually not much. I just came down here after I saw Fanatic fly into a table and the other one ready to attack him...really I just said it as precaution considered his already destructive behavior."

CRASH!

"GET BACK HERE SO I CAN MURDER YOU!" They heard one Fanatic shout.

"Good precaution." Mickey put bluntly.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o00

Fanatic dove under an empty table as laser blasts scorched the surface. As he hid Hater smashed down onto it and ripped it in half...to see the barrel of Fanatic's gun pointed at him.

Hater grunted as he looked at the seven now angry dwarfs. "What?"

"You know what? You knocked us over!" Doc snapped.

"Really well then.. SHOVE IT UP YOUR TAILPIPE!" Hater roared in their faces.

After he said this Fanatic came flying and kicked him to the floor, knocking him flat, but he once again got up and began grappling with the Author. His arm shifted into a taser and he got Fanatic in the chest. The author screamed and stumbled back.

He then found a fist flying at him, with a loud *CRACK* Fanatic hit the ground. He moaned as he stumbled to his feet coughing, and Hater kicked him in the gut once more.

Fanatic stumbled once more but he managed to block Hater's fist and flipped him over, sending him crashing down on The Mad Hatter and March Hairs table. "Is there tea in there?" He asked pointing at Hater, and he opened the robots mouth and… pulled out a teacup.

"Why by Jove, so there is!' The March Hare exclaimed.

Hater just stared at them with an angry, 'WTF?' expression.

He stumbled to his feet just as Fanatic sucker punched him once more, but this time Hater grabbed the fist, an angry glare on his face and he twisted it down slamming him into the floor. Fanatic moaned as Hater lifted him up, his optics glowing bright red again.

But Fanatic was once again ready and kicked and nailed Hater in the side of the head, knocking it to the side; he grabbed his head and smashed it against the Mad Hatter's table and then he threw Hater back into Aladdin and Jasmine's table.

Jasmine shrieked as she stared at Hater, his head clearly having been twisted around 180 degrees and his spin should have broken.

"If I was human.. THIS WOULD HURT!" He shouted, then stood up and twisted his head back around and turned… right as Fanatic decked him once again. This time he wrapped his hand around Fanatic's wrist and his arms and twisted it, this time there was another crack, and Fanatic grimaced holding back a yell.

"Aladdin do something!" Jasmine cried. "I think that Fanatic is about to get killed!"

"I would Jazz, but I can't tell who is who!" Aladdin admitted.

" _Really_ , Aladdin? REALLY!?" Iago criticized.

Suddenly Fanatic's eyes burst opened he tore his arm from Hater's grip. He looked around, he knew that this fight would devastate the club at this rate… so he did they only thing he knew he could do.

He ran.

He tore out of the club so fast that there wasn't even a trail of dust, leaving everyone and Hater surprised.

"Boy he's agile for someone's who had an arm cracked and a couple of ribs broken." Hades pointed out.

Hater let out a growl and his entire left arm shifted, the clothes flowed back as part of the synthetic skin as his arm transformed into a large BFG, Cybertronian style. His right arm became a machine gun with bullet trail. "Right. He thinks he can run… well he's got another thing coming-"

"Excuse me." A voice said. Hater whipped his head around to see the Censor Monkeys.

""You are the most violent person we have met." One of them said.

"Yes you have clearly made this story beyond K rated." Another pointed out.

"Are your weapons even legal, and how do you know Fanatic 'Mr. I can just destroy whatever I want'?"

"You ought to resolve your conflict peacefully; after all violence is never the answer." All of them said.

*BOOOM!*

All three Censor Monkeys, and their table had been reduced to a pile of ashes, though the Censor Monkeys ashes had eyeballs. Hater smirked and than turned to the others. "Let me make one thing clear: _Mess in my affairs again.. and I'll let you in a little secret,"_ he warned.

His large gun suddenly filled up with a green substance and he let loose a shot that struck a cartoon hamburger on Jafar's table, making it melt; much to everyone’s shock it was a real life looking liquid...it could be only one thing...

"Oh my gosh, it's DIP!" Maleficent shrieked in horror.

Hater grinned. "I guess it’s not so secret after all..." And with those words he raced out of the dining area, heading backstage as he looked around searching for Fanatic. "WHERE ARE YOU!?"

No answer.

"Huh, becoming _Starscream_ are we?"

Still no answer.

His large BFG became a laser gun once more and he began shooting wildly destroying everything he saw a maniacal grin on his face. "COME OUT COME YOU WHEREVER YOU ARE!" He taunted. "COME OUT GIRL!"

"I'M NOT A GIRL! …'sides you locked WG in the basement!" Fanatic retorted--- forgetting that he was supposed to be hiding. "...crap."

"That was a girl?" He asked, then shrugged. "Anyway…" he suddenly activated a pair of rocket-boots and jumped to the catwalk to see Fanatic holding another blade, along with his gun. "Oh I walked right into this one!" Hater deadpanned as Fanatic let lose another blast, forcing him back to the wall.

"Yeah, you're kind of dumb that way." Fanatic quipped.

Hater let out a roar and flew forward, but Fanatic dodged and began running up the catwalks, but Hater flew up to the top one as Fanatic came running up there. "Oh slag." Fanatic gulped.

Hater grinned and then decked him, knocking him into the railing. Fanatic looked over the edge and he saw the club patrons down below with Mickey trying to keep everyone calm. The Author looked and Hater held back a grin. He then bashed him downward, and Fanatic heard a crack in his nose.

The Author stumbled up his nose was now broken. He stumbled as Hater smacked him and then blasted him with a low level pulse. "Fanatic, I'm ashamed- first you run away and now you're barely fighting at all… did you really think that you could get away from me?" The robot teased.

Fanatic stumbled up his hand still firmly gripped around his gun. "I wasn't running Hater.. it's called _strategy_."

He pointed his gun towards something and fired.

Hater heard something break, and he looked just in time to see a steel beam come down. He didn't have time to avoid it and it smashed into his right arm, crashing to the catwalk and tearing his entire limb off, the gun that it had formed exploding shooting fire out!

From the stage below Mickey saw the blast. "What the…?" He gasped. He looked at the crowd. "Nothing to worry about folks! Just uh, some minor technical problems..." He then looked off stage. "Minnie, tell Clarabelle to get her act ready..NOW!"

Hater stared at his arm and both he and Fanatic felt the catwalk buckle. Before anything more could be said, the Author charged and slashed Hater across the face with his blade, then punched him. "I'm shocked that Tempus didn't do some re-wiring to your systems, otherwise you may have seen THAT coming." Fanatic scoffed as he drove his sword into Hater's other shoulder blade. Sparks flew and Hater let out a roar, as Fanatic kicked him and forced the blade out.

Hater stumbled back and stood up his sunglasses knocked off and his optics showing. "You cannot stop it Fanatic… it has begun… my arrival is just the beginning… he is making it through without your detection... my master will triumph and you will be powerless to stop-GUH!" he grunted.

He looked down. As he had been speaking, Fanatic had driven his blade directly through his chest, out the other end. The Author twisted it slightly, and then he raised his gun up to his chest. "Hater..you talk too much!" He yelled and fired!

*POW!*

Hater's body flew backwards and it crashed into the catwalk as it began to shake; it buckled and twisted, and the wires began to snap.

"Oh I should have thought of this…" Fanatic said, bluntly. He then felt the thing tilt, and he saw Hater's body slide off and crash into the catwalk below, and then it slid off that one and then hit the railing of the one below that one!

Finally Fanatic saw it slide off the last one, and it began falling to the stage below, Hater's optics flashed once and he grimaced up at the Author. He then raised his arm up and it turned into a gun. "YOU HAVEN'T WON!" He shouted and, before Fanatic could react, he fired.

*BANG!*

0o0o0o0o0o0o

"And now for my last story, as many you have seen, there are two Fanatic's roaming around the club- okay more fighting than roaming- and I am here to give you the inside scoop on just what is going on." Clarabelle was announcing on stage during this time.

Before she could begin her fabricated story about the robot being born alongside the Author with Walkt Disney as the father, with his heart was placed in a robotic body because of Fanatic going insane… Hater crashed down next to her!

"What the…?' She said and looked closer.

Hater had energon leaking everywhere; one arm was missing; his face was carved up; there was a massive hole in his chest; and an optic was missing… and yet he grabbed her chair and stumbled to his feet.

…right as the catwalk and Fanatic crashed down behind him!

Hater whirred around, a grin on his face that said, "You don't want to know what I've done to this kid- let's just say I've given him the TOUCH one too many times." He then raised his arm which turned into a chainsaw blade.

Fanatic grunted and pulled himself up, covered in cuts and bruises and he had a sprained ankle as well… oh and he was bleeding somewhat. He glanced up at Hater.

"TIME TO END THIS ONCE AND FOR ALL, THE WILL OF TEMPUS WILL NOT BE DENIED ANY LONGER!" The robot roared and brought his blade down, only for it to be shot off.

Hater growled as he looked up to see who took the shot… and his jaw dropped.

There stood Tracker with her shotgun; next to her was WG, being supported by FF2, and they all looked to be in the same condition as Fanatic was.

"WHAT?! HOW ARE YOU ALL ALIVE!" Hater demanded.

"We'll explain the whole 'Authors vs. Clones' scenario in the next chapter," WG sneered. "And buddy… you owe me another new machete!"

Hater glared, then raised yet another blade. "How about THIS one?!" he then ran forth.

That did it. Fanatic snapped up and grabbed his head and kneed him in the 'unmentionable area' and smashed his head into the ground. "NO ONE TRIES TO KILL MY FRIENDS!" He roared and he smashed Hater's head into a wall. "NOBOD, DO YOU HEAR?!"

Fanatic than raced backwards and he threw himself and Hater into an electrical box just offstage. "NO!" Hater shouted as his back crashed into it, a power surge shot from the thing as it zapped and sparked; he tried to get free, but Fanatic held him there.

Hater's screams echoed all across the club as his systems fried. He gave a final glare at Fanatic before his system crashed and he slumped forward.

The others raced back. "Fanatic, that was AMAZING!" Tracker exclaimed.

"Dude that was AWESOME! Gimme five!" WG shouted happily and raised her hand, but he didn't move. "…Fanatic? Hey, don't leave me hanging!"

"Fanatic…? What's wrong?" FF2 asked.

Fanatic turned towards them… and what they saw was the most horrific sight.

Hater's hand had become a blade and had broken off… buried into Fanatics' side.

"F-Fanatic?' WG asked feeling tears welling up.

The young author suddenly hit his knees and fell forward bleeding heavily from his side.

"NO!" WG shouted in despair at the sight. "NO… FANATIC!"

0o0o0o0o0o0o00o0

From within a dimension of shadows a figure watched Fanatic fall and Hater die.

**_"Well now Hater… looks like your mission is complete. Shame that you couldn't be there in person… luckily you can at least watch."_ **

The figure turned his head towards a rack of tanks full of energon, and one was drained and slid open… and the _actual_ Hater79 stepped out.

"Well?' Hater asked. "Did it work?"

**_"Yes… you did well, Hater, stabbing him before your systems shut down was tricky, but you pulled it off… but do not get too excited. He has been through worse as you and I both know."_ **

They both looked at the screen.

**_"We shall begin the next phase of our plan… as soon as we get word that Fanatic97 is indeed DEAD!"_ **

They both grinned, watching as the other authors grieved over their friend, FF2 draping his jacket over him and scooping up his body, as Tracker put an arm around WG, both women sobbing as they all walked off-screen.

Truly, the villains thought, this was one challenge they failed to handle, and doom would soon be upon the rest of them.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

**A/N: Well, hate to leave it on a cliffhanger, but I believe we've seen enough epicness. Next chapter will be more of an in-between segment of what all happened while Tracker, FF2, and I were locked away in the basement with the clones, building up to this ending. THEN the story will continue.**

**Please review, and don't flame… it's bad enough watching what happened to Fanatic… :(**


	15. Part B: Authors VS Clones

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Trivia: I forgot to mention before that there was a time that FF2 and I wrote it to where our characters could become werewolves; in a separate story, we split from our wolf-forms permanently. Just saying this now in case you all wonder why we don't transform in the second season.

**And now for a in-between look at that last chapter.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything… no, really. Fanatic owns all these kick-ass villains, Disney owns a bunch of awesome characters, and I don't own anything and I'm the frickin' author- what the heck?!**

**Tracker: WG, just start the chapter before you go on another rant.**

**FF2: Yeah, we don't want to waste an entire page with the disclaimer.**

**Me: Alright, alright, just pointing out the obvious…**

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

_~During the last chapter…~_

"Oh yeah, about that… I LIED!" the Phony Fanatic shouted, slamming and sealing the door shut.

"…Fanatic?" WG questioned, then knocked on the door. *knock knock*. "Fan-aaaaatic?"

"Uh, WG, I don't think that was Fanatic… unless you've done something to miff him off again." Tracker told her.

WG sighed. "That's what I was afraid of… I CAN'T believe it, we fell for the ol' 'Evil Twin' gag! What is WRONG with us?!"

"Only our therapist knows for sure," FF2 quipped.

"Well, this isn't so bad. WG, you can just open us a portal out of here." Tracker said.

WG gave her a look. "Tracker, do you remember the LAST time I tried to use my portal-powers to get us out of a locked room?" she asked.

She cringed. "Oh, yeah… how we got kicked out of Switzerland."

"Well, there's just one thing we'll have to do- find a bunch of explosions and other lethal objects and blast that door open,"

"Good grief, have you've been hanging around Vinny again?" FF2 asked.

"Yes."

"Just wondering. Alright, this basement is huge so we'll have better luck if we separate and search. Tracker, you check near the lethal construction equipment, I'll go check by the nuclear missile section, and WG you can check near the pointy kitchen utensil containments."

"Right, we'll meet back here in ten minutes," Tracker agreed.

They all walked off… oblivious to the hundreds of red eyes watching them from the shadows.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

**Tracker's POV**

It was against my better instinct to agree to split up in the Club's basement- it was practically the size of Cuba, and easy to get lost in. Fortunately, since we started working here, we learned how to navigate through it and be careful of every kind of hazard… let alone mastered 'Marco Polo' while exploring.

I came across a ton of construction equipment, from wrecking-balls to fork-lifts to welders to giant buzz-saws, et cetera. They stored all this stuff down here so they could pull it out later for a cartoon that involves chasing a baby, kitten, or some cute thing through a construction site and the pursuer ending up getting hurt, though it's been ages since anyone has done those classic gags, and I was pretty sad to see that most of the equipment was beginning to collect dust.

"Lets see, should we use the bull-dozer, or the kegs of dynamite?" I asked myself.

" _How about the wrecking ball?"_ came the sound of multiple voices.

I looked over, just in time to see a wrecking ball swinging right at me! "WHOA!" I leapt into the air, on top of a metal beam of an unfinished building under construction, looking down to see someone was working the controls, then leapt down onto the ball as it was swinging back, breaking through the window of the machine. "Alright, who's the dead man who tried to knock me off?!"

I gasped, seeing what appeared to be Fanatic working the controls… but his eyes were red. There was another that looked just like him, but half his face was torn revealing a metallic skull, and a third whose arm-skin was torn off revealing a robotic arm and shoulder. _"He is,"_ They said simultaneously, pointing at each other. _"And you're going to die now."_

Their arms suddenly became weapons, pointing them at me. "Ah, crud," I leapt out when they took charge, blasting or slicing at me. "First we're dealing with zombies, now crazy robots. What's next, gremlins?"

I paused, hoping I didn't just spring a new idea for this story, then raced around to a cement mixer, starting it up and pouring concrete onto the three bots, watching as they hardened and became nothing more than mere statues. "Ha! Try to stop me, eh?! Well it'll take more than three dumb-bots to take out…" I paused, sensing danger, and looked behind me…

…seeing hundreds of robots like the last three, crouched on the unfinished building, their red eyes glaring down at me.

"…Tracker… seventy… eight."

" _Resistance is futile. Surrender now and your death shall be quick."_ All the robots said, using lines we've heard thousands of times in movies. Behind me, the first three bots broke out of their concrete prison.

"Oh, buggah."

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

**FF2's POV**

Searching for lethal weapons was practically like Christmas shopping for me, as I browsed through all the different kinds of bombs and missiles, half of which were used in the old Disney shorts they aired during WWII. It felt like I was in a store full of Animaniacs, Sam and Max, TMNT, and Doctor Who merchandise- so much I wanted to grab, yet very little time to gather it all.

"Lets see, I think I'll take the 300-missile launcher, a couple 50k bombs, a barrel of gun-powder with the detonator attached, and the arm-cannon." I said, grabbing said items.

" _Don't forget the exploding gift-box,"_ a robotic voice said, as I was handed a wrapped-up present with an ignited fuse.

"Oh, thanks I- YOW!" I chucked the box, watching as it exploded in the distance. "Alright, what's the big idea?!"

My eyes widened, seeing I was surrounded by several bots who struck an appearance to Fanatic, half of them without any skin.

I sighed and took out my weapons. "Should've known."

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

**WG's POV**

I think you should know the plot by now.

I'm looking for weapons. Some bots try to kill me via trying to drop a refrigerator on me, and I suddenly realize I'm surrounded by a bunch of Fanatic-like (or, as I've come to realize, Hater-like) robots either with full skin, missing skin, no skin… or, for some reason, nothing but skin (inching along only to end up getting stepped on).

"Ah man… we're using the whole 'Attack of the Clones' idea?" I grunted, taking out my [reassembled] machete, and began hacking through the numbers. "As if taking out evil hamster overlords took up ENOUGH of my time…"

*Crash! Shatter!*

I swung my machete, missing a bot as it ducked, and ended up shattering it on the wall. "OH COME ON! I _JUST_ GOT THIS FIXED!" I couldn't help but shout in all-caps, tossing away my weapon. "Guess I'll have to go all-natural,"

*ZAP!*

And thus, I began using my laser-vision, blasting all of the robots into busted circuits. "HA! That was easy…"

" _A-hem,"_

I turned… seeing another hundred bots standing behind me.

"Of course," I muttered.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

**Back to 3rd Person POV**

The Hater-Bots lunged at Tracker from the beams, raining down towards her. She reached over and grabbed a thick metal lead pipe. "I don't think so!" she shouted, then began hitting them as they leapt at her, busting their metallic skulls open or breaking their heads off, while she dodged and rolled to avoid getting tackled. Another bot climbed inside a steam-roller and drove towards her, inches from crushing her, until she turned and leapt up onto the concrete wheel, running up it and climbing onto the engine, breaking through the window and kicking the robot in the face hard enough to make sparks fly, then threw it down in front of the machine. She then whipped out her rifle and shot at some barrels of tar, spilling the substance on the robots and forcing them to be stuck in place as she ran them over.

She looked out the window, seeing several more bots were climbing up the machine towards her, and climbed through the broken window and onto the roof, leaping and grabbing a grappling hook, swinging away as the steam-roller crashed into the cement mixer, pouring wet cement everywhere, watching as several of the bots got stuck. Before she could celebrate, however, the wrecking ball was swung back at her, as two more bots got in control of the machine, and knocked her off, into the wet cement, her ankles and wrists getting caught as the concrete hardened.

What made it worse was how some robots driving a fork-lift was coming her way. She struggled to break free, but it was no use- she was going to be impaled road-kill! And it didn't help that a crowd of robots were surrounding her, weapons fired up and preparing to blast or stab her on the spot.

" _You cannot win, Tracker-Seventy-Eight,"_ the robots said in unison. _"You are trapped. There is no one to save you. Your end is now."_

"Save me? What am I, an old-fashioned Disney damsel in distress?" Tracker scoffed. "I'm stronger than that…" her eyes began to glow yellow just then. "MUCH stronger…"

The robots lunged, slicing at her and firing as the forklift sped forward…

*POW!*

Tracker, in her werewolf-form, broke free of the cement, leaping high into the air, causing half the robots to blast/slice each other while the fork-lift creamed them, ripping their metallic bodies to shreds, oil and circuits spilling everywhere as the skin was ripped off and the gears ripped out, until a blast hit the gas tank of the forklift…

*BOOOM!*

Tracker leapt off the top of the now-falling beams, over the flames and onto solid ground, however she felt the attack was long from over as she looked into the fire, seeing a few robots staggering out, half-burned, sparks flying from open gashes or sockets that once held limbs.

"I gotta find the others," She told herself, then sprinted off.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

WG stood on top of a large boulder (in the prop department of the basement) using her machine-gun to blast away the robots, a blast grazing her arm, deep enough to shoot a pain up to her shoulder and cause her to drop the weapon. "Agh! Dang it, first my machete, now my machine-gun," she groused, then looked down again, using her laser-vision. Sure, she could use it constantly, but what no one really figured about laser vision was… well, it really stung in the eyes, and blurred the vision, and the authoress could only use it for a long enough time until she temporarily went blind. She stopped after blasting a few dozen, covering her eyes and wincing from the sting.

" _Give it up, boy, you can't win this fight on your own,"_ the bots taunted her.

"I'm a GIRL!"

***KA-BOOM!***

There was an explosion not too far off… and suddenly FF2 landed beside her, while severed robotic limbs, heads, gears, circuits, and wires rained down from the mushroom cloud. "And she's not on her own," FF2 added.

WG arched an eyebrow. "How'd you defeat your armada so fast?" she asked.

FF2 grinned, holding up a stick of dynamite. "As it was mentioned in the last chapter, I'm quite handy with dynamite… especially when I'm able to shove it up a robot's-"

*BLAM!*

Another blast cut him off, and he ducked, looking down. "Sheesh, these things must multiply faster than rabbits,"

"Yeah, and if I use any more of my laser-vision, I'm going to become blinder than Calvin after seeing Rosalyn in a two-piece."

"You realize you've got more than just one power, right?"

WG paused. "Oh yeah…" she transformed into Stalker. "Man, why is it I can remember my abilities when hunting down flamers, but when we're in a life-or-death situation, it slips my- WHOA!"

A robot pulled her off the rock, and she fell to the swarm of robots below. "STALKER!" FF2 cried, watching as the robots enveloped her, and was suddenly grabbed from behind and several robots piled on top of him.

*BZZZZAAP!*

*KAPOW!*

An electronic shock shot through the robots, causing them to explode. The robots on the rock looked down, confused… not feeling FF2 shift and change into Silver, the werewolf throwing them off him, grabbing one and using him as a weapon, swinging him around and knocking the others off, then ripped off one of his laser-arms and blasted at any surviving clones. He leaped down off the rock, landing on the spot where the robots had exploded, where Stalker stood, her fists covered in an electronic charge. "And everyone thought a werewolf with electric-powers was a dumb idea," she scoffed.

"You can rub it in the critic's faces later, Stalker. We've still got company," Silver replied, nodding in the direction of another swarm of Hater-clones.

The robots shot at them, and the werewolves dodged, ducking behind several crates. "We need a plan- these things keep popping up all over the place!"

"We need to figure out where they came from… where could it be?"

"A-hem," Tracker said, sitting on a crate above them, then pointed over. "Perhaps THOSE can answer your question?"

The werewolves looked over, seeing thousands of crates open, all of them labeled 'Exp. Clone- Failure- Hater(s) 0001-5000.'

"Oh. That's convenient," Stalker put, bluntly.

There was another blast, and Tracker grabbed onto them. "Hang on to me," she whispered, and suddenly turned them all invisible.

"Didn't know we all had so many powers, did you?" Silver asked the reader, as they walked over to the empty crates, the clones still searching for them.

"Hey, there's some blue-prints here," Stalker whispered, pulling up a sheet of paper. "It reads here that all the bots will be shut down simultaneously if the master-chip is destroyed,"

"Where can we find the master-chip, then?" Tracker asked.

"According to these assembly instructions," Silver stated, holding up a pamphlet found inside the crate. "The master-chip must be placed in one robot, so that it may communicate and control the rest… so we just have to figure out which robot has the chip."

They looked over at the swarm of robots, who were knocking over crates and blasting props, searching for them.

"I'd figure the odds are 1 in 5000," Stalker muttered.

"How are we going to figure out which robot could be it?" Tracker asked.

"Easy, I can locate it with my Sonic Screwdriver, all we have to do is scan them- as long as you keep us invisible, they'll never suspect us," Silver replied.

" _Heat-seeking vision, activated,"_ The robots announced, and all the clones shifted their visions to heat-seeking…

…spotting the werewolves by the crates. "Or… we could go for plan B."

"What's Plan B?" Stalker asked.

"RUN!"

"I could've guessed that."

The werewolves took off, the army of clones racing after them. They all raced around the corner, passing by an ice-machine… not realizing the werewolves hiding inside it, peeking out once they all had passed by, and raced out, heading towards the exit. "Okay, new plan: We bust out of here, we set off a round of explosions in the basement to blow every bot sky-high, and we figure out where these things came from," Silver said.

"Yeah… I mean, who built these things?" Tracker asked.

"They came from Hater97," Stalker replied. "Fanatic once warned me about him- he was built to be like a duplicate for Fanatic, but something went wrong, he went through a lot of pain, became evil, and now he's after Fanatic… and created a whole army of clones to help get rid of him AND us!"

"How do you know all this?" Silver asked.

"He PM-ed me his ideas on Hater- I'd discuss them all, but I'm too focused on getting out of here alive to reveal the full-backstory!"

"Who's Hater79?" Tracker asked next.

"If my guess is correct, he's that phony who locked us in here with his killer copies!"

"You think he's the one with the master-chip?"

"I don't know- Hater created these clones, and probably is fighting Fanatic (who, I should point out, is even more insane than I am) even as we speak! He's a determined droid, but he's probably smart enough to install the chip somewhere else in case he was defeated,"

"And he probably thought that 5000 clones would be more challenging and the odds of us destroying the chip would be minimal?" Silver guessed.

"Bingo- problem is, none of the robots give orders, they all act out on their own, yet in unison. There must be someone working behind the scenes. But who? WHO?!"

"Not so loud, Stalker! Those crazy clones will…" Tracker hissed.

*Stampede sound*

The clones surrounded them all just then. "…hear you."

" _Your procrastination from death is pointless. Prepare to be eliminated,"_ The clones said, charging their weapons and taking aim.

"Stalker… please tell me there's a weakness these Hater-bots have that Fanatic told you about, that may have slipped your mind," Silver gulped.

"I don't know. The only other thing I know is that Hater hates everything Fanatic loves and loves everything Fanatic hates," Stalker replied.

Tracker's mind raced furiously with the new information, then got an idea. "Hey, look! It's that script for that Justin Bieber TV series we were sent down here to destroy!" she shouted, pointing in a random direction.

" _Where?"_ All the Hater-bots asked, turning their heads in that direction.

The werewolves then sprinted, leaping and running/stomping on the clones' heads. "Gang way/coming through/move it or lose it," they said as they ran.

One of the clones looked at the other. _"I thought robots like us were supposed to have an advanced intelligence not to fall for that,"_ it said.

" _Oh, shut up, we have orders to destroy those authors!"_ the other replied, and all the robots raced after the werewolves, who raced up the stairs, trying to break open the door.

"Budge, darn you! BUDGE!" Silver shouted, slamming his shoulder into the door.

"Stalker, we have no choice- you're going to have to turn back into WG and open a portal, NOW!" Tracker said frantically, as she watched the clones come forward.

"Alright, alright, I'm on it!" Stalker said, then shifted into WG. "Portal powers, don't fail me now…"

Concentrating hard, WG tried to focus on opening a portal for them to escape through, yet the robots were already five feet away and closing. "Wherever Girl, hurry!"

"I'm TRYING!"

" _Prepare to die,"_ The clones said, advancing.

"WG!" Tracker and Silver both cried.

WG opened a portal…

But it wasn't to a way out…

Instead, she opened it to a live volcano, which spilled lava out of the portal and toward the clones, flooding the basement and causing all the clones to sink in the lava, combusting and exploding as they sank lower. Bad news was, it was melting half the basement too! "Wherever Girl, close the portal!" Silver cried.

WG cut off her concentration, then looked over, seeing a crate that read: 'Sorcerer's Apprentice Act 3', stacked high above some melting crates. "Open that crate!" she cried.

Silver ran and leaped from one crate to another, avoiding the grasps of still-melting clones as they reached out for him, until he reached the crate and, using his sonic screwdriver, busted the lock and opened it.

Now, for those of you who don't know or may not remember, 'The Sorcerer's Apprentice' was a classic Disney sketch from Fantasia, and Act 3 happened to be the scene where Mickey has brought to life too many mops and they begin to flood the basement, losing control.

So, when Silver opened the crate, a blast of water shot out like a water-fall, waves upon waves washing over the lava and- when hot lava comes into contact with cold water- it forms hardened rock. Thereby, the destroyed clones were buried beneath solid magma, and only a few props were melted.

Silver returned to Tracker and WG, all of them taking deep breaths. "Wow… I never slaughtered so much since our zombie-attack," the authoress said.

"Yeah, though we didn't exactly get out of it unscathed, this time." Tracker said, pointing out the scrapes, scratches, and bruises they had gained while fighting the robots.

"Worst yet… we still can't get out!" Silver grunted, pushing and pulling the door. "Hater sealed us in, good!"

Tracker sighed, sitting down. "It's no use… we're trapped down here, until someone finds us,"

"Yeah… And I had invited the cast of _Turbo Teen_ and _Sam and Max_ to come visit tonight, too." WG added.

" **You what?!"** Tracker and Silver shouted, and raced towards the door-

*CRASH!*

…breaking through it. "Wow- pent-up psychotic fan-enthusiasm can break through anything," WG commented, looking through the hole, seeing Hater went as far as sealing a giant diamond to it- which now had a giant hole in the middle.

Tracker and Silver stumbled a bit- a bit dazed at crashing through such a thick barricade- and reverted back to their human forms. "Lets go find Fanatic… then get some autographs," FF2 slurred.

"You guys sure you don't want to sit down for a bit and let me handle it?"

"Hey, we can handle it, we're fine." Tracker scoffed, rubbing her head.

"Are you sure?"

Tracker gave her a look. "For the last time, Sailor Androm3da, we're fine!"

WG blinked. "Okay then…"

There was suddenly a loud *CRASH* from the stage, and they looked over, seeing that the cat-walk had come crashing down… and Fanatic was suddenly at the mercy of Hater. "C'mon… we've got a robot to hack to pieces," FF2 sneered, and they stormed on stage.

After Tracker shot off Hater's arm-weapon and WG chewed him out, Hater then turned his attention in getting rid of the three authors before him, angering Fanatic into having one last brawl with him, jamming him into the power-box and short-circuiting him… yet at the last moment, the robot had stabbed him in the side, much to the despair of the others.

"What… what are we going to do?" Tracker sobbed, as FF2 carried Fanatic's body towards the doors.

"I… don't know." FF2 replied. "We have to get him to a doctor,"

"No doctors can help him," came a voice, and they looked up, seeing Optimus Prime standing there. "There is only one place he must be taken to, in order to heal,"

The authors looked at each other, then back at the Transformer. "Take us there" WG said, pleadingly.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

They didn't know that Tempus and Hater79, who's energon had been saved and stored in a spare body with all his memories of the event downloaded into it, had been watching them. "Are you sure he shall die?" Tempus asked, more in a questioning tone rather than an anxious one.

"I did a number on him and weakened him… but I believe it'll take more to beat him," Hater admitted. "Same goes for those friends of his- 5000 clones, and they still defeated them." he grinned. "Then again… those were only the prototypes."

"Yes… and as long as I have the master-chip, their masses will be undefeatable," From within the shadows, his eyes gave Hater a dark glance. "As well as you… as long as you avoid failure- or should I remind you of the first time you screwed up?"

Hater sneered, lightly grasping his chest, where his heart would be (if he had one). "I will not fail this time,"

"For your sake, you'd better not. Do not think you are irreplaceable, Hater79,"

With that, the lights went out, and Hater79 stood there in one spotlight, glaring into the darkness before turning away and disappearing into the shadows.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Fanatic, meanwhile, was rushed to the ER… namely at the Base he had taken Minnie to in that episode where WG was the host. "Why did we have to bring him here?" Tracker asked.

"Because, this is where we always bring him in order to be restored back to health," Optimus explained. "Cryogenic Regeneration can work wonders,"

They looked, seeing Fanatic was placed in a chamber- one like the chamber used in _Beast Wars_ to restore robots, yet this one was built for humans.

"Will he be okay, afterwards?" WG asked, concerned.

"Oh yeah, Fanatic has gone through WAY worse things," Brain Wave spoke up. "Like the time his skull was reduced to nothing but powder,"

"Or the time his arm was ripped off and had to be reattached?" Head Case added. "And how about when Tempus ran a strand of energy through his heart- and he still survived!"

"Who's Tempus?" Tracker asked.

"What, Fanatic didn't tell you about him? He's practically his number-one enemy… besides Hater,"

"They've put Fanatic through a number of injuries, some fatal, some minor, yet he's survived many of them." Bumblebee added. "Your friend is going to be alright once he is restored."

FF2 looked into the machine. "Soooo… when will he be able to wake up?" he asked.

"It's hard to say, the process takes days, weeks, months, sometimes years to finish," Brainwave replied. "But, when it comes to Fanatic, it may not take that long. We'll see,"

Tracker's phone rang just then. "Hello?" she asked, answering. "…Yeah, we're still at the base. Ah, don't worry about what Pete has to say about the damage, Mickey, we'll handle it. …Yeah, they say he's going to be fine, but he'll be absent from work for a while. …No, we don't mind working his shifts. …I'll let her know. …Thanks," she hung up, turning to the others. "Mickey wants us to work after-hours to make sure no one tries to break into the club while it's closed,"

"I'll call Colin and and Androm3da and see if they'd like to fill in," FF2 said, taking out his phone, turning to WG, who looked at Fanatic in his chamber. He sighed, putting an arm around her. "C'mon, WG… it's been a long night. Lets go home,"

WG nodded. "I'll be right there," she said. Tracker and FF2 began walking out, while she stepped closer to the chamber, resting her hand on it. "I promise, when you come back, I'll stick to your side. …No one tries to kill my friends and lives to tell it,"

With that, she walked out, leaving Fanatic in his chamber, in a suspended animation as, slowly and carefully, his injuries were tended to.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

**A/N: And no cliff-hanger this time. The next few chapters will be absent of Fanatic, but don't worry, we'll keep checking up on him so you won't miss him.**

**Please review. No flames.**


	16. Kid Friendly (NOT!)

**Alright, peeps, here's a new chapter, and we'll be getting back to the humor after a dramatic experience (just so the story doesn't lose focus).**

**Also, starring in this chapter once more will be Sailor Androm3da and Supah KND Operation Colin.**

**Disclaimer: I WISH I owned SOMETHING in this story!**

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

_~Inside the Transformer's Base location we saw in the last chapter~_

WG stood in front of the chamber, Brain Wave and Head Case next to her. It had been a week since Hater's attack, and her friend was still in bad condition, though luckily his heart-rate was at a stable pace. "How's he doing?" she asked.

"Well, he had to get his tonsils removed, and we had to replace his kidney, and he's starting to grow a mustache, and due to a horrible malfunction he's now female." Head Case replied, looking at some statistics.

"WHAT?!"

Brain Wave smacked Head Case upside the head. "Dumb-bot! That's not Fanatic's chart!" he snapped.

Head Case checked again. "OH, sorry! …I was looking at the chart for Lady Gaga from five years ago," he said with a chuckle.

Bumblebee walked up just then. "Wherever Girl, I've been asked to give you a message. Tracker78 is going to France with her family, and Fangface The Second is going to meet with the Ninja Turtles to see if they would like to attend the club." he said.

WG nodded. Even though she wished her friends would stick around, she knew they needed a break from the grief, and didn't want to keep them around during her moping. "Alright, I guess I'll just call in our other recruits," she sighed.

It was going to be hard working without Fanatic.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

A couple hours later at the club, WG awaited the arrival of the back-up authors, Sailor Androm3da and Colin.

A large Tree-house rocket hovered overhead, inside being the two authors mentioned above. Colin crashed it by the curb, then handed Max the keys. "Here you go- be careful with it, I just had it tuned up," he said.

"Hey, WG, how's Fanatic doing?" Sailor Androm3da asked.

"He's getting better…" WG sighed. "Now we just have to wait for the plot to show up."

Suddenly some dude wearing a T-shirt that read 'Plot' on it walked up with a script. "Hey, am I late?" he asked.

"Nope. Mickey's office is that way," Colin said, pointing over.

"'K, thanks." The plot headed towards Mickey's office.

"Now what?" Sailor Androm3da asked.

"Give it five minutes," WG replied.

_~Five Minutes Later…~_

Mickey ran out, looking frantic… like always since this story began. "WG, we've got a BIG problem!" he cried out.

"We always have a big problem, that's the idea for every single chapter… otherwise, this story would be like reality, have no point, and bore everyone out of their minds." WG replied.

"What's the 'big problem' this time?" Sailor Androm3da asked.

"Well, ever since we've been allowing other cartoons in the club, the Censor Monkeys have been watching to make sure all kinds of characters interact decently- as in, not disturbing or harming others," Mickey explained.

"I think you broke that rule already," Colin said.

"Exactly! Ever since the whole 'Gaston' incident, they've been cracking down hard! And the whole 'Hater' incident only made it WORSE! They've decided, to assure that EVERYTHING and EVERYONE will be safe from any more mayhem, they're going to sent in some representatives from… from educational kid-friendly shows, TONIGHT!"

"I thought we were going to cut down on the all-caps," Sailor Androm3da quipped.

"Wait… Tonight?! But… this was the night where we have Videogame night- with the cast of the _Kingdom Hearts_ series as special guests!" WG said, stunned. "As well as Light from _Final Fantasy_ , Ash from _The Evil Dead_ , Sam and Max from… the _Sam and Max_ videogames, and Kite from . _Hack_! …And their games are full of violence, strong language, dark elements, and other things kids can't handle until after 3rd grade!"

"…not to mention I invited over Numbah One, Two, Three, Four, and Five of the Kids Next Door, and the Censor Monkeys don't take well to their show," Colin added, cringing.

"…and I invited the cast of Sailor Moon too…" Sailor Androm3da whimpered.

"Oh, GREAT guys! You invited characters from a show all about kids fighting adults, and an anime where 14-year-old girls wear mini-skirts that barely go past their thighs!" WG snapped. "Why don't we just invite the cast of Family Guy and South Park next?!"

"Can we?" Colin asked.

"NO!" Everyone shouted, making him fly back.

"Listen, guys, you have to make sure everything goes smoothly! The Censor Monkeys will be watching every move- one slip up and they're shutting down the club!" Mickey told them.

"Just tell us what we need to do." WG replied with a shrug.

"Well, we're having _little kid_ characters in the club- Little Bill, Little Bear, Max and Ruby, Franklin, Arthur, and Jake and the Neverland Pirates- so we have to make sure no one does anything above a K-rating: No swearing, no violence, no scary images, no 'adult-rated' content, and no stealing! I've already told all the regular guests about it and they oblige… but I don't know how the videogame characters will do, since it's pretty much a whole different universe with them. …Also, keep an eye out for the Warner Brothers and Sister- I heard they got loose from their water-tower again, and chances are they'll ruin everything!"

"Oh goody." Sailor Androm3da sneered.

"Wow- Too bad Fanatic isn't here, he's going to miss all the fun!" Colin exclaimed.

WG's eyes flooded, and she burst into tears. "WAAAAAAH-HAAAAAAAA!" she wailed as fountains of water shot out of her eyes, drenching them all.

"And… absolutely NO bringing up Fanatic while WG is in an emotional state!" Mickey snapped.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Unknown to our protagonists, Pete happened to be eavesdropping. (Obvious proof this guy is single, if he can't find anything else to do on the weekends).

"HEY! I RESENT THAT!" Pete shouted at the paragraph above, then grumbled and looked back at the club. "So, Mickey doesn't want any trouble with the little kiddies visiting, huh?"

"Uh, yeah dude." Plot said, suddenly standing beside him, handing him the script. "That's basically the point of the story, you don't need to repeat it."

"Oh. Well… I guess it's time I-"

"Yeah, we know- 'show them how 'kid-friendly' the club can, or in this case CAN'T, be.' …Dude, you do this in every episode. You hear about some 'major league' event and come up with some ploy to sabotage it, and it's only a matter of time before it blows up in your face."

Pete gave him a glare. "Don't you have somewhere to be?!"

"Don't you have a life?"

"Beat it!"

The plot shrugged then walked off. "Only a matter of time."

Pete shook his head, then looked back at the club. "Tonight, this time, the House of Mouse is shutting down for good!"

"That's what you always say!" the plot called from down the street.

"SHUT UP!" Pete then stormed off to put his plan into action.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Sailor Androm3da and Colin stood outside the club, while WG did a perimeter check. Within minutes, their guests arrived: Roxas, Sora, Axel, Kairi, Riku, Namine, Xemnas, Larxene, Xigbar and Demyx (from Kingdom Hearts in case none of you knew) came first. "Hey, guys. Uh, we need to do a weapons-check. We're having younger kids arriving, and can't have anything dangerous happen," Sailor Androm3da said.

"Key-blades in here, please." Colin said, holding up a box.

"Why should we listen? Kids need a little scarring once in a while, it builds character." Larxene sneered.

"Oh, GEEZ! You sound like my DAD!" Calvin shouted, passing by.

"Guys, Mickey said we'll have to oblige if we want to get inside," Kairi said, warningly.

"The girl's right… we can save our fighting for Kingdom Hearts III," Xemnas said, smirking evilly.

They handed over their weapons and entered the club. "This better not ruin the party-mood," Demyx scoffed.

Next up came Lightening from Final Fantasy. "Hey, Light, no violence or weapons allowed in the club," Colin said.

"Sheesh, I thought this place was supposed to be fun," he said, but obliged.

Next came the Sailor Scouts. "Hey, guys… the rules have been adjusted tonight, so… ah…" Sailor Androm3da said, then held up several pairs of pants. "Trying to keep it 'kid-friendly'."

The girls groaned, but put on the pants, then entered the club. "I thought Americans enjoyed our style," Sailor Moon said.

"No… just the boys." Sailor Venus replied.

Next came Ash… with his chain-saw arm! "Sorry, dude, got to keep on a regular hand," Colin said.

"*censored*, and I planned on challenging Captain Hook to a hand-to-hand duel," Ash scoffed.

Kite arrived next. "Uh… what weapons do you have?" Sailor Androm3da asked.

Kite sighed heavily. "This is why I wish my game were more popular," he muttered.

Sam and Max (2) entered next and were given the same rules. "No weapons, violence, swearing, or sexual themes? I thought this was a club!" Max (2) scoffed.

And finally, the Kids Next Door. "Darn adults and their 'kid-safety' rules…" Numbah 4 muttered, as they handed over their weapons.

"Better keep a good eye on him," Colin whispered to Numbah 5, who nodded.

After the videogame characters entered, the Magic School Bus soared down, and the doors opened, and out stepped Little Bill, Franklin, Max (3), Ruby, Little Bear, Jake, Cubby, Izzy, Arthur, and DW (oh geez, this is going to be a long night!)

"Hey, kids, welcome to the club!" Sailor Androm3da said. "Donald will escort you to your table,"

"Are we going to be eating in a private section like the celebrities do?" DW asked as the group walked with Donald. "And how come we couldn't take a limo? I could people who went to clubs got to ride in limos! Are we going to get fancy drinking glasses too?"

"Oh brother…!" Donald muttered, sticking cotton in his ears.

"DW, mom said to mind your manners, remember?" Arthur told her. "Otherwise, no trip to Six Flags!"

DW pouted.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

As the kids were seated, WG looked around the dining area, glad to see everything was in-line. She passed by the table where the Videogame characters sat, all of them chatting with the cast from _Wreck-It Ralph._ "Hey, you think we could get a cameo on your next game?" Vanellope was asking Sora.

"Didn't I see you two in a poker-game once?" Ralph asked Sam.

"So, you fight cybugs, huh? How do you do against zombies?" Ash asked Calhoun.

She looked over at the Buzz Lightyear (of Star Command) table, where the Sailor Scouts were exchanging stories with Buzz, Mira Nova, Booster, and XR; saw that the KND were doing well interacting with Gosalyn, who was going on about how cool their show was; and the little-kids were doing well playing with the Dalmatian puppies.

"Looks like everything is going well so far," WG said to herself.

"Make sure it stays that way," One of the Censor Monkeys said from their table as she passed by.

"Be careful what kind of influences they are around," another said. "There tend to be quite a bit of negative role-models,"

"Yes, well, there's also positive role-models to make sure they aren't led astray," WG replied, crossing her arms.

"Hmph, that's what everyone thought with Jiminy Cricket taking care of Pinocchio," the third censor monkey huffed.

"Hey, don't bash Jiminy Cricket! …You don't want to set a bad example for the kids, do you, in insulting others?"

"It was not insulting, it was criticism, as in sharing one's opinions, which children may be free to do." The first Censor monkey replied.

"Aren't you supposed to be checking the perimeter?" The second censor monkey asked.

"Hmph, no wonder the place is falling under bad-shape… remember what happened to that younger security guard?" the third asked.

WG bit her lip, then quickly walked off, tears coming to her eyes.

Calvin and Hobbes noticed from their table. "Geez, those apes are real jerks! Saying that right in front of WG…" Hobbes scoffed.

"I hope someone puts those primates in their place," Calvin muttered, then held up his fork with had a stopper on it. "Especially since their rules are pushing the limit!"

"Are you saying that just so you can bring a flame-thrower back into the club?"

"Hey, that was ONE TIME… and Sher Khan wasn't in therapy THAT long."

Hobbes only shook his head.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Pete snuck in through the back of the club, snickering as he headed towards the dining area. He then put on a pair of Mickey Mouse ears and walked over. "Ha ha, hi guys! Everything going hunky-dory?" he asked in a high-pitched voice.

"Sure, Mick- uh, did you gain weight?" Sam asked, arching an eyebrow.

"Oh, no. I uh… always look like this! The camera just takes off a few pounds,"

"A few pounds? Heh, it must be a pretty high-tech camera to make you go from looking like a whale to a shrimp," Max (2) quipped. There was a groan from a table next to theirs. "No offense, Monstro!"

"Say, I was wondering if you'd all like to say 'hi' to those kids over there- I heard they're big fans of you all!"

Ash looked over, arching an eyebrow. "Aren't they a little young to play games like ours?" he questioned, suspiciously.

"Er, well it's more like they're fans of the characters- as in, they've heard so much about you and would love to meet you!"

Light arched an eyebrow. "How did they hear about us?" he asked, also suspicious.

"Uh, internet. Just go say hi- tell them a few good stories, show them some of your best moves, just a few things they'd like."

"But I thought we were supposed to keep things 'kid friendly'," Kite pointed out.

"Oh, don't mind that! We're Disney- we always include something a bit mature. Take Jessica Rabbit, for instance."

"I'd like to take her for a drive instead," Sam quipped.

"I guess we could go introduce ourselves." Sora said with a shrug.

"Great! Well… gotta go!" With that, Pete took off.

"Huh… I know Mickey is a pain in our games and all, but I didn't think he'd be pushy enough to tell us how to socialize," Xigbar scoffed.

"Well, lets at least go over and say 'hi'," Kairi said with a shrug as she, Sora, Roxas, Light, Ash, Sam, Max (2) and Kite walked over. "Hi, kids, how is it going?"

"Pretty good. Who are you guys?" Arthur asked.

"(Having heard of us, huh?)" Light whispered to Ash. "We're some characters from the Videogame universe. I'm Light, this is Ash,"

"What's up?" Ash asked, giving a small wave.

"I'm Kairi, and these are my friends Sora and Roxas," Kairi added.

"Sam and Max- Freelance Police," Sam replied next, showing his badge.

"And I'm Kite," Kite finished.

"I'm Ruby, and this is my little brother- his name is Max, too." Ruby said.

"Holy crud, Sam! I think I found my long-lost children!" Max (2) exclaimed.

"Don't be ridiculous, Max- you don't even like women, remember?" Sam reminded him.

"I could have adopted them and forgot…"

"What happened to your arm?" DW asked Ash.

"Eh, it's a long story- a bit too scary for younger kids," Ash replied. "Lets just say, if your friends summon evil spirits and get themselves possessed, it would be a good idea to keep a chainsaw close,"

The kids gasped a bit. "I-It's okay, kids. Ash was just joking," Light said quickly. Despite what the so-called 'Mickey' said, he was going to make sure his comrades watched themselves around the kids.

"What's with the bracelet on your wrist?" Little Bear asked Kite.

"Oh, it gives me my powers in my game. In it, I'm a character in a videogame- like a game within a game- who has to destroy an evil virus, Skeith, who's putting players into a coma," Kite replied.

"Cool! Can I try it on?" Jake asked.

"Sorry, but anyone who touches my bracelet will get zapped."

While the Videogame characters talked with the kids, the Censor Monkeys looked, giving disapproving glances.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Outside, Colin and Sailor Androm3da sat on the sidewalk, playing cards. "Aren't you guys supposed to be keeping guard?" Max (Goof) asked them.

"Yeah, but after an hour, it got a little boring. I thought it was going to be exciting!" Colin replied. "Here we are, our favorite cartoons are mingling in the club, and we're stuck out here, where absolutely nothing is going on! Zip! Nada! No evil robots, no psychos, no knock-off nut-jobs… just boring boring BORING!"

As he ranted, three shadows snuck by on their tippy-toes.

"If I wanted to get paid by standing around doing nothing, I'd go work as a greeter at Wal-Mart- if I was dumb enough to take the job and get harassed."

"Hold it, Colin- I think a subplot just snuck by us," Sailor Androm3da said, clapping his hand over Colin's mouth.

The Plot walked up, with a kid wearing a T-shirt reading 'Subplot'. "No, he's right here." The Plot said, then shook his head. "Boy, the security around this place is running dense,"

"That was my idea!" The Subplot squeaked, and they walked along.

The two guest-authors blinked, then shook their heads. "The jokes we have to put up with…" Max (Goof) sighed.

WG walked out just then, her head hanging low. "Hey, guys. You can go check around the perimeter now. I'll take over watch out here," She said, glumly.

"Is something wrong?" Sailor Androm3da asked.

"I-I just need a little air. Go on in,"

"Are you sure-" Colin began.

"I SAID GO IN!" WG shouted loud enough to blow them back, fire in her eyes.

"Gah! Yes sir! Right away sir!" They then ran in.

Max (Goof) only stood there, as silence fell upon them, only the sound of the occasional car driving by breaking it. _Why is it she's always creepier when she's quiet?_ he asked himself.

“Max, I can hear your thoughts,” WG muttered.

“Augh!” With that, the valet ran inside.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Inside the club, Pete- still wearing Mickey Mouse ears- walked over to the Sailor Scouts. "Oh, girls, I decided to drop our American dress-code for tonight so you can all feel more at home. Why don't you show those young girls over there your uniforms? They'll love them!" he said.

"Okay, Mickey! …And wow, you look a lot smaller on TV!" Sailor Moon replied, dumbly. She and the girls took off the pants, showing their mini-skirts, changed into their uniforms, and went over.

Next, Pete went over to the KND. "Hey, kids, I hear those youngsters over there are looking to join your alliance against adult tyranny. Perhaps you could share a few missions and give them some experience," he whispered.

"Alright Mickey… but, um, have you've gained weight… and height?" Numbah One questioned.

"Mostly weight," Numbah Five quipped.

"Er, just been eating too much cheese, that's all." Pete replied. "Go on over and introduce yourselves,"

"I don't know… they seem a little young," Numbah Two pointed out.

"OOH! BUNNIES! Lets go over!" Numbah Three squealed with delight.

"COOL! Check out those kids' key-blades!" Numbah Four exclaimed, referring to Sora and Roxas as they were showing the kids how their key-blades worked. The KND ran on over.

Pete chuckled, then ducked behind a curtain. "It's all downhill from here," he said.

Unbeknownst to anyone, three silhouettes were up on the catwalk, looking down and smirking.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Colin and Sailor Androm3da had reached the dining area, when the Censor Monkeys approached them. "Excuse me, but are you two security guards around here?" one of them asked.

"Yeah, is there a problem?" Sailor Androm3da asked.

"Yes." They pointed over…

Little Bill was listening to one of Ash's stories of how he defeated zombies. "… and then the trees started attacking me, trying to impale me in the-" he was saying, until Light clapped a hand over his mouth.

"That's enough, Ash! You're making the kid go from black to albino!" Light snapped.

"…And that, kids, is how we took out the president," Sam said to Max (3) and Ruby. "Now, who wants to go on a joyride and hunt down some deranged mutated brains?"

Max (3) raised his hand, but Ruby forcefully pulled it down.

Jake, Cubby, and Izzy were messing with Sora, Roxas, and Kairi's keyblades. "Pretty good, maybe you guys can join us in our next game," Sora said to them.

"Why wait? I'd like to see their efforts now," Larxene said as she and Demyx walked over-

*POW!*

"WHOA!" Jake said, jumping back when Cubby accidentally shot Demyx back, having him crash into Axel… who, in rage, set Demyx on fire.

"Just let me wear your bracelet! I'll give it right back!" DW was demanding to Kite.

"What part of ' _painful and deadly shocks'_ do you NOT understand?" Kite snapped at her.

Sailor Moon was showing the girls her uniform too. "See? The shorter my skirt is, the easier it is to move around. If it were any longer, I couldn't move my legs as much," she was explaining.

"And so, with your help, we will bring an end to eating vegetables, bedtime curfews, bath-times, and all adult tyranny," Numbah One was telling Arthur.

"I love you, Teddy Bear!" Numbah Three was cooing, squeezing the breath out of Little Bear.

"*gack!* That's, 'Little Bear'," he corrected her.

Colin and Sailor Androm3da exchanged worried glances. "How the heck did they end up altogether?! We kept them separated- and who gave everyone back their weapons?!" Androm3da cried out.

"I believe that is YOUR problem to solve. Get them away from those kids immediately, or you can say goodbye to the club," One of the Censor Monkeys replied.

Quickly as they could, Colin and Sailor Androm3da ran over and told the Videogame characters, Sailor Scouts, and KND they had to return to their tables before their seats were taken, and they all left. "So… you kids okay?" Colin asked them.

"I'm going to be having nightmares for weeks!" Little Bill cried.

"I didn't mean to have that guy get set on fire, honest!" Cubby was sobbing, while Jake and Izzy comforted him.

"I WANT MY OWN BRACELET!" DW was demanding, while Arthur had his ears plugged.

"I think Max and I need to go home," Ruby said, holding her little brother close.

"Yeah, this place isn't really as fun as we thought it would be," Little Bear added.

"Um… here, why don't you kids order some dessert, on the house, and we'll be right back!" Colin said quickly, then grabbed Sailor Androm3da and they ran outside. "WHEREVER GIRL! WE'VE GOT A PROBLEM!"

"Someone let the Videogame characters, Sailor Scouts, and KND get to the little kids, AND they somehow got all their confiscated weapons back!" Sailor Androm3da said. "We have to DO something before-" he paused, giving her an awkward look. "Er, WG? You okay?"

WG… was suddenly black-and-white, looking emo."What's the point? Those Censor Monkeys have it out for us all, anyway- they'll find some reason to shut down the club," she sighed.

"WG's gone bye-bye, guys," Max (Goof) told them. "I don't know what happened, but something caused WG to slip into a funk tonight,"

"Why do I get the feeling it was those dumb Censor Monkeys? I wish there was something we could do to get them off our backs!" Colin sneered.

"(ahem) If you don't mind… WE could help," came a voice, and they looked over…

Seeing Yakko, Wakko, and Dot!

"Oh no…!" Max (Goof) groaned, face-palming.

"Sorry, guys, but Mickey says you can't go in the club," Sailor Androm3da said.

"Really? I think we can, it was no trouble sneaking in." Wakko quipped.

"Trust me, guys, we have ways of sneaking a few things past censors," Yakko said, smirking. "Tell Mickey that if he lets us in the club, we'll make sure those apes don't give you any more problems and let the club run as it is- I mean, putting a censorship on a club would be like putting a flea-collar on a naked mole-rat."

"Huh?!" Rufus squeaked, passing by.

"No offense, little guy." Dot said.

"C'mon, WG… You don't want Fanatic to come back and find out you let the club go down the toilet, do you?" Wakko told her.

"Not to mention… you're acting like Bella Swan." Yakko told her.

WG's head shot up, flames burned in her eyes, her color returning, and she faced the club, raising her machete. "WHAT DID YOU SAY, WARNER?!" she bellowed. "I'll show you- Point me in the right direction, guys, we'll give those primates what-for!" She then stormed off.

"Now THAT'S the WG we know!" Colin exclaimed.

"You do realize she may kill you for that 'Bella Swan' comment later, right?" Sailor Androm3da said to Yakko.

"Hey, I had to say SOMETHING to ignite her urge to maim," Yakko said with a shrug, and they all ran in.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

The Censor Monkeys stood backstage with Mickey, explaining their issues and reasons as to why they were going to shut the club down. "Your club is filled with many violations- violence, ill-manners, vulgar language… and what's this I hear about Clarabelle talking about slash?" The first Monkey brought up.

"And those security guards you've hired only seem to be attracting more trouble than they are solving it," the second added. "And I'm still hurt about that… _ruthless_ statement one of them made about us!"

"Fellas, please, hear me out! I told EVERYONE in the club to keep it kid-friendly!" Mickey tried to reason. "Even the villains are behaving! I don't see how the Videogame characters wouldn't understand, especially since I've worked with them!"

"I'm sorry, Mickey, but we've thought it over and-" The first monkey began.

"HEY GUYS, COME QUICK! Someone's running with scissors!" Colin shouted.

The Monkeys gasped. "Running with scissors?! That's the most dangerous code-violation of all!" The third cried, and they ran out.

Mickey followed, and WG stepped up to him. "Hey, Mickey… the head of the Disney company wants a word with you," she said, holding up a phone while grinning… which, actually, didn't really make the famous mouse feel any better.

Mickey took the phone. "Hello? …Yes. …Really? …I see. Well, if that's how you feel… Thank you." he said before hanging up. "Well… I wasn't expecting that."

"And the doctors didn't expect me to be a girl at birth. Now c'mon! We've got some Censors to break!" With that, she took off.

Mickey blinked, then turned to Pluto. "Okay, I knew she was a girl… I didn't know she was _born_ one."

The Censor Monkeys, meanwhile, ran out into the lobby where Dot stood. "Where's the culprit committing inexcusable behavior?" The first one asked.

"Maybe he's in here," Dot said, holding up her little box… she opened it, and The Director's giant head popped out.

"HELLO NICE MONKEYS!" The Director exclaimed.

The Censor Monkeys screeched in fright, leaping up onto the ceiling. "Young lady, that was not nice!" The second one snapped.

"Neither is your haircut, but I'm not pointing it out," Yakko said, appearing next to them.

"GAH!" the Censor Monkeys fell back to the ground, making a hole in it. "That's it! We're getting the kids out of this place!"

They stormed into the dining area… where to their horror, Wakko was making his trademark funny-face, which the kids found to be hilarious, then took a huge bite out of the table! "Stop! Get away from him, kids! He's not… age-appropriate!" The third cried.

"But he's funny," Izzy said.

"Here, have some cake," Wakko said, handing the censor monkeys a slice of cake, with a stick of dynamite in it!

*KA-BOOM!*

The cake blew up in their faces, and the kids burst out laughing. "That is not funny! Explosives happen to be very dangerous in real-life, kids!" The first Censor monkey snapped.

"Yeah… but this isn't real-life," Yakko spoke up, then turned to the audience. "Unless you ate something funny,"

"We will not stand for this! This club is getting shut down due to this kind of behavior!"

Dot walked up… then began working her cuteness. "But Mr. Monkey-Men, we're only trying to have fun," she said, sweetly while fluttering her eyelashes. "Pweese don't be mad at us,"

"No… stop that! Stop being so… cute! I-I don't know how it affects the censorship code but… we'll come up with something! Just- stop!"

"Stop this, stop that. What's your deal, guys? Everyone here has a few subliminal messages- this IS Disney, after all." Yakko said.

"But… the violence! The language…!"

"Shall be handled in an appropriate way," Sailor Androm3da spoke up. "That's our job as security authors- we only handle issues when such case calls for it. If someone brings in weapons, that's alright as long as they're not trying to kill anybody; language shall be censored around kids, of course, though no one here ever spoke any cuss words around minors."

"But what about these kids?! We told you all to keep it kid-friendly! No violence! No filthy language! No scary stories about zombies!"

"Yeah? Well if you didn't want the kids exposed to that kind of stuff, why'd you send them here?" Yakko asked, now dressed like a Perry Mason knock-off. "And how come you sent them here without their parents or guardians? You knew this was a club, you knew there'd be villains… and yet you sent these poor, innocent kids here anyway!"

"But… but.. they're representatives! To make sure the place is appropriate for children! And those OTHER characters broke the rule!"

"Yeah, but Mickey said it was okay," Demyx spoke up, and Axel smacked him upside the head to get him to shut up.

"What?!"

"Sure… he's right over there!" Max (2) said, pointing over at a bulging curtain. Max (3) walked over and pulled it back, showing a snickering Pete wearing Mickey Mouse ears

Light walked over and swiped the fake-ears off his head. "I knew your poor charade wouldn't work," he said.

"GASP! Mickey is really Pete in disguise?!" Sailor Moon gasped… and the rest of the Sailor Scouts slapped their foreheads.

"Uh… gotcha?" Pete said, shrugging innocently.

"SECURITY!" Light shouted.

Colin, Sailor Androm3da, and WG walked up, smirking… and holding machine guns, knives, spiked ball-and-chains, rifles, daggers, spears, chainsaws, bombs, and a rabid hamster. "You called?" WG asked.

"EEEEEEEEEEEEK!" Pete shrieked like a girl, then ran through the wall.

The first Censor Monkey sputtered in disbelief. "THAT IS A HORRIBLE INFLUENCE TO SET ON CHILDREN! CHASING AFTER GROWN MEN WITH AN ARSENAL OF WEAPONRY AND-" he shouted.

"And we don't mind. They chased the bad guy away," Little Bill spoke up.

"Yeah, we like having them on OUR side," Jake agreed.

"Listen, guys, some of the characters around here may have given us a few shocks… but that doesn't mean they're bad people. Plus, it's not right to judge others the way you do," Izzy added. "It's good that you want them to behave themselves, but you have to understand some boundaries too."

"Plus, Yakko has a point- if you wanted to see if something was appropriate for us, you should have sent an adult instead." Ruby agreed. "It is a parent or guardian's job to check to see what their kids are watching, doing, or hanging out with."

"It's also important to talk to them about sorts of things when they're old enough to understand, such as bullies, drugs, alcohol, and other things they should be prepared for, just so they'll know how to handle it." Arthur added.

"And if they're too young for certain things, keep them away from them- set up a block on your television and computer so they don't have access to naughty things." Cubby added.

"And if something is going on that scares them or makes them uncomfortable, they can talk to their parents about it so they can explain," Franklin agreed, then turned to the Videogame characters. "No offense, guys, you're all pretty cool… but I think we should wait until we're ready to handle the content you're used to."

"A wise choice, kid." Ash agreed.

"Other than that, this place is really nice. There's a lot of other kids here, too, that we can hang out with," Little Bear said. "But… we'll have to make sure it's alright with our parents, first."

"Please don't shut down the club. You may think there's some bad role models here… but there's good role models to help keep someone on the right track," Colin added.

"Oh, very well! But we'll be keeping an eye on you!" The first Censor Monkey sneered.

"Actually… you won't." WG said. "Mickey… tell them the news."

Mickey walked up. "I had just spoken with the Head of the company… and they say they disapprove of your work ethic in hassling the House of Mouse- while there are OTHER shows being released on television that are full of bad influences!" he said, sternly.

"I'd list them, but then this chapter would never end," WG quipped, holding out a long, LONG list.

The Censor Monkeys' jaws dropped. "What?!" they all cried.

"Yep, so you're being relocated to another network," Mickey said.

"Which one?" The second Censor Monkey asked.

"The Dingo Channel,"

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" The Censor Monkeys asked.

For those of you who don't know, the Dingo Channel is a [fictional] network that appeared on iCarly, full of horrible shows and the only way they can make money is by stealing ideas from other shows (unless someone has found the frozen head of their old producer to blackmail them with).

The Censor Monkeys left the club, sobbing. "Aw, and we were just starting to have fun with them," Wakko said, grinning.

"But, one thing I don't understand… how do you know the head of the Disney company?" Colin asked WG, as it was her idea to contact him.

"Oh, simple. In THIS universe, the head of the company… is FF2." WG said, smirking.

"So, wait, if FF2 is the head of the company… and you're his girlfriend…" Donald spoke up, then instantly paled.

"Yep. …Watch your move, duck."

Donald promptly fainted.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

After the club closed for the night, WG went back to the base to visit Fanatic… seeing Head Case and Brain Wave were standing by the monitor, the atmosphere very serious.

Getting closer, it was no wonder- the chamber's monitor was going berserk. "Whoa! Something's going on with Fanatic!" Head Case cried out.

The authoress rushed over. "What?! What is it?!"

"It looks like… a build-up of some sort from deep within him!" Brain Wave gasped, analyzing it. "It must be something powerful!"

"Watch out! He's gonna blow!" Arcee shouted.

*TTTHHHHPPPPPPPTHHHH!*

A giant burst of flatulence shot out inside the chamber. It was so loud, and so long, Fred Flinstone clocked out from work! The sound echoed throughout the base, the planet, the universe… and stunk to High Heaven. …No, really. The angel of my dead hamster dropped down, holding its nose.

Everyone else was on the ground.

"Yeah, it was a build-up alright- a gas build-up," Head Case commented. "You were right about one-thing, though- it was powerful,"

"My eyes are stinging!" Brain Wave cried out.

"But… we're robots. Severe stenches shouldn't bother us," Arcee pointed out.

"When it comes to Fanatic, he knows how to break the laws of physics," WG said, a nose-clip on her nose. "At least this is a sign he's getting better- and the humor has returned."

Despite the stench in the air, she was happy, knowing her friend was going to be alright.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

**A/N: Don't say it- the ending stunk. (had to use a pun, sorry!)**

**Please review. No flames though! …especially with all the gas in the air.**


	17. Night of the Undead Robot

**As of yet we still own nothing T_T At least WE DON'T but good old Fanny owns...well you'll see.**

**Also Halloween is coming up, and you all know what that means right kids :D!? A day which involves celebrating scary stuffs, dressing in costumes outside of Comic Con, and candy that'll rot your teeth so Wal-Mart can get a few extra bucks and the dentists gets a raise cause of all off your cavities ^^**

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

_The House of Mouse. 8:45 PM_

Horace Horsecollar was in the projection booth of the House of Mouse, as he always was every night the club was open, he rarely left even when REALLY disastrous stuff was going down. Except for that one time with Hater fighting Fanatic… but it _was_ Fanatic.

Horace adjusted the projector, and aimed it towards the screen and turned it on ...revealing that the lense was upside down.

Horace grumbled and set it up right. Right then Mickey walked in carrying several rolls of film.

"Evening, Horace." The Mouse said setting down the film canisters. "I've brought ya tonight's toons."

"Thanks Mickey." Horace said as he picked them up. "I was just about to get 'em myself." He set them next to projection booth.

"Well, I figured that, while I was next to the film vault, I would bring them up, but it was hard though with a robot stuck to the door." Mickey said referring to when WG melted the Hater drones in the basement.

"Well thanks Mickey!." Horace exclaimed, right as they heard some circuits sizzling.

"What's that?" Mickey asked.

There was a sudden flash, and than the lights went out.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Down in the Prop Room, WG and FF2 were in their werewolf forms, Silver and Stalker, and were trying to pull a few Hater Drones out of the solid rock, while Colin and Sailor Adrom3a were chipping away at another one that had its head stuck.

"We need to get werewolf forms." Colin lamented. "It would make this so much easier."

"It's not ALL fun and games with these forms." Stalker said with a growl. "YOU haven't been chased by villagers with pitchforks!"

"I'll never understand WHERE they got them." Silver said shaking his head.

"The Nostalgia Critic most likely." Stalker said again, right as the lights went out!

"AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!"

"Stalker, stop screaming!" Colin called.

"That wasn't me!" The she-wolf sneered. "Do you honestly think that I would squeal like a girl- AH WHO'S HAIRY APPENDAGE IS TOUCHING ME!?" She squealed and jumped up into a steel beam.

Silver blinked. "This would be a bad time to say that _I_ was the one that screamed and grabbed her arm, wouldn't it?" he said while cringing.

"Dude you SO just lost your man card." Colin said with a snicker, right as Silver grabbed the boy's throat.

"Wanna say that to my face!?"

"WAIT I'M SAILOR ANDROM3DA!" Sailor Androm3da pleaded.

'Whoop my bad." Silver dropped him.

Colin chuckled and tried to sneak away.. and face planted on the floor cause he tripped over some rock. "OW!"

Stalker jumped down from the building and growled, as she turned back into WG. "Anybody got a flashlight? It's darker than the inside of a politician’s mind." she asked.

"Relax, it's probably just a power surge or something." Silver said as he walked over to the main power box, tripping over several crates, a costume rack, and a giant bowling ball. He turned on a flashlight and looked.

The power box was still on, he grumbled and flicked a few swatches…and then he hit it with a sledge hammer, Waffle Iron, Tire Iron, Frying Pan, Pizza Box and Miley Cyrus's head.

The Box fizzled and cracked to life…and then shot out a HUGE burst of electricity blasting the Authors back as it traveled throughout the wires.

Silver stumbled back and collapsed into a smoldering heap, that groaned. "Okay, maybe, that WASN'T a good idea." He said.

"No kidding.." WG said as she heaved her Boyfriend, to his feet. "C'mon we'll tell Mickey that we got the lights back on." She led her boyfriend away, the other two authors following.

They went up to the club entrance where everyone else was waiting.

"Did you guys fix the power surge?" Daisy asked.

"No Tinker Bell did it, OF COURSE WE DID!" Sailor snapped until Colin socked him. "Ow, by the way what as that thing even caused by?"

"Wild Parsnips, someone watching The Lord of the Rings AND STAR WARS movies, the Microwave blew up, Donald watching Sailor Moon till his nose bleed?" Sailor piped in.

"HEY I NEVER DID THAT!" The duck shouted.

"That's not what the spy camera said." Sailor said under his breath.

Horace held up a burnt up cord, "The coffee machine in the kitchen kind of short circuited, luckily we have more." he informed.

"Coffee: the chocolate bean of all evil." Colin said darkly.

Max walked over and examined Silver. "I take it HE did most of the fixing, considering how he looks like our dad after trying to cook burgers." he quipped.

"Why Maxy…I look worse than that!" Goofy pointed out.

"Well either way, we just got him back in the story, and now he's Kentucky fried werewolf!" WG said. "I'll get him home quick and be back in time for my shift."

And with that she helped her boyfriend out the door.

Minnie looked at Mickey. "Well another crisis averted- on the plus side, it was quick." She commented. "Oh and by the way Mickey, I managed to get your robotic prop arm finished." She said proudly as she held out a human like arm.

"Thanks Minnie." Mickey said as he held it. "It's perfect for tonight's show!"

"Well now that everything is going fine there is only one thing to do." Sailor said happily.

"Make funny faces and eat snow cones until we pass out?" Colin asked.

"YES!" Sailor cried out. And they both ran off to the nearest Snow cone machine…in other words right back into the prop room.

CRASH!

"OW! I TRIPPED OVER A DRONE!" Colin shouted.

Meanwhile what no one knew was when Silver had been flicking wires he had turned on the one for the power box nearest the stage… that had been turned off for a very good reason. The blast of electricity surged through it, and ended up striking the power box.

By the stage power box a number of things had been placed there after the Hater Incident, the table that Hater and blasted with dip, parts of the wall that both had crashed into, the carpet that had spilled energon stains, and the collapsed catwalk, the area had been sealed off with yellow tape, pillows and duck tape.

A sign was posted near saying **KEEP OUT OF AREA ( _Calvin, this means you)_**.

The blast of electricity struck the box, and something attached to it jolted upward and fell off. The fallen object lay on the floor, until there was a sharp movement and the sound of metal clashing was heard.

The object stood up, and a single red light shone into the darkness, energon dripped from several parts, including the mouth.

It opened its mouth and let out a roar, and stumbled and then shuffled off screen… doing a quick Party Rock anthem shuffle before it lumbered off.

0o0o0oo0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Later that night the club was in full swing, and Mickey had addressed the audience pretending to be the Mickinator, and the Security Team were all standing outside…WG, Colin and Sailor.

"So think anything interesting is going to happen tonight?" Colin asked.

"Doubtful, unless that power surge, and blast of electricity caused a robot to reactivate that wants to kill a bunch of people and stuff, and all of that junk that could make a good horror chapter." WG said. "But that would NEVER happen."

"I know, last I checked Disney didn't own any robots." Sailor said.

"Are you stupid or something?' Colin asked.

"No but my mother did say that I was dropped down a flight of stairs by an evil hamster overlord."

WG rolled her eyes. "This is gonna be a long night." She said, normally she would make it through it ever since FF2 had started coming, and even when he wasn't on the job Fanatic would at least have kept her entertained (so long as he didn't do or say/write anything that would cause her to rip his lungs out again- oh yeah, she STILL remembers the 'dress' incident AND Baby Shelby chapter BEFORE it was edited…)

Sailor looked up at the paragraph. "Could you let it go? Your therapist said not to write about grudges." he asked WG.

"Yeah, that's why _Missing In Fiction 3_ sucked," Colin remarked.

"You're only saying that because I wouldn't let you in," WG sneered.

"…I just wanted to kick an evil wizard's butt like everyone else, okay?!"

WG rolled her eyes. "I'll write it to where you kill Voldemort later, now let it go."

Colin crossed his arms. "At least FANATIC let me have a role in THIS story,"

Sailor swatted him upside the head. "Watch what you say, numbskull!" he hissed.

"What?! What I say?!" Colin looked over, seeing WG was wincing. "Oh… oh yeah. Sorry."

She wiped her eyes, thinking about the younger author's condition at the moment, but it had improved, and Brain Wave said that he should be recovered soon, though she still felt responsible for the younger author…despite that he could hold his own in fight.

She turned around and walked in ready to check perimeter when she saw something out of the corner of her eye.

She turned, suddenly to see a small pile of energon that had dripped onto the carpet. She groaned. "Oh for the love of, one of the Transformers is leaking again… I swear if that one cat-bot of Soundwave's peed there-"

She stormed off ready to find the Transformer responsible…..as a figure lumbered out of the shadows and stared after her, and a low growl was heard from it, as it lumbered towards another hallway.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Outside the club, Colin and Sailor were talking to Max.

"Hey Max, why weren't you in Epic Mickey?" Colin asked.

"What do you mean?" Max asked, surprised.

"Well Disney no longer uses you, so why weren't you in the game; it would have been GREAT! ...well not that great put you could've been a fish outta water amongst those old toons!" Sailor said. "I mean a modern forgotten toon with older toons?"

"Well," Max said. "My dad wasn't on board with the already dark tone of the game and FF2 said that he was willing to put me in because he knew LOADS of people that still remembered and loved me, but the company said 'no'."

"People love Horace x Clarabelle, and I remember them and they were in the game." Sailor pointed out.

"Maybe cause their person-changed." A voice said, but it sounded garbled.

"Yes exactly." Max said. Then he blinked. "Who said that?"

"Why do I feel like I'm going to do a double take and see something horrifying?" Colin asked, and all three turned around.

Before any of them could react, the figure roared, and lashed out, attacking them, Max yelped but was slammed into the ground, whilst Colin and Sailor…Fled for their lives. "MOMMY! OMINOUS FIGURES ARE ATTACKING AGAIN!" Sailor cried.

Colin snorted. "Man, am I the only one who still has my man-card?" he asked… then stubbed his toe on a brick. "YEOW! MOMMYYYY!"

The Figure stared off after them, and growled, energon dripping from its jaws as it looked down at Max, who cringed in fear. "What do you want?" Max pleaded.

The figure bent down low and growled, a blade extending from its arm, and it held it up to Max's neck. "Re-venge!" It said and pulled back the blade with a slice!

Max's head thudded to the Sidewalk. "Huh and I thought this only happened to Dad." He lamented and sighed. "Good thing I'm a cartoon and can't die, otherwise there would actually be tension in this scene just now."

Max's Body then grabbed it's head and placed it back on.. upside down.

"There we go." Max said happily.. right as it was punched off again, and it flew into a nearby dumpster. "Oh great!"

The Figure snarled, and then walked back into the club in a slow pursuit…REALLY slow….go refill your sodas folks, this'll take a while.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0oo0o

Inside the Club WG was walking amongst the toons, and trying to keep her heart rate down.

"Must not go into fan mode, MUST NO GO INTO FAN MODE!" She said, clenching her fists as she walked past The Avenger's table… you'd think after working here for almost a year, she would be over this, right?

She looked up at the stage, and saw Mickey doing his act with the Robotic arm, and his paint brush from Epic Mickey which he was using to paint the arm into positions reminiscent of famous artworks, currently it looked like the Mona Lisa.

She chuckled dryly knowing that Fanatic would be downright either laughing, or saying something cynical, the thoughts bringing a tear to her eye.

Suddenly Colin and Sailor Burst through the door, Jafar's table, The Tar Monster's stomach, the Cotton Candy globs face, and the blottings from Epic Mickey, and falling into the Fanatic shaped hole… again.

Yeah they never got that fixed!

The both ran up to WG. "WG, trouble, big, bad, roaring, growling, drooling, slicing, dicing, killed Max, SLICED OFF HIS HEAD AND ROLLED ON THE CARPET!" Colin was stammering

WG whipped the spit off her face. "Okay I understood Drooling and something about killing… have the Jim fan-girls returned?"

"EVEN WORSE!" Both of them shouted, blowing her hair back.

WG blinked. "So the Bronies are here?"

Up on stage Mickey rolled his eyes as he watched the Authors bicker and he continued his act. "For my next trick, I shall," He began as he felt an arm land on his shoulder. He looked and saw the Robotic arm.

"I shall take this arm and, paint it, into a person!" He said happily, as he pulled on the arm.. and a head came down next to him.

"What the?" Mickey inquired and looked, he gaped and his jaw went slack.

Staring at him was Hater's head still torn up from his battle with Fanatic… only it looked more like a robotic zombie (hey, that's a good mash-up, someone should make a movie of that!).

Mickey stepped back as Hater reared top his full height, and let out a blood curdling roar. Sher Khan, Hobbes, and Rajah all lost their stripes, Calvin's hair actually FLATTENED, the Lonesome ghosts all jumped out of their clothing and ran, Chernabog hid under the table, and Simba's mane fell off. "Yikes. I didn't know your mother was coming," Hades said to Maleficent, only to get zapped. "…*cough* Lady, you need to get a sense of humor!"

Hater growled at Mickey and lashed out, trying to grab the Mouse's neck, but Mickey ducked, and then stood up and fired a blast of paint at Hater.

The paint hit Hater, who glared at him, his face reforming, and he growled and then grabbed the brush and threw the brush aside and then grabbed the Robotic arm.

Suddenly he heard a shout, and looked…just in time to see WG's face hit his face. Hater's head snapped around, but he twisted it back, and growled at WG.

"I have been waiting to do that!" She said happily as Colin and Sailor joined her.

Hater growled, and than roared once more, and charged forward, using his body to run Sailor over, and smack Colin and WG with his arm. But WG grabbed onto his arm and bit into it.

Cracking all of her teeth and shattering them.

"Okay Ow, bad idea, bad idea!" She moaned, right as Hater sucker punched her. Or tried to but she grabbed his fist and threw him across the stage.

Hater's body smashed down, and skidded across the floor, and it rose once again, growling and dripping energon from his teeth.

I can't tell if he's a zombie or a dog at this point… or maybe a _High School of the Dead_ fanboy.

Hater's lone optic narrowed, the element of surprise had been lost now Mickey, who had remembered how to use thinner *finally* and the Authors were ready for his next attack. So Hater did the one thing that he never did before, turn and shuffle away.

It was odd, he seemed to be running but he wasn't moving very fast. It reminded WG of the failed Hater's that were just skin.

Mickey turned to them. "Well are you guys going to…?" he asked, then made a 'throat-slit' motion with his finger.

"No," Colin said. "Otherwise the plot would die."

The all stared off as Hater walked away, growling and snarling, then he fell through the trap door and fell down screaming.

The four ran over and looked down, they heard a metallic crash sound at the bottom. They all looked at each other.

"Do you think he survived that?" Mickey asked concerned.

"Well seeing as how Fanatic put him through the bad place and back and SENT him there and then he came back…I'm going to say that the fall he just took was like me stepping in gum." Sailor said…right as he stepped in some gum. "GGGGGAH! NO WHY, WHY, WHY?! I'M DYING, THE BRIGHT LIGHT IT'S CALLING OUT TO ME!"

SMACK!

"Thanks I needed that." Sailor said after Colin smacked him.

"First things first, we need to find what caused that copy to come back to life in the first place!" WG ordered. Then she clenched one of her fists. "Then we can destroy it and beat the living energon out of that guy!"

Mickey looked over to where everything that was stored that Hater and Fanatic damaged. "Come on guys this way we may find some clues here."

As WG and Mickey walked off Colin looked towards Sailor. "I don't get it, WG thought that Energon was a life source, now she knows it's a Transformers Fuel and blood?"

"For that matter… how do _we_ know?" Colin asked, suddenly terrified.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

_~Inside the Transformers Base~_

Several of Fanatic's OC's were gathered around Fanatic's tank.

A gold and Blue jet Transformer blinked. "Why is there a laptop floating next to Fanatics fingers?" He asked pointing out the device.

"I don't know, maybe um…" A Pink and White Helicopter Female Transformers said.. "um….."

Before she could continue Fanatic's phone, which had been laying on a lab table, began ringing. Road Hazard and another Transformer, Colored Red, White, Blue, Silver and Gold jumped up, this one turning into a Dodge Challenger "I'LL GET IT!" They both shouted, but than tackled the other.

Another Female Transformer groaned and picked up the phone. "Hello this is Silvermoon here, how can I help you since everyone else here is to incompetent to answer the phone?' She said in a French accent.

"Yeah this is WG, from the House of Mouse. I'm one of Fanatics friends. Listen, I need to talk to Head Case and Brainwave." came WG's voice.

Silvermoon turned to the others. "Head Case, Brainwave, a young boy is on the phone for you!"

"Young boy?" Brainwave asked. "Must be WG."

"How can you tell?" Sky Rim asked.

"She calls around this time EVERYDAY, the Answering Machine blew up thanks to her!" Head Case said with a groan.

Brainwave took the phone. "Hello, WG?"

Back at the club WG and the others were looking, at the power box where Hater was supposed to be, but the body was missing and it was burnt.

"Um yeah….we've got a problem," WG said, and she explained what had just transpired (we're going to skip writing it all out because we're lazy like that). "…So has you can probably tell things are NOT going well for us at the moment." She finished.

"No Doubt," Headcase responded. "Listen WG, we cybertrionians have a life-force known as a spark which is essentially our heart, but Hater has none; he is an AI and therefore has a CPU."

"Okay, so?" WG asked.

"When Fanatic shoved Hater into the Power box it overloaded his CPU and Circuitry, thus shutting him down, so something must have happened to reactivate his CPU, and seeing as how his repair function hasn't activated, only a fraction of him is online."

"Okay so that means?"

"It means that his basic Programming has kicked in; he only knows to kill and destroy everything related to Fanatic."

"So how do we stop him?"

"You would have to fully destroy his body- not in pieces, melting down preferably, before his systems fully reactivate!"

"I see….thank you then."

"You're welcome!"

WG hung up on the OC and looked at the others. "Well Hater is not a zombie…sorta….."

"So now what, do we beat the oil out of him and call it a night?" Colin asked.

"Well no. From what I understood from what they said…. we need to melt Hater down." She said, looking over at Mickey. "Do you happen to have an anything that we can use that WON'T destroy the prop room and/ or half the club in the process?"

Mickey paused thinking. "Well down in the prop room there are a series of giant vats filled with Thinner and paint, the high amount of Cartoon world thinner, which melts toons, should destroy Hater."

"Wait, why doesn't WG just use her laser-vision?" Colin asked.

"Because, in order to melt anything solid that wasn't ice or rubber with my laser-vision, I'd have to stare for a full 20 minutes," WG explained. "If I were to do that, I would go blind, then it would be hard to type and this story would never be finished."

"Then Fanatic could finish it- once he recovers," Sailor said.

"How would he know she was blind though?" Colin asked.

"An email?"

"How could a BLIND person SEND an email!?"

"Oh yeah… well then… TO THE PROP ROOM!" Sailor shouted.

_*Batman 1960's thing but with WG, Colin and Sailors faces, and it slams into the screen, each bruising the authors faces*_

_"I can see why no one uses those transitions anymore…" Colin groaned as they stumbled down the stairs._

WG groaned as they walked through the prop room. "Who was controlling that thing anyway?' She said referring to the transition.

"I don't know but I wanna kill 'em!" Sailor said, and punched a random crate, and several costumes from Kim possible fell onto him, and he was now dressed as a cross between Drakken, Ron Stoppable, and Monkey-Fist. Colin snapped a picture.

Suddenly the all heard a metallic growling, followed by a crashing and they turned and looked.

There was Hater, holding an arm ripped off from another Hater drone which he then jammed into place where his own arm was, growling the whole time.

They heard a click, click sound and the newly placed arm changed into a chainsaw blade, it whirred slightly, but then it puttered…and then started up once more.

Hater charged forward roaring like a hamster overlord on speed, he swung down and gave buzzcuts to al three authors.

"Great, just what I need." WG said with a sneer.

"Hey it could be worse- remember when your sister cut your hair and your niece said you looked like Justin Bieber?" Sailor commented.

"Okay, it's not THAT bad."

Hater snapped back and roared once again, and the Authors vanished in a puff o smoke leaving dust figures of themselves…which Hater promptly chopped all three heads of the dust clouds off.

The Dust figures screamed, grabbed their heads and ran. Hater took off running after them.

The three Authors ran into a three way, and they looked around. "Should we split up?" Sailor asked.

"And let Hater pick us off one by one, ARE YOU INSANE!?" Colin shouted. "That's the biggest cliché in a horror type film EVER!"

They heard a roar and they all….ran in several different directions. "Who are we to ruin a good horror-cliché?" WG said with a shrug.

0o00o0o0o0o0o0o0o0oo0

Sailor tore around several corners, until he came across the Construction equipment place, several machines still damaged from Tracker's fight with the Hater drones. …wait where IS Tracker during all this?

(A scene is shown of Tracker in the hospital with a still burned Silver, reading a magazine).

Ah. Moving on…

"Hmm let's see which one is best suited for Robot Destruction?' he mused to himself. His eyes scanned several machines, looking them over.. and then he felt and heard someone breathing down his neck.

"Ya mind pal? I'm trying to kill a zombie robot here and I need to decide which is the deadliest!" He said.

"*Kzzcht* Bull-dozer, nice choice." came the zombie-robot's response.

"THANKS!" Sailor said and raced into the Bulldozers cab. "What?' He said, looking at the reader. "I've read the book of clichés just as many times WG has!"

He started the Bulldozer with a roar from its engine and he drove it forward, raising the blade up. "HERE COMES SAILOR!" He yelled as he bore down on Hater.

Hater stared at him, and then glared up as the Blade came down onto him. But he grabbed it and held it there, much to Sailor's surprise.

Sailor grunted, and then pushed down on the lever pressing the blade downward, but Hater kept a firm grip on it, grinding metal could be heard as Hater pushed the blade up, Sailor was unsure if it was Hater's arms or the Bulldozer blade that was making the noise.

Hater snarled and then pushed the blade higher extending his legs, while Sailor pushed down on the lever, the Bulldozer's engine began to spark, and then Sailor slammed down on the accelerator, and the Dozer roared forward, crashing into Hater's legs.

Hater let out a roar of shock, anguish and pain as he was driven into a large pile of crates, and the blade dropped down onto him.

Sailor then raised it up and smashed it down once more. He grinned as he pulled back. "BOOYAH!" he shouted.

_*Up in the club*_

Ron Stoppable blinked. "Why do I feel like someone is using my catchphrase?" he asked.

_*Back with Sailor.*_

Sailor then drove the Bulldozer into the pile.. and then it stopped. He groaned as he tried to get the dozer out from the pile, revving the engine as he did so.. suddenly the blade was torn off, and a claw, attached to a rope slammed into the Canopy.

"Mother." Was all that Sailor could say as Hater ripped off the glass, and threw the blade into the cab, tearing the top part off.

Sailor turned and looked at the robot. "You just never give up do you?" He asked cynically. '

Sailor, gripped the controls and surged the dozer forward, smashing it into Hater, who groaned and pressed his hands against the caterpillar tracks of the dozer. They ground up, and began to tear apart, the engine spluttered.. and then caught on fire, much to his shock.

"ABANDON BULLDOZER!" He shouted, and dove off, right as it exploded, he whipped around and looked as fire shot into the air.

Sailor then put on a pair of Sunglasses and smirked. "Looks like his circuits just got scrambled."

**_*Cue CSI Miami opening*_ **

But his relief was short lived as Hater leapt from the flames and tackled him. Before Sailor could respond, Hater lifted his arm up and it turned into a sickle.

All sailor could do, was scream.

*CHING*

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Colin looked up, hearing the scream. "And then there were two." He said sadly.

He looked around, standing atop a pile of crates and stuff, knowing that since he was the one the reader was seeing, he was the next to go.

"Horror cliché." He said.

He turned and looked, seeing a group of large vats. "SCORE!" he shouted. Jumping down into one of those studio trams and drove off towards them.

As he drove, he passed by the Construction equipment, he turned and saw… Sailor, pinned to a crate by a sickle JUST below his manhood and enough chains to hold down Fifty Elephants.

Sailor waved as Colin drove by, as Colin blinked.

"Well that killed the suspense."

As he drove he saw a figure standing off to the side with a thumb sticking out, he decided to ignore it.. until a feminine leg stepped out.

Colin slammed on the brakes and stopped.

"Hey~ good looking... what?"

*Click-Click*

"I'm an idiot."

He ducked as a rocket soared over his head, and he hit the gas Pedal…right as Hater grabbed onto the back, and tore the tram in half.

Colin sighed. "Great,…luckily I have ROCKET BOOTS!" He shouted as he activated them and soared off towards the vats.

As he flew he looked and saw…Hater had extended jet like wings from his back. "For a supposedly zombie killing machine he's efficient!" Colin commented.

Colin soared towards the vat, and saw a pipe leading out from it. He grabbed onto the handle and twisted it, and heard a gurgling, and he watched as Hater flew closer, and lower to the ground.

"Hey Hater want to be thinner!?" He shouted. "…oh man that was bad."

But to his surprise what came out was not thinner.. but a spray of paint, which smacked into Hater. Hater let out a roar, as Colin quickly closed it and looked. "Oh crap." He said as Hater's skin and clothing grew back in full, along with his missing optic and the damaged parts of him smoothed out.

Suddenly, Hater's head snapped up and he grinned. "Well now, THAT did the trick!" he exclaimed, now having his voice back.

"Oh no!"

"OH YES!" Hater's arm then turned into a gun, and blasted Colin into the vat, and then he hit with his internal flame thrower, sealing the author in the paint.

"And now that I have dropped the Zombie act…Time to pay WG a visit."

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

WG stood atop the Thinner vat, having opened it and scavenged a bunch of weapons from the fallen Hater drones. She had seen Colin heading for the Paint, with Hater following and she already guessed the outcome.

She blinked and turned, to see Hater, staring at her, a grin on his face. "Miss the full view?" He asked sarcastically.

"Like I missed it when the cops tried to make me get in a straight jacket.. the tenth time." she scoffed.

Hater blinked. "Okay then, anyway, prepare for extermination!" He shouted and he turned his right arm into a rocket launcher and he fired it.

WG dodged and returned fire with her laser-vision, Hater was struck in the arm, and his right shoulder was slightly burnt.

He growled and raced forward, his arm becoming a blade and he found himself crossing blades with WG's machete. He pulled back and struck again, but it was once again blocked, and she kicked him.

Hater stumbled but then fired his own laser, that WG ducked and rolled, and fired her laser-vision again, but Hater dodged as well and then tackled her. Hater proceeded to throw WG towards the thinner, but she stopped herself and then blocked Hater's arms with two drone arms that she had tapped to her arms which she was using as blades.

"Not bad." Hater said, put then WG punched him in the face, and promptly shot him in the face as well.

Hater jumped back as WG decked him again,. "Thanks, jerk." She spat. As Hater got up, WG slashed him with her right arm blade, followed by another kick.

Hater stumbled as his skin reformed, but WG struck again before he could react. She swung around, but Hater caught her fist and threw her over his shoulder and with a crash she hit the ground hard.

But, she got up and nailed him in the side of the head once more, and she tried to punch him again, but he once again caught the fist.. and she kneed him in the manhood… which she remembered was also made of metal, though it still left a dent… but it still hurt her foot.

Hater and WG squealed as she grabbed her foot and Hater fell to his knees.

"Well there goes all feeling down there." He said with a groan. Right was WG kicked him in the head again.

Hater's head twisted around, enough times to make someone dizzy and with a growl, he upper cut WG, and she went flying.

She crashed into the ceiling and fell back down on top of Hater, where she promptly rammed her blades into his arms, and then slashed him across the face with a machete.

Hater growled once again, as WG stabbed him in the right eye, and gouged out his optic once again.

Hater fell to his knees and glared at WG who smirked…right as Hater changed his arm into a whip and wrapped it around WG, flinging her across the vat.

With a *thud* she landed and looked up to see Hater boring down on her, his hands converted into drills, but she used her laser-vision once more and fired a shot into Hater's head, catching him off guard, he fell on his face but as he got up he found the gun in his face again.

"Why do I keep forgetting about her laser-vision?!" Hater griped.

"This is for what you did to Fanatic!" She shouted and fired, most of Hater's head was blown to pieces as his body fell into the thinner screaming the entire way.

WG looked over, and saw him sinking in, as he looked up at her, he raised his middle finger and flipped her off, holding it there until he finally sank in.

WG smiled happily, though confused as to how she managed to gain the upper hand.

"Seriously it took Fanatic an entire Chapter to damage him and I do it in less than a second!?" She asked, right as a ground bridge opened up and Sky Rim, Head Case and Brainwave walked out.

"That is because WG, he wasn't at full power yet, he had Hater's mind but he was basically at drone level of intelligence." Brain Wave explained.

WG blinked. "So his mind was like drone's then?"

"Exactly, it's the doppelganger protocol. We found that Tempus has it that if TWO fully functioning Haters are online at the same time, one will have his personality but it'll be a drone, the other will be unaffected, and it looks like the one that you just killed fit the bill."

"Okay then.. and why are you guys here?" She asked.

"Well we figured that we really ought to NOT wait until Fan wakes up to clean up the drones.. in case something like that happens again."

WG rolled her eyes, as Colin came up with Sailor, Colin noticeably covered in paint.

"Well is it over?' Sailor asked hopefully…as Colin walked toward the thinner not being able to see, but he was grabbed at the last second.

"Yep it's over." WG said happily. "It's all over.. for now at least."

"Good, now then let's get Colin to a shower and explain to the crowd what happened, otherwise it'll be like the time they ran out of Tacos, Burritos and Churros on Mexico night!" Sailor said as WG shudder.

"Don't remind me of that incident.. please!"

As they walked away the three Transformers began cleaning up the mess caused by Hater.

"Yak know for whatever reason, I'm beginning to like that girl." Brain Wave said.

"That was a girl?" Sky Rim asked with a grunt.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Later the three Authors were once again in front of the club having assured everyone that Hater was now gone for good.

FF2, now out of the hospital, walked over carrying Max's head his body having been searching for it everywhere.

"Here you go Max." FF2 said happily as he placed it back on.

"Thanks," Max said. "I thought I was going to be taken out with the trash…again."

WG snorted and looked across the street, and her eyes went wide.

Standing across from her was Hater.

Hater smirked as she looked at him, as a bus roared past, and he was gone.

WG stared at the stop... and then watched as the clone of the evil robot walked past it, covered in bruises and the bus's license plate imbedded into his forehead, cursing said bus under his breath before spontaneously combusting.

She sighed, and then looked at the reader. "What did you really expect a dramatic ending from this fan-fic?"

She paused and then smirked, knowing that all was right with the world as usual….well not all right but still.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Meanwhile in Tempus' secret lair- which I can't reveal otherwise I'd be shot like the last narrator was- Hater watched a security screen that showed the Zombie-Hater sinking in the vat of Thinner.

"Well, well, Fanatic, it looks like your little friend gained the upper-hand… for once." he scoffed, then turned around at a skeletal prototype that was in the process of being built. "But just wait, for she'll be meeting her match soon."

"Uh, not that soon, I'm afraid." said a drone that was working on the prototype. "We're still downloading a few personality traits, we're low on energon, and still trying to find a decent shoe-size."

"So when will it be finished?!"

"Uh… maybe not until Season Two,"

Hater growled, then shot a random drone, then turned back to the screen. "Fine. Until then, I shall deal with the authors… if they're still alive before then, and I'll make sure they won't be!"

"Yeah… that's what the last few OC Villains said."

"SHUT UP AND GET BACK TO WORK!"

The drone yelped then took off.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

**A/N: Well that was a suspenseful-ish episode, wasn't it? Will Fanatic return soon? Perhaps. What is Hater working on? Not telling. Will there be reviews? Most likely. Will there be flames? Only if someone has a death-wish.**


	18. The Revenge of Doom

**Fanatic owns his OC's**

**Disney owns almost everything**

**And whoever owns the Knock-offs…..they have no shame!**

0o00o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

It was your calm average night at the House of Mouse, and by that we mean the place had only suffered minor structural failure as a result of Goofy being asked by the Mad Hatter and March Hair to give them a waterfall of Tea…while doing the Cancan…on a beach ball, riding a unicycle, and painting a perfect replica of the Mona Lisa... With his nose hairs, while fighting off rabid hamster overlords.

"And that is why the _create your own meal and the way it is delivered_ idea is being taken OFF the Menu!" Mickey said to Goofy, who was scratched up to the point where you couldn't even tell he was Goofy anymore, while the now 5 staffed Security Team watched.

"You know I really thought Goofy was going to win that fight." Tracker said, shaking her head. "I just can't understand how they get the upper hand!"

"Probably when they popped the Beach ball and began beating him with the Unicycle!" FF2, his arm around WG, then called to Goofy, "Don't worry, Dad! We've got evil-hamster lord coverage on our insurance!"

"I don't even WANT to know where he got the skirt!" Colin said cringing.

"It may explain why Tiana left the club early!" WG commented.

FF2 and Tracker had returned following the Zombie Hater incident, considering that this chapter FOLLOWS that one it's kinda obvious, FF2 having convinced the Ninja Turtles to show up, and Tracker's visit to Paris was cut short due to, among other things, the Spanish inquisition….don't ask me. And they had kept Colin and Sailor around for extra support, because Fanatic was at this time missing.

Yep. Fanatic was missing.

When WG last checked his CR Chamber was empty, and some weapons that Fan had been trying to complete were also missing as well. It was obvious that he was better after all, but now NO ONE knew where the younger author had gotten off too, which concerned WG a bit, but not too much… after all the kid was more crazy then she was, even bragging how his sanity died the same day he was born. Spooky, ain't it?

"Well at least this crisis has been averted." Colin said. "Now If anyone needs me, I'm gonna go see if I can get the KND to allow me to test drive their new vehicles!" he said walking off screen.

"I'm going to show the scouts Sailor Moon USA" Sailor said, cringing. "That thing didn't even last a SINGLE EPISODE…" he held up a picture of the USA version of Sailor Moon. "For obvious reasons." He said pointing out that no one had begun drooling.

"Isn't this Normally how we END an Episode? Tracker pointed out as she, WG and FF2 walked back toward the entrance to the club.

"It's an attempt to make the plot different from the usual and luring us into a false sense of security until the main plot comes in." WG said, as they exited the club. "In fact he should be here annoy minute."

Just then Plot, (from the Kid Friendly, NOT episode), walked over to them, this time wearing a Tye Dye shirt. "Sup." He said happily. "Is the club's inside that way?" he asked, pointing indoors. The Three Authors nodded happily, while Plot walked in, and then Sub Plot ran in as well.

"This should be interesting." Tracker commented, right as a loud scream was heard.

"'It was a dark yet clear night, suddenly a scream rang out, a door slammed and… I was dragged into the club.'" WG said parodying that all too familiar intro, as she was dragged into the club by her comrades.

There they found several toons gathered around Belle and the Beast's table. They pushed their way through and found both Beast and Belle sitting there… but they were just sketches of themselves rough outlines and all…and not moving.

WG gasped. "Are they…?' She asked fearfully… then paused. "Wait, I don't get it. What ARE they?"

"We're not dead, if that's what you're thinking." The Beast growled. "Someone just stole our animation!"

"Did you guys see anything that could help?" came a voice, and up stepped Fred, from Scooby Doo (the 1969 version, thank you). "If it's a mystery, we can solve it." He motioned to Daphne, Velma, Shaggy and Scooby behind him.

WG blacked out and grabbed her chest. "TELL ME I'M DREAMING!" She shouted, making everyone jump, and began to jump up and down with excitement so fast that she was practically a blur.

"Easy girl." Tracker said, and then slapped WG and the blank look left her face, and she promptly hit Tracker in the face with a rubber chicken.

"Thanks, and NEVER do that again!"

FF2 began pushing the gang away. "Sorry guys but this is a job for us, as we are this places Security Team." he said.

"But we're mystery solvers!" Fred shouted despairingly. "WE CAN HELP!"

"Has he always been like this when a mystery comes up?" WG asked Daphne…while getting her autograph.

"Ever since Mystery Incorporated made us look like Demon fighters." Daphne said, suddenly noticing that WG's face going red mad as she wanted to punch Daphne for saying that show's name but she didn't at the same time.

Daphne gulped and reach off screen. "Here, punch this!" She said quickly.

"HEY, WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?" Moe demanded.. right as WG tore him from Daphne's grip and began beating the ever loving snot out of the bully.

"I'm loving this place more every minute!" Calvin said to Hobbes from their table, videotaping Moe's beating.

"So while WG beats up Moe, we'll interview Belle and Beast " Colin said, keeping a sharp eye on WG in case he decided to take her anger out on him.

They Four authors walked over to them.

"So tell me." FF2 said. "What did you see, what did you hear, what did you smell, breath, eat, and drink when your animation got stolen?"

Belle, cocked an eyebrow and sighing began.

"Well, me and Beast were eating our dinner when we both felt sharp pains in the back of our necks, we looked around, but saw nothing, and when someone pointed it out to us, we realized that our animation quality was gone!" she told him.

"So is that why you screamed?" Sailor asked.

"That wasn't me screaming."

Everyone then looked at the Beast, who was looking around, trying to avoid eye contact.

"I see…." Tracker said smirking, "Anything else?"

"Yeah, Ariel, Eric, King Triton, Melody, Pinocchio, Lady, Tramp, The Loony Tunes and the screen." Beast pointed out.

The authors blinked, and turned around, seeing that the named toons were indeed just pencil sketches, as well as the screen.

"Well this is …odd." Colin said.

"NO S**T!" The others screamed at him. Then they saw everyone staring at them

"Um…forget we said that." FF2 said, as WG walked over, with Moe tied into a pretzel, that she threw off screen.

"Anything yet?' She asked them.

"Well no, FF2 what do your notes say?" Sailor asked him.

FF2 looked at his closed notepad. "Umm…..I'd rather not…."

*YOINK*

WG looked at the notepad, and flipped through it. "Been practicing your DeviantArt sketches on the job again?" she asked, arching an eyebrow. FF2 shrugged, grinning innocently.

"So anyone else got any theories that DON'T make fan-art references?' Sailor asked, looking up at the screen. "Hey I wonder if the bolts, wires and stuff that held it together are still fitting onto that thing?"

Right as he said that, the screen tipped over and crashed into a bunch of broken lines on the stage. They all looked up to see…

…a chicken standing there, giving them an awkward look, then walking off.

Oh, and a man in a hood and a cloak staring down at them.

The figure stared at everyone in the club, blinking, and wheezing. Suddenly it began wheezing harder and began coughing, it bent over and began making sounds akin to a cat throwing up, and then raises it's hand to revel a walnut.

The figure threw it down the floor.. where it hit Daffy in the head, and then it sprinted away.

They blinked. "Well _he_ seems like a logical choice." WG stated.

The others stared at her with an "REALLY?" look on their faces.

"What?" WG asked.

"Does Fanatic always write you up to be this stupid, or are you just lacking self esteem again?" Tracker deadpanned.

"A little of both, why?"

"Lets just find out who that weirdo is!" With that, they all took off.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Meanwhile, while our authors were looking into the mysterious figure scenario, some familiar enemies reared their ugly heads and entered the club through the vents…

*CLANG!*

*BONK!*

*WHAM!*

*DOINK!*

*THUD!*

…Which, as Calvin proved in the first chapter, isn't exactly a stealthy way to enter.

"Finally, we're back inside!" came one voice.

"So, now what do we do?" came another.

"Simple, we get rid of those princesses and take their spots!" came yet another. "Now, here's the plan: we lure all the princesses' fan-boys into the club, have them chase them off, and take their seats! The security guards will have trouble trying to keep the fan-boys away, especially when we smear grease on them making them unable to grasp-"

"Hold it, girls, I think someone's already beaten us to it! Look!" came another voice, and the mysterious little figures- who the reader can easily recognize- looked out into the dining area…

Seeing that Cinderella, Mulan, Jasmine, and Snow White were just mere sketches of themselves! …with a chicken pecking at their food.

"Holy Snapple McApple! What happened to them?!" Zagi cried out.

"What the Shepard is going on here? Half the place looks like one of FF2's drawings!" Bianca commented, looking around the half-sketched room.

"I hope that's a compliment." came a voice, and the girls turned around, seeing FF2 standing there with the rest of the authors.

"GAH! THERE'S MORE OF THEM!" Hemi shrieked.

"We're doomed! Although…" Cindy said, inching close to Sailor Androm3da. "One of them IS pretty cute."

"CINDY!" The other Knock-Offs scolded.

"…eep." Androm3da gulped.

"Listen, you little prima-donnas, we have no time for your antics right now," WG said to them. "Someone's stealing all the animation out of the place, and we've gotta find a way to stop 'em and restore everything! If I were you- which I'm glad I'm not- I'd get out of here before you lose your color and abilities to move!"

"Ha! You can't scare us away THAT easily! …Perhaps until your little princesses can be restored, WE'LL take their places!" Bianca declared.

"Do I have to kick your bouncing-butts again?"

"Try it!"

*Splash!*

A spray of green substance shot across the room and doused Zagi just then. "Zagi! Are you alright?!" Hemi called.

"I think so…" Zagi stood up, but as she did the color melted off her and she became a stiff sketch.

"OMG! THEY GOT ZAGI!" Cindy screamed.

"YOU BUTTHEADS!" Hemi snapped at the Authors.

"Hey, it wasn't us!" Colin snapped.

"LOOK! THERE HE GOES!" Sailor shouted, pointing at the mysterious figure… who coughed up another walnut and threw it at his head. "Ow!"

"Tracker, WG, you stay here and handle the Knock-Offs, we'll go after that figure!" FF2 declared.

"Why can't we go after him?" WG demanded.

"For one thing, those Knock-Offs are girls… I think… and guys can't hit girls, but you and Tracker can. Plus, I don't want to risk having the one thing I love the most getting turned into a sketch,"

"But you left your wand collection at home," Colin said.

"I'm talking about WG!"

"Well, I don't want to risk losing you either!" WG said to him. "It's bad enough that Fanatic is gone… If I lost you, I don't know what I'd do- you give me a reason to live, and without you… well…"

FF2 held her close. "Don't worry… even if something does happen to me, I'll just come back. I told you, I'll always be around to protect the ones I love."

"Awwwww!" The Knock-Offs swooned.

Sailor Androm3da began to tear up. "Alright, lets go already before we end up with our own 'Disney-styled' tender moment!" he said, then blew his nose on a tissue with a loud *Honk!*.

The guys moved out, and Tracker and WG faced the Knock-Offs. "Alright… are you girls going to leave, or wait until another one of you gets turned into a doodle?" Tracker asked, cracking her knuckles.

"Knock-Offs never say die!" Bianca shouted.

"YAAAAH!" Cindy, Bianca, and Hemi shouted, running at Tracker and WG-

*CRASH! SMASH! BASH!*

…only to immediately get punted into the wall 0.5 seconds later.

"We can do this all night if we have to," WG said.

"Seriously, girls, you should be getting out of here! Do you not care about what happened to Zagi just now?!" Tracker pointed out.

"We're going to avenge Zagi and not give up until we've got our own personal table!" Cindy shouted, and they all lunged again…

*Bonk! Klonk! Donk!*

Only to get swatted back and land on their heads.

"Well, at least they've got heart," WG said with a shrug. "…tiny hearts, but still."

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

With the guys, they were on the trail of the mysterious figure. "What exactly IS this stuff, anyway?" Colin asked.

"DIP." FF2 answered.

"Ooh, anyone got some chips?" Sailor asked.

"No, D-I-P, DIP. The substance used in Who Framed Roger Rabbit to kill cartoons!"

"I thought that was just a bunch of boiling pea-soup used for special effects," Colin said.

"But, there's only one person who knows how to make DIP, and that's…" Sailor gasped.

"SURPRISE!" The mysterious figure shouted, jumping out in front of them, revealing himself to be Judge Doom!

AAAUGH!

*THUD!*

**_*Please Stand By*_ **

**_The authoress writing this part of the chapter suddenly had a horrifying nostalgic relapse and had a heart attack. Currently we are shooting 25000 volts of electricity to revive her and- oh, there we go._ **

**_*We now return to our story*_ **

"Holy crap, Judge Doom!" Colin shrieked.

"Here, have some DIP, boys!" Judge Doom shouted, then sprayed DIP at them through what appeared to be a high-tech super-soaker, and nearly got them had they not dodged, making the wall turn into a sketch instead.

Laughing maniacally, the deformed cartoon began bouncing around, his eyes bulging out as his arm stretched out, grabbing FF2 and swinging him across the room.

*Crash!*

The villain cackled. "Someone call a doctor for The Doctor!"

"Quick, try to get the gun!" Androm3da told Colin.

"EAT S.P.A.N.K.E.R, DOOM!" Colin shouted, taking out said KND weapon. Doom just sprayed it with DIP, and it reverted to a sketch, Colin dropping it before it could spread onto his hand. "…maybe I should use a more realistic weapon."

"No duh!"

Doom leaped over Colin and landed behind Androm3da. "Hey, Sailor! My name's Doom, what's yours?!" he laughed, then tried to spray Sailor, who dodged and grabbed Colin, pulling him out of the way. "S'matter, boys?! Chicken?!"

FF2 got up, and took out his wand, zapping Judge Doom. "I hope WG and Tracker are having more luck than we are!" he said, as he tried to keep Judge Doom at bay.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

*Doink, doink, doink, doink*

Tracker and WG were playing wall-tennis… with the Knock-Offs as the balls. "This is easy. Last time you girls had your A-Game on." WG commented.

"We *ow!* didn't *ow!* have *ouch!* any *oof!* time *ooh!* to *yow!* think *grunt* of *ah!* backup *oh!* plan! *OW!*" Hemi grunted as she was bounced off the wall repeatedly.

"Girls, maybe we should listen this time," Zagi told them. "It's kind of hard to change facial expressions, and that stuff really burns the skin,"

"How about this: we call a truce until that creep we're after is caught." Tracker asked as she and WG stopped smacking the Knock-Offs against the wall, having them fall into a dazed pile.

"Why should we listen to you?!" Bianca sneered.

Sub-plot walked up just then, holding up a script. "Because it says here on page 9 that you guys willingly agree to do so, before Zagi fades out of existence," he explained.

"WHAT?!" The Knock-Offs gasped.

"Oh, no WG… Look!" Tracker cried, pointing over at the sketchified guests… watching as one of the pencil-bird-things from Alice in Wonderland went from a pencil-sketch to a skeletal draft.

"Dear Lord! Everyone's turning into the first stage of a drawing tutorial!" WG gasped.

"Yeah, and you've only got one hour to beat that guy and find a solution before everyone fades into oblivion!" Subplot said, then walked off.

"Crap, what do we do NOW?!" Tracker asked.

WG pondered for a bit, then turned to the Knock-Offs. "Alright, girls. You come with me to stop the moron causing all this." she said, then took out a sheet of paper. "Tracker, here's a list of names and addresses. Find these people and bring them here fast!"

Tracker looked over the list. "Right!" With that, she shot off.

"C'mon, girls! Lets go show that creep what happens when you mess with a Knock-Off!" Hemi declared.

"Why doesn't he just read Episode 2, Rip-Off Princess Prima-Donnas?" Cindy asked.

Everyone rolled their eyes. "Cindy, why don't you just stay here and keep Zagi company while we go fight?" Bianca asked.

"Okay!"

"Lets go," WG said, and they took off.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Tracker ran to the Disney Studio, meanwhile, and knocked on a door. "Yes?" asked a man.

"Yeah, I'm Tracker, I work down at the House of Mouse… listen, we need a favor," she said, walking in and explaining the situation.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

With the guys, they were shooting at, zapping at, throwing objects at, and spraying hot water at Judge Doom, who only dodged them and shot DIP at them. "Man, nothing can kill this guy! You sure you don't want to just use _avara kedavra_ on him?!" Sailor asked FF2.

"I did it twelve times, and he kept dodging! I'm trying to use _accio_ to get that gun!" FF2 said, then used the spell and the gun finally flew out of Doom's grasp and into his own hands. "Got it!"

"Did you?" Doom asked, then pointed.

FF2 looked, seeing a fuse on the gun, noticing it was a dud. "Oh, snap."

*KA-BOOM!*

It exploded and DIP flew everywhere, splattering on them. "HELP! IT GOT ME! I'M MELTING! I'M MEELLLTTIIIIING!" Colin screamed… not realizing he was not melting. Actually, he wasn't even a sketch.

FF2 and Androm3da looked at each other… seeing they were just in their reality forms. "The DIP must've just erased our cartoon images!" Androm3da gasped.

"Really? I didn't notice," FF2 said sarcastically, then turned to DOOM. "Well, Judge Dupe, looks like your plan failed!"

"I wouldn't say that!" Judge Doom said, then let go of a rope he was holding, causing a piano to drop towards FF2, Colin, and Sailor!

However, a portal opened beneath them and they fell through, the portal shutting before the piano hit the floor, shattering into several pieces. A different portal opened behind Judge Doom and the three guys dropped down, weapons ready. "Want to try that again?" FF2 sneered.

Judge Doom turned around. "Nice disappearing trick… now here's mine!" he shouted, zipping away in a flash. He raced out the doors and down the street.

Down the street stood a figure, who picked up the white line and bent it to the side so that it led into a wall.

Judge Doom, being a toon, followed the ol' gag and smashed into the wall. "…Darn toon instincts…" he groaned.

A portal opened beneath him, and he fell through, landing back at the House of Mouse… where Hemi and Bianca were waiting for him with frying pans. "Now you're gonna get it!" Hemi shouted.

Judge Doom took out his DIP gun. "I don't think so, girls!" he shouted, then fired at them-

A portal opened between him and the Knock-Offs, with another portal opening behind him, and he shot himself in the back. "AAAUUGHHH!" he screamed bloody murder, being reduced to a sketch, then a tutorial, then melted down into nothing until the gun dropped on the pavement by a puddle, with a mask on it.

"Hey, a mask! …Who or what do you think he was?" Hemi asked.

"Well he certainly wasn't a princess, or even a knock-off," Bianca replied.

WG stepped up with a realistic-mop, cleaning up the puddle then burning the mop with her laser-vision. "I knew all that practice with my portals would come in handy," she said. "I guess when the situation is dire, my concentration is easier- if that makes sense."

Tracker drove up just then with a few other cars, and a bunch of people ran into the building. "Who are they?" Bianca asked.

"The Disney Animation teams for _The House of Mouse_ , as well as the team for Hanna-Barbera, Ruby-Spears, and several other companies that own the cameos… and there goes Bill Watterson." Tracker answered.

"Autograph!" WG exclaimed, trying to race to her favorite comic-strip author, but was held back by Tracker.

"We even found the artist for you guys to help Zagi. Thanks, by the way, for helping us."

"Oh, don't thank us JUST yet!" Bianca said, then grabbed the DIP gun, aiming it at the authoresses. "With this baby, we'll take over the club AND the roles of those princesses!"

She fired… but the gun sputtered, the gauge on the side reading 'EMPTY'.

She paled, then chuckled nervously. "Eh heh… gotcha?"

WG and Tracker merely crossed their arms.

*BOOT!*

With one swift kick, they punted all the Knock-Offs (included the re-drawn Zagi) out of the Club and across the city.

"But what about us?" Androm3da asked as he, Colin and FF2 stepped up. "Who's going to fix OUR designs?"

"Guys, you're authors, you own your OWN designs, remember?" Tracker pointed out.

"Oh yeah." With a snap of their fingers, the guys returned to their animated forms. "That's better."

They walked back in, greeting Mickey. "Boy, that was a close call, guys. For a second there, I didn't think we were going to make it through this one!" he said.

"Oh ye of little faith," Colin chuckled, patting the mouse on the head.

Minnie came running up just then. "Guys, come quick! Those evil hamster overlords are back, and they're eating all the desserts!" she cried.

"No cute fluffy ball of death eats our sweets and lives to tell it! C'mon, guys!" WG said, and they ran off.

Mickey shook his head, glad things were somewhat back under control…

*thunk*

Until a walnut hit him on the noggin.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

**Belt: Dun, Dun DUUUUUUUN!**

**A/N: Couldn't have said it any better myself. Well, read, review, no flames and give us cake.**


	19. Cyberston Lives!

**Disney owns everything *or at least it wants to***

**Fanatic owns his OC's**

0o0o0o0oo0oo0o0o0o0o0o0

Inside a dimension that rappelled with purple energy every so often, some of the energy looking like Optics and mouths. In this Dimension three figures stood before a machine.

"Is the Process complete?" Tempus asked, looking at the slightly smaller Transformer next to him.

"But of course my liege," The figure next to him said, "Everything is going as planned, the subject is ready for transport."

"Excellent Cadaver, you have done well."

Tempus then turned to the figure on his right, smaller in stature then the others around 6 ft. tall, the figure glanced up at him with a sneer on his face.

"I don't see why we bother, this guy has an ego bigger than half the Starscreams we've encountered over the stellar cycles." he commented.

Tempus glared at him. "It would do well for you to remember your place here, given your most recent failure." he retorted. The smaller figured grunted and looked away, clearly wanting to flip Tempus off. "It lies to you, to deliver him to the destination so that way his mission will be completed in due time."

The smaller figured looked at him and glared. "So I can get the ever loving energon kicked out of me again?! I don't think so."

Tempus's red optics narrowed and he raised his glowing hand, and it shot out a strand of energy n into the small figure. The figure let out a cry of pain as electricity flowed from his circuits. Cadaver smirked and watched on.

"Remember where you stand Hater, or I'll not only dismantle you, I'll give your parts to Shuck as a chew toy and make sure that your online for the entire thing!"

Hater lay on the ground wheezing, and struggled to his feet. "As you command Master." He said weakly, looking over at the machine and then turned back towards Tempus. "And what happens if he decides to spill the beans or surrender?"

Tempus chuckled darkly. "Pull his plug!"

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0oo0oo

Lefou sighed as he looked into his mug. Ever since Gaston had disappeared, he had taken over Gaston's lodge and bar, hoping that he would eventually return, possibly a plan to get back against the House of Mouse, which had thrown him and the triplet's out as well.

He sneered into his beer at the thought of that place- after all they had thrown them out, for no reason! …well there _was_ a reason but Lefou thought it wasn't a good reason.

"Oh Gaston, if only you were here." he said. "Maybe we could get out revenge on those Authors for what they did, and that stupid Mouse and his pals too."

Suddenly there was a flash of light, and he turned, seeing a black portal, sparking with blue and purple energy/ Lefou looked at his beer and raised his eyebrows.

"Maybe I've been _too_ depressed." He said to himself, pushing the beer away.

Out from the portal suddenly came a figure, looking A LOT like Fanatic97, except he had sunglasses and black clothing.

"YOU!" Lefou shouted and threw his mug at him, which "Fanatic" caught. And crushed in his hand to a fine powder.

Lefou grabbed another glass, and hurled it at "Fanatic" and it hit him in the head, but much to Lefou's shock he didn't even flinch. So Lefou threw another one, and another and another, each one he either grabbed and rushed or just let it him.

"Fanatic," finally got tired, and his arm extended out from his jacket, and it grabbed onto Lefou's throat extending from a distance of over 6 ft., Lefou noticing the mechanics that made up the extended portion of the arm.

"You're not Fanatic." He gasped.

"No slag, stupid." Hater said with a sneer.

"Then who are you exactly?" Lefou asked cautiously, grabbing a heavy bottle and slightly waving, it threateningly.

"That isn't important right now is it Lefou?" Hater said. "As of this moment I have something or should I say _someone_ for you."

Lefou was about to ask how this guy knew his name considering he had been out of the Disney limelight since the 1990's, when out from the portal came… (pause for dramatic effect)…

"Gaston." Lefou said with a gasp.

Indeed It was Gaston… except now he looked different. Covering his chest , the right side of his face, his entire right arm, and his left hand, and then going down to his legs was robotic circuitry, but his clothing as still visible he looked stronger, more masculine; slung on his back was another handheld shotgun; and around his waist was a belt carrying a wide variety of Knives and Machetes large and sharp enough to make WG drool over them.

"Gaston, you're alive!" Lefou shouted and ran to hug his "friend" only to smack right into his metal chest-plate. "…ow, and stronger too."

Gaston smirked. "Why yes Lefou, thank you for noticing. It is grand to be back after my um... _associate's_ boss here took me in." He said, glancing over at Hater, who smirked knowingly, as he walked back through the portal, which closed.

Gaston walked over to a stool and sat down, picking up a martini and he guzzled it down. "Lefou, I've been thinking-" Gaston began.

"Oh, Gaston," Lefou gasped. "That's a dangerous past time, remember?!"

Gaston, half wanting to mimic Darkwing Duck, bashed Lefou on the head and continued. "Lefou I've been thinking about one thing since I was kicked out of that rotten club, and it's my newest trophy hunt, ones that shall be placed on my wall forever, my greatest hunt EVER!"

Lefou shot up, stunned that Gaston had managed to hit so hard, "Gee Gaston what is it? The Beast?"

"No."

"A dragon?"

"Of course not."

"A Transformer?"

Gaston chuckled. "No Lefou… besides even with my upgrade I can't defeat them they are too resilient. No Lefou I have a much better prize in mind… Authors."

"Ooh… is Stephanie Meyer on the list?"

Gaston rolled his eyes. "Lefou, that joke has gotten old! …But, no, we'll go after her later. I'm talking more about… _Security Authors_."

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

Back at the Club, the Security Team was standing out front as usual, but with WG holding several cans, FF2 was next to her holding a Deck of Cards, and Colin and Sailor were also holding cans and cards.

Max stood with his arm up, and then he swung it down as WG threw the cans in the air and several gun shots rang out, each one hitting the cans 5 times each, FF2 followed with a Deck of Cards and each was hit with deadly accuracy.

Max raises his arm again and swung it down once more. The cards and cans were thrown up by Sailor and Colon...and then they were all blasted with two holes in them.

Max let out a sigh. "Sorry guys, another tie."

By the doors, Tracker and Fanatic scowled, as Tracker placed her guns back into her pack, and Fanatic shifted his chain-guns back onto the holders on his back, next to his blade sheath.

Tracker looked at him. "Where on earth did you get that good at firing weapons?! You're only 15!" she exclaimed.

Fanatic smirked. "Yes but I've been battling Tempus and his guys for a while now since I was… 14. And trust me, when you leap back and forth in time you get good at certain things." he answered.

Tracker shrugged. "Meh, can't argue with that- I've leaped back and forth in time plenty."

"Speaking of Time… WHEN THE HECK DID FANATIC GET HERE?!" Colin exclaimed.

"Oh, yeah… It happened yesterday while you guys were on vacation." WG said. "Garth, Wayne, flashback sequence please!"

Garth and Wayne walked up. "Sure thing, WG," Garth said, then he and Wayne moved across the screen, wiggling their fingers and making a 'doodly-doodly-doo' sound as everything got all wavy.

_~Flashback!~_

WG stood in front of the club, munching on a cookie, her cat TC sitting next to her with a picnic basket. "Pass me a soda, would you, mini-mew?" she asked the cat.

"Mew." TC replied, handing her a Mt. Dew.

Fanatic walked up just then. "Hi, WG, how goes it?" he asked casually.

"FANATIC!" WG screamed and immediately tackled him in a hug, knocking him off-screen.

TC looked at them for a second, then began eating a chicken-wing.

_~Back to the Future! …Er, I mean Present!~_

"I managed to get out of recovery. Sorry for taking so long to get back here, but I had to go buy THESE babies!" Fanatic said, holding up his chain-guns. "What did you want, a tender-hearted reunion?"

Colin sighed. "Never mind. Anyway, want another tiebreaker?" he asked.

"Are you kidding me? Yes." Tracker scoffed.

WG rolled her eyes. "Alright guys, this needs to end at some point... or else we will end up removing the sign and catapulting it through the air, AGAIN." she said.

Both Tracker and Fan looked at WG with looks of joy on their faces. "Do you think Mickey might let us do that now?!" Both of them asked.

FF2 shook his head. "Sorry guys but we don't have insurance on this place, and Pete mentioned in the first chapter that if this place falls into disrepair, we'll lose it... in fact we don't even own it!" he replied.

"Wait, but you guys own Pete don't you?" Colin pointed out. "In fact, why not force him to sell it to you guys by threatening his job?"

"Because, people already are thinking that the company is bad enough as it is, and we don't need it being let out that we actually do threaten people to get stuff!"

"You mean unlike the time that you-" Sailor began, only for FF2 to grab his lip.

"Don't talk or else the lips come off!"

Fanatic snickered and placed his hands in his pockets. "I'm going to patrol the perimeter guys, I'll see you bit."

As he walked off, Tracker called after him. "Wait, Fanatic! Get some Salt and Pepper shakers while you're in there for our next round!" she called.

Fanatic smirked. "I'll still win but okay!"

"LIKE HECK YOU WILL!" Tracker called back as Fanatic snickered, walking into the club, he looked around and began walking through the club patrons.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0oo0o0

Meanwhile behind the club, Lefou poked his head inside the club via the backdoor. "Okay Gaston, the coast is clear." he whispered.

No reply.

Lefou walked in, and turned around. "Gaston?"

Suddenly Gaston came running in, having lost control of his leg components, and he promptly slammed into a wall.

"Gaston, are you okay?"

"I'm Fine Lefou, thank you." Gaston's muffled voice said as he pulled himself from the wall.. "I'm just getting myself used to these new parts."

He said this, as he fired off a missile that blew up something off screen.

"Well at least we're back inside, and no one has spotted us yet."

"Hiya Lefou, Hiya Gaston!" Goofy called out as he walked past, and then he stopped. "Hey wait a minute... something's not right here!"

Gaston and Lefou gasped, as Gaston brought his gun to bear, ready to blast off Goofy's head if necessary.

"Hey Gaston, have you seen where I left my pen? I dropped it as I was coming in... uh, I think."

Gaston and Lefou looked at each other stunned, but Gaston looked around using his robotic eye and he saw the pen... on Goofy's ear.

"Why Goofy, it's on your ear." Gaston said.

Goofy reached back and pulled out his pen... and attached to it was a gold watch the size of Gaston's head. "Hey, I found my grandpappy's giant watch! Always wondered why it was so big. Anyway, thanks Gaston!"

Goofy then walked off grinning while Lefou and Gaston looked on. Lefou looked up at Gaston. "Well then, that was easy."

Gaston laughed, and slapped Lefou on the back with a clang... and a crack. "Well Lefou it's like I say, I am the world's greatest hunter, now then let us go and kill us some authors!"

Gaston stepped forward...and then his heels became a jet, and he screamed as he flew into the wall. "AAAUGH!" *CRASH!*

"Ohh, they're going to have a fit about that one." Lefou said.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Back inside the club, Fan was finishing up his rounds whistling as he walked, until he heard a scream.

Grabbing his blade he ran towards the source. "Alright, what is it and where does it not liked to be kicked?"

At that moment, Tracker jumped next to him, with a gun in hand. "Whatever he said I'll say it too!"

Both of them glared at each other, as Fanatic put away his sword and pulled out his twin Chain-guns for his arms.

WG appeared dressed as a referee. "Alrigh,t what are we shooting at now?" she asked.

"THERE'S A COCKROACH IN MY MILK!" DW screamed again, causing a groan from the Authors.

WG walked over to her. "Relax DW I'm sure it's no Cockroach.' She said picking up the milk. "More like it's a... nope, it's a cockroach…."

She looked over at Tracker and Fanatic and she let out a sigh. "READY! AIM!" She began throwing the glass into the air. "FIRE!"

The sound of gunfire erupted all over the club, as the milk glass, and cockroach where both vaporized by the oncoming blasts from the two authors weapons.

"Hey, I wanted to eat that!" Timon sneered, referring to the cockroach.

Everyone stared at them, as they blinked. "Umm… carry on!" Fan said, as he, WG and Tracker burst out the door.

"Okay, so who won?" Both of them asked as soon as they were in the lobby, looking at WG expectantly.

WG stared at them and looked them over. "I…..really couldn't tell...you guys blasted the roach to pieces!"

Tracker scowled. "Great, that means ANOTHER tiebreaker!" she cried out.

Daisy looked over at them. "What are you guys even doing trying to outclass each other, you're both great sharpshooters!"

Donald rolled his eyes. "GREAT?! At this rate they'll destroy the club!" He turned around. "I liked it better when there was only ONE crazy gun toting author around here."

He hadn't noticed, but Tracker and Fanatic had both their weapons raised. "First one to shoot the duck wins." Fanatic chuckled.

"Your on." Tracker said, and both let out a pair of shots that blasted off Donald's tail feathers.

"HEY!" The angry Duck shouted, as he began jumping up and down angrily. "WHAT WAS THAT FOR YOU-"

*BOOM!*

The three Authors and Daisy blinked as Donald was hit by a missile. "Okay, where did that come from?" Daisy asked nervously.

The three Authors whirled around to find…..nobody.

'They all blinked and looked at each other, not seeing Gaston and Lefou running for their lives, until Gaston's rocket pants activated and he blasted into the wall again.

"Oh great!" WG said. "So we now have a missile crazed toon to find!"

Fanatic suddenly pulled out a laptop and looked over the story so far. "Well we shouldn't have to wait too long. Any minute now Goofy will come in and say…" he began, then pointed over at Goofy, who was approaching.

"Hey Guys, have you seen my pen? I lost it again!" Goofy said disparagingly.

Fanatic slammed his laptop shut. "Right on cue."

"What do you mean by again, Goofy?" Tracker asked. "You've lost it twice?"

"No, three times tonight so far, I need to find it so I can take orders….hmm Gaston found it last time, maybe I'll ask him!"

Goofy then walked off screen leaving three VERY shocked and confused Authors.

"Did he just say Gaston, as in the _Beauty and the Beast_ character , who tried to kill us a few months back, and probably is here for revenge?" WG asked, trying to remind the audience

"No we are talking about Gaston from the Animated Titanic Movie with the rapping dog!" Fanatic said

"GAAAAAAHHHHHHH!" Both FF2 and WG and ran off, leaving clouds of smoke in their images.

Fan, rolled his eyes, right as a tranquilizer hit him in the back. He yanked it out of his back and chuckled. "They really ought to know better than to use these on me."

As he finished, 2X more darts than the number that WG was pumped full of in 'Gaston the Host' hit Fanatic. He blinked, feeling a bit woozy, then he shook them all off of his body. "I've got to...warn...the others." He said, and he trudged off as fast as he could.

Gaston and Lefou stared after him. "He is crazier than that blonde girl!" Lefou exclaimed.

"That was a girl...? Never mind Lefou, we need to stop him before he warns my other prey,"

"Too late, he just exited out the door."

Gaston looked to see that indeed Fan had made it outside. "Oh… dang it."

Right as he finished, Silver, Stalker, Tracker, *in werewolf form* Colin, and Fan with Sailor trying to hold him up, burst through the doors.

"Alright, where is that no good hunter!?" Stalker demanded. "I want to tear him a new one for making me a damsel in distress….yes I'm STILL P.O'd about that!"

'Gaston...what do we do?" Lefou asked, shrinking back slightly.

"Well let's see here." Gaston said, looking over his body. "Hmm let's try this button!" He said, pressing a button on his arm,, and a bazooka popped out.

Gaston suddenly leapt out of the shadows. "DIE AUTHORS!" He shouted and fired... not realizing that he had pointed the Bazooka in the wrong direction

The Six Authors stared at him... and then burst out laughing like maniacs. Gaston growled as he glared at them.

"Do you think this is funny?" He demanded.

"Yes." All Six said in unison, and then began laughing again.

Gaston, pulled out his gun and fired another mini missile and it exploded, leaving the Authors charred and burnt.

"Alright, we were going to let you off easy." Tracker said. "But now…."

With a cry of vengeance, The Authors leapt at Gaston who, screaming like a little girl, grabbed Lefou and ran.

"So it's one of those Episodes where the villain looks threatening but is actually a coward?" Silver asked.

"And I thought that gag would never show up!" Stalker laughed. They reverted back to their human egos, and WG held up several pictures of some hated celebrities who we shall refrain from mentioning. "Now, who's up for another round?"

"Better wait until Fanatic gets the feeling back in his body," Androm3da said, poking a limp Fanatic with a stick.

Fangface and Puggsy walked over just then. "What's all the commotion?" Puggsy asked.

"Oh, Gaston is a cyborg now and wants revenge… typical situation," WG said.

"Ooh, ooh, you're not freaked out? That guy tried to hunt me last time!" Fangface said.

"Exactly why we're not going to show any mercy," Tracker told him.

"Plus, we're not scared, we've been through worse," Fanatic said, slowly getting the feeling back into his limbs.

"Like what?" Fangface asked.

"Like that time we had to babysit Baby Shelby,"

"Oh yeah… I remember reading that chapter before it was edited," Puggsy said, snickering. "Think you could change it back?"

WG glared at him. "New round: first one to shoot Puggsy wins!" she snapped.

Puggsy yelped and took off, Fangface following.

"Well, c'mon. We'd better go tell Mickey about all this," FF2 sighed.

"You think he'll be mad?" Colin asked.

"Mickey? Mad? Nah, after all that's happened, he's become pretty understanding." Fanatic replied as Sailor and FF2 helped him walk.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

"WHAT IN THE NAME OF WALT DISNEY ARE YOU GUYS DOING OUT THERE?!" Mickey shouted once the Authors walked into his dressing room.

WG, FF2, Tracker, Fanatic, and Sailor Androm3da peeked out from behind Colin. "Um… fighting an evil cyborg version of a well-known Disney villain?" Colin said, meekly.

"In other words, Gaston is back, is made of metal, and is out for blood!" Tracker answered.

"I was actually referring to this shoot-off competition everyone's been complaining about!" Mikcey snapped. "…But, what do you mean Gaston is made of metal?"

"We don't know how or why, but apparently whatever hospital Belle landed him in gave him one heck of a body-cast!" FF2 answered.

"As for the shooting, um… we were trying to kill a cockroach!" Fanatic said, quickly.

Mickey groaned. "It's no use… The whole place is falling into disrepair, less guests have been coming, and we're under-insured! And Pete won't get off my back about it," he said.

"Again. FF2. You own the company. You have Pete's rights. Why not just help Mickey out and get the guy off the mouse's back?!" Sailor asked.

"Like I said before, the company is already in jeopardy as it is WITHOUT any executives threatening people to get their way!" FF2 answered. "Though, the most I could do is get more insurance for the club, as well as tell Pete he's got other roles to get to-" he whipped out a script. "Like the one he'll have in a continuation of _Goof Troop!"_

"Say… that actually gives me an idea!" WG exclaimed.

"Wuh-oh, light-bulb over WG's head. Wacky situations are afoot," Fanatic quipped.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Minutes later, Gaston and Lefou were on the roof. …They weren't doing anything mysterious up there, Gaston just had another malfunction that launched them to the top of the building.

"Gaston, no offense but… does the metal half of your body come with an instruction manual?" Lefou groaned, seeing stars.

"Do I LOOK like a sissy?" Gaston scoffed.

"I'd say so, the way you ran from those werewolves," came a voice, and Hater stepped out of the shadows. "Tempus is growing impatient, Gaston. He was expecting you to have gotten rid of those Authors by now… rather than run away like a coward."

Gaston glared. "No one calls Gaston a coward! …Plus, I didn't run away, I lost control of these robotic legs,"

"Yeah. Sure. You have one more chance- get rid of the Authors before sunrise, or the consequences WILL be dire." With that, Hater disappeared through the portal again.

"What now?" Lefou asked.

"Simple, Lefou… we're going to take things up a notch. We're going to use the 'stealth' approach." Gaston replied.

…just as his rocket-pants reactivated and they shot into the building next door.

"..first… find me the instruction manual to this thing…"

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

After finding a 'Controlling Cyborg Parts For Dummies' guide, Gaston and Lefou snuck back into the club, hiding in some plants. "Alright, Lefou, here's the plan: you lure those Authors to me, one by one, and I'll shoot them down while keeping perfectly hidden-"

"Hiya, Gaston. Found my pen again!" Goofy said, walking past the plant they were hiding in.

Gaston blinked. "…Actually, lead them to the alley. It'll be easier to dispose of them from there," with that, he snuck off to the alley.

Lefou snuck around the club, passing by Fangface's table. "I'm sure she was kidding, Puggsy." Kim told the shorter teen, who was now wearing a bullet-proof vest… and bullet-proof helmet… and bullet-proof jacket… and bullet-proof pants… and bullet-proof socks.

"Yeah, tell that to the duck!" Puggsy remarked.

Lefou crawled under a table. "They've gotta be around here, somewhere…" he whispered to himself.

"Like where?" a voice whispered, turning out to be Colin who was right next to him.

"I don't know, where do you guys normally hang out?"

"Basically out front. WG had to make a call, so FF2 is reffing for Tracker and Fanatic,"

"Okay, thanks."

"Don't mention it."

Lefou began to sneak away… though paused and looked back, seeing Colin standing there with a metal baseball bat, grinning. "YIPE!" he screamed, then ran out the door, Colin pursuing.

"I love being a security guard here- you get paid to hit people!" Colin exclaimed.

Moe's head jerked up. "Really?! Sign me up!" he exclaimed.

Outside, meanwhile, Tracker and Fanatic were looking up at the sign. "So… which state do you think we could launch it into?" Fanatic asked.

"With us, it would be better to guess which planet it would land on," Tracker replied.

Lefou ran out just then. "AUGH HELP HE'S GOING TO HURT ME I WANT TO LIVE MOMMY!" he shrieked as he zipped by.

"Was that…?" Sailor asked.

"Yep." FF2 replied.

Colin raced out. "I've got this one!" he exclaimed.

"Should we…?" Sailor asked again.

"Yep." FF2 replied again, and they followed Colin, dragging Fanatic and Tracker with.

Lefou ran into an alley, where the authors cornered him. "Eep!" he gasped, pinning himself against the wall.

"Alright, spunky, tell us where that hunk of tin you're hanging out with is, or we'll make you suffer a fate worse than fanfiction!" Colin growled.

"I-I can't s-s-say, my l-life is f-f-flashing before m-my e-eyes!" Lefou stammered, terrified.

"Alright, suit yourself!" Colin prepared to swing his bat, until it was shot out of his hands. "What the…?!"

"Sorry!" Fanatic said.

"Looks like I won," Tracker told him with a smirk.

"That didn't count, my finger slipped! Do-over!"

"Guys! We're in the middle of an interrogation!" FF2 snapped. "Can't you save it for later?!"

"No!" Tracker and Fanatic shouted at the same time.

There was a chuckle, and Gaston stepped out of the shadows, his cyborg arm shifted into a cannon. "And here I thought you were going to be a threat!" he scoffed. "But as it appears, even your best fighters are too dense to recognize the danger they're in. After tonight, everyone will know that no one is as dangerous as-"

"First one to shoot those sneakers hanging from the telephone wire wins!" Tracker exclaimed, and she and Fanatic started shooting at the sneakers, blasting them to pieces.

Gaston blinked. "As I was saying, no one is as—"

"Bonus points if you can shoot that leaf blowing in the breeze!" Fanatic shouted, and they were shooting at a leaf.

Gaston growled. "NO ONE IS-"

"Whoever shoots that trash-can to pieces first wins!"

"WOULD YOU TWO SHUT UP?! I'M ABOUT TO KILL YOU!"

Tracker smirked, then took aim. "First one to punch holes in that tin-can in front of us wins! …All in?" she said, winking at Colin, Androm3da, and FF2.

The other three Authors smirked, then pulled out their own weapons. "All in!" they exclaimed.

Gaston yelped as they started firing at him, but he dodged and started firing back.

Lefou ducked behind a dumpster, hands over his head and whimpering.

The shoot-out went on until everyone ran out of ammo. When the smoke cleared, the alley was a mess- trash cans, walls, fire-escapes, and even an occasional stray dog were either charred or looking like Swiss cheese.

Yet the Authors nor Gaston bore even a scratch. "Ha! Is that the best you've got?!" he sneered, taking his rifle off his back and taking aim. "You're out of ammo, out of ideas, and out of luck! Say goodbye, Authors!"

*Bang!*

Tracker shot her gun again. "Huh. One shot left," she smirked.

Everyone looked, seeing she shot Gaston in the arm. "Ha! You think one little bullet to the arm is going to stop me?!" he smirked.

"Oh. It wasn't a bullet." Tracker held up her gun, showing a wire that led out of the barrel, leading up to a small needle attached to Gaston's arm.

A taser-rifle.

"Oh, no…" Gaston gulped, as Tracker let loose 100,000 volts of electricity coursing through his cyborg parts, until he collapsed to the ground.

Fanatic stormed over and gripped Gaston by the throat. "Now, tell us who sent you, because it's obvious that not just anyone would give you all this junk," he demanded.

"Alright, alright!" Gaston whimpered. "Just don't hurt me! I was ordered by Tempus to-"

*BZZZT!*

A course of red energy shot through Gaston's cyborg parts, before he collapsed. "Is he dead?" Sailor asked.

"Hard to say… probably not." Tracker said, examining him. "Just in case, lets haul his carcass to the nearest prison."

Lefou was beginning to sneak away, until Tracker nabbed him.

"That goes for you too,"

WG walked on the scene just then. "Aw, did I miss target practice?" she asked.

"What too you so long?" Fanatic scoffed.

WG smirked. "Lets just say, I had a little business matters to handle…"

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

_The Next Day…_

"I'm telling ya, dat twit wouldn't know how tah use those parts if they fell on him!" John Silver was telling the other Disney Villains as they were talking about the incident with the Cyber-Gaston, the cyborg pirate finding it hilarious. "I guess it only goes tah show there's room fer only one cyborg around here,"

"Yeah, and even that's too much for me," Yzma scoffed, rolling her eyes.

Meanwhile, the Authors were using their powers to fix the place up, making it look as good as new. Unfortunately, it wasn't enough to satisfy Pete. "Shoot-outs, cyborg maniacs causing havoc, and busted-up property! I told you that if you didn't have the security fixed up around here, I'd be taking this club off your hands!" Pete snapped.

"Pete, please understand! We got more insurance, the place is getting fixed, and our security team-" Mickey began to stammer.

"Is made up of nut-jobs who cause more damage than they're worth! Those security guards you've hired are worthless! Without them around, there'd be-"

"More trouble than you think!" Mickey snapped. "Without them around, there wouldn't even BE a club now!"

Pete scowled. "Then what's this I hear about this 'Hater' kid that keeps showing up, huh?! If you think about it, he didn't show up until Fanatic did! I think these kids have brought in more trouble than they'd like anyone to know!" he snapped, then turned to Mickey. "I'll give you one chance, Mouse- fire those security guards and get some decent help around here, or I'm taking this club!"

Mickey crossed his arms. "If I fire them, it would be worse than having you take the club. As long as I'm running this place, they're staying!"

Pete grimaced. "In that case, better make your way to the unemployment line, because right now, I'm-"

"PETE!" came an ear-shattering shout.

Everyone turned... and Pete's face went pale.

Standing there was his wife, Peg.

"P-Peg! Why… what a nice surprise to see you here!" he stammered. "I haven't seen you since… uh… since…"

"Our divorce?!" Peg sneered.

"Er… yeah…"

"What brings you by, Peg?" Mickey asked.

"Well, I heard talk that Pete has management of this club," Peg answered. "BUT, what he didn't tell anyone was, as part of our divorce contract, I own 75 percent of everything of his, INCLUDING the club!"

"But-but-but-" Pete stammered. "That's not fair!"

"Neither is divorce, but I still asked for one. Now step aside and let the mouse run OUR club… or do I have to call up my lawyer and get the OTHER 25 percent of what you own?"

Pete slumped, then glared at Mickey. "Don't think that my ex-wife will always be around to get you out of trouble… I'll be ba—ACK!"

Peg grabbed him by the ear. "You can intimidate people later. Right now, you have 35 weekends back-logged in taking care of our kids! And guess what? You'll be teaching Pistol how to drive!"

Pete shrieked as he was hauled out the door.

Mickey breathed a sigh of relief. "Thanks for sticking up for us, Mickey." Fanatic said to him.

"No problem… Thanks for rooting through his personal stuff and finding that divorce contract," Mickey answered.

"Yep, now everything is back to-" Tracker began.

"HEY FF2! HOW ABOUT A WIZARD'S DUEL?!" Came WG's voice.

"YOU'RE ON!" came FF2's shout.

Tracker paused. "…never mind."

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

**A/N: Ah, good to have Fanatic back ^-^**

**Please review. No flames or MY KITTY WILL EAT YOU!**


	20. Who You Gonna Call?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Trivia: Finneas was the main villain in my old "Missing in Fiction" trilogy, still on Fanfiction(dot)Net. He was an evil warlock who wanted to destroy both the toon world and reality, only to be defeated by FF2,Tracker and WG. 
> 
> Fanatic wanted to put his ghost into the story and I figured, 'Meh, why not?'

**Warner Bros. owns Ghostbusters.**

**…Yep, it’s _that_ kind of chapter, folks!**

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

It was Halloween at the House of Mouse, which is obvious considering the day that this chapter was posted…

Anyway, it was Halloween and all the characters were trying to make original costumes, which was REALLY hard considering that most of the character-based costume templates were at the club!

Not that it mattered to the Security Team, who were dressed as their favorite Avengers. Colin was the Hulk, Sailor was Captain America, Tracker was Thor, FF2 was Iron Man and WG was Black Widow.

"I never knew you looked so good in leather." FF2 said smoothly...only for WG to smack him upside the head.

"Use that tone again and you're losing your manhood." She hissed… then turned and rubbed her aching hand. "Ow, ow, ow! I really need to learn not to hit metal…"

Colin snickered, and then was hit with a rubber chicken. "OW!" He shouted, and glared at WG.

"COLIN SMASH!" Colin shouted and jumped up and tried to pound WG into the ground. But then, WG pulled out her machete.

"Want to see how hard a Black Widow can bite?" She hissed. "I've literally laced this thing with spider poison to make it 2X deadly!"

Colin gulped and backed down "Yeesh, overkill much?"

"For WG, overkill is forcing someone to watch Twilight." Tracker said. "Trust me, she's got no problem with nukes."

WG snickered as she aimed a bazooka at Colin… and then quickly hid it before anyone took notice, only for FF2 to take it, and hand her a muffin. "Take it easy, sweetie. We're still on the first page." he told her.

Sailor looked around. "Hey Guys….where's Fan?" he asked.

Right then, a loud truck horn was heard, and a semi truck, with an armored trailer, and another one following it that had wings on the back drove around the corner... smashed into several cars, a building, a fire hydrant, and ran over three stop signs.

The Truck stopped in front of the stunned authors and Fanatic climbed out wearing a metal suit that was mostly white, with red arms and legs.

"JAMBO!" he shouted.. and fell flat on his face. "Ow."

"What the heck is that thing?" Tracker asked, looking at the truck, and it's MANY guns. "…Did you raid my locker again?!"

"No… please help me up." Fanatic muffled.

WG heaved him up. "Good Lord, what are you wearing, iron?" she asked.

"No, Titanium and Cybertronian Alloy." Fanatic said...right as he got slapped by WG. "OW!"

"Fanatic, we all agreed to dress up as our favorite AVENGERS, TRANSFORMERS ARE NOT AVENGERS, THEY ARE NOT EVEN MARVEL! WG shouted in his face.

Fanatic whimpered. "They were.. for a time."

"You're kidding me right?' She asked cynically.

"Nope." Fan said, and showed them all several issues of Marvel's transformers series, the first four, including the Spider Man crossover as well as the issue where Optimus Prime killed himself over a video game.

...No really.. he did.

"Okay, you've made a point." Sailor said. "But, how is that a Transformer?"

Fanatic smirked and then shouted, at the top of his lungs, "TRANSFORM!'

Everyone paused. "That was right in my ear, thanks." Colin sighed.

Suddenly Fan, leapt into the air and he.. .turned into an engine block and connected to the front of the truck, which Transformed into a robot, and then combined with the trailer, and then combined with the other trailer making a GIANT *and Shiny* robot.

"BOO YA!" Fanatic shouted.. and then accidentally punched the awning to the club, where it collapsed on top of the others.

"Oh Crap." fan said as he threw it off of them. "Are you guys okay?

The others lay on the ground, flattened like pancakes, all of them glaring up at Fanatic, who chuckled dryly.

"Oops."

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Meanwhile inside a secret place.. NOT Tempus's for once, a figure was watching the Security Team, but more specifically WG, Tracker, and FF2.

"So then, you really did think that a simple gun, could kill me off did you, authors? That your most powerful enemy would fade away from memory so easily?"

It laughed and then turned to see several people behind him, all looking like dead bodies, some really worse for wear and looking mutilated.

"Tonight, ghosts walk the earth, and I shall see it that we have revenge!" He said. The others nodded and began laughing devilish laughs.

The figure turned back to the viewing screen.

"Tonight authors, FINNEAS IS BACK!"

"TO THE HOUSE OF MOUSE!" Finnias cried out, as the other Ghosts flew off into the sky as Finnias laughed as he flew with them, heading for main street Toon Town...and the House of Mouse.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

Back at the club, the others had forced Fan, to give up his robotic suit, to one of the real Optimus's.. they chose the one from Transformers Energon...which he then ATE the suit much to their shock.

"How did he do that with no mouth?" Tracker stammered.

"Is that...technically cannibalism?' FF2 asked. "Because I would REALLY like to know!"

"I'm just wondering why optimus was so...FAT!' Colin said. "And why we are using caps-lock a lot right now?"

Everyone looked at Fan. "What?" He asked simply, crossing his arms...until WG grabbed him.

"STOP USING THE CONFLABBED CAPS BUTTON SO MUCH!" She roared, blowing his hair off his head and then dropping him angrily. "Bad enough you have a hard time writing some of this as it is!"

"Not my fault, Colin and Sailor never respond to my PM's." Fanatic said.

"Hey...to be fair dude you introduced yourself as King of the Crazies." Colin said.

WG rolled her eyes.. and then she heard a rumbling noise, coming from herself. "Oh man...I don't feel so good." She said, and then let out a burp.

FF2, placed and arm on her shoulder. "Are you alright?' he asked concerned.

"I'm fine." Wg said, right as she grew pale and groaned again, clutching her stomach.

"Something in your gut says otherwise.' FF2 said. He bent down and listened.. hearing a roar. "What the- did you EAT Hobbes?"

"No...not since he tried to hit on TC." WG said smirking.

Suddenly she fell to her knees and let out a scream that made everyone jump out of their skins.. literally.

The skeletons dove into the nearest closet and slammed it shut. While WG went to her hands and knees, growling.

"Ya know when I say I can turn into a werewolf, I DIDN'T MEAN THIS WAY!" She shouted. Groaning as her suit began to tear apart.

Suddenly she heard laughter, one that she was all too familiar with.

She tired tog et to her feet, as fur began growing on her. "FINNIAS YOU JERK, WHERE ARE YOU!?"

Finneas let out a laugh.

"Right here." he said, his ghostly form appearing. "And you my dear about to become my slave, the first of a transformed army!"

"That.. is so lame." WG said with a growl. "Honestly, that idea has been done to death!"

"Oh, good, considering I'm dead! Now then… TAKE THIS!" he took out a wand and tried to zap her.

Nothing happened.

"What the…?!" he waved it around.

"Finneas, do you know nothing about being a ghost?" FF2 spoke up, back in his skin. "First of all, once a wizard dies, so do their power. You can come back as a ghost, but you can't do much."

"Fine… I'll just possess you then, FF2, and make YOU kill your friends!" he shot towards FF2, trying to possess him-

*THUNK!*

A force shot him back as if he just slammed into a brick wall. "Dummy, if you couldn't possess him while he was alive in Missing In Fiction 2, what makes you can here?" Tracker sneered.

"Besides, I've accepted Jesus Christ into my heart, which protects me from all evil forces," FF2 said.

Fanatic looked at WG. "Trying to include religion in a Disney fic?" he asked.

"Yes, I like to share my faith with my writing… and Christianity is not a religion, it's a connection with God." WG replied.

"Okay, good."

Finneas snarled. "Well, lets see how well your faith does AGAINST MY ARMY OF GHOSTS!" he declared.

Fanatic turned to WG. "Oh, so it's okay that YOU use the all-caps, but I can't?"

"It's not my fault this guy's obnoxious." WG scoffed.

"Um, guys? Now's not the time to argue… look!" Colin gulped, pointing upward.

Everyone looked, seeing a swarm of ghosts flying through the skies, zeroing into the club!

"Oh, Snapple." WG said.

Finneas laughed. "Hope you enjoy your new guests! They've been DYING to meet you!" he quipped, then disappeared into the club next.

"…Did he honestly use that pun? That line's older than the first Mickey Mouse cartoon!" Sailor sneered.

"Well, there's just one thing to do then-" Fanatic began.

"Right! I'll go get Danny Phantom!" Colin exclaimed, then took off.

"And I'll go get the people from the _Ghost Hunt_ anime!" Sailor added, and ran in the other direction.

The four remaining authors blinked. "Anyone ELSE have some other ghost-hunting characters in mind?" Fanatic asked, a bit annoyed.

"I can't think of anyone else… except…" WG said, smirking.

"Except who?" FF2 asked.

"Buddy, when there's something weird in our neighborhood, who you gonna call?" Fanatic replied.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Two minutes later, Fanatic, Tracker, WG, and FF2 all walked in dressed as the Ghost-Busters team- when suddenly the Live Action Ghostbusters and the Extreme Ghostbusters and the Real Ghostbusters came walking up.

"Hold it! Which one of us are you ripping off?" Venkman from The Real Ghostbusters asked.

"Um… Live action?" WG guessed.

"Alright, so we'll be the ones to sue you," Live Action Venkman replied, and they walked off.

"It's not copyright infringement, it's called a tribute! Sheesh!" Tracker called.

"C'mon, guys. We've got a phantom to fry!" WG said, and they entered the club.

Already, Finneas and the ghosts had caused havoc… except with the Disney ghosts, who were mingling with them. All the guests were shrieking and running about.

"Time to charge up, boys- er, and girls," Fanatic declared, and they turned on their proton packs.

"Right, lets send that creep to hell where he belongs," FF2 snarled.

Just to give you guys a heads up, Finneas is the arch-enemy of FF2, having killed his mother and made his life a horrible experience, as well as Tracker's by messing up her future and slaughtering their whole family, up until we managed to alter the past and kick his butt like what was meant to happen. Tracker then killed him. (For those of you who are in the middle of the 'Missing in Fiction' trilogy, sorry for the spoilers).

Anyway…

"How the heck are we supposed to fight all these ghosts? There's got to be like, 100 of them!" Tracker asked.

"Just think of it as zombie-bashing, but with lasers instead of blunt weapons." WG replied.

"Okay- uh, by the way, you've still got hair around your face,"

WG rolled her eyes. "That's because SOMEONE didn't pay attention to how CARTOON werewolves transform, which is ENTIRELY different from the REALITY kind!"

Fanatic sneered. "Okay, okay, I'm sorry already! No need to emphasize and use all-caps repeatedly!" he sneered.

"Like what you do?" FF2 questioned.

Fanatic gave him a look. "Just… blast some ghosts already!"

Finneas spotted them, and sneered. "Attack the authors!" he shouted at the ghosts.

"Um… why didn't we do that once we arrived?" one ghost asked.

"Because I wanted you to scare the ever-living crud out of people first. When everyone fears someone, it gives us more power!"

"So… would this be a bad time to bring up your real name?" FF2 asked.

"What's his real name?" Fanatic asked.

"Igor Nakrapmeshelf,"

Everyone in the club paused… then busted out laughing. Even Finneas' minions were in guffaws!

"Oh, sure, go ahead and laugh!" Finneas sneered.

_3 hours later…_

Everyone was still laughing. "I was being sarcastic!" he shouted.

"Now's our chance, while they're in hysterics!" FF2 whispered.

"Right, set the trap!" Fanatic whispered to Tracker, who set the trap in the middle of the floor and opened it.

With several *Zaps!*, the authors trapped the ghosts in the beams and pulled them into the trap. "Don't look into the trap!" Fanatic called.

"I looked into the trap, Fan!" WG cried.

"Don't cross the streams!" Tracker yelled.

"Uh… someone want to give me a Ghost-Busters line?" FF2 asked.

"Think of one and I'll get back to ya!" WG replied.

Soon, all the ghosts were in the trap. "Oh, you think you're so smart because you trapped all the ghosts?! You think I don't have a back-up plan?!" Finneas shouted, then disappeared.

"Where'd he go?" WG asked.

"He must've faded out of defeat! We beat him!" Fanatic guessed. "It's miller time!"

" _You twit, I'm only invisible! Using my ghostly powers, I shall summon a creature made up from the first thing that comes to your mind!"_ came Finneas' voice, and he began chanting.

"Okay, we know how this works- no one think of anything!" WG said.

" _The creature has been summoned!"_

"WHAT?! That's not fair, we didn't think of anything!" WG pointed at Tracker. "Did you think of anything?!"

"No," Tracker said.

She pointed at Fanatic. "Did you think of anything?"

"No!" Fanatic scoffed.

"I didn't think of anything! So who-" They paused, and looked at FF2, who gulped.

"What. Did you. Think?" Tracker asked, darkly.

"All I thought about was a ghost-busters line!" FF2 gulped.

*Stomp! Stomp! Stomp!*

The ground shook, and they all ran to the roof-top, looking through the buildings. "Oh, you've GOT to be kidding me…" Tracker sneered.

"What is it?" Fanatic asked, looking down the street.

Coming towards the club… was a 20-foot tall Twinky©

"Let me guess…" WG said, turning to FF2, who nodded.

"'That's a big Twinky©,'" they said together.

"So, how are we going to defeat that thing?" Tracker asked.

"Well, we've got two options- we either fry the sucker like the Mr. Stay-Puft Marshmallow Monster… or we grab some silverware and chow down on the sucker," WG said, tying a bib around her neck. "And I'm leaning towards the latter…"

"We need to destroy Finneas before the thing gets here, it's the only way!" FF2 replied.

"Ah, it's no use… he took off like a coward and left the fight to a giant sponge-cake." Tracker said.

Finneas then appeared. "Want to say that to my face?!" he growled.

"Gotcha!" Tracker than shot him with her photon-gun.

"Villains- they get more vain and sensitive all the time," WG said.

"The trap is full, though! There's no room!" Fanatic said.

"Then you'd better think of a different option, because I can't hang on to him much longer!" Tracker shouted.

WG groaned and fell to the ground, her muscles rippling as she continued to transform into a werewolf. "Oh geez, WG, NOW?!" Fanatic shouted.

"Don't blame me, YOU'RE the one who wrote the idea in!" WG growled.

"You could've edited it out!"

"Guys, focus!" FF2 said.

*POW!* Finneas managed to break free. "Now you shall all DIE!" he shouted, then the wind blew around him as he began to chant evil phrases. "Forces of darkness, come forth! I summon thee!"

"Oh, great! He's conjuring up dark spirits! Now what?!" Tracker snapped.

"We do what they did in Ghostbusters II," Fanatic said, then took out a stereo. "Fight against darkness with love,"

He hit play, and the song 'Set Me Free' by Casting Crowns played out. Finneas's power weakened, but he kept at it.

"It's not enough… what else happened in the movie?" Tracker asked… then noticed Fanatic was singing along to the song. He looked at her, gave a nod, and she got the idea, as well as FF2.

Finneas screamed, then blasted the stereo, yet the authors kept singing, although FF2 didn't know all the lyrics and kept pausing, making Finneas laugh. "You think singing a song will help?! You're pathetic!" he sneered.

"It's not the song… it's the message," WG said, still transforming. "And that message is that Jesus can overcome any darkness! You can't scare us with your chants and spooky images, Finneas… no matter what nightmares we have or what situations we're in, He will always be there for us and help us overcome anything!"

"Yeah! As long as there's hope, love, and faith, you'll never win!" Fanatic added.

Finneas covered his ears, his power dropping. "Shut up!" he screamed. "Expressing Christianity in a story is… is… stupid!"

"We will not be silent! And it's not stupid! That's just what evil forces like you want everyone to think!" Tracker shouted. "But you can't fool us, Finneas! We're going to keep sharing our beliefs, regardless of what others say!"

"But isn't it sacrilegious to be doing it in a Halloween episode?!"

"Do we look like we care?" FF2 scoffed. "We can share our belief any day, we don't take holidays off… actually, some say Halloween isn't really a holiday."

"We're just in it for the candy anyway." Fanatic added.

"Aaauuuugh! You authors are insufferable! Shut your pie-holes already!" Finneas shouted.

"Uh, I don't think we ever will. And by the powers of Christ, we cast you out!" Tracker snapped.

"GAAAAHHHHHH!" Finneas then exploded into flames. "I've been defeated by the powers of love! Darn, I've really stooped low!"

They watched as Finneas evaporated, being sent to the bad place where he belonged.

Ah, Disney- where we can always rely on such dark images that scare the crap out of kids.

"Well, that takes care of that." Fanatic said.

"Yeah, just one problem…" FF2 said, then pointed over. "What about the twinky?!"

They looked, seeing that the giant Twinky was still around… and right next to the building. Everyone got their photon-packs ready-

"RAWR!"

Stalker leaped out of nowhere and attacked the Twinky, and- with speed only used in cartoons- devoured it right down to the creamy filling. She then let out a mighty *BELCH* that shook the neighborhood.

Colin and Sailor Androm3da then returned, with Danny Phantom and the cast of Ghost Hunters. "AH MAN! WE MISSED A GHOST-BUSTERS RIP-OFF?!" Colin shouted.

"Relax, you still have a chance to use some neat lines," Stalker said to them. "I mean, would you believe Finneas was defeated by the powers of love?"

"I'll believe anything as long as I have a steady paycheck," Sailor said.

"So, I get a cameo for nothing?" Danny sneered.

"Hey, you would have sooner, if brainless here didn't get us lost on Anime Avenue," Kazuya Shibuya replied, thumbing at Sailor.

"Is this true?" Fanatic asked.

"Yes, it's true… this man has no brain," Colin quipped.

"Well, the ghosts are defeated, so there's only one thing to do…" WG said. "MAX! Bring in the car!"

Max pulled up in the Ecto-1, and handed them the keys. "Thank you," Fanatic said, and the authors piled into the car.

All three Rays from all three Ghostbuster shows came running up. "HEY! THAT'S OUR CAR!" Extreme Ray shouted.

"I thought it was ours," Real Ray replied.

"It doesn't matter, STOP THOSE IMPERSONATORS!" Live-Action Ray snapped, and they ran after them.

_Ghost Busters!_

_[insert Ghost Buster's theme here- yes, we're even using the soundtrack]_

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

**A/N: …Who you gonna call?**

**Review. Please don't flame… and Warner Bros, we'll see you in court.**


	21. A Mysterious Event for Fanatic

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was written because, at the very start, Fanatic was a great co-author and friend... and still is today ^^

**And now for another chapter… written by WG. HIT THE DECK! *thud* …ow.**

**Alas, we still own none of the cool characters appearing in this fic. A few OC's, but that's it.**

**On with the chapter!**

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

It was a strange night at the House of Mouse… at least, in Fanatic's opinion- and considering how strange the kid is, that is really saying something.

For one thing, it started with a call from WG. "Fanatic… I'm sick *cough cough*," she wheezed over the phone earlier that afternoon. "I think I caught the Chinese Flu,"

"Well, I told you eating Mulan's dessert while she wasn't looking was a bad idea!" Fanatic replied. "But I understand. I'll just call in a recruit,"

"*sniffle* Okay… *cough cough HACK!* …see you later…"

And so Fanatic called up Tracker. "Hey, Tracker, WG's sick. Can you cover for her?"

"Oh, man, I wish I could, Fan… but I went snow-boarding last weekend and… well there was a cliff… and my leg is in a cast," Tracker replied.

"Okay- I should've warned you to leave those stunts to Calvin and Hobbes. They're professionals when it comes to riding off cliffs…"

"What do YOU know?" Calvin sneered… as Hobbes pushed him by in a wheel-chair, the six-year-old having a leg-cast, arm in a sling, and bandage on his head.

"He was just kidding, Calvin," Hobbes replied.

"No, I'm serious. What DOES he know? I'm still clueless! …And who's Calvin?"

Fanatic shook his head. "Don't worry, Track. I'll call up FF2,"

"Okay. Don't worry, I'll be back to beating enemies in no time!" Tracker replied before hanging up.

Fanatic called FF2. "Hey, FF2, you think you can cover for WG tonight? Tracker broke her leg so she can't do it,"

"I would, Fanatic, you know I would… but I'm on the Planet Ood, handling a dire situation- LOOK OUT!" FF2 replied… and there were sounds of destruction in the background. "GET BACK, YOU DALEKS! (I'll call you back)"

Fanatic blinked, then tried Sailor Androm3da. "Hey, Sailor, you think you can come to work tonight?"

"HELP! IT'S EATING MEEEEEE!" came a frantic cry… from Sailor. "Oh, sorry Fanatic, got a situation with the Scouts here. I'll try to make it IF I'm not devoured by then."

Fanatic sighed then tried Colin. "Colin… first, are you sick or injured?"

"Nope." Colin replied.

"Are you in a dire situation that you can't get out of?"

"Nope."

"Great! So can you come fill in at the House of Mouse tonight? The others can't make it."

"I would… but I promised Numbah Four that I'd go to the All-Out Wrestle-To-The-Critically-Fractured Smash Down tonight, so I can't make it."

Fanatic groaned. "Alright… bye." he sighed. "Guess it's just me, myself, and I tonight… OR IS IT?" He whipped out his cell phone once more.

…and called up his Transformers, OC. "What is it, Fanatic?" Silvermoon asked.

"Silvermoon, can you and the rest of my OC come and help me out at the club, tonight? The others can't make it."

"Sorry, we're busy."

"With what?!"

Silvermoon had already hung up.

Fanatic looked at his phone. "…Must be going though an OOC-phase… *sigh* It's official. I'm on my own tonight,"

He went to the club… only to find that the lights were out. Max wasn't out front, no guests were showing up… and that chicken from the April Fool's episode was pecking at the red carpet.

Arching an eyebrow, Fanatic took a giant calendar out of his coat-pocket. "It's not a holiday… not a Sunday… and no kick-awesome movies or television shows are premiering…" he put it away, scratching his head as he walked towards the entrance. "Mickey would have called if he said the club was closing… and Peg made sure Pete wouldn't try to shut the place down otherwise she'll triple his Child Support fees… So what the heck is going on?!"

"I'll tell you what's going on," came a voice, and Fanatic turned around…

…seeing Kim Possible standing there, her sidekick Ron Stoppable at her side. He had to suppress an excited scream.

"We got a distress call from Mickey twenty minutes ago- someone abducted him and the rest of the guests," Kim told him. "We've searched the whole building, but haven't found a… um, are you alright?"

Fanatic was standing there, looking like someone just gave him cake and said he could appear in the next Transformers movie. "I'm sorry… I'm just trying to overcome my excitement of meeting you."

Ron shrugged. "Eh, understandable. The last boy we met up with bounced around the room while squealing like a girl," he said with a chuckle.

"Ron? That WAS a girl," Kim corrected him.

Ron paused. "Whoops."

"An abduction, eh? I think I know who's behind this!" Fanatic said solemnly, then whipped out his cell-phone ONCE again. "C'mon, c'mon, pick up…"

Hater answered. "What?" he sneered.

"Alright, Hater! Tell me where my friends are or else I'll give WG permission to put you through torture that she has yet to unleash upon that one loudmouth from that one show she likes so much!"

"Dude, I'm not in this chapter… I won't be showing up until near the end of the season, remember? …Plus, I'm on vacation."

Fanatic arched an eyebrow. "I thought evil never takes a vacation,"

"It does now, dipstick. Now, stop calling me! You're using up my minutes," With that, Hater, hung up.

Fanatic put away his phone. "O-kay, it's not him. …Lets look inside, maybe there's a clue somewhere,"

They entered the club- the chicken following- and looked around.

Strangely, the club wasn't in shambles as Fanatic expected. The tables were set up nicely, the stage was cleared, no bloodstains or burn marks or graffiti or burrito chunks smeared anywhere… the Fanatic-shaped hole was still in the middle of the dining room floor, with traffic cones around it so no one would fall through again. "Odd… no signs of any struggles," Kim said, suspiciously.

"At least not here… Lets try backstage," Fanatic replied, and they looked backstage. "I'll check the dressing rooms, you two check around the projection room."

"Will do," Ron said, walking off.

"Ron… the projection room is THAT way," Fanatic pointed to the right.

Ron quickly turned around. "I knew that!"

Rufus, in his pocket, only shook his head.

Fanatic decided to check Mickey's dressing room first, knowing that's where he always was before the club opened. Yet there were no signs of any carnage there, either. "Weird… no signs of any violence, humor, randomness, or remarks about modern society anywhere," he said to himself. "Either WG's ran out of ideas… or she's let her cat do the writing again,"

"Meow!"

"Gah!" Fanatic turned, seeing a gray cat with a white spot on her chest sitting on the table next to him. "No offense, TC. I didn't think the ending of 'Muted Screams' was THAT cheesy… or confusing… or in need of a total rewrite altogether."

"Meow."

"What's that?"

"Meow meow,"

"There's clues in the basement?! Well, lets go!" Fanatic rushed out.

TC looked to the audience. "Actually, I was asking if I could eat that chicken," she spoke, pointing her paw at the chicken in the hallway.

The chicken, sensing danger, ran out of the club.

Fanatic raced toward the projection room. "Hey, guys! I think we should head to the basement! I got a tip from a cat!" he called… then slowed down. "Which… sounds odd… and why does it sound familiar?"

Stopping by a _Sailor Moon_ poster, he pondered a bit.

He then shrugged, then continued to run to the projection room, looking in… finding it empty. "Kim! Ron! Rufus! …Where are they?"

"Fanatic!" came a cry from Ron… coming from the basement.

Fanatic gasped. "They must've been kidnapped! …God forbid they're at the mercy of snapping turtles again!" With that, he raced down to the basement, searching around the crates. "Guys! Speak to me! Where are you?!"

Silence… save for some whispering he heard near the 'Alice in Wonderland' section.

"Aha! Unknown whispering that's supposed to be hushed yet is still loud enough for the protagonist to hear! Obviously, they're expecting me to sneak around the corner, where an ambush awaits… ha! As if anyone falls for that anymore." he went around the other way, climbing on some crates and peering down, seeing all was dark. "Hmm… where are the culprits?"

A figure rose up behind him just then. "Meow!" it exclaimed.

"YOW!" Fanatic, out of surprise, fell off the crate and onto the floor. "Oof! …didn't expect that." he looked up, seeing a fat orange cat with a little white on its tummy. "Tiger! What are you doing here?"

"The same thing the rest of us are doing here…" came another voice from beside him.

The lights came on, and Fanatic gasped at what he saw around him… cake, presents, laser-tag games, a giant screen showing clips from all the _Transformer_ shows and movies, a piñata in the shape of his science teacher, and a fountain with different nozzles spurting out his favorite sodas! Oh, the horror! The inhumane HORROR!

…Er, wait. That's not horrible.

"Whoa! What the…?!" Fanatic gasped.

"Surprise! Happy birthday, Fanatic!" All the guests and staff and OC exclaimed, popping up.

"Didn't think I wouldn't do something special for you, did ya?" WG asked, smirking.

"Actually, I did… But this is cool!" Fanatic said.

"Yeah, we spent all last night setting it up. We all pretended to be sick, injured, or in a deadly situation, and had everyone meet up down here to make it look like something mysterious was going on. We even had Kim and Ron come to put icing on the cake- er, no pun intended,"

"And we even invited someone else to come to the party," FF2 said. "Hey, Critic!"

The Nostalgia Critic walked up, having an autographed set of his _That Guy With The Glasses_ DVDs (including Kickassia, Suburban Knights, and To Boldly Flee) and trading cards. "Happy birthday kid. Your friends ordered these for you… and one of them wouldn't stop stalking me unless I made a guest appearance," he said, giving a glare at the authoress.

"Oh. My. GOSH! THANK YOU!" Fanatic exclaimed, hugging the merchandise.

"You're welcome. Can I leave now?"

"It's either stick around for a while, or we'll make you work with the guys from TMZ again," FF2 said.

Critic paused. "…Anyone up for cake?"

"And… we also found you this," Tracker said, handing him a Cliffjumper action figure _._

"Cliffjumper!" Tears began to form in his eyes. "Oh, geez guys, I don't know how this could get any better…"

"Oh, just watch! You see, we met up with some people in Hollywood, and persuaded them to let us get the first viewing of… _Dear Mr. Watterson,"_ WG clicked a remote, and on the screen, the documentary about the impact Calvin and Hobbes had worldwide began to play.

"AND, since Disney owns almost anything now, I talked a few people into making a new Transformers television series… starring you and your OC, based off your fanfictions." FF2 added. "You'll be helping with the writing and everything, just so nothing gets rehashed."

"I think I'm going to cry…" Fanatic said, his eyes bubbly. "You guys are the BEST!"

"Well, lets not just let this go to waste, guys! Lets party!" Tracker said.

Rufus clicked a button on a stereo, and Stan Bush's song, 'Dare' began to play.

_~Dare- dare to believe you can survive_

_You hold the future in your hand_

_Dare- dare to keep all of your dreams alive_

_It's time to take a stand_

_And you can win, if you dare~_

For once, after a long while, the House of Mouse actually had a fantastic evening.

All for Fanatic.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

**A/N: HAPPY BIRTHDAY, BUDDY!**


	22. The Proposal (Part One!)

**We do not own any of the Characters used here!**

**Because if we did we'd have cancelled all of Disney's REALLY BAD shows and replaced them with new versions of these toons!**

0o0o0oooo0o0oo0o0o0o0o

It was Autumn in Toontown, the weather was getting colder, the days were getting shorter and the leaves were falling off the trees and blowing all over the place.

"AHHHH!" Calvin shouted as he ran away from a giant swirl of leaves that was trying to eat him.

In other words Fall was no stranger to Toontown, and it lead the way to a day involving a fat guy stealing the birthday of Christ to shove his fat butt down a chimney to deliver presents and promote Coca Cola .

WG, looked up at the last paragraph. "Let it go Fanatic. You know there IS a veggie-tales movie that tells the story of what Santa has to do with Christmas… Besides, I'm more pissed that the government is trying to take Christ out of Christmas, so let go of your grudge against Santa."

"What?" The younger Author asked. "How come I'm not allowed to write about my grudges but you are?"

WG chuckled. "Because, I'll tell you when you're older."

"I've seen _Act of Valor_ in theaters, AND I saw _Marley & Me_...and I only cried for 2 weeks" Fan said.

"Well, that's shorter than my time after seeing that film." Tracker said with a sneer. "Whoever made those trailers that showed it as a family comedy had better pray that I never find them!"

'Why are we talking about the world's saddest movie all of a sudden?" FF2 inquired.

"Because we need to spend some time until the Plot arrives- he's stuck in traffic from what he said when he called." Colin responded. He then looked at the reader. "What, don't YOU have your fanfics plot on speed dial?"

"Since does a plot have speed dial?" Tracker asked.

"Since now." Said Fan.

"Ya know, we REALLY need to change up how these Episodes open- it either starts out with an opening narration about the club, and then cuts to us talking or it's an opening with the villain doing something." FF2 stated.

"Well we've differed a few times but you have a point." WG stated.

"Relax, the next four Ep's will change it up a bit." Fan said with a grunt. "Trust me on it."

At that moment, Plot ran up to them. "Sorry I'm late guys, there was a traffic jam that was backed up all the way to the highway!" he told them.

"You're fine." Tracker said.

"Yeah, we're just using up some filler," Sailor Androm3da added.

"Thank goodness." Plot said, as he stood next to them.

"Um, aren't you going to enter the club?" Colin asked.

"No."

"...is this an Ep focused on us?"

"Sort of."

"Is this going to rip off a Cliche?"

"Most likely."

Colin smirked. "Bring it on."

Right at that moment, they heard/saw Ron Stoppable from Kim Possible walking along, with his pet naked Mole Rat Rufus on his shoulder.

WG turned to the reader. "Hey, we've seen stranger pets."

They could hear Ron talking with Rufus- well somewhat as he came into view. "eh… whatever music was playing whenever Ron was talking about his feelings in _So the Drama_." Fan said, as Ron began talking,

*AND NOW FOR A BRIEF COMMERCIAL!*

**Friends, has this ever happened to you? You're tired, worn out, people keep trying to post your personal matters online without permission, and all you want to do is rest but no one will allow you to? WELL WORRY NO MORE, because we have an Offer!**

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"Hey go back to that!" WG pleaded.

"Sorry but Ron was done talking about how he was worried about proposing to Kim." Fanatic said, as he ate the remote for the Fanfic.

Ron, looked up. "You guys… heard all that?" he asked, nervously.

"Well kind of hard _not_ to." Tracker said. "You're standing right next to us!"

Ron looked and indeed saw that he was in fact standing right next to the authors, and shuffled away a little bit. "Sorry guys, but um well it's been like 6 years since the show got cancelled and I've been waiting for this for a while… so I'm kind of nervous."

FF2 chuckled and put his arm around Ron. "Don't worry about it Ron, I'm sure it will go fine, the worst she could do is say no…...she won't because we like official pairings here!" he said.

Ron looked at him. "Dude, are you even married?"

"I have a girlfriend."

"Oh yeah, who?"

"WG."

Rons stared at him for a few seconds, "So have you gotten married?"

"Ah, no… except that time when AWMonopoly Man 000 dared us to in one of her deleted 'Calvin and Hobbes' stories, but that was before we had an official relationship… plus it wasn't really a legit marriage since the Keeper of the Peace was his bartender OC,"

"Um… okay."

"So is this going to be like that plot where the person is on a date and he wants it to be perfect so his "Friends" change up stuff and almost ruin it until either someone unexpected comes into the help or he realizes it's best to just be himself?" WG asked.

"We finally get to use this plot?" Colin asked. "And here I thought it would be used for FF2 and WG."

Fanatic smirked. "I'm ALL about the 'people haven't done or they did this anyway' gags, but I'm going to make it fresh and original!"

"Hence, Darkwing Duck: The Movie." WG finished.

Ron paled. "Um, shouldn't I get my real friends in on this?" he asked.

"Ron, I'll put it this way….in the toonverse I'm the CEO of Disney...I am your friend… who's going to get you a Season 5!" FF2 said happily.

"Oh no." Ron said. 'But Season 4 was…..meh!"

"Don't care!" WG screamed, and then turned to Fanatic. "Are the landmines set?"

"Yes, and I have the circus afro, leather jacket, clown shoes, parachute pants, sun glasses, meatball subs, the Nukes are armed, the machine guns are loaded, the spears have snake venom on the tips, the cannons are loaded, and the milkshakes are ready."

Ron blanched. "I want to marry her, not kill her!" he snapped.

Fanatic was now noticeably looking at a set of blueprints going over them carefully. 'So If I put the turrets here, and the missile launchers can go here as planned- wait no that gives me no room for the Microwave…"

"Ignoring him," FF2 narrated, rolling his eyes, and turned back to the Disney character. "We'll help ya Ron... minus the goofy outfits," he turned to the reader. "Look, just because we are doing a cliche plot doesn't mean that we won't change it up."

"But," Ron tried to protest, but the other Authors lead him inside.

"Trust us!" Tracker said happily.

As they walked into the club, Max called out to them. "Guys wait, who's going to guard the club!?"

"…Place the Weapons Vault under the floor, or at least the entrance," He heard Fanatic say as the Author looked up. "What do you think WG, should I got with the Atomic or the Nuclear… Hey where did everybody go?"

0oo0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0oo0o0o0

Inside the Club, The Authors had dragged Ron to Mickey's room to help him get advice and/or get a table reserved.

"Why are we here again?" Colin asked.

"To get help from Mickey, since he and Minnie have been married since...forever." FF2 said.

"I thought that them being married was never proven."

"Disney himself considered them married."

"Oh, but what I really meant was, IT'S CROWDED IN HERE!"

Colin was right, everyone had squeezed themselves into the room, minus Fanatic, who was still looking over Blue Prints outside (which was good because Fanatic had slight claustrophobia which would result in a panic attack.)

"Can we take this outside please?" Mickey demanded. "I'm starting to get a cramp and my mirror is cracking...and I'm the one pressed up against it!"

"Look, we just need advice to help Ron propose to Kim and we'll be out of your hair!" Tracker said, nudging Ron forward.

"I really don't need...' Ron began but Mickey sighed.

"Look guys, while I am married to Minnie… I really can't tell you it was supposed to be a cartoon but when WWII broke out we had to go to war cartoons, but we got it filmed far enough that I did propose and we got married... during the war."

"Oh yeah, the incident that blew up that one studio here in the tooniverse….." FF2 recalled.

Mickey cringed. "Yeah don't bring that up….EVER. Now I need to prepare and that's all the advice I can give."

"But that wasn't really advice." Ron pointed out.

Right at that moment, Rufus climbed onto his shoulder….which pushed Tracker aside and into FF2 who fell forward, and he hit WG, who whirled around and hit him, but he ducked and she ended up socking Colin into Sailor, who threw Colin off and attacked WG, and WG reached for her machete which she just couldn't find, which Tracker stole and she shot her gun and she missed, and then Colin deflected with his fist, and Mickey pushed them all out the door.

"If you guys are going to react the Ultimate Showdown, don't do it in my dressing room!" he said, as he slammed the door.

"Hey….I should do that for Christmas!" WG said happily. "I'll be chuck Norris, and my sisters can be Indiana Jones and Batman!"

Ron sighed as he got up. 'Well thanks for the "help" guys I should probably get to my table," he muttered.

"Oh no, this plot isn't going to die on us now!" Tracker snapped. "We're going to help you make this the BEST proposal ever!"

Rufus sighed, and Ron groaned.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

Later at Daisy's desk, Kim walked in, dressed in her prom dress from _So the Drama_. As she walked in, she saw Fanatic leaning against the desk, looking over Blue prints.

"Hey Daisy, Hi Fanatic." Kim said.

Fanatic raised his hand, and then paused. "Hey Kim, does your dad still have some of that Rocket Fuel?" he asked.

"The one that we used on Ron' scooter?"

"That's the one, I need some for the warheads."

She arched an eyebrow. "…War heads?"

"Yeah well SOMETHING has got to be able to damage Juggernaut, and we already tried a nuke….boy that was a messy day."

Kim cringed, as she looked over at Daisy. "Are the other Security Guards like this?"

"Yes." Daisy said blandly, but she smiled. "Anyway Kim, Ron has a table reserved for you in the upper portion of the club in the box."

KIm blinked. "What Box? …please tell me he did get us a cardboard box for a table, _again_."

"No no, a Box seat like table, a nice enclosed area…...very peaceful up in the club's upper levels, you can see everything!"

"Alright." Kim said nervously as she made her way into the club.

"Oh, and if you see as few warheads don't worry about 'em!" Fanatic called out.

Kim whirled around. 'What?"

"NOTHING!" Fan called back suddenly.

Kim looked back as she walked towards the club, mostly worried about what Fanatic talking about, considering that she hadn't gotten to know him very well, but she put those thoughts aside as she walked, into a window. Kim stumbled back, as she looked around and saw that she was in a small Red box room, which the door of suddenly closed.

"HEY!" Kim shouted as she grabbed the door and tried to force it open, she pried at it, and groaned. "I can't believe I left my laser lipstick at home!"

At that moment the room shifted suddenly, and began to move upwards. Kim whipped her head around to see that the club was falling away, and that she was rising, she could see everything above the club, including a space where a catwalk would be noticeably as the Elevator stopped, at the club's "newest" upper level, AKA the former VIP Room wielded to the ceiling, she could see the entire club, as well as the screen.

The Door opened and Colin, wearing a suit and tie walked in, noticeably peeved off. "Bonjour!" He seethed then said in French: " _Welcome to our new VIP level."_

…At least that's what he THOUGHT he said.

Kim looked at him. "You do realize you just asked me to massage your garbage in French, right?" she pointed out.

Colin tore off the suit and tie, leaving him in his underwear: "GAH! I KNEW I SHOULD'VE LOOKED BEFORE I SIGNED ON FOR THIS CLUB!" He said in all caps and stormed off, still underwear clad.

Right then WG appeared. "Sorry about that, he's insane, anyway come this way." She said as she lead Kim from the elevator and into the VIP room, where everything was set up like the president himself was coming.

"Hey I said REMOVE the water balloons filled with grease!" WG snapped. At that moment a net dropped down, and was caught by FF2 and Tracker who carried it away.

WG lead Kim to the table and had her sit down. "You boyfriend and waiter shall be here shortly. HEY FANATIC GET UP HERE!" She shouted off screen, running off.

Kim rolled her eyes. "Well… at least the atmosphere is good," she commented.

0o0o0o0o0oo0o0oo0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Meanwhile, while that was going on, Dr. Drakken, Shego, Prof. Dementor, Duff Killigan, and Monkey Fist were standing by where the elevator went up.

"Are you certain she went up there?" Dr. Drakken asked. "It could just be some addition for the security team or something."

'Why would they add a private area for those guys?" Shego asked, filing her nails.

"Well given that they are crazy, maybe it's solitary confinement and they need it, possible to help fortify it."

"It's not." Monkey Fist said.

"Oh yeah, and how do you know?" Drakken spat.

"I have resources." Monkey Fist said, as a large Green and Black Transformer stepped out of the shadows, with a yellow hook for an arm, and the other one was red and dark Orange.

Monkey Fist turned to greet him. "Hello Lockdown, do you have the evidence I sent you to gather?"

The Bounty hunter sniffed. "I'm no scout Monkey Fist, but I got the job done, now about my payment…."

"My Monkey Ninjas are stealing it as we speak."

Lockdown smirked. "Good, I need all that energy. Anyway Fist, here's your evidence," The Bounty Hunter handed him a holographic pad *Data pad is the proper term* which had videos and recordings and photos of the Authors plans to help Ron propose to Kim.

Monkey Fist showed the others what Lockdown had gathered, showing off video clips of Ron getting the ring, and him talking about his plans in LONG detail. At that point Lockdown left to get some energon, and came back, while Shego went to get a Soda, and a Hot dog, Killigen practiced his swing, while Drakken fell asleep.

"There do you now see?" Monkey Fist said after an hour. "Our greatest foes joining together, in Holy Matrimony!"

"So?" Shego asked. "We knew it would happen at some point."

"Duh." Said Dementor, whose arms were full of popcorn bags.

"And you brought this to our attention because…" Drakken said, having just woken up.

Monkey Fist face-palmed. "We are the _villains,_ they are the _heroes_ , therefore it is our job to take their relationship, crush it, and then stomp it into the ground and destroy them in their moment of weakness!"

The others stared at him. "Look lad, I'm all one for destroyin' Kim Possible, but her and the lad are tight." Duff said. "It's hard to break those two apart- trust me, I've tried, and me manhood still hurts from it."

Lockdown smirked. "Anyone got video of that?" he asked.

Dementor looked up at him. "Why are you still here?" he asked.

Lockdown pointed towards Monkey Fist. "He hasn't paid me yet, and he's paying me to help ruin that proposal." He replied.

Shego crossed her arms and cocked an eyebrow. "What is he paying you with?" she inquired.

"The engines from the Kepler 1 & 2 from your show's Season 4, some of Wade's tech, The Centurion Project, and all of JR 48x Rocket Fuel that Possibles' father made."

Monkey Fist smirked. "And it's a deal that shall help us win, we now have the greatest Bounty Hunter in the Transformers universe...one of his incarnations anyway… and with him, we cannot fail!"

Sub-Plot walked by sipping a soda. "Yeah, that's what EVERY VILLAIN IN THIS ENTIRE FIC always says before they get their butts kicked," he muttered.

Monkey Fist turned to him. "Oh, what do you know?! You're a sub-plot!"

Sub-Plot rolls his eyes. "Plot was right- they never learn,"

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Back with our heroes, Ron walked over and sat down next to Kim, wearing the tuxedo he wore to the prom. "Hi, Kim… sorry I'm late, Tracker wouldn't let me come up here until my hair was combed right," he told her, sheepishly.

Tracker ran in just then, wielding a giant comb. "Hold on, I missed a spot! Gah!" she cried before FF2 pulled her off-screen.

"Girls- they always have to have everything perfect," FF2 commented to the reader.

Fanatic then walked over, dressed as a waiter. "…just tell me why he's walking around in his underwear, at least!" he was whispering to WG, who was pushing him on-screen. Noticing Kim and Ron, he stood up straight (causing WG, still in push-mode, to fall flat on her face). "Oh, hi guys! What can I get you for this evening?"

Kim looked over her menu. "Well, how about the special?" she suggested.

"Sounds good to me," Ron said. "Two specials-"

"A-hem!" Rufus piped up from his pocket.

"Er, _three_ specials, please."

"Alright, one moment…" Fanatic said, scribbling the order down, then turned to a kitchen located near the VIP section. "HEY GOOFY! BRING UP THREE TURKEYS LOADED WITH DYNAMITE AND SMEARED WITH GALLSTONE SAUCE!"

"WITH OR WITHOUT THE ARMADILLO SHAVINGS?" Goofy called back.

"HOLD ON!" Fanatic turned to Kim and Ron. "Would any of you like a side-salad with that?"

Kim and Ron exchanged freaked-out glances. "Um… no thanks," Kim replied while Ron and Rufus shook their heads.

"Alrighty then," Fanatic turned back, walking to the kitchen. "HOLD THE SHAVINGS!" he then paused. "Wait, where's WG?"

"You're standing on me…" WG replied, still on the floor.

Fanatic looked down. "Oops. …I guess I shouldn't have worn the steal-clad cleats today."

"Just help me up, please,"

Fanatic stepped off her and yanked her back up- too hard, as he accidentally threw her across the room and through the glass wall!

*CRASH!*

"GAH! I'm sorry! I'm still getting used to my strength!" Fanatic called.

*THUD!*

She landed on Ariel, Eric, and Melody's table. "I thought we were done with this gag!" Eric muttered.

"Note to self… start bringing a helmet and body-pads to work…" WG groaned… when her cell-phone rang. She answered it. "Talk to me. …What?! …Again!? …Seriously?! ….Okay! Bye!"

"What is it, WG?" Sailor Androm3da- who was carrying a piñata and bowling pins- asked as he passed by.

"That was my brother- he said evil hamster overlords are attacking his room! I need to go help wipe them out before they overthrow the populace! …Oh, and he needs me to help clean out his computer so that he can update HIS stories," she looked up to the VIP room. "HEY FANATIC! I'VE GOT A CODE-911-MUFFIN TO TAKE CARE OF! I'LL BE RIGHT BACK!"

"WHEN?" Fanatic asked.

"I DON'T KNOW… MAYBE PART THREE! BRB!" with that, she zipped out.

"…and just like that, she was out of their lives," Sailor Androm3da narrated, then hauled the stuff up to the VIP section.

"Here's your order!" Goofy called… loading the trays into a cannon and shooting them up to the VIP section!

*SPLAT!*

"GAH! HOT HOT HOT!" Colin shrieked from across the section, as he had to come back for his pants.

Ron shook his head, embarrassed. "I don't know HOW this night could go worse…"

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

**A/N: And that is only PART ONE of FOUR of a fun-filled evening! Next chapter, everyone continues to 'help' Ron, the Villain's plans unfold, we get more mayhem, and some uninvited 'guests'!**

**Please review, don't flame, and I have to go save my brother now. Byes!**


	23. The Proposal (Part Two!)

**Now for Part Two of our calamity!**

**Disclaimer: We still own nothing *sadness***

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

When we last left our heroes, the authors were helping Ron out with his date with Kim- only to keep messing everything up and causing him embarrassment (which shall continue in this chapter); Meanwhile, the Villains come up with a plot to sabotage the enchanted evening, with the help of a bounty hunter, Lockdown; and then WG was called forth out of the story to help out her brother, Anti-Twilight Forever- you should read his stories, they're really great. No, really! Go check them out! You'll be glad that you-

WG: ATF! ARE YOU WRITING OVER ONE OF MY STORIES AGAIN?!

Um… And now back to the story! *runs off*

…Okay, it appears the authoress will be a tad busy teaching her brother a lesson in touching someone else's property, so lets just pick up where we left off, starting with the villains.

Drakken and Shego managed to sneak into the VIP section- which wasn't hard, considering the authors were so busy causing mayhem themselves that they didn't notice. When they got up there, they found Colin and Sailor Androm3da chasing after a live chicken with a butcher knife while wearing Geisha outfits, Tracker bringing in a cake and setting off a detonator that caused it to explode, and FF2 was painting a picture of the couple… dressed as Superman and Batman…

We would explain all this, but even then it would be confusing.

"Um… do we really need to sabotage their date? I think the authors have it covered," Shego commented.

"Well… they're not villains, so yes!" Drakken quickly answered. "Besides, I worked a whole month on this plan, and I'm not going to give up now!"

Shego arched an eyebrow. "Um, Drak? It was Monkey-Fists' plan,"

Drakken pouted. "I know… but I'm taking credit for it!" he turned to the audience. "Hey, I'm EVIL! You think I care about copyright infringement?"

Shego rolled her eyes. "Whatever. Lets just get to it already,"

"HERE CHICKEN! HERE, CHICKY CHICKY CHICK CHICKY BOOM CHICK CHICKY BOOM CHICK CHICKY BOOM!" Colin called, running by with the axe while doing the Cuban Pete routine from _The Mask_ , and the villains ducked down to keep from being seen… let alone decapitated.

"…Before the authors beat us to it,"

At their table, Ron had his face in his hands, and Kim was still blushing. "You guys… are NOT helping," He grumbled to Fanatic, who stood by their table… wearing a circus-afro while still working on his death-list-thing.

"…add a crocodile pit here, throw in some explosive cupcakes, build a brain-wash room with every episode of TMZ there- no wait, that would be too cruel…" Fanatic was saying to himself, scribbling on a notepad. "I'll make it the Care Bears movies instead."

"So, um… any specific reason why you went this far to take me on a date?" Kim asked, as any girlfriend would if her boyfriend was desperate enough to let a bunch of psycho-authors give them an unforgettable evening (which was actually working- not even a severe case of amnesia would help anyone forget everything they've seen so far).

Ron rubbed the back of his neck. "Well, yeah… KP, you and I have been going out for a while now, and we've been-"

"HEY, GUYS, QUIET DOWN! HE'S ABOUT TO MAKE HIS MOVE!" Sailor Androm3da shouted… so loud, that everyone in the entire club could hear.

"What's going on up there?!" Hades asked from his table. "Sounds like they let loose a bunch of monkeys in that box,"

"Hey, watch it, cuz!" King Louie sneered.

Ron blushed. "Um… as I was saying… We've been friends since pre-school, and you've had my back on every mission- even kept taking me along even though I'm kind of a klutz," he continued.

"You got that right," Colin said out of the corner of his mouth… Tracker slapped him upside the head. "Ow! What?! It's true!"

"Shut up and start the music!" Tracker hissed.

Colin grumbled, taking out an album that read 'Romantic Songs To Set The Mood For An Enchanting Atmosphere (As Well As Can Make Tomboys and Manly Men Vomit'. He walked over to a record-player, putting it on.

[Now Playing: Some sappy love song- I don't care, I barely listen to that stuff]

"Ron, what are you trying to say?" Kim asked, curiously.

"Well… It's kind of difficult- especially after the evening a few people have given us…" Ron muttered that last part.

While Colin wasn't looking, Calvin popped up- having snuck in as well- and switched the album with one of those records he bought just to make his mom go into conniptions.

[Switch Song To: Something that includes heavy-metal and obscene lyrics that could make a grandmother faint AT MAX VOLUME]

As the record blared the loud, heart-stopping music (while making Sugar Mama downstairs faint), Ron clenched his teeth. "Some people… WHO AREN'T REALLY HELPING THIS GO BY ANY SMOOTHER!" he shouted, while keeping his ears plugged.

"CALVIN! GET BACK HERE!" Tracker shouted, now chasing the six-year-old with one of her shot-guns.

"HEY! IT WAS A JOKE! DON'T YOU GUYS HAVE A SENSE OF HUMOR?!" Calvin shouted.

"WHY ARE WE SHOUTING IN ALL-CAPS?!" FF2 shouted.

"BECAUSE THE CONFLABBED RECORD IS STILL PLAYING!" Sailor shouted, then took the record off and shattered it. "There. That's better."

"WHAT?! SAY THAT AGAIN?!" Colin shouted, apparently deaf.

"WHAT DID YOU SAY?" Tracker shouted, deaf as well.

"WHAT ABOUT CROCHET?" Fanatic shouted, also deaf.

"Anyway, KP, what I'm really trying to say is… Will you marry me?" Ron asked Kim.

"What?" Kim asked, loudly. "I can't hear you!"

Ron slapped his forehead.

"Alright, c'mon Shego! On to Phase One!" Drakken said.

"WHAT?" Shego shouted.

"PHASE ONE!" Drakken held up a little card that said 'Phase One' on it.

"OH, RIGHT!" Shego snuck over to a table with an ice-sculpture on it, kicking it up into the air and striking it with her laser-fists to make ice-shards impale their foes, while Drakken took out a laser gun and shot a disco-ball hanging overhead to make the glass to the same.

The effect? They struck them too hard, making them turn into itty-bitty pieces of glittering prettiness that floated to the floor. Oooooooh, sparkly…

"Huh, didn't plan this," FF2 quipped.

"Wow… sparkle, sparkle, sparkle," Fanatic said.

"Heck yeah, sparkle sparkle sparkle!" Colin exclaimed.

Drakken groaned and threw his ray to the floor and began stomping on it...and then it exploded, leaving him charred and burnt.

Shego sighed as she walked over, and found a Green Cart trolly, and threw him onto it, and walked away.

Tracker walked over to Ron. "If it's any consolation Ron, at least our hearing's coming back, and besides the sparkly falling stuff is nice."

Ron gave her a glare that looked half constipated and half angry...resulting in everyone breaking down in laughter including Kim and Rufus.

Ron glared at them all and slunk down. "Maybe a villain attack will kill me and put me out of my misery." he muttered under his breath. He blinked and then let out a large breath and sniffed. He jumped up and cried out, 'Who replaced my Mouth Freshener with Root Beer?!"

Colin and Sailor looked at each other, as Fanatic stopped drinking his Root Beer and spit it out (his breath now minty), and glared at the two, pulling out his Star Saber. "YOU TWO ARE DEAD!" He roared.

"Oh look at the time, I think I hear my mommy calling!" Colin shouted and he and Sailor ran off with Fan chasing after them, murder (literately) in his eyes. Fanatic then stopped to erase the word that had been written on his eyeballs in a mirror.

"Okay, seriously how did they do that?" He demanded and ran after them again.

0o0oo0o0o0o0o00o0o0o0oo0o

Meanwhile with the villains and Lockdown-

'Oy, why does the robot get his own title!?" Killigen demanded looking up at the last sentence.

"I'm a Bounty Hunter kilty, so I can be either or as long as I keep getting paid." Lockdown answered.

"Who ya calling Kilty captain Hook?" The Mad Golfer asked.

At that moment the real Captain hook ran up. 'Did somebody say my name?"

Lockdown smirked and pointed toward Killigan. "He did, and he said that your mother was so ugly, it made Yzma look hot."

"WHAT!?" Duff, Hook and Yzma (from the next table) shouted.

'You DARE mock my mother and accuse her of such hideousness?!" Hook demanded and turned around. "SMEDE, READY THE CANNON!"

Duff yelped as the Pirates ran after him, murder in their eyes and they charged out of the club. As he ran by, Yzma gave him the 'Call Me' gesture, making him turn green and retch.

Lockdown chuckled. "I love Toontown."

Monkey Fist glared at him. 'We just lost one of our allies in this endeavor because of YOU!"

Lockdown, raised his servos. 'Relax Monkey, His golf ball bombs aren't that discreet anyway, besides you still have me."

"Aren't I lucky?" Monkey Fist said, rolling his eyes.

At that moment, Shego walked up, with Drakken on the trolley, Drakken was still smoking like steak from a barbecue.

Monkey Fist, slapped his face. "Dare I ask how this happened… and how you could screw up a simple plan?"

Shego Stared at him. "It's Drakken…...he screwed up taking BREAD out of a drawer this morning!"

Dementor winced. 'Dat would explain the explosion...and the pink eye, ja?"

Monkey Fist groaned. 'Alright then, since Phase 1 of the plan failed I suppose it's onto Phase 2 ,"

Lockdown laughed. "This ought to be enjoyable."

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o00o0o0

Back up in the VIP space, things were not going better. Fan had opted to try and entertain Kim and Ron….by telling them "Romantic" stories involving himself, while Tracker and FF2 got some more food ready.

"And that is how Hater reduced my skull to a fine white Powder that spilled out of my ears, nose and mouth, luckily we managed to recover it all and now it only hurts when I do Long Division!" he said… while showing a slide-show of the events in detail.

Kim, Ron and Rufus, gave him looks of utter disgust.

Fanatic Rolled his eyes. "Wimps." he said.

Kim glared at him. "You just said that your skull was reduced to fine powder, and you're acting like it's an everyday occurrence!"

Fanatic glared at her. "You got a problem with it Ms. 'Save The World And Be Home By Dinner Time'?"

Kim clenched her fists as Ron gulped. "Oh no." He moaned.

At that moment, Tracker and FF2 came running in, with a whole smorgasbord of food, on a long table… so long that it actually had its own telephone operator and crossed the state line...TWICE.

"Here you are monsieur, enough food to make an elephant fatter than Fat Albert." FF2 said.

Everyone stared at the table, which had actual food on it...mostly from Fast Food Restaurants and they were done up to look fancy.

"Wow." Ron said, actually shocked. "That looks good!"

"It had better be, we spent 2 Hours combined all those drive thrus." Tracker muttered and FF2 shushed her.

"Anyway, we shall now try to make the romantic mood once again, by playing another song, and this time we have a way to make sure that one sabotages it!" FF2 declared.

_Meanwhile down in the Prop Room_

"I"ll see your golden suit of armor, and raise you this Gask MASK!" Calvin said, slapping a Gas mask down on the ground.

"I'll see your Gask mask, and I'll raise you a-" The Golden Falcon began...when they both sniffed the air.

Both of them quickly put on the Gas masks and both breathed a sigh of relief.

_Back with the Authors…_

Tracker sighed "Yeah so the Golden Falcon has a pal now."

Fan walked over. 'So it still reeks in there?" He asked, referring to the crate that the Falcon had been locked in. "Because I had no idea that –CHICKEN NUGGETS!" he saw a large platter of the things on the table, and he dived toward them screaming, as he dove into the pile and began eating.

"HEY!" Rufus said, indignantly as he was trying to eat some, so he bit Fan on the foot.

Fanatic Cried, "Yeow!" And turned to Rufus. "You're A Dead Rat! "he seethed as he pulled out his chaingun and began firing like a madman.

Rufus screamed and ran down the table as bullet grazed around him, somehow missing all the food, until he hit some giant Milkshake tubs, which exploded.

Milkshake poured out toward everyone, and Fanatic screamed as Milkshake washed over him and it sent him toward the Window…

Meanwhile down below, along laser cannon had been set up *The one that Drakken had tried to steal in _Ron Millionaire_ * and it was aimed at the VIP room.

'This is it!" Monkey Fist said, gleefully rubbing his paws together. "On my word, take fire!"

"Um, can I say something, first?" Shego asked.

"What?"

"INCOMING!"

*SPLASH AND CRASH!*

Shego had dived out of the way, as milkshake rained down upon the villains… and Fanatic landed on the cannon, destroying it on impact. "Ouch." He muttered.

Lockdown sighed. "Only in the tooniverse can one kid fall from 20 feet, and break an enormous cannon!" he commented.

"CONFOUND IT! I just had this suit dried-cleaned!" Drakken shouted, wiping milkshake liquid off his suit.

"And I just got my hair done ze way I like it," Dementor added, pitifully.

"Thank God I had a spare built, just in case," Monkey Fist said, rolling in a copy of the cannon.

Drakken's eyes widened. "Monkey Fist, wait!" he cried out.

Too late. Monkey Fist pushed the remote-

*POOF!*

An onslaught of flower petals, kittens, cherry-filled chocolates, and little plastic heart-shaped confetti shot into the VIP room. One kitten landed on the record player, making the song from the end of _So The Drama_ (the one Kim and Ron danced to) began to play.

Monkey Fist's face was a look of total disbelief (like this: **D8** hee hee) and he turned sharply to Drakken. "DOCTOR DRAKKEN! WHAT THE FLYING FISTS OF FURY?!" he screamed in his face.

"I-I forgot that's where I stored the props for my Valentines Day ploy!" Drakken explained. "See, I was going to use that stuff to set up around a warehouse, and lure Kim Possible into a sense of security, believing it was a romantic tourist attraction for couples- except, I have no idea where the kittens came from,"

Duchess walked up just then. "Excuse me, but have you've seen my children?" she asked.

"Up in the VIP section," Monkey Fist replied, keeping his face in his palms in utter embarrassment. "On to Phase Three, then…"

"What's Phase Three?" Shego asked.

"I'll tell you when I think of it!"

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Back up in the VIP section, Kim was stroking Marie. "Are you guys just messing things up just to make the good parts more romantic?" she asked Tracker.

"Honestly, we have absolutely no idea where this stuff keeps coming from," Tracker replied.

"Yeah, well, before anything else happens to ruin it, I'm going to hurry up and say what I need to say," Ron said, quickly. He turned to Kim, taking her hand. "Kim, I love you… and the reason why I asked you here tonight is because…"

Kim smiled. "I will."

Ron's eyes widened. "You do? I mean, you really want to? …Wait, we're talking about the same thing, right? Just so it's not going to be one of those circumstances where I'm trying to say something but you mistake it for something different, right?"

"Well, from your speech at the start of the chapter, and considering all the trouble you're going through here, I'd say you're asking to marry me."

"How did you figure it out?!" Colin asked, amazed.

"Dude, she's Kim Possible- she learned how to deactivate an alarm system when she was 13!" FF2 replied.

Ron's face lit up. "YES! She said YES!" he exclaimed, whooping and spinning around the room. "EVERYBODY MAMBO!"

Outside, Max paused. "Did someone just use one of my movie quotes?" he asked the audience.

Everyone applauded. "Looks like our work here is done…" Fanatic sighed happily from downstairs, hearing the celebration.

"What work?! You guys nearly trashed the evening!" Shego commented… then rubbed her chin. "Come to think of it, I wonder why Monkey Fist didn't just team up with you,"

Fanatic looked around, seeing Monkey Fist was absent. "Where is he, anyway?"

Shego thumbed behind her. "Demanding a refund."

Monkey Fist was chasing after Lockdown, who was carrying crates full of the stuff he bribed him with. "GIVE IT BACK, YOU ROBOTIC WEASEL! HIRING YOU DID NOTHING!" he shouted. "THE DEAL IS OFF!"

"TOO LATE! IT'S AS GOOD AS SPENT!" Lockdown shouted back, breaking through the ceiling and escaping.

Mickey, from the stage, blinked. "Well… Congratulations to Ron and Kim, despite the hazards of tonight," he exclaimed to the crowd. "Looks like, once again, things worked out-"

*CRASH!*

A large, purple van broke through the wall just then. "WHAT THE HECK?!" Mickey shouted.

Several people piled out of the van, and Shego and Kim's eyes widened. "Oh, no… How'd THEY find us?!" Kim demanded.

"Who are they?" Tracker asked.

"We're part of the LOIASF!" One of the strangers declared. "League Of Incredibly Annoying Slash Fans! We represent the Kego fans!"

"And we're hear to break up the engagement...!" Another declared, taking out a machine gun. "And we'll do anything to make KimxShego a reality!"

Kim slapped her forehead. "Figures." Ron muttered, crossing his arms.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

**A/N: And there's Part Two. Next chapter, a battle against the slash fans!**

**Please review. No flames, please!**


	24. The Proposal (Part Three!)

**And now, back to the crazy.**

**Btw, saw 'Frozen' in theaters, great movie, expect cameos later on!**

**Disclaimer: yadda yadda yadda WE GET THE MESSAGE! ON WITH IT!**

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

And that's when Calvin and Hobbes unleashed a mighty can of Kick-Butt upon their enemies, snowballs and water-balloons shooting through the air, stuffing and blood and underwear lying all around, and just when it seemed like victory, out came…

Oops, wrong story! (shuffles through papers) …now where was it? Ah, here we go!

*ahem*

"YOU'VE GOT TO BE FRICKIN' KIDDING ME!" Fanatic screamed at the top of his lungs when the Kego Slash Fans arrived. "When are you people GOING TO LEARN that when two people are _mortal enemies_ , it means there's _no chemistry between them whatsoever_!"

"Dude, we've been saying that to OUR slash-fans, and they still don't get it!" Dib called from the 'Invader Zim' table.

"Yes! And that the true definition of _slash_ means to ANNIHILATE your enemies in the bloodiest way possible!" Zim added.

"I thought 'slash' was that little diagonal line on the keyboard," GIR spoke up, holding up a slash (which looks like this: **/** , in case none of you knew).

"Kim and Shego are PERFECT for each other, though!" A Kego Slash Fan shouted.

"How?!" Tracker demanded.

"Well, um… they're both girls… they both have kick-awesome moves… their partners are bumbling idiots… and they both make a hot, sexy pairing!" _(A/N: These people clearly do not represent all Kego fans, as you can tell.)_

"Dear Lord…" Shego growled, face-palming.

"Did he just compare me to you?!" Drakken sneered to Ron.

"Guys… if Kim and Shego were the 'true' pairing, the Disney channel would have put them together- then get restricted by parents," Colin spoke up.

"Yeah, besides Kim and Ron make a better couple!" FF2 replied.

"HOW?!" Another Kego Slash Fan demanded, mocking Tracker.

"They've been childhood best-friends since preschool, Ron has complete devotion to Kim and has always had her back, and vice versa, and THEY MADE A FRICKIN' MOVIE ABOUT IT THAT RAN INTO THE FOURTH SEASON!" Fanatic replied, while reading off a long, LONG list of reasons. "And there's plenty more where that came from! For instance, they also have TWICE more many fans for the pairing, they tend to be opposites yet it helps them complete each other…"

_29,046, 600 reasons later… holy crap, he's on a roll!_

Everyone was slouching around, nearly asleep… Except for Drakken- he WAS asleep, a bit of drool hanging off the corner of his mouth… as Fanatic was coming to the end of the list (at last).

"…And finally, Shego and Drakken deserve a chance with each other!" Fanatic finished.

"Wait, what was that last part?!" Shego asked, appalled. "Me and DRAKKEN?! Are you crazy?!"

"Yes."

"Yeah, well… they're not a sexy couple!" A Kego Slash Fan spoke up.

"Enough with this reasoning! Time for bloody violence!" Another Kego Slash Fan shouted, wielding a sword.

"Dear Lord, guys! How are you willing to go, over some stupid fandom?!" Sailor Androm3da demanded.

"ALL THE WAY!" All the Kego Slash Fans shouted, then ran forth with their weapons. "YAAAAAAH!"

"*sigh* Just when you thought we could go ONE NIGHT without anything chaotic…" FF2 sighed, then took out his wand. "Oh well. SUCK MAGIC, YOU FREAKS!"

All the Authors attacked the Kego Slash Fans- Tracker shot at them, Sailor Androm3da used his powers on them, Colin whipped out several KND devices to throttle them, FF2 used his magic to turn some of them into ferrets and stuff them down another's pants, and Fanatic went crazy with his chain-guns. It was complete insanity!

Mickey had the rest of the guests evacuate, knowing things weren't going to get pretty. "Sheesh, I've never seen them this violent since the Bronies attacked!" Max commented as he and the rest of the staff watched from backstage… yelping when a Kego Fan hit the wall next to them.

"Well, you know how fans are- they're always getting into wars like this over specific things," Daisy replied. "Pairings, criticisms, sequels, who made the best OC, fan-art… heck, someone's probably in a flame-war with someone on the message-boards about this story now!"

"How do you know all this?" Minnie asked.

"Forums, chat-rooms, comments, reviews… Clarabelle goes through it all,"

"And you wouldn't BELIEVE the language they use!" Clarabelle added, giving a shiver.

"TAKE THIS! AND THAT! AND SOME OF THIS! AND A BIT OF THAT!" Colin was shouting, using a S.P.A.N.K.E.R on a Kego Fan.

"OH YEAH?! HAVE SOME YOURSELF!" said Kego Fan, as they took out a can of Mace, spraying it in his eyes.

Colin screamed, running around in circles. "ME EYES! ME EYES!" he grabbed a random bucket of water, tearing out his eyeballs and dunking them in it, then putting them back in the sockets. "Ah… that's better…" he took out a Super-Soaker filled with acid. "Now then, WHO WANTS TO DIE?!"

"Boy, these guys will do anything to protect their ideas, won't they?" Drakken asked as he, Shego, Dementor, Ron, Kim, and Rufus watched the havoc from the safety of the VIP section.

"To tell the truth, I thought the only thing these weirdoes were good at were drawing fan-arts and writing fics," Shego responded.

Kim contacted Wade, to get some help on the situation. "Hey, Kim. What's the sitch?" he asked.

Kim rolled her eyes. "First of all, that's my line. Second, we need help here. Those Kego Slash Fans followed us to the club, and they're tearing it apart all because Ron proposed to me,"

"He did? Way to go, Ron! It's about time! Did she say yes?"

"Yes, that's when the crazies attacked," Ron replied, then paused. "Er… the OTHER crazies, I mean."

"Do you have any ideas on how we can stop them?" Kim asked Wade.

"Are there any KimxRon fans there to back you up?" Wade asked, typing at his computer.

"Yeah, they're in a war with them now," Ron said…

*KABOOM!*

"OW! YOU FLIPPING CHEATER!" Sailor shouted.

"…and, um, nothing's getting solved." Ron finished.

"Well, there's two solutions," Wade replied, looking at his computer screen. "First, use neutral reasoning, convince them they have the liberty to express their ideas, but should allow the characters to do what they want and not interfere with their lives. …If that doesn't work, there's a person you can contact to get rid of them. They're called 'The Slash-Fan Slasher'- rumor has it they eradicated an entire slash fan-base and those guys were never heard from again,"

"We'll go find this 'Slash Fan Slasher' then… Chances are, those lunatics down there won't agree to neutral reasoning," Shego commented.

"Yeah, and the Kego Fans won't either." Dementor added.

"We'll try to reason with them, then." Kim replied.

"The Slash-Fan Slasher should be located in Brooklyn," Wade informed the villains. "Wait… why are you guys helping?"

"Because, as much as I HATE Kim Possible, there's one thing we can agree on- those slash fans of ours have got to go!" Shego replied, as she, Drakken, and Dementor left.

"HEY, THAT'S ANOTHER THING THAT COULD MAKE THEM CLICK!" A Kego Fan shouted… then got shot. "OW! MY SPLEEN!" they then shot back.

"OW! WHY YOU ROTTEN…!" Tracker snarled, then went Chuck Norris on them, round-house kicking one of them clear to Jupiter!

*CRASH!*

"Ow… dang, what a kick!" The Kego Fan said after landing on the planet, then looked up and saw Sentinel Prime sitting there. "Oh, hai! I'm a big fan of yours!"

"GOOD GRIEF! CAN I GET NO PRIVACY?!" Sentinel shouted, then shot off to find a different planet to hide out on.

Anyway, back on earth, Kim decided it was time to put the chaos on a hiatus, before someone died. "ALRIGHT, EVERYBODY CALM DOWN!" she shouted, then turned to the Kego fans. "I think it's time we talked this over,"

"Well thanks for putting our fun to a grinding frickin' halt!" Colin huffed, pocketing a grenade… which blew up, making his pocket expand and shrink back down, smoke billowing out.

"Did you finally come to your senses on who your heart REALLY belongs to?" a Kego fan asked, hopefully.

"Um, no. That's actually what I need to talk to you guys about." Kim told them. "Guys, I'm in love with Ron, and it took me years to realize it for myself. You guys can draw your pictures, write your slash-fics, and whatever the heck you want, but it won't make me change my mind. Just because it looks or sounds 'sexy' doesn't mean it's a perfect pairing- it just sounds wrong. Shego and I will always be mortal enemies, and nothing else."

"Are you sure?" another Kego fan asked, sadly.

"Positive. Not that I want to trash your ideas… but I just can't see it happening. Can you guys deal with that?"

The Kego fans looked at one another. "Well… I suppose we could," one of them sighed.

"But… We don't want to! And if you and these authors are going to bash our idea, then GET READY FOR A WORLD OF PAIN!" The leader of the Kego fans shouted, and they took out a whole arsenal of weapons!

"And I call dibs on THIS one..." a specific Kego fan said, their eyes glowing red as they clenched their robotic fists... wait, robotic fists?!

"Hold it... HATER?!" Fanatic gasped. "I didn't know you were a Slash Fan!"

"I'm not. I just came undercover to throttle you again," Hater then lunged, him and Fanatic getting into a brawl.

"Well, so much for neutral reasoning," Ron muttered, holding on to Kim.

The head Kego Fan aimed a plasma-cannon at them. "READY! AIM! FI-"

*CRASH!*

*beep beep!*

A red car crashed through the wall, adjacent to the one the purple van crashed through in the last chapter, running over the Kego fans as it did. "Seriously, people! We have a VALET!" Donald shouted, pointing at Max.

"Who's on break… forever!" Max gulped.

Out of the backseat of the car climbed out Shego, Drakken, and Dementor. "Where ze heck did you learn to drive, you crazy hoodlum?!" Dementor demanded, stumbling around, dizzily.

"A better reason… why did we drive, rather than take our cruiser?" Shego inquired.

"We did… but halfway down the street it ran out of gas, and when we walked out, THIS maniac ran us over, grabbed us, and threw us in the backseat!" Drakken snarled, pointing at the driver.

The driver's door opened, and WG climbed out. "I said I was sorry, didn't I?" she scoffed.

"WHEREVER GIRL, thank GOODNESS!" Fanatic exclaimed. "We've got a slash fan situation here!"

"And we're going to need that Slash Fan Slasher here, NOW!" Ron cried out.

"Well, we would have found them by now if THIS psychotic little boy didn't play Hit-and-Kidnap!" Drakken snarled.

"First of all, I'M A GIRL!" WG snapped at Drakken. "Second, you don't NEED to find the Slash Fan Slasher!"

"Why not?" Tracker asked. There was whimpering, and they looked over, seeing that the Kego Fans were huddled together in fear.

WG took out a large battle-axe, grinning maliciously. "Because… _I'm already here_ ," she looked at Kim and Shego. "Mind backing me up, ladies?"

Shego's fists glowed as she grinned as well. "It would be my pleasure," she replied.

Kim pulled off her dress, revealing her mech-suit from _So The Drama._ "Lets do this," she agreed.

WG, Shego, and Kim then lunged at the Kego Slash Fans.

"OH SUGAR HONEY ICED TEA!" They all shouted, taking out their weapons and preparing to-

Too late. The three women got to them first.

It was a brutal affair- so bloody and violent, with limbs breaking and blood splattering and skulls getting crushed as vital organs were ripped out, that if we went into further detail chances are the reader would be scarred for life!

Oh, and Fanatic kicked Hater's butt, too... like literately. He kicked him in the rear so hard, it telescoped up to his head. Hater growled, preparing to attack...

*FWISH!*

Ice covered him just then, freezing him solid. "Thank you, Elsa!" Fanatic called to the Ice Queen from Frozen... Hey, I promised a cameo, didn't I?

"You're welcome," Elsa replied. "Anyone who works in league with slash fans deserves it,"

Fanatic then kicked the Iced Hater so hard, he slid out of the club and down the street into the distance, never to be seen... until another chapter. "Serves him right for interfering too early,"

"EVACUATE! MISSION ABORTED! MISSION ABORTED!" a Kego fan screamed, and they all piled into their van.

"AND TELL THE REST OF THE INCREDBLY ANNOYING LEAGUE OF SLASH FANS TO LEAVE OUR FAVORITE CHARACTERS ALONE, OR THERE'LL BE MORE WHERE THAT CAME FROM!" WG shouted at them, waving her bloodied axe.

"And thank you for making us deaf again," Shego sneered, rubbing her ear.

"Whoa, WG… I-I had no idea you were the Slash Fan Slasher!" Sailor gasped.

"Well, I only go after the total jerks, like the IALSF." WG explained. "Like those morons who only draw and write fics for the sake of causing fangasms, and demoralizing the characters and such and such. Like if someone writes a fic, just because they think the pairing would be nice, hey that's their freedom of choice- but if they write it just to make the characters smutty, let alone turn tender moments into something naughty, that's when I lose it and impale them. …Just ask Fangface and Puggsy,"

Tracker's eyes widened. "They have slash-fans?!" she gasped.

WG smirked, wickedly. "Not anymore."

"Can we hire you?" Dib asked as he and Zim walked up.

"Well, now that THAT moment of chaos is done with… on to the wedding plans!" Fanatic exclaimed. "Don't worry, Ron and Kim- we've got ideas to make it the best ceremony ever cre…"

He paused, seeing Kim and Ron were gone, a trail of smoke left behind.

"…What did I say?"

WG shook her head. "Nothing, Fan. Lets just wrap up the chapter, and prepare for the big day," she said as they walked out. "And with us around, I'm sure nothing will go wrong…"

"It will," Plot said, walking by.

The two authors exchanged glances, shrugged, then walked off.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

**A/N: And there's Part Three!**

***Note: apologies to any Kego fans who found this offensive.**

**Please review. No flames, otherwise you'll suffer the same fate as the Slash Fans.**


	25. Minisode: A Party at the House of Mouse!

**Before we go on to Part Four, here is a mini-episode... And it's a Song Chapter! :D You know what that means?!**

**Fanatic: Extreme evacuation is amust?**

**Darn right! RUN!**

**Disclaimer: We don't own any characters, just ourselves; and we don't own the original song, 'There's A Party in Agrabah' of which we are parodying (be afraid, be very afraid).**

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

We open to the front of the House of Mouse, and before the reader even has time to blink, the song begins! Yeah, rush-job, but DEAL WITH IT!

 **WG:** _(pops up in front of reader, giving them a heart attack)_ ~There's a party at the House of Mouse

There's excitement in the air!

Everyones coming from near and far

'Cause Kim and Ron are finally gonna tie the knot!~

 **Fanatic:** _(Pops up next to WG, pulling her aside) ~_ There's a party here at the House of Mouse

Every toon will be there!

So if you're an Author or a Reader

Time to prep it up!~

 **Tracker:** _(puts tuxedo on Fanatic)_ ~You mustn't wear an outfit that's ragged

A ripped up shirt just won't do~

 **FF2:** _(throws a tuxedo on WG as well)_ ~No jeans with holes or blood stains

We've got to bring out the best in you!~

~Scene Change to the Authors Entering the Club, where Colin and Sailor Andromeda are decorating~

 **Colin:** _(putting up streamers)_ ~There's a party here at the House of Mouse

And we're going to make the place awesome!~

 **Androm3da:** ( _randomly throwing decorative mints and confetti on all the tables... and sprinkling some on Donald)_ ~If you want to see us trash the place

Don't worry- the time will come!~

 **Fanatic:** ~Kim and Ron are getting married, and it's about time too

It'll be an event to remember forever~

 **WG:** ~So if you want to see, well come and see!

See all the things we're gonna do!~

 **FF2 (with Colin and Sailor in background):** ~You've seen us handling action!

(Augh!)

And a bit of humor too

(Ha ha!)~

 **Tracker:** ~Well none of them compare to this big hit

The food will be sweet, the dance floor will be dented!~

 **All the Authors:** ~There's a party here at the House of Mouse

And it's going to be one heck of a show!

If a goof-up could've made this step

So can some Authors, just feast your eyes and watch! _(unleash weapons, but when they pull the triggers, decorations explode out)_

And now we'll take you to the stage!

Where the celebration will take place

Without any Slash Fans or Hater Drones around

WHAT COULD POSSIBLY GO WRONG?!

Oh there's a party at the HOUSE OF MOUSE!~

The song took a pause... while on the stage, Mickey gave the authors a confused look. "Um, guys? You know the wedding isn't until NEXT WEEK, right?" he asked.

"DON'T CARE!" WG exclaimed.

**All the Authors:** _(with full emotion) ~THERE'S A PARTY AT THE HOUSE OF MOUSE!~_

_(end song)_

"Oh, brother..." Donald groaned, face-palming.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

**A/N: Yeah, I know I cut out a chunk of the song, but no worries- the wedding shall be epic!**

**Please review... for those of you who didn't die from reading the bad lyrics and hearing me sing. ...As for the flamers, YOU HAD IT COMING!**


	26. The Wedding We've All Been Waiting For! (End!)

**And now... THE FINALE AT LONG LAST!**

**Disclaimer: We've been saying it all season, we're skipping it now! TO THE WEDDING!**

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

It was a typical night at the House of Mouse- by that we mean things were starting off in their typical filler-esque demeanor before the plot would arrive and things would spiral into calamity and mayhem, just for the sake of entertainment for the viewers.

Colin looked up at the sentence. "What the heck was that all about?" he asked.

"WG has been watching a lot of The Big Bang Theory, and since then has been acting more like a nerd," FF2 replied.

"You mean she wasn't nerdy enough already?" Sailor Androm3da asked. "I mean, she's on Fanfiction AND Deviantart..."

"Guys, we're ALL on Fanfiction- I believe we're ALL nerds," Tracker noted.

"...and slowly, the population is increasing, and the stereotypical jocks shall be outnumbered by a vast accountance of those on a more intellectual level, and then THEY shall be the ones begging for mercy in the college dorms!" FF2 said with a sinister smirk.

Everyone gave him a 'what the heck?' look, but decided not to question anything. "SO... Where exactly are WG and Fan?" Colin asked.

"AAAAAUUUGGGGH!" came a scream, and a random person came running down the street... while on fire and his pants missing.

"They're here." Tracker sighed.

Sure enough, Fanatic and WG came walking down the sidewalk, looking quite accomplished. "And THAT'S what happens to the jerks who spam me," WG informed Fanatic.

"Very well demonstrated. Can you do the same to that hacker who tried to steal my identity on DA?" Fanatic asked.

"Sure! I'll have FF2 hack his system,"

"Hold it... what was THAT all about?" Sailor Androm3da asked.

"Oh, some guy spammed WG on her DA account, so she had FF2 hack his system- they tracked down his address before making his computer blue-screen, then WG hunted him down and we had a frank exchange of ideas," Fanatic explained.

FF2 arched an eyebrow. "I didn't track down his address..." he said.

Fanatic thought about it. "Oh yeah, I had Soundwave do it!"

"And he'll be getting several cases of Energon in return for his favor," WG added with a grin.

"Okay..." Tracker said, awkwardly.

Plot then came up. "Hey, guys, is the filler done yet? I have a dentist appointment so we really need to speed things along," he said.

"Oh, yeah. Hold on. FILLER!" FF2 shouted.

Another guy, wearing a T-shirt that read 'Filler', stood leaning against the wall, playing videogames. "I'm outta here," he said, getting the message.

"There we go." Colin said, then paused. "So... what's the plot again?"

"Oh, it's where we celebrate Kim and Ron's wedding," Fanatic replied.

"Oh yeah."

Pause.

"KIM AND RON'S WEDDING?!" All the Authors shouted, suddenly remembering the wedding was today!

"Oh crap, it starts in five minutes!" FF2 gasped.

"Quick! Immediate wardrobe-and-scene change!" WG declared.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

One Wardrobe-And-Scene Change Later...

The Security Authors now stood in the dining pavillion. The guys were wearing black tuxedos with different ties- FF2's was red and yellow (like the Gryffindor house), Sailor's had the Sailor Moon logo on it, Colin's had the KND logo, and Fanatic had a red tie, his jacket open and he was wearing a cap. Black Sweatpants were worn though, he HATES nice dress pants "Going with the Nostalgia Critic look?" WG asked.

"Well, I couldn't decide between my Transformers cummerbund or the Calvin and Hobbes tie, so I decided to just wing it," Fanatic replied with a shrug. "By the way, I have a question."

"Ask away."

"Is the apocalypse upon us?"

"No, why?"

"Because... you're wearing a dress."

It was true. Tracker and WG were wearing dresses- Tracker's was a dark-blue gown with a matching shawl, and she wore a diamond necklace with a moon-shaped charm. WG wore a red-and-white dipped dress, with a cross-necklace with a ruby in the middle. "Well, Mickey said it was a formal affair... and I didn't know whether he was serious or was just saying that so we wouldn't show up. Either way, I dressed for the occasion,"

"WG has specific standards- she'll only wear a dress for weddings... or to give people panic-attacks and land them in a state of hysteria." Tracker replied.

"Or when someone write me into one!" WG said, slapping Fan on the back of the head.

"OW, that was episode 5 LET IT GO WOMAN!" The younger author yelled.

Mickey walked by, pausing when he saw the authors. "Oh... you guys dressed for the occasion." He said, a bit stunned.

"Crud, the apocalypse is starting!" Max joked.

"What, were you expecting us to show up in combat boots and machine guns?" FF2 asked.

"Well... yes." Mickey admitted.

"Well, you won't be disappointed!" WG lifted the skirt of her dress, showing she was wearing jeans underneath, with combat boots, and also pulled out a machine gun. "Dresses, though stylish and uncomfortable, can be handy in hiding weapons."

Mickey's eyes twitched, and he face-palmed. "I spoke too soon..."

"Places, everybody! The ceremony is about to begin!" Minnie called.

"This is going to be the best double-wedding ever!" Sailor exclaimed as they went to sit down.

Mickey paused. "DOUBLE wedding?! Who's the other couple?!"

Suddenly, Tiger (Fanatic's cat) and TC (WG's cat) came walking down the aisle, dressed as a bride and groom.

"Didn't we tell you? We're going to be in-laws!" WG said to Mickey.

Everyone took their seats. Ron stood on the stage by a preacher, with Wade next to him as the best-man (the second time he ever saw him in person!), and Rufus on his shoulder, as his best mole-rat. Monique stood across from them, having been chosen as Kim's maid of honor.

Everyone rised as Dr. James Timothy Possible walked down the aisle, Kim linked to his arm. They stopped at the end of the aisle and Kim walked up onto the stage, standing next to Ron, while her father sat down with her mother, Dr. Ann Possible, both parents wiping tears, so happy to see their daughter getting married. Tim and Jim (the 'tweebs') sat next to them, cheering on their older sister until their mother shushed them.

"Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to join in the holy matrimony of Kimberly Possible, and Ronald Stoppable..." the preacher began.

"Meow!" Tiger snapped.

"Oh, and um... Tiger97 and TC Wherever..."

One long ceremony later...

"...I now pronounce you husband and wife- and cat and, uh, cat. You may kiss the brides,"

Kim and Ron kissed, Kim showing more passion and nearly knocking Ron over until he steadied himself, and the crowd cheered, while TC and Tiger rubbed noses. "I'm so frickin' happy!" Fanatic cried, dabbing his eyes with a tissue, then blowing his nose on it making a foghorn sound.

Kim and Ron walked back down the aisle, everyone congratulating them, and the family went out to take pictures for the event while the staff redecorated the room for the reception. FF2 and Sailor carried a stack of chairs, placing them in storage... not knowing Colin was on one at the top!

"zzzz...Huh? Is it over?" Colin asked, snapping awake.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

At the reception, everyone mingled. "I can't believe this actually happened..." WG said.

"That Kim and Ron finally tied the knot?" Fanatic asked.

"No, that we went through an entire ceremony without a single mishap... maybe it IS the apocalypse!"

"Maybe... Oh, look, they're about to have their first dance!"

Kim and Ron walked out to the dance-floor. Horace was in charge of being the DJ, and was about to play a romantic song... but was yanked off-screen by Motor Ed. "And now, I shall serenade Kim and Ron's first dance!" he announced.

"Oh no." said Drakken putting his head in his hands

"Dr. D," Shego began, ",is he THAT bad of a singer?"

"Well, my Aunt/his mother said he had the voice of an angel."

"Oh, well then that's no-"

"Shego she was mostly deaf."

"oh…."

At that point, Motor Ed, cleared his throat and then...pulled out a chainsaw guitar and belted out-

-ENGINE BLOCK!

I WANT YOU TO BE AN ENGINE BLOCK!

WHERE ARE YOU STUPID ENGINE BLOCK?

TRY HARDER TO BE AN ENGINE BLOCK!-

*BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZT!*

Tracker took out a taser-gun and zapped him into a state of unconsciousness, then dragged him out. "Sorry about that!" she called.

Fanatic turned to WG. "You were saying?" he asked.

Horace got back in the DJ stand and played "Remember When" by Alan Jackson, and Kim and Ron started their official dance. "About time, huh?" Kim asked, smiling at her husband.

"Yeah... Six years and here we are at last," Ron replied. "And for the first time, everything in my life is going right..."

Right at that moment, a loud howling was heard, coming from the rafters as a giant dog transformer dropped down from the ceiling, looking like a large wold, black colored with machine guns on it's back and claws that were as long as Fanatic *Telling you that this is ONE BIG PUPPY*.

"...*sigh*, spoke too soon." Ron finished

It snarled as it looked at it's surroundings, letting out a low growl when it laid optics on Fanatic.

"Ummmmmmm Fanatic?" WG asked, pointing. "Who's that?"

"Shuck." Fanatic said, barely audible as he tore off his clothing revealing his regular outfit under it.

Right then Another bot, dropped down from the shadows, this one tall and lanky, clarey with a Motorcycle for an Alternate mode, a face resembling a skull, wearing a black robe/cloak with a scythe on his back.

"Well," He said with a grin. "look at who the cat dragged in." He said, a grin forming.

"Mew?" Tiger asked.

"Not you." Fanatic said gruffly  
Fanatic stepped forward. "Alright boys, give me a very good reason as to why I shouldn't blow you both to kingdom come!" He said, reaching for his Star Saber sword.

"Okay, who are these guys?" Monique asked, pointing toward the two robots. "Because they are the strangest Wedding crashers I have ever seen."

"I have seen weirder, like that one guy made outta lava from my brothers Wedding, I blasted him with enough water to flood the ark!

FF2 looked at the two, and blinked. "Is that a robotic Black Shuck?" He asked.

Mors laughed. "Of course he is, he's not called Shuck for a reason!" He bent down and scratched the robot dogs ear, who's growls softened a little bit.

"I will ask again, WHY ARE YOU HERE!?" Fanatic roared, in all caps.

Mors tisked. "My you're a feisty one tonight," He chuckled as he gently tossed something into the air, and it activated shining with a bright blue light, a hologram appeared of a large head, a mix between a transformer called Big Convoy, and a crown, a faceplate over his mouth, and blazing red optics.

Everyone stared at the head in confusion, except for Fanatic, who looked like he was going to kill someone.

"Greetings House of Mouse Patrons." the voice spoke. "My name is Tempus, you may have heard of me and/or Fanatic has mentioned me a few times, I would very much like to be there right now, but sadly I have other duties to attend to at this time."

"What duty's would a giant robot have?" Colin asked openly.

"None of your business duties." Tempus said, looking at Fanatic. "It's not a pleasure to see you still alive boy, " he said, his voice growing grave. "I so wish that you would have just died and then you would have spared these toons my ultimatums."

Fanatic snorted. "You would have done it anyway if I was dead or not!" He hissed. " Your little I was just going to do this if this thing happened does bull**** to me, and you **** well know it!"

"WOAH, Fanatic language!" Tracker shouted. "I just missed censoring those!"

Tempus laughed. "If this is all that stands in my way, I wouldn't have done so much planning, oh well, I will leave you know to deal with your unwanted guests, I-"

BLAM

Before he could finish, Fanatic had cut him off by blasting the hologram device to scrap metal he growled, and looked at Mors and Shuck, fire in his eyes. Mors laughed.

"You heard him boy unwanted guests, you ought to deal with them."

"We're about to!" Tracker said, the other Authors appearing around Fanatic, right as the stage exploded.

"WOAH!" Mickey shouted as he dove from the blast.

"Oh what is it now?" Kim asked, crossing her arms

"I think you mean who." Wade said-"

" IS HERE! :D" WG and FF2 shouted happily.

"Oh please tell me it's the 10th Doctor." FF2 shouted happily.

RIght then, Hater appeared from the hole, the Golden Falcon and Gaston with him, behind them were roughly, oh 30-50 Hater Drones. "I hate to burst your bubble, but I enjoy doing that, now normally a villain would make a long boring speech but ya know what...Attack." he said simply.

Right then, a loud cry was heard as Hater drones leapt over the three villains and Gaston and the Falcon charged forward, weapons blazing like crazed monkeys that were drunk while wielding chainguns.

The Authors stared at the sight while the Wedding guests stepped back, at that one Fanatic pulled out his Star Saber. 'GAME ON!" he shouted and raced forward yelling, as he jumped into the air, and meet the drones head on.

WG took FF2's hand. "Shall we." She asked in a suave british accent.

"Of course my dear." FF2 said, and they both tore off their nice clothes, as did Tracker, Colin and Sailor and raced head on toward the villains.

"Wait, what are WE supposed to do?" Kim asked suddenly looking at the battle beginning. "I mean I thought this chapter was called Kim and Ron's Wedding! " she said. "I mean I wouldn't mind but you make it be like to seem it's about and then you, GAH!" She said, as Ron grabbed her hand and squeezed.

"honestly, KP, I don't think we want to be in that fight." Ron said, watching as WG slammed a Hater drone's head into the ground and it exploded energon spreading everywhere.

Inside the Fight the Authors were finding themselves pitted against Hater Drones that were very much improved,actually competent and it took a LOT of effort to take one down even when beheaded, Fanatic had sliced one in half and it came back, hopping around and shooting at them, until Tracker blew it up with a Rocket launcher. It seemed that slicing and dicing HAter Drones was futile considering that they wouldn't go down unless totally destroyed .

As WG, stabbed another through the head, she felt an arm wrap around her neck.

"No one takes revenge like Gaston!" Guess who, said as he aimed his gun at her head, but WG, snapped around and socked him in the face, and kicked him in said face, Gaston tumbled back into Tracker who whirled around and shot him in the chest. The bullet pinged off and Gaston smirked, right as the Taser gun's dart entered his forehead, and shocked him into submission, or it would have if Hater hadn't had Tempus give him an upgrade, he ripped it from her hands and grabbing the dart, swung it around, striking her in the head, Tracker grunted and she kicked him in the chest, he stumbled and she continued her assault, until Gaston upper cut her, sending her sailing backwards. Gaston let out a laugh.

"No one-"

"SHUT UP!" Colin and Sailor yelled in all caps and hit him over the head with an anvil.

'MaKeS COOkiES with GRAndMA like GASheaaaaaaddddddddd…." Gaston said as he fell over.

"WOO!" Sailor shouted and raised his arm to Colin. 'High five! " Colin high fived him, forgetting that they were holding an anvil, that crashed down onto their feet.

Both Authors stared at each other and then began screaming.

Right then, WG poked her head in. "Where on earth did you guys get that anvil?"

Both Authors pointed to where one could see the Warner's were chucking the things at high velocity onto Hater drones.

"You could just say that they were tossing them around." Colin said, and then did the drum thing.

'Oy, I know the toonverse has bad puns but that was just AWFUL."

"Well what do you expect, she's writing." COlin said, as WG slapped him. "OW"

*SLAP*

"WHAT IS IT WITH WOMEN HERE AND SLAPPING ME!?"

Anyway onto another portion of the battle.

SHuck roared as he jumped onto FF2, who was zapping drones with his Sonic Screwdriver, and was tackled to the ground.

he looked up at SHuck, who lowered his face and growled.

"Hey now, no need to get antsy here, uh, you wanna be an official character?, I own Disney, does doggy wanna be an official character?" He said in a babying voice.

SLASH!

FF2 felt the deep bleeding wounds on his face. 'Clearly you do not cause you just crossed the line!"

Suddenly he became a whirling tornado until his werewolf form, Sliver appeared and he threw Shuck off of him.

Silver growled and charged for the giant dog bot, but SHuck beat him to the punch firing his machine guns mounted on his back at the werewolf, a few shots hit and went into Sliver, but the Werewolf jumped as Shuck swatted him to the floor, and swiped at him with his claws. SIlver dodged and grabbed onto his arm and bit into it...finding out that teeth + Titanium alloy = pain.

Silver whimpered and held his mouth as Shuck raised an amr, ready for the kill, when he heard a whistle he looked right as Tracker, werewolf form, hit him dead on in the side, both went tumbling with Shock on his back, and Tracker on top.

"My your rambunctious, i think you need to be put down..or fixed, whichever causes more pain...wow I'm dark today !" She said an evil glint in her eye. Shuck blanched and growled opening his mouth and emitting a sonic howl, that threw her off him. Tracker slammed into the opposing wall and moaned.

"Why did Fanatic have to make them uber powerful why!?"

RIght then, Sliver attacked SHuck, along with Stalker stunning him as their claws raked across his body, and at one point stalker slashed his left optic. The Were dg...robot, howled and threw both off of him and charged.

The Two werewolves looked up at the charging beast. "Scatter!" Silver shouted, right then a smaller werewolf appeared.

'You called?" It asked.

Both Stalker and Silver stared at the small werewolf. "Where did you come from?" Sliver asked.

Scatter shrugged. "By product of scientists stealing some of Fangapuss's DNA and giving it to a midget.

"How does that even work?" Stalker said, when she looked up. "Wuh oh."

"What?" Sliver asked, then looked, "HOLY COW!" They shouted and dove to the side.

"What, what's the-"

Scatter never finished as Shuck's foot came down and crushed the dude. at that point he tore after Stalker.

"...Ow." muttered Scatter.

Shuck roared and charged towards Tracker who had just gotten down from the wall, when she leapt into the air and jumped on his neck, digging her claws him and slashing about, Shuck howled in pain, snarling he tried to throw her off, as Silver and Stalker both attacked, clawing at him once more, this time doing him some severe damage Stalker even climbed up and tore off one of his Machine guns and fired into his back.

Shuck roared,and trembled , going to his knees as the werewolves continued their onslaught.

Sliver, was about to bite down on some wire, when suddenly he heard an engine roar, he looked just in time, for a tire to impact into his face, and run him over, knocking the other two werewolves off the injured Shuck.

Mors turned around and ran over Sliver again, who grabbed him, and swung him around, throwing him into the air, Mors transformed and drew his scythe and leapt off the wall, slamming it down and slicing upward which FF2 only just avoided.

Mors laughed eagerly. "Winning a battle doesn't mean you've won the war!"

He slashes around, striking Sliver in the chest, and then slashing down, causing a deep crack in the floor.

Stalker, pulled out a machete that slashed across his face, Mors growled and swatted her aside, right as a bolt of electricity struck him from the side. He whirled to see Tracker, blasting away with her electricity based powers.

Mors grumbled as she leapt up and slashed his face, and then sliced down his chest, energon poured out and Tracker landed.

"Chew on that one Mr. Skullhead!"

"You, just signed your death wish!" Mors said, venom in his voice as he charged toward the three werewolves again. Right before he reached however, there was a loud yelling and everyone stopped, right as Road Hazard exploded through the wall, transforming and tackling Mors to the ground, and throwing him into the wall.

Then, an artillery truck, raced through the hole and began firing on the Hater drones, followed by a Gold and Blue Cybertronian Plane.

"Somebody call for us?" Wardog asked as he transformed into Robot mode, weapons armed and ready.

Fanatic smirked. "You guys always show up late!"

Road Hazard grinned. "Hey it's dramatic."

"Enough talking!" Skyrim snapped coldly. "Let's get this over with!"

From there, Darkwing Duck, launched from SkyRim's cockpit *giggidy*

The three Autobots and Darkwing charged forward, attacking Mors, and a cortiendent of Hater Drones, all at once. With this added help the Authors knew that the battle was theirs.

THE END

…...Nah Just kidding we wouldn't do that to you guys

When all had been said and done, the Club was a wreck, bodies lay everywhere, Energon was spilled all over the place, with some spilled blood mixed in here and there.

The Golden Falcon lay twisted into a pretzel, Gaston was buried under some anvils, Mors groaned where he lay, his machete stuck through the lower portion of his chest, and shuck was hog tied to the rafters.

"Well," WG said, looking around. 'That was invigorating."

Skyrim chuckled, as he stood watching the sparks fizzle from the dead and/or dying drones. 'Gotta admit, working with you guys is awesome."

Soon Mickey and the Wedding Patrons came in, Mickey;'s eyes bulged out.

"What in the name of Disney….." he whimpered,seeing the wrecked condition.

"Wow, reminds me of the time you and Rufus went to that all you can eat buffet." Kim said, looking at her husband with a sly smirk. Ron chuckled dryly and rubbed the back of his neck. "Yeah but actually I think there was less destruction."

anatic looked at the others. 'We are so fired."

'Oh yeah." The others responded.

Sailor looked at Fanatic. 'Hey, what happened to Hater, I mean I know we had that big offscreen thing but was he among the drones?"

Everyone turned to Fanatic, who blinked.

"I think we have a Season 2 hook." Was all he said.

"No, no you do not." Hater said, coming behind Fanatic and blasting him with a laser. Fanatic lew forward, yelling as he hit the wall. Hater jumped up and turned both arms into Chainsaws, but Fanatic spun away as his chainsaws went through the wall.

Fanatic got up and double kicked his doppelganger in the back, with a crash Hater, went into the Kitchen.

Hater spun around and fired his weapons at Fan, who blocked with his Star Saber and swung around, releasing a massive burst of Energy.

Hater flew into the opposing wall, and dug his hands into it as Fan jumped up and kicked him in the head, sparks flew and metal tore as Fan landed and punched him in the face.

Outside, everyone else watched the fight going on, and Mr. Possible looked at the Authors.

"Well, aren't you going to help him?' he asked, gesturing as Hater began whacking Fan with a pot.

"Are you kidding me?" Tracked asked him. "We may be crazy but none of us are suicidal, when he fights Hater, it's best to let them have at it."

"Besides, it's great payback for him not helping me originally in the baby Shelby Chapter." WG huffed, crossing her arms. 'Easy girl, don't go into your grudges now, you've been clean most of this fic…" FF2 said, putting his right arm around his girlfriend.

Colin looked at the fight. "Looks like they are really going at it this time."

Inside the Kitchen, Fanatic jumped onto a stone and landed on hater's shoulders, placing his legs on them, and then grabbing his hair, he snapped his neck around, sparks flying due to the severity of it.

Hater, threw him off and charged his arm, morphing into a blade. As he brought it down, Fan blocked it with his Star Saber, they pressed blades until hater pulled back and Fan, grabbed and flipped him into countertop, energon exploded from his now shattered nose,and Fan held him up and shoved his Star Saber right through his chest.

"Who's the weak one now?" Fanatic taunted, pulling it out, and then slicing Hater in the side, followed by jamming it right there. ",and that, was for stabbing ME in the side."

Hater's knees buckled. "I'm impressed boy, you fought better than expected." He tore the blade out and tossed it aside.

He had five seconds before Fanatic shot him in the face with a laser gun, that blasted him back.

"Yeah I'm a bit tired of the cliches at the moment, not in the mood!" Fan said, as he pulled out two strange looking devices, a pair of gauntlets that he slid on his hands and he made a swinging motion, and a massive Shockwave went flying out, that sent Hater, sprawling into the nearby wall.

Wade gaped. "He has Gauntlet's that create Shockwaves!"

He looked up at Kim, who stared back confused. "umm wade…"

Wade grabbed her arm. 'Let me make you some shockwave gauntlet's!, PLEASE!" He said, gaining Bambi eyes in the process.

Tracker chuckled while FF2 mumbled to himself, 'mental note, Get Fanatic to make a pair of those for WG as a Birthday present."

Hater struggled to get up, as Fan pulled out a Cybertronian knife like Blade and slashed across his face. He then picked him up and threw him into a rack of pans, pots and assorted utensils, that fell onto him.

"Someone's been playing a little too much Fall of Cybertron." He said, energon dribbling from his mouth.

Fanatic grabbed him, and held him to his face, both staring each other down, Hater cokec his head to the side. "Well, aren't you going to kill me again, do it in a dramatic fashion that will astound readers and make you look like some big D*amn hero?"

Fanatic looked him over, and a smirk appeared on his face. "nope."

He reached back and opened the Club's walk in freezer and threw Hater in there, where he impacted with the inner wall, Fanatic slammed the door shut as hard as he could and then looked at the settings.

-Cold

-Freezing

-Below Zero

-Ice Age

-Frozen movie levels

-Frooze for over 1,000 years.

-Just how long do you want this preserved?

-Seriously, any colder and they will not come out until another five centuries.

-What are you trying to do, show future archaeologists the kind of food that we have?

-I am pretty sure they will still have food dude!

-Alright then, whatever, just don't expect to eating this stuff any time soon!

Fanatic set it to the final setting, and then twisted it further until it had rotated a full 360, and then he hit the speed of freeze dial.

-Fast.

-Faster than fast.

-Speed of Light

-Sonic the Hedgehog times 1,000

Hater began yelling and clawing at the door. His shouts muffled *Thank God* by the steel, until his scream began dying down and he began punching the door, causing severe dents until at last the noise died down, and Fanatic opened the door, revealing Hater, covered in ice and froze solid.

Fanatic then shut the door, locked it, and then placed on it, "Do not Open till Season 2" and then walked back toward the others.

"Alright we can change scenes now."

"Finally!' Wg said. "Critc!"

"yeah?" The Nostalgia Crtic said, walking up.

"Do your scene Transitions from your inspector gadget review!"

"On it!"

ooooooooo*One scene Transition later*ooooooooooooo

**_"The club had been hastily repaired by the Authors and the staff patrons until there was no evidence that a battle had taken place there, and the Wedding reception continued on as planned…"_ **

(Kim and Ron kiss, during their first dance, and as they break apart, Colin puts on some blaring Techno Music and the dance floor is filled with people dancing)

**_"And though they faced many hardships, the Authors had proved themselves time and time again that they could handle all the was thrown at them."_ **

(Cuts to Fanatic, Sailor, and Tracker playing a Card game with Drakken, Monkey Fist, Adrena Lynn, Gemini, Dr. Director, and the right Arm of a Harter droid. The others sadly fold their cards, and the Hater arm reveals a royal flush)

("How are we losing to an ARM!?" Gemini asked angrily.)

**_"And though things didn't go as exactly planned, it can be rest assured that while they are crazy, the Authors know how to get the job done."_ **

(It cuts to Kim throwing to bouquet, and it lands in Calvin's hands who freaks out and faints)

**_"And in the end, they managed to defeat the machinations of Tempus,"_ **

(Cut to Mors, Shuck, the Falcon, and Gaston in cells, while Crystal, and the Blue Dodge Challenger, Blue Beam, stand guard; Goofy gets the Ice Cream cake from the freezer, and Hater is seen frozen inside, trapped in a block of ice).

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

From another Universe, Tempus watched the proceedings and chuckled, as he waved his hand and the screen disappeared.

" ** _But little do they know that my plans-“_**

He turned back to look at the ruins of Wastelands Mean Street… and The Shadow Blot, Matrix Energy flowing from him, looking to be in a deep slumber.

Until his eyes shot open.

**_"- have just begun to take form."_ **

000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000

**TO BE CONTINUED IN SECURITY AUTHORS SEASON 2**

**(coming Summer of 2014)**

**BYE PEOPLES! THANKS FOR READING!**

**(apololgies to those who lost their sanity during reading)**

**_Special Thanks to Fanatic97 for inspiring the idea and co-writing. :)_ **


End file.
